Identity of Love and Sand

by YZYdragon2222

Shikadai's heritage has always been an important part of his life, in ways he knows too well and in ways he hasn't discovered. He assumes his identity as Konoha's next lazy shadow-manipulating genius, because anything else would be too troublesome. However, after an attempt on his life, he, with Uncle Gaara's help, unearths his roots in the Sand and forges a new identity.

10. Chapter 9: Turning a New Sand

My beloved readers, welcome to Chapter 9 of "Identity of Love and Sand" and the month of February of 2016. My spirits have already been made with the arrival of my favorite month of the year, dubbed such for two reasons: Chinese New Year (新年快乐！万事如意！恭喜发财！ 红包拿来！), and my birthday on its 22nd day! My Sweet Sixteen's coming up in less than a week, y'all! You know what to do in order to heighten my spirits even further, love: READ AND REVIEW!

I see this chapter as a transitory chapter: still, it's long-longer than I anticipated. Hope that's all right with you.

Some of you have been asking (NarutoFan2018) whether Shikadai can control Gold Dust or sand or both. Answer: GOLD DUST. Sand manipulation is Shukaku's power, which can't be inherited. Gold Dust manipulation is the power of the Magnet Release kekkei genkai, the bloodline of Shikadai's ancestors.

Also, if you haven't seen it yet, you MUST go see Misfitts's new deviation on DeviantArt. I literally fangirled when I saw it although I felt silly for fangirling over art of my own fanfiction. Silly YZY. Misfitts, thank you so much! You are an AWESOME artist. I won't tell you which scene the artwork is from because I want you all to go see that masterpiece FOR YOURSELVES!

Chapter 9—Turning A New Sand

The Kazekage and Hokage: the Jinchuuriki pair-two very, very formidable opponents.

But then again, so were the old woman and man and sitting directly across from them.

Next to the Hokage sat his adviser, Shikamaru Nara, and next to the Kazekage sat his sister, Temari. They were two very involved members of this particular...battle.

And yet, Koharu and Homura refused to even look at that them in the eye.

How troublesome, Shikamaru thought. Normally I try to avoid talking to these two at all costs. Now I don't have a choice.

Naruto chuckled nervously at their pursed lips. He used to laugh at Grandma Tsunade when she would drink away her woes after having dealt with these two "old geezers". He dared not mention that anymore for he felt exactly the same way. He discreetly wondered why Koharu and Homura couldn't be more fun, like Suna's Ebizo and long-deceased Granny Chiyo. He also felt guilty for wondering why they hadn't yet joined Chiyo.

"So uh...what do you say to our...proposal?" he asked tentatively.

Naruto's smile faltered when he only received grumpy frowns in return. Koharu was the first to speak.

"You do realize what you're asking for, don't you, Lord Hokage?"

"Actually, it was I who submitted the request, Lady Koharu," Gaara quickly defended his friend. "And yes, to answer your question, I believe that would be necessary for us to pose the question in the first place."

Koharu and Homura redirected their scowls toward Gaara, allowing Naruto to breathe a sigh of relief. The Hokage was easily frustrated with them, but with the Kazekage, the two elders were in for a fight: Gaara had patience and a smart mouth when it came to dealing with difficult old people. His ability to stun Onoki, the Third Tsuchikage, to silence when he was only fifteen years old was a testament to that.

I knew that allowing that Nara to marry that Suna girl all those years ago was a mistake, Homura thought bitterly. "With all due respect, Lord Kazekage: I can't help but find the timing of your...proposal to be slightly suspicious. You had twelve years to request for Shikadai Nara to go to Sunagakure. Why would you pull this up now?...especially after he was involved in such a major incident? Excuse me if I am mistaken, but there are many here in Konoha who have...more than a few...reservations regarding your, ah, Sunagakure's partiality in the scheming of the recent event."

Koharu and Homura searched the Kazekage's face for his response-only for some time to pass and to find none.

Why, it's useless trying to provoke this child! Koharu thought. Quite unlike the Hokages. It'll be hard talking past him; we're lucky he hasn't exuded more influence on the Hokage...

Hmph! Thought Homura. What an insensitive young man. He must have a heart of steel to react so nonchalantly to what I just said.

Across from them, Gaara wondered why none of his heartache was ever able to seep out through his hard shell of sand. It's been twenty years since I tried to become a different person...but they still don't trust me.

