Chapter Ten
My handsome stranger returned again. He told me his name was Bakura and I told him I already knew that. He asked me why I would invite him home and tend to his wound should I have known who he was. I told him he didn't scare me. He looked at me with a sinister smirk and backed me into the corner of my home. He brought a knife from his jacket pocket and held it to my neck. I could read him easily. I knew he was doing this to intimidate me. He had no intention of hurting me. Though the sweat still formed on my brow as he pressed the knife harder against me. I could feel it pierce my skin.
'Scared yet?' he had asked.
I told him I was not afraid to die.
He removed the knife from my neck and moved away from me. He told me he didn't know if I were brave or stupid.
…
He stayed with me that evening and asked about my family. I told him they were all dead. I could tell he was surprised by the lack of emotion in my voice.
…
As far as Bakura is aware Pharaoh Aknamkanon only has one child, my brother. Like many others he had never seen me or heard of me. My birth was never publicized.
…
I came home today to find Bakura looking at the scrolls I had left laid out on the floor. Immediately, my heart leapt from my chest, I expected him to be in a rage. He turned and looked at me.
'What's for dinner?' he had asked.
It was then I realized that he cannot read.
…
A few days later he asked me what it was that I was always writing. I thought best not to lie to him so I told him aside from my diary I was writing a book. It was partially true and he seemed to accept my response. He did ask what it was about and I told him I wasn't really sure yet. Again, it wasn't too far from the truth.
…
The book I am writing is a book of shadows. I'm not sure why I felt the need to write such a book but I began to anyway. So far the book consists of spells and magic rituals that I experienced growing up. I plan to write about the dangerous power my father and his guardians experimented with and to perhaps someday start practicing myself. I always wondered where they disappeared to for such long hours each day. So one day, I followed them and what I saw took my breath away.
Monsters, real monsters and magic!
Things that I had only heard about in stories and fables.
Over the years I continued to follow them whenever I could. I watched what really went on behind the closed doors of the palace. I had discovered a secret life, hidden among the shadows of Egypt.
…
Sometimes when I write I feel it is not me doing so. There are things that end up written on the page that I can't explain. Things that I had never thought of or knew of before. It doesn't surprise me as much as you would think. I find strange things always happen in the dark.
…
Bakura woke me when he came to mine in the middle of the night. He was covered in blood and I dared not ask what he had done. Like a loyal servant I cleaned him up and made him a cup of broth. Somehow growing up I never thought my life would revolve around harbouring a fugitive.
…
While shopping today I heard gossip on the street about a man who was robbed at knife point. On surrendering his most valued items the perpetrator slashed his throat. I thought back to the day Bakura held me with a knife to my throat. Would he really go through with his threat?
…
To get on his good side I asked Bakura if he wanted me to teach him how to read. He seemed insulted that I would offer such a thing. I was only trying to be nice but he took great offense. I dropped the subject quickly after that.
…
I am not sure why he keeps coming back to me. He hardly initiates conversation when he is here. He just sits in the room with me and watches while I write. I can't yet figure him out. I think maybe he just longs for another's company.
…
Today Bakura asked me if my offer to teach him to read still stood. His question took me of guard and I wondered why he had changed his mind. I told him of course I would help and we got to work straight away.
…
I have never had to teach anyone anything before. I wasn't aware I had any skills another wished to possess. I try to be patient but Bakura gets frustrated easily.
…
He asked me how I knew to read and write. I told him my father taught me. He asked how my father knew and I said I assumed his father had taught him. Bakura looked at me oddly, he knew I was hiding something. It didn't occur to me until later in the evening that not everyone knows how to read. The privilege is reserved only for the wealthy and the high of society. As much as I initially mocked his intellect he is a lot more switched on than I imagined.
…
I have spent the week teaching Bakura to read. He is a fast learner and soon he will learn to write. I asked him if there was a particular reason he wanted to learn. He shrugged his shoulders. When I lay awake at night I wonder what goes through his mind. His eyes hold so much pain and anguish and almost a sense of resentment. I think about where he lived before he met me, who his friends are; if there are any. He doesn't open up or share anything. I feel I do all the talking and soon I fear I'll run out of conversation. I know he is a killer and I know I should end all ties with him though there is something about him that draws me in.
…
I am thinking now that the more he learns to read I may have to hide my diary and book from his prying eyes. Though I have no clue as to where to keep them.
…
Today Bakura and I went out together. It was my father's birthday and the whole town was celebrating. While neither of us felt like celebrating him we still went to see the festivities. Both fully cloaked so no one would recognize either of us, Bakura asked me why I felt the need to hide myself when I went out. I asked him the same question. He replied because obviously he was a criminal. I asked him how he knew that I wasn't one too. He laughed at me and told me I was far too innocent. I'm not sure if I should take that as a compliment.
