Title: Burden of Proof

Warning: Confusion, an old mech with something to prove, and various sexual happenings as a result.

Rating: R

Continuity: G1

Characters: Kup, Dinobots, Hot Rod, Optimus Prime, Ironhide, Prowl, Bumblebee, Spike Witwicky, Wheeljack, Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, Ratchet, Perceptor, Mirage, Onslaught, Blast Off, Ultra Magnus, Menasor, Laserbeak, Jazz, Megatron.

Disclaimer: The theatre doesn't own the script or actors.

Motivation (Prompt): Daendereth wanted to see Kup get some. Then a profoundly annoying Kup-hating anon bothered a bunch of people on Tumblr, and I decided Kup needed to get it all.

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Pt. 10: "Old mechs show them how it's done."

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Most orns, Ratchet couldn't interest the rest of the Ark in the medbay's small library of instructional manuals to save their lives.

Ever since Wheeljack's ravishment - for lack of a more dramatic term, because dear holy Primus, the explosion hadn't even been the main event - Ratchet hadn't been able to able to keep the bookfiles on the shelves. A pity Sunstreaker and Sideswipe had scoffed at the idea of research. They might have lasted longer had they read up on proper technique instead of just winging it.

It was too late for them, but the rest of the Autobots seemed to have taken the lesson to spark. There had been a rush on the medbay. Library cards had become badges of honor. First Aid's interfacing safety classes were suddenly packed, standing room only, which made the technique demo part of the class very much an audience participation thing.

Currently, the medbay was silent except for the occasional short exclamation of shock. Six Autobots, all of them totally absorbed in their reading. Ratchet put his hands on his hips and surveyed his domain, nodding to himself. Excellent. Everyone in good health, learning stuff. He liked it when his patients learned stuff. It generally meant he didn't have to teach them himself, or fix them after they tried things without following the instructions.

Jazz had given him the big pleading visor of cyberpuppies everywhere when Ratchet had caught him playing hooky from filling the top three ranks by himself. It'd bought the black-and-white mech thirty minutes. He and Cliffjumper were using that half an hour to share the pop-up hologram bookfile on advanced connection circuits. Their expressions bounced between interested and stunned. Appropriate expressions for a bookfile entitled 'This Goes There: An Engineer's Erotic Guide.' Ratchet had always liked the illustrations on that one.

Arcee slipped through the medbay's doors, library card in hand, but Ratchet held up a hand to refuse her. "These won't help you," he said in a hushed tone. "Wait ten more minutes and you can take his place." He nodded at Jazz, who had his head cocked sideways as he and Cliffjumper tried to see under the hologram model's hood. Ratchet shook his head at their stupidity.

Confused, Arcee looked at the two bookfiles currently on the shelf. "But - "

Ratchet reached out to turn them so she could see the author. "Trust me, Arcee. These won't help you." Her optics rounded. She's been in Kup's unit too long not to have heard those instructions told in story format seven times over. "Actually, if you know the stories by spark, you could do everyone a favor by retelling them in the rec room tonight. He's a better storyteller than writer, to be honest, and I think most people are just checking these manuals out so they can rev up over the pictures." The instructions were useful but dull compared to Kup's tale of how he'd learned to interface upside-down, over a barrel, underwater, using only rapid databursts.

Arcee looked thoughtful. "I could do that, but it'd help if I had some visual aids."

Arms stole around Ratchet from behind, and the medic started in surprise. "But where are we gonna find a tank that big?" a familiar voice asked into his audio.

Arcee smiled. "Leave that to me."

"We'll be there." Kup pulled Ratchet back toward the CMO's office. "Eventually."

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