"Lord Homura, Lady Koharu, please: this is my brother and my son we are talking about. I can say with definite certainty that a third party was involved in the attack and that Gaara had nothing to do with it," Temari replied on behalf of Gaara, her voice firm with no room for argument.

Koharu and Homura looked unconvinced. "If you say so," Koharu said slowly.

Homura crossed his arms. "Regardless, that still doesn't explain why you are so eager to take Shikadai Nara now, of all times."

"Shikadai was recently targeted and attacked, and returned to Konoha half dead. As I would see it, Gaara has all the more reason to invite Shikadai to Sunagakure to train now than of all times, in order to insure his safety and ability to protect himself in the future." And to teach him how to control the Magnet Release. She did not say this out loud, however; Koharu and Homura would never let Shikadai leave Konoha if they knew he was the possessor of such a powerful kekkei genkai.

A frown adorned Koharu's face. "I don't see how it would make any difference were the boy to train in Konoha or Suna. He has two very powerful shinobi for parents." Koharu eyed Shikamaru and Temari, "Would you not say that he is already receiving optimal training right here at home?"

"Yes, he is, but that's different from receiving personal tutelage from the Kazekage," Shikamaru explained.

"The number of shinobi who have been personally instructed by Sabaku no Gaara are very limited." Homaru looked at Gaara quizzically. "And now you, the leader of Suna, are willing to take a Konoha shinobi, of all people, under your wing?"

Gaara would have quirked an eyebrow had he any. His expression seemed to read, Why not?

"A shinobi must never allow himself to be guided by his emotions, Lord Kazekage," Koharu lectured. Naruto rolled his eyes. Is she seriously trying to lecture Gaara? "Konoha and Suna are tied solely by political affiliation, but I daresay your desire to bring Shikadai to Suna is based on your feelings, whatever they may be, towards your nephew. Am I wrong?" Ha, I've got him now! the old woman thought in triumph.

Gaara did not even fidget once. "No, you are rather correct, Lady Koharu. I will do everything within my power to protect those who are precious to me. As Kazekage, the people of Sunagakure are precious to me. Shikadai is unconditionally precious to me because he is my sister's child. But," Gaara continued, allowing Koharu and Homaru no room to interrupt, "he is also a Konoha shinobi. By the nature of the Konoha-Suna alliance-" here, Gaara snuck a glance at Naruto-"every citizen of Konoha is also precious to me, and I will protect them at all costs." Gaara looked Koharu dead in the eye. "I know that Naruto feels the same way for my people. I must congratulate you for having such an open-hearted Hokage."

Score! Naruto thought, stifling his chuckle. He reminded himself to give Gaara a hug later in thanks for complimenting him in front of Koharu and Homura (who were always criticizing him), even though Gaara seemed to hate hugs.

Koharu and Homura looked at each other and pursed their lips again. It seemed that the Kazekage had a talent for cornering them with their own words. In their many, many...many years, such a thing had never happened before.

Homura decided to try a different approach. "From my many years of experience, I have come to realize that the trust Konoha put in other ninja villages was often misplaced. I don't oppose Konoha's alliance with your country at the present, but...I can't help but find the idea of a Konoha shinobi going on a long-term stay in Sunagakure-and associating so closely with the Kazekage-to be unwise."

"Sorry to disappoint you, but you're twelve years too late for that. Shikadai has been 'closely associated' with both of his uncles for all his life." Temari usually spoke with more tact than this, but her patience levels over the past few days were wearing thin. Besides, this is the Konoha Council, she reminded herself. I'm a Suna shinobi, so I'm not obligated to show them ridiculous amounts of respect.

Koharu and Homura wondered if it was too late to revoke the Nara Clan Head's marriage to this annoyingly sassy foreign girl.

"I don't see how this is much different from having Temari here in Konoha," Shikamaru added.

"Your wife is a seasoned and professional shinobi, Mr. Nara. Forgive me for my straightforwardness, but your son is still far from that," Koharu said.

"Isn't that all the more reason to let him go to Suna to get stronger?" Naruto cried.

"That isn't what we were referring to," Homura explained. "Shikadai Nara is just a genin-a child! He is twelve years old, is he not?"

Shikamaru nodded carefully, glancing at his wife. She had many more years of political experience than him, and oh how he hated all this diplomatic talk.

Temari wondered what Homura's acknowledgement of Shikadai's young age meant. She was sure that he wasn't the least bit concerned for his actual welfare.