We walked all afternoon. We had never spoken to one another as much as we did then. I am sure we walked through every street in the city. Bakura knew a lot about everything. He told me of all the people we passed, who they were and what their stories were. He seemed to know everyone's business. He knew where everyone lived and what they got up to, both during the day and night. I learnt a lot about the peasant side of the city I had never known. His stories fascinated me.
It was then he opened up to me and told me of his past. He said his mother and father raised him and his younger sister in a small village outside of the city. A village named Kul Elna.
I listened with horror as he described in full detail the day he returned to find his city destroyed and his family and villagers brutally murdered. He was only ten at the time. He was the only one to survive.
It was my father that ordered the massacre.
Pharaoh Aknamkanon.
Bakura had spat his name as if it were poison rolling off his tongue. I struggled to breathe and he asked why I was so pale. I told him it was just a horrific story and the thought of it made me feel sick.
I knew my father did some horrible things but what kind of coward destroys a village full of innocent men, woman and children? Bakura told me it was to create the Millennium Items and that made me want to cry.
It can't be true!
He can't possibly hang that puzzle around his neck and wear the slaughter like it was some kind of trophy.
If I didn't hate him enough already, I despise him even more.
…
I thought maybe it would be best if I told Bakura the truth about who I was before it became to long for him to forgive me of my deceit. I don't want to be associated with my father but I know the past has a sneaky way of exposing itself when it's not wanted.
…
I planned to tell Bakura today but surprisingly he did not come over.
…
There is still no sign of him but I heard the palace had been robbed and a few guards killed. I think remembering his past may have unleashed his inner demons.
…
Bakura finally returned to the strange home he has made with me. I told him I had something important to tell him and urged him to sit.
I told him about my mother and how much I loved her. I cried as I spoke about her and I could tell Bakura did not know what to do. He wasn't skilled in the art of comforting another.
He listened carefully as I continued my story. I told him that it was only fair he should know my past after he shared the disturbing details of his.
It was then I told him who my father was. At first he didn't believe me but as I continued on he flew into a rage. I told him I never meant to lie to him and when I told him my family was dead I truly meant they were dead to me.
He accused me of betraying his trust. He asked if this was all just a set up planned by my father to have him captured. I denied his crazy theories.
Before I could say anything further he attacked me. I fell delusional on the floor. The blood poured from the graze above me eye and I squinted at the pain he inflicted on me. Bakura pulled me to my feet and slammed me into the wall.
I begged and pleaded for him to let me go.
He grabbed my throat and squeezed tightly threatening to break the bones beneath my skin and end my life.
Bakura watched as the life slowly drained from my eyes.
'They killed my mother.' I barely breathed. 'That's why I left.' I admitted.
Bakura stared at me for a while longer then lightened the grip around my neck however still tight enough to keep me in one place.
I told him I despised them as much as he did. They took my mother away like they did his family.
He didn't say anything so I asked him what I had to do to make him believe me. I wasn't prepared for his answer.
'Give yourself to me.' He said and released me from his grip.
I will never forget those words.
My voice caught nervously in my throat and I couldn't answer him.
'If what you are saying is true and you hold no connection to your past then give yourself to me. Only then will I believe you.'
I had never laid with a man before. To be honest the thought of it before I had met Bakura repulsed me. I felt his hot breath on my neck as he waited for my answer.
So many thoughts travelled through my mind. There was no turning back if I went through with this. The ties to my past would be broken forever. I would never have the chance to return to the palace, never the chance to marry for a princess had to be pure. Bakura would taint me and no man would want to be with me but him. My father would never forgive me. And should anything happen to my brother there was no chance I could ever be Queen.
Despite all the obvious ramifications that would arise from my actions I chose to be with him. My first kiss with him sealed my fate.
He took me to my room and threw me on the bed. Our intimacy lasted into the early hours of the morning. He played with me like a child would a doll, with only their pleasure in mind and no care for the other. He kept his eyes fixed on me the whole time as if waiting for me to back out.
It hurt at first but I felt like I deserved it.
When the pain subsided I relished in the bliss of sex and the feeling of betraying my father. Being wrapped in the arms of his enemy gave me a disturbed sense of happiness.
I know Bakura doesn't trust me but I hope my submission to him will change his mind. I feel like I have no one else. He is the only one in my life now my mother has gone. I thought about her briefly as I quivered beneath his strong body. I wondered what she thought about each time she lay with a man. Did she reflect on her life and come to think 'how did I get here?' Did she regret anything? Did she ever feel love for the man she was with?
I watch Bakura now as he sleeps in my bed. He looks peaceful as he rests. It's almost unnatural to see him this way… so vulnerable. He has experienced a pain only I can relate to and I feel like that connects us somehow.
My mother once told me to never rely on a man to make me happy. They always stray, they always cheat and worst of all they will steal your heart.
That can't possibly be true? Can it?
Thank you to KoriTheEvilEditor, Anshu, justsukiya and Getsunohimesama for reviewing my last chapter and to everyone else who read, followed and added as a favorite. You guys are the best!
I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter.