Author's Note: Thanks for all the wonderful reviews, everyone! I know it took me a while to post this, and truth be told, I had 3 different versions completely written out for this chapter. So I had to make the decision to choose this one because it flowed better than the others. It's not that exciting, but I hope you guys like!
CHAPTER NINE: ANOTHER BRICK IN THE WALL
Brooke wriggled underneath the covers as she blinked her eyes open, realizing the sun was directly on her face as it shone through the window across from her. She remembered the previous night's events; wallowing in her sorrow at her house and eventually finding her way to Nathan's house to lure her away from another drunken night. Turning to face the door behind her, she found it open and could see Jamie running back and forth in the living room doing God knows what. She smiled at the vision of her godson with a smile plastered on his face and it didn't take long for him to catch her eye from a distance. The little boy wandered over to the guestroom, greeting his godmother as she lay in bed with a smile returning his.
"Daddy says you were having a really bad night, that's why you're sleeping so long." He blurted out, shamelessly.
"Uh," Brooke tried to wake herself up completely, her eyes glancing at the clock on the wall indicating it was noon time, "Yeah, Daddy's right. I'm just really tired."
"Does this mean you can't watch me while I go swimming? Daddy's gonna take Gracie to see the doctor and the only way I can go swimming is if someone watches me."
Brooke chuckled as she nodded her head, "Yeah, I can do that."
"Awesome!" Jamie cheered, running out of the room and knocking right into his father's legs.
"Didn't I say no running in the house?" Nathan looked down at the little boy, who clearly ignored his question and ran upstairs to get himself ready. He shook his head as his eyes lingered to Brooke's, who was now sitting up on the bed, "Afternoon, sunshine."
She smiled, running her fingers through her hair to straighten it out, "I've got lifeguard duty, apparently."
Nathan nodded with a smile, "I have to take Gracie to see Dr. Copeland for a little bit and that little runt wants to go swimming so badly."
"Well, at least he's conquered his fear of the water, right?" She reminded him, and agreed, "I have some things to do at the store today so I'll bring Jamie with me afterwards."
"That's fine," Nathan leaned against the doorframe, "I'm bringing Gracie to my mom so I can train with Dean later tonight."
Regardless of their innocent conversation, the elephant in the room didn't go unnoticed. Nathan broke the ice by clearing his throat, noticing Brooke's eyes wandering to the floor, "You gonna be okay?"
Her eyes stayed on the floor, using it as a projection screen as she recalled yesterday in her head, "I think so. Or at least, I hope so. I'm sorry for showing up so late and being such a complete me—"
"You know, I would think by now you'd know that you're always welcome here," Nathan assured her, "And you have nothing to apologize for, Brooke."
"I know, it's just—I try to get my mind off of him and I try to just move on but I can't when he keeps throwing it all back in my face." She recalled the 82 letters, and the night at the River Court, and the fight before the wedding. "I mean, I'm so sick of crying over it but…I don't know how else to be. I'm supposed to be happy for my best friend but at the same time I can't help but feel betrayed by both of them…it's so…it frustrates me beyond reason."
"Hey," Nathan walked into the room, squatting in front of her, cutting in between her eyes and the floor. He slowly lifted her chin so their eyes could meet and he instantly felt her pain, "It's gonna be okay. Come here," He stood up and she followed suit, "Everything's gonna be okay." He pulled her in an embrace and she tried her best to believe everything he'd said.
Peyton and Lucas sat across from each other in the dining room, both picking at their breakfast and avoiding each other's eyes. Inside, Peyton couldn't shake the feeling that no matter how hard she loved him, he'd never get rid of his feelings for her best friend. And it sickened her. It sickened her that this one man can cause so much drama for two friends. This man. The one she loved unconditionally and would do anything for. The one who can't make up his mind even after being married.
"What did you do, Luke?" She broke the silence, her voice dry and tired.
Lucas didn't need to ask what she meant, evidenced by him sleeping on the couch the night before, "I found the letters she'd written me—"
"You still keep them?" She cut him off, her eyes suddenly widening as she looked at him.
He looked up from his plate, "What am I supposed to do with them? Just throw them away?"
She didn't respond, but by the way she sat in her chair, it was clear what he wanted her to do with them. "I can't do that, Peyton," He refused, "She's a big part of—"
"Your past, Lucas," She finished for him with correction as she shook her head in frustration, "Dammit."
"Hey," He replied, "Don't do that. You know how much I love you."