"This is the age at which shinobi are the most impressionable. At this age, it becomes their village's duty to mold them into the most effective shinobi. It is at this point that their loyalty towards their village is minted and solidified. How do you plan to do that, Lord Hokage, if you allow Shikadai Nara to traipse about in Sunagakure during this period of his young life?"

"Not by inhibiting him from achieving his true potential!" Naruto argued back.

"I assure you, Shikadai won't be traipsing around any more in Sunagakure than he is here in Konoha," Shikamaru drawled. He was well aware of the inexplicable sense of motivation Gaara seemed to elicit within Shikadai; if anything, Shikadai'd have have no traipsing to do if he were in the desert country his uncle led.

"Why do you so adamantly believe a Konoha shinobi will achieve his full potential in Sunagakure?" Homura pressed, frustration finally creeping into his voice.

"This is an era of peace, and friendship," said Gaara in his calm voice, effectively silencing Homura. "The bonds shared between the world's various hidden villages have transcended the times in which shinobi belonged to a single country. In today's world, the hidden villages all represent love, peace, and tranquility, and it is to that that shinobi belong, not to the villages' themselves."

"What a way for a Kazekage to speak," Homura commented. "How do you expect to raise a powerful country with that kind of thinking?"

"I do so by respecting my people and shinobi, and those of the rest of the world. Lord Homura, Lady Koharu: you speak of molding shinobi into effective tools for the sake of their village. This would very well work if the shinobi were not made of flesh and blood. They may bend, but they will not conform to the shape you desire them to hold, unless you desire them to take the shape they themselves desire to take. If you press too hard, they may only retaliate at double the force." Look what happened to me when the Fourth Kazekage tried to mold me into Sunagakure's ultimate weapon.

"You may give a child a bucket and shovel to construct a sandcastle, but even with the right tools, the child will never build you a sandcastle, for you cannot coax the sand with which he plays not to slip through his fingers. That is why...as Kazekage and as a world leader within this era of peace of fraternity, I strive to be the one who does not give the people the tools with which to build the sandcastle, but rather, the water that will bind the shifting grains together: and perhaps, without the bucket and shovel, but their own bare hands, the people can use the sand and the little bit of water to build something far greater than the likes of a castle."

Naruto looked at Gaara with a smile of admiration. Man, I wish I had Gaara's way with words.

Temari's expression was one of pure pride for her baby brother.

Koharu's and Homura's expressions were sour from their inability to conjure a counterargument to the Suna leader's rhetoric.

Finally, Koharu said, "Why, I never would have thought the Kazekage to be such a poet." She meant to mock Gaara with her words, but in her heart of hearts that she would never admit, she was impressed with the serious, crimson-haired young man.

But Gaara looked straight at her as if he knew exactly of the hidden admiration behind her words. "Thank you," he answered monotonously, although a hint of a smirk seemed to play at his lips. As much of a smirk as the stoic Kazekage could muster, anyway.

Still, Koharu and Homura were not called stubborn old geezers for nothing. Homura turned to yet another argument. "The Nara Clan is a prominent clan in Konoha-it's one of our foremost clans, in fact, especially since its Head of Clan is Hokage adviser." Homura nodded at Shikamaru. "Shikadai Nara is next in line for the position, which makes him a more important individual than the average shinobi in Konoha. Despite his young age, he's already looked up to as something of a public figure. Why should we trust Sunagakure enough to put such a valuable Konoha shinobi in your hands?"

Naruto clenched his fists upon hearing Homura speak of shinobi as if prices and values could be slapped onto them.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes, knowing full well that Shikadai was more 'valuable' to Gaara than to the entire population of Konoha combined.

"For the same reason why Sunagakure's has entrusted the safety and protection of the Kazekage Clan's last heir to you."

There was really nothing either Koharu and Homura could say to that, so they sat silently in their seething and scowling glory. They'd lived many years and they still hadn't learned the art of accepting defeat.

"Dammit!" Naruto finally exploded, getting up and slamming his hands down on the table, making all but Gaara jump in surprise. "You stubborn old geezers, don't forgot that I'm Hokage! You can screech and whine all you want, but if I want Shikadai to go to Suna then he's going to Suna. I need your permission to give Shikadai could get official recognition to go to Suna on a training mission, and it'd do wonders for the alliance if Shikadai could pioneer Suna-Konoha inter-village shinobi training. The Kazekage even came personally to ask you nicely. You should be jumping for joy for this kind of opportunity! But if you're gonna sit on your fat asses and be so damn difficult, then I'll just send Shikadai to Suna on an ambassador mission, and there won't be anything you can do about it!"

"Yes there is," Koharu began calmly (though inside she was extremely irked with the Hokage), holding up a restraining hand when Naruto opened his mouth to retort. "We accept your proposal. We will allow Shikadai to pioneer the Suna-Konoha inter-village shinobi training program. He will be permitted to travel to Sunagakure to study with the Kazekage."

"Yes!" Naruto cried, "finally!" He pumped his fists into the air triumphantly.

"Lord Kazekage," Koharu addressed Gaara, "did you not say oppose the bending of shinobi to the will of others? Then we should accept your proposal to take Shikadai Nara to Sunagakure, on the one condition that he be given the free choice of whether or not to leave his hometown to train in a distant land."

"Of course," Gaara replied. "I don't see how it could have been done any other way."

"Then our business here is done." Koharu and Homura stood up and bowed to Gaara. "It was a pleasure speaking with you, Lord Kazekage." Naruto snorted loudly in response to this, which the two elderly members of the Konoha Council conspicuously ignored. "For the sake of both Konoha and Suna, we wish Shikadai Nara the best. If you would excuse us, we will take our leave now."

Koharu and Homura turned and walked out of the meeting room in silence.

It was the best they could get: they did not enjoy the prospect of this 'foreign exchange', but if Lord Hokage truly decided to rashly send Shikadai Nara to Sunagakure under the guise of an ambassador mission, Koharu and Homura would have no say in it and Shikadai would inevitably have to go to Sunagakure. By leaving the decision up to the young boy himself, there was still a chance that he might decline. From what they'd heard of Shikadai's personality, he might decide that going away to train in a foreign land would be too troublesome...right? Right, so they'd cling on to that last hope.

Temari caught that hopeful glint in Koharu's and Homura's eyes right before they exited the room, and she curled her toes in disgust at these old bastards who tried so selfishly to control the shinobi they didn't know well at all. They didn't know Shikadai; if they did, they'd know that their hope was in vain.

Temari wanted Shikadai to go to Sunagakure; she wanted for him this amazing opportunity to be with Uncle Gaara that she knew he needed. She'd fought for Shikadai's right to go to Suna tooth and nail with zest and adrenaline pumping through her veins, and she'd fight this battle forever if she had to. But the war against the Konoha Council had ended; Koharu and Homura had given their blessing for Shikadai's trip and left the room, but with it, they'd taken Temari's fighting spirit as well, leaving in her mouth a bitter dose of reality.

She paid little attention to the antics of the Hokage and her younger brother beside her.

True to his earlier word, Naruto leapt up and swept Gaara into a bone-crushing hug-one that the Kazekage did not return, but did not reject either. Gaara and Naruto once matched each other exactly in height, but nowadays, Naruto was conspicuously taller, of larger stature, more muscular, and better-built than Gaara. Add Gaara's loosely-flowing robes on top of that, and it made the Hokage appear as if he were squeezing a life-sized, emotionless, crimson-headed doll. Shikamaru snickered.

"You were sooooo awesome Gaara!" the blonde man wailed happily into Gaara's ear. "Ha, ha, ha! Did you see the looks of Koharu's and Homura's faces? You had them-literally-stumped! Ah ha ha ha! Man, those old geezers really needed to be put in their place."

Naruto released his "doll", who stepped backward and straightened his slightly tousled robes. Looking down at Gaara, Naruto asked, "Is Sunagakure's Council like this too?"

"Sunagakure's Council consists of twelve members. I would admit that they do not possess the most...tolerant and compatible of...personalities."

"Twelve?" Naruto cried in despair. He pulled Gaara once again into a tight hug, crumpling his newly-straightened robes. "Oh my poor Gaaaaara-how do you survive all those gnarly, creepy nasty old hags!?"

Gaara seemed to ponder this for a moment. "The presence of the Sunagakure Council is not life-threatening. I have an ally in Baki, my sensei, but the others...while they may not always be in agreement with me, they are often afraid to undermine my authority." Still wrapped in Naruto's arms, Gaara looked away with a distant look in his eyes. "Even after all my efforts, it is difficult for them to banish the memory of my old self."