"You know what, Luke?" She threw her fork down and stood up, "That doesn't mean much to me right now."
Before he could reply, her back was already facing him and she'd grabbed her keys before walking out the door.
"Jamie, be careful!" Brooke called out to him as he ran into the swimming pool for the hundredth time in the last half hour. He giggled feverishly in the water as she sat in a chair, shaking her head at the little boy full of energy.
"Hey, Aunt Brooke!" Jamie practically yelled from the swimming pool, "How come you're not moved in yet?"
Her smile quickly faded as she made sure she'd heard what he'd just said, "Excuse me?"
"I said," Jamie tried to swim a little closer, his little legs kicking under him as fast as he could, "how come you haven't moved in yet? You're always here helping Daddy take care of us."
"Uh," She stuttered, shocked that he'd even brought it up, "I dunno, buddy."
"I just think it'll be really cool," Jamie added, his hands finally reaching the edge of the pool, "And Daddy likes having you around."
She chuckled at his honesty, "Does he now?"
"Yep," He smiled, "He told me last night when he was tucking me in. He said you're making everything better for us and he likes having you here."
She wriggled her eyebrows, touched that he'd confided in his son that way, "Well, your mom's my best friend so I just wanna make sure her family's gonna be okay."
"Don't worry, Aunt Brooke," Jamie smiled, "We'll be okay as long as you're here." He splashed her with some water as he laughed, swimming away from her to mind his own business. Brooke watched him as his words replayed in her head, and it was the first time she'd ever felt wanted in anyone's life.
"There's my little girl!" Deb clasped her hands as Nathan walked into his parents' house, holding Gracie in his arms as he handed the baby to her, "Hi, sweetie pie." She smiled at her granddaughter, completely wrapped up in the presence of her.
His parents were enjoying a late lunch in the backyard and as surreal as it was to Nathan, his mother seemed to be happy and it was all he could ask for.
"How are you, son?" Dan greeted him, standing up to pat him on the shoulder.
Nathan, much to his discomfort, nonetheless smiled in return, "Better."
Deb pulled herself away from the baby to look at her son, "Thanks to Brooke Davis, I believe."
Nathan chuckled and Dan caught the glimmer in his eyes, "Well, what do you know? Someone's got you smiling again."
"Dad," Nathan warned, "It's not like that. She's helping me out at home while I go back to training."
"I'm just saying," Dan replied as innocently as he could, but the smirk on his face said otherwise, "Don't rule out falling in love again, Nathan."
Nathan furrowed his eyebrows, "Haley's only been gone for a month—"
"Don't mind your father," Deb interrupted him before a brawl ensued at her house, "All he's saying is that it's not unusual to find love after…you know."
"Yeah, yeah," Nathan nodded, desperate to get off the subject his parents shouldn't even be lecturing him about, "Anyway, I'm gonna go play basketball with Dean. You mind if I pick her up sometime tonight?"
"That's fine, honey. We're staying home today." Deb replied, beginning to walk away to retreat into their house.
Nathan and Dan stood side by side, the awkwardness growing between them by the second despite both their efforts to be a normal father and son. "I think you're doing great, Nathan," Dan spoke up, "I know I never really said it to you, but I'm proud of the man you've become."
Nathan could swear he'd entered the twilight zone at the sound of his father's words. Ones that didn't involve "idiot" and "failure." Still, the attempt didn't go unappreciated, "Thanks, I guess." Without any further words, Nathan turned to walk away but Dan was quick to have the last words.
"Nathan? I know I've messed up, but I'm really trying."
Nathan nodded his head, allowing himself to accept Dan's attempt at an apology after all these years. His father walked away, joining his wife to be with his granddaughter as Nathan stood in the backyard alone. Not long after, his cell phone rang and he picked it up when Dean's name flashed across the screen.
"Dude." Dean greeted him before he had a chance to say hello. "I need your help."
"Hey, man," Nathan replied, "My day's going fine, thanks. How are you?"
Dean ignored his friend's sarcasm, "Whatever, hey. So! I need your help. I'm at this ring store…and then I realized, I don't have a single clue as to what kind of ring I need to get for Rae—"
"See, stuff like this usually comes up in conversation during a long-term relationship, but you're obviously the exception." Nathan cut him off, still finding it odd that his best friend was about to propose.
"Yeah, you're funny, Brooke-kisser. Anyway, can you find the time out of your busy day to help me figure this out?"
The desperation in Dean's voice cued Nathan to take the situation more seriously, "Sure. Where are you?"
"The jewelry store on the corner of Front St. and Grace St."
Nathan made a mental note of the location, then realized how little Dean knew when it came to proposing, "Dude, you're at the jewelry store across Clothes Over Bros?"
"What part of 'I need your help' did you not understand?" Dean asked rhetorically in an irritated tone. Nathan laughed, agreeing to meet with him as soon as possible. He hung up the phone just as Brooke's name displayed on the screen. Without hesitation, and already knowing why she was calling him, he answered the phone, "Let me guess…"
Brooke was laughing on the other line, barely able to say any words coherently, "So you know?"
"I'm already on my way." Nathan chuckled.
"Good, 'cause I'm trying my best to have Jamie keep Rae busy in the back." She shook her head as she watched the Chevy Impala parked directly across the street, hanging up the phone as a smile crept up on her face.
Nathan walked into the store, spotting Dean across the room sitting in a chaise with a catalog in his hands. Walking towards his friend, the jeweler greeted him as Dean stood up, "Oh, thank God you're here. This has got to be the most difficult decision I've ever made in my life!"
"Yeah, clearly," Nathan greeted him with a pat on the back, "Did you find anything you think she'd like?"
Dean opened the catalog before him, "This one looks nice, but I'm not sure how it'd look or fit for that matter."
Nathan nodded his head, agreeing with the photo before him. "You don't even know her ring size?"
Dean slammed the catalog shut, glaring at him for the question. Nathan chuckled at Dean's defensiveness before reaching for his cell phone, "All right, hold on a second." He walked away for a moment, looking outside the glass windows as he talked on his phone. Dean and the jeweler exchanged nervous and hopeful glances for the time being. Dean watched Nathan hang up his phone, and as he looked past his shoulder, noticed Brooke crossing the street, making her way towards the jewelry store.
Dean opened his mouth wide in surprise, "You told her?"
"It's not like she didn't already know, genius. You parked across her store," Nathan replied, opening the door and allowing Brooke to step inside, "Thanks for coming."
"No problem," She smiled at Dean, her dimples proudly on display, "Just make it quick 'cause Jamie's running out of coloring books to keep them occupied."
Dean quickly glared at Nathan, but revealed a happier expression towards the brunette, "Great, even Jamie knows. Hi, Brooke."
"Hey, Romeo," She teased him, "So what can I do for you?"
Nathan stepped in behind her, "He doesn't know Rae's ring size or how it would look on her, so I thought maybe you could provide the dummy finger for us."
Brooke agreed as she walked towards the jeweler for him to take her ring size after Dean showed him the ring he'd been staring at in the catalog the entire time he was there. Dean and Nathan stood behind her, anxious and excited all at once as the jeweler measured her finger and pulled out the ring Dean chose for Rae.
"Oh my…" Brooke held her other hand up to her mouth at the sight of the ring as the jeweler slipped it on her left ring finger, "Wow."
Nathan took a place beside her and eyed the rock on her finger, his jaw practically dropping to the floor, "Wow." He exchanged glances with Brooke, who'd remained speechless soon after the ring touched her skin.
"Then this is it," Dean made the decision, nodding to the jeweler, "I'm gonna ask her to marry me."
She stood with her hands inside her sweater, one she found in her car as she drove on the way here. The sun was shining brightly but a cool breeze swept by, and her feet were planted on the ground below her as she stared at her mother's gravestone.
She'd always found solace visiting her mother, although the irony didn't go unnoticed. Here she was, full of misery it seemed, and the only place she found peace was at the cemetery.
"Hey, stranger."
She turned around to find Nathan making his way towards her and a curious look displayed on her face, "Hey, yourself."
"I thought I saw your car from a distance," Nathan acknowledged, stopping as he stood beside her facing her mother's resting place, "I just visited Haley."
Peyton nodded, making a mental note to do the same before she left. "How are you, Nate?"
He shrugged, looking into her gloomy eyes, "I could ask you the same. You okay?"
She shook her head, sucking in air as she tried her best to remain composed, "Just thinking about how things can get really complicated really fast."
Naturally, he thought of his brother and their recent altercation involving Brooke. "I just…needed someone to talk to who wouldn't judge how I feel or who I am or the choices I make. So I came here because I know my mother will help me get through this." She folded her arms across her chest to hold herself up as Nathan placed his hand on her shoulder.