Naruto let go of Gaara and smiled at him before ruffling his red hair. Gaara's eyes went up, following the hand on his head. "Don't you worry about it one bit, Gaara. As your friend I know you're one of the most awesome people in the whole world." A wide grin graced the Hokage's face. "Besides, you'll show 'em! Once you take Shikadai to Suna with you the council will see just what a super-duper-amazingly-fantastic-mind-blowing uncle you are, believe it!"

The smallest of smiles came upon Gaara's thin lips. "Thank you, Naruto," he said softly. "On the other hand, it is a pity to observe that the Konoha Council is unable to appreciate having you as Hokage."

Naruto's smile became even wider, if that were possible. "Aww, thanks, Gaara, my man!" He chuckled. "I wish more people thought like you, hehe."

As an afterthought, Naruto added, "Shikadai's gonna be really happy in Suna, I just know it. Take good care of the kid, okay? Dang, I'll miss him. Heh, I guess Ino-Shika-Chou will have to deal without their 'Shika' for a while."

Normally, this would be the time Temari would step in to ask Naruto to please kindly stop harassing her younger brother before she bashed in his face with an iron fan.

But today, Temari simply looked away disinterestedly, only half listening to the exchange between to the two Kages.

She jumped slightly when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She cursed herself for being so distracted by her thoughts as to have not noticed the presence that had been approaching her from behind.

She spun around, all of her muscles tensed. Shikamaru seemed a little caught off guard by the anxiety exhibited by his wife, and he displayed a sympathetic expression. "Temari, I-"

"Save it," she spat at him, wringing his hand off of her shoulder and stalking away to her brother's side. She and Shikamaru had not fully come to terms yet since their argument at Shikadai's bedside, although Shikamaru had been trying his best to get back on his wife's good side. He had suddenly become very understanding of her point of view and had apologized for his ignorance that night more than once. He was just as, if not more, adamant as Temari to get Shikadai to Suna to train with Gaara. Temari was sure it had something to do with whatever Kankuro and Gaara said to him after dragging him away. Her brothers could be very convincing sometimes. Or threatening.

Shikamaru sighed. "Troublesome..."

I have more to deal with than with Shikamaru's pathetic groveling, Temari thought in spite.

She thought back to Koharu and Homura. In leaving the decision up to Shikadai, they had sealed their fate. And while Temari couldn't be more proud that her baby brother was going to teach her baby boy, she also knew...

That she was going to miss Shikadai like hell.

"Mom? Mom! Mom!"

Temari blinked at the sensation of fingers poking her forehead. Her eyes came into focus to find her son standing over her with an unimpressed expression on his face.

She held herself back from slapping his hand away, for by doing so she risked provoking Shikadai's protective Gold Dust.

Urgh...that's another thing I'll miss...getting to slap Shikadai around all the time. Oh well, I guess Shikamaru's gonna get it twice as bad from now on.

She settled for a glare. "What?" she sharply asked her son.

Shikadai pulled off an even more unimpressed expression. "I could ask you the same. I've been calling you for the last five minutes." He gestured to the place on the table in front of Temari. "I've already finished and you haven't touched your breakfast."

Temari looked down and saw a bowl of porridge in front of her. She realized that she was in her home-Shikamaru had left for work already, and she had been having breakfast with Shikadai. That is, until her attention fled her and she got caught up in her thoughts.

Gaara and Kankuro had returned to Suna a week ago, having only stayed long enough to see Shikadai safely released from the hospital.

"Dammit," she cursed as she shoved a spoonful of now cold porridge into her mouth.

Shikadai looked at his mother critically. "You've been acting weird," he observed. "What were you thinking about?"

"None of your business," Temari snapped.

"Huh, really..." Shikadai mused thoughtfully. "I was wondering, why you haven't been assigned to any missions lately." Shikadai was well aware of his mother's elite status as a kunoichi, and she was usually in high demand for assignments (especially those that required quick and large amounts of destruction). So why had she been home for the past few days, sitting around with a distant look on her face?

"I don't know," she lied. The news of the plan they had for Shikadai hadn't been broken to him yet. "Why d'you ask?"

"It's troublesome to have you around at home all day sulking around," Shikadai answered. Temari seethed; she really wanted to slap him now. "No really, though, I was thinking that I have a right to know if you and dad really went ahead with Uncle Kankuro's advice."

Temari gasped.