"Look, Peyton, I know things are kinda crazy...and I'm sorry if I made it that way by barging in your house and threatening Lucas, but—"
"No, Nate," She interrupted him, "It's not you. It opened my eyes, actually. It's this…It's this feeling deep inside me that says maybe … maybe this isn't the path I was meant to walk on."
"Marrying Lucas?"
"I don't know," she shrugged, "He's my soulmate, right? Maybe I'm crazy to think that we've really got something epic here."
"Hey," He extended his hand to reach across her other shoulder, pulling her in close to him, "do you love him?"
She nodded as she looked down at her feet, despite all the hell she had to endure the last few years, "With my whole heart."
"Then you fight like hell for it, Peyton. I know Lucas loves you, and he has a tendency to mess up, but look at me and Haley. We've been through loan sharks, Chris Keller, Nanny Carrie, bar fights…I mean, you do what you can for the ones you love."
"What if he doesn't wanna fight for our marriage? What if he gives up on us and decides he'd rather be with Brooke?"
"Fat chance," Nathan comforted her, and she looked up in confusion as he nodded towards the distance seeing Lucas walking towards them, "He's fighting for you now."
Later that evening, Brooke knocked on the door of the Scotts' household, with Jamie standing beside her as they patiently waited for an answer. Not long after, Deb opened the front door and greeted the two with a smile on her face, "This is a surprise."
"Grandma! I mean—Nanny Deb!" Jamie exclaimed, not hesitating to raise his arms up in the air for her to carry him. She swept him up quickly, amazed she still had the strength in her to carry a boy his age. After an array of Eskimo kisses, she invited Brooke in and led her to the living room.
"I don't know if Nate told you, but he asked me to pick up Gracie. He's still training with Dean," Brooke clarified.
Deb waved a hand as she put Jamie down, who immediately went in search of his grandfather, "Oh, no problem, I'm actually glad you're here."
"Oh," Brooke replied, surprised considering she'd never had more than a ten-minute conversation with the woman, "Thanks, I guess."
"Take a seat," Deb gestured to her and she happily obliged, taking her place on the couch as Deb sat beside her, "I just want to say thank you."
"Um," Brooke paused for a moment, "For—"
"For taking care of my son and grandchildren," Deb placed her hand atop one of Brooke's, "I mean, no one ever asked you and you did it out of the goodness of your heart. So I really appreciate that."
Brooke could feel herself blushing at the compliment, "Thanks, Deb. I just…Haley was my best friend and Jamie's my godson so I didn't even have to think twice about it—"
"That's exactly what I mean," Deb added, "You've grown into such a mature, beautiful, and selfless woman and I am so proud of you, for your achievements and how you treat others. Don't forget, Brooke, I practically watched every single one of you grow up…despite my stint at rehab and all."
Brooke chuckled at the awkward subject, "You know, to be honest, it's nice to have …. Like a mom, around. You and Karen have been so good to all of us and it's nice to have women like you to turn to. Considering my mother's the wife of Lucifer, but let's not go there…"
The two shared a laugh; although Deb had never met Victoria Davis, the horror stories were enough to supply her with the information to hand over the "Worst Mother Ever" award to the woman. "Well, if you need to hear it, you're not like her. Not even close." Deb assured her.
Brooke smiled thankfully, "I don't mean to be nosy, but…" She looked around momentarily to make sure they were alone in the living room, "How did you end up giving Dan another chance?"
"Oh," Deb laughed, "That's a long story. All you need to know is that the heart has its reasons to give others another chance, despite all the bad things that happened. I mean, I know Dan's no angel, but he's trying…and he's really different now."
"Weird," Brooke couldn't shake the feeling of Dan being a good guy, "But I guess you can't argue with love, huh?"
Deb shook her head in reply, "No matter how hard you try."
"Yeah," Brooke's mind quickly drifted to her first love, "It's hard to let go sometimes."
Deb knew who had been in Brooke's heart all these years, feeling a tinge of sadness for her to endure watching her best friend and former love marry one another and bury her feelings for him as she slapped a smile on her face to conceal the hurt. Still, the woman was too young to worry about never falling in love again. Deb held onto Brooke's hand once again, looking into her eyes as she grasped it gently, giving her the assurance and advice a daughter would seek from their mother, "But letting go can open you up to something new and better."
"I can't believe you're gonna ask her to marry you." Nathan shook his head in disbelief as he caught the ball Dean passed to him.
"And I can't believe you're not gonna tell Brooke she kissed you," Dean countered back, his hands on his hips like a child taunting another.