"Bye, Kankuro, Bye Gaara. Make sure to write, okay? I'll sure miss my little brothers."

She gave each of her brothers a hug but glared when they offered the same friendly goodbye to Shikamaru.

Her brothers, being as attentive as they were, noticed.

"Sheesh, you guys seriously need to make up," Kankuro complained loudly to Shikamaru and Temari. "This is why I'm never getting married. I'm glad I'm going to back to Suna today; I don't think I can stand another minute of the sexual tension between you two."

Shikamaru's and Temari's reactions were similar, and both involved a lot of red face and spluttering.

"Seriously, just go back home and make out or something. Make Gaara and me another nephew or a niece. Everything will be good in the morning."

Shikamaru was starting to look like a crimson pineapple-strange indeed-and Temari screamed loud enough for all of Konoha to hear, "Kankuro!"

Too amused for his own good, Kankuro covered his ears and smirked, "Ew, save the screaming for the bedroom, sister. Although I should warn you, Shikamaru, this girl is pretty rough around the edges, although I guess you'd know about that better than me."

Kankuro laughed hysterically, Gaara continued standing there like nothing had happened (despite having read Icha-Icha, he still didn't understand such matters), and Shikamaru looked seconds away from having a heart attack and dying.

The blast of wind that hit Kankuro in the face may have been enough to send him all the way back to Suna.

"So? Did you?" Shikadai pressed.

Temari's face was turning crimson. "No!" she spluttered defensively. "As a matter of fact, I did not! Not that it's any of your business, anyways!"

Shikadai raised a skeptical brow and simply replied, "Oh."

Temari had the half the mind to lecture Shikadai about speaking of such indecent things about his own parents, but decided that doing so would make it worse. Maybe it's a good thing he'll be a going away for a while, after all, she thought. Then she shuddered upon realizing that a large portion of his time would be spent with Kankuro, and she wouldn't be there to put either of them in line.

"You're friends invited you to train with them today," she told Shikadai, clearing her throat and changing the subject.

Shikadai's mood darkened at the mention of his "friends". A monster like me doesn't have any friends, he thought, but kept this to himself.

"So what? They don't need me."

Temari looked at Shikadai sternly. "They asked you to be at the training field at 10."

"I don't need them," he retorted.

Shikadai saw Temari close her eyes and expected her to snap them open any minute and yell at him.

Instead, his mother opened her almond-shaped eyes slowly and looked dead straight into his own that made him gulp drily. "You're right. You don't. You don't need me either, or Uncle Kankuro, or Uncle Gaara, or anyone else. You don't need anyone." Temari had considered including Shikamaru in the list, but decided she was still mad enough at him to leave him out of the list for now.

Shikadai's expression turned into one of hurt. "What-? But yes, I do-"

"Anyone could survive in this world all alone, Shikadai. I'm just the same. I don't need my brothers, or my village, or anyone else, either. I don't need you, Shikadai."

Shikadai exhibited his pain at his mother's words unabashedly on his face.

"But, life would be a lot shittier without you." Temari offered. "I'd call it surviving, but it wouldn't really be living, would it?" She smirked a bitter smile.

Shikadai's eyes fell upon hearing his mother's words, and he felt his heart clench with emotion. He would have hugged her, but she really wasn't that type, so silence fell over them.

Until Shikadai opened his mouth again: "But I still don't want to go train-"

"Urgh, Shikadai, just get out of the house," Temari groaned. "I don't care if you go train or not-" Shikadai's eyebrows rose at this-"just leave me alone! I have a mission, and you're disturbing me!"

"A mission? I thought we established that you had none?"

"Well, I've changed my mind, so yes I do have mission."

"You've changed your mind? What? Isn't that up to the Hokage?" Shikadai skeptically asked. "So, your mission. Where to?"

Temari sighed, and looked away, suddenly appearing very tired. She pointed to her chest. "In here."

Shikadai realized she was pointing at her heart.

"Oh," he said.

With that, he wordlessly got up and silently left his mother at the table to her thoughts. After going to his room to slip a couple of kunai and Uncle Gaara's hourglass (he wouldn't step an inch away from his home without it anymore) into his pouch, he padded out of his house.

Temari heard the door to the Nara home slide shut and Shikadai's chakra signature fade away. She allowed her face to fall into her hands she exhaled a deep, long sigh.