"We've been through this before, Dean," Nathan warned, keeping the ball tucked between his arm and side, "it's not like that."
"Okay, maybe it's not," Dean played along, "so why don't you just bring it up anyway? I mean, what are you gonna lose?"
"First of all, I don't need to make things weird between us. It's bad enough she's still trying to get over Lucas—"
"So she's trying to get over Lucas by kissing his brother?" Dean cut him off.
"Dude," Nathan shook his head, "We're friends. There's no point in telling her if nothing's ever going to happen between us."
"And you're so sure of it?"
"Of course," Nathan proudly answered, "Haley's my first love and I just don't think I'll ever find anything like that again."
"Okay, fine, I get it," Dean agreed, "But I find it hard to believe that you don't think you'll ever fall for anyone ever again. You're 23, not 80."
"I didn't say that. I said I don't think what I had with Haley would ever be the same with Brooke."
Dean was clearly growing impatient, "Who said it had to be the same?"
"I don't wanna talk about this anymore," Nathan passed the ball back to him, "Game over."
"Whatever, pansy," Dean teased him, "You claim to not have any kind of attraction to Brooke Davis, yet you have no problem keeping her at your house 24/7."
"I never said I don't think Brooke's attract—"
"Ha-HA!" Dean pointed at him, "So you've noticed? That means something, Nathan. For you to even think that she's remotely attractive? Come ooon…"
"Okay, you know what? I find Rae and Peyton attractive, but that doesn't mean I'm in love with them—"
"Better not," Dean cut in.
"And Jamie loves having Brooke around. She's helped us get through all this fairly easily and okay, fine, I admit—she's been there practically every day. But that's because she can't stand being alone at home where her mind can drift off to my jackass of a brother, and I'd rather have her at my house than at Tric wallowing her sorrows in alcohol."
Dean stared at him blankly, as if he'd just been stumped with the hardest math equation in his head. "So you care about her…"
"Of course, I care about her!" Nathan practically shouted as he admitted it, "And what we have going right now is really good and I don't wanna screw all that up by telling her that she drunk-kissed me, because for all I know, she probably thought I was Lucas—"
"Okay, okay," Dean stopped him, "I get it, drama queen. Geez. Had I know you'd go off like this, I would've never brought her up."
Nathan slightly laughed, shaking his head and wondering why he'd reacted that way. "Whatever. I gotta head home. Brooke's there with the ki—"
Dean shot him a look, and Nathan quickly stopped mid-sentence, "You're so pathetic, Nate."
"You're one to talk with your shotgun proposal," Nathan retorted, although it didn't do much damage to Dean's ego.
"Yeah, whatever. I'll see ya," Dean walked off, giving him a quick wave as both of them headed to their own cars.
Nathan stepped into the house, donning his basketball attire and setting his duffel bag near the bottom of the stairs. He hadn't realized that the time had flown by during his training with Dean, finally coming home close to 9pm. He looked around for any signs of life, and immediately saw her as she made her way downstairs, "Hey."
"How'd basketball go?" Brooke asked, finally reaching the bottom of the stairs and standing in front of him.
"It went." Nathan replied, and Brooke shook her head at the lack of details.
"I just tucked Jamie in, but I'm sure he's still awake if you want to say goodnight," Brooke added, pointing with her thumb to the direction of his bedroom, "And Gracie's been out cold since I picked her up from your Mom's."
"Thanks for that, by the way," Nathan acknowledged her, "Have you had dinner yet?"
"Yeah, actually, I succumbed to the Easy Mac," Brooke admitted with a laugh, "I was actually just waiting for you before I head home."
"You're gonna go home?" He furrowed his brows.
"Uh, yeah," Brooke replied, unsure as to why he'd asked the question, "I do have a house, Nathan."
"Well, um," Nathan began to stutter, not knowing what his next words would be. He'd be lying if he said that it wasn't nice having Brooke around so much that she practically lived there, but a part of him felt conflicted considering his wife had recently passed away and the whole family was still in the process of healing from it. But he had to admit, the healing process had gone smoothly because of Brooke.
Brooke grew confused as he stumbled with his words and was quick to wave it off by walking past him and reaching for her purse on the couch, "Okay, well, I'm gonna go home."
Nathan watched as she gathered her things and made her way to the front door, saying goodbye with a dimpled smile on her face as she exited the house. He stood there, and strangely enough, started wondering if the right thing to do was let her leave; or whether he should've made her stay.