She had long ago forgiven her father, Rasa, but she would never forget. While the Fourth Kazekage had redeemed himself during the Fourth Great Shinobi War, a couple minutes of reanimation could not undo fifteen years of Temari's miserable childhood. She drew a fine line between the period of "surviving"-the early years of her life-and "living"-the years after which Gaara changed. That line fell correlated neatly with the time of Rasa's death at the hands of Mizuki's father.

She hadn't wasted her thoughts on her late father for a long time, but now she cursed him. Cursed him for never teaching her how to be woman. How to be a parent. How to be a mother.

She'd ended up teaching herself those things (although in terms of femininity she was less refined than most, despite being the closest thing there was to royalty in Suna). At least Karura had passed down her divine beauty to Temari.

But there was one thing Karura hadn't passed down to Temari, that Rasa had never taught her, and that she had never been able to teach herself:

How to cry.

Shikadai looked down at shinobi sandals, watching as his feet took him farther and farther away from his house.

I want to go home.

He lifted his head in surprise at the sound of the inner voice in his head. Home? We are home! he told it, even though he agreed with the voice and knew he was lying to it.

Homesickness occurred when one was sick for home, and so Shikadai knew for certain that "home" wasn't the Nara house, for even as he slept and ate there he had the feeling of longing in his chest to go to the place he belonged. "Home" wasn't Konoha, since he was in the very village now and still felt homesick. "Home" wasn't where his "friends" were, since he was heading towards them now, and he still felt the symptoms of homesickness.

He groaned as the training field came into view; Temari had told him he could do whatever he liked, but he'd still come here, of all places. He cursed his feet for having a mind of their own and taking him here. How troublesome.

From his position he could see his comrades clustered in the middle of the grassy area, chit-chatting idly, having not started with their training yet. Their parents were also clustered together and chatting off to the side.

He looked at the former group and noted the blonde hair of Boruto, the black hair of Sarada, the pale hair of Inojin, the brown hair of Chouchou, and the indigo hair of-

Himawari?

"Hey Shikadai, you've come!" Sakura Haruno yelled and waved at the youngest Nara. "Where's your mom?"

He continued approaching them at his lethargic pace and, without making eye contact, shrugged.

"Hey, look at me when I talk to you, young man!" Aunt Sakura called.

He glared.

The pink-haired woman sighed. "How have you been? Feeling better?"

I would be, he thought, if I weren't sick of people asking me that.

Sakura scowled. It's been so many days, and he's still acting this way.

Shikadai's eyes flitted over to the Yamanaka couple. He realized Aunt Ino had been staring at him, but she quickly glanced away guiltily when their eyes were about to meet.

He looked to Uncle Chouji and Aunt Karui: both were staring at the ground, and Shikadai had a strong hunch they were doing so just to avoid his eyes.

He rolled his eyes and directed his attention towards the son and daughter of the two respective couples instead.

They'd been teammates for their entire lives, but the concept of them even attempting to work closely together now seemed foreign.

With a serious but unreadable expression, and keeping his eyes focused on theirs, Shikadai walked towards Inojin and Chouchou, who were huddled together.

The distance between them never closed, for with every step forward that Shikadai took, his teammates took an unconscious step backward.

He had no intention to do anything to them. Just your presence is doing this to them, the voice in his mind snorted.

He opened his mouth to say something to them-it'd be the first words they'd share since their return from the mission to Kyokai-but whatever was about to come out of his mouth was quickly knocked out of his mind from the sensation of something soft and warm surrounding his leg. He jumped.

"Hi, Big Brother Shikadai!"

He looked down with a scowl at the little, smiling thing hugging his leg. Himawari's greeting was warm, but it did not warm him, and thus, he did not return it.

Instead, he looked up at the group of adults standing not too far away. "What is she doing here?" he questioned gruffly, pointing at Himawari.

Hinata paled by several shades. Shikadai came to train...? she thought in worry. Why did Temari let him come? How are we going to keep his secret this way?

The only people in Konoha who officially knew about Shikadai's Gold Dust Magnet Release at the present moment were the Hokage, his adviser (Temari didn't count because she was actually a Sunagakure citizen), Sasuke Uchiha, and Hinata Hyuga. Officially, because Hinata was sure Sasuke had relayed the information to Sakura Haruno, and even if he hadn't, Naruto would have told his longtime pink-haired teammate anyway.

Hinata's two longtime friends and teammates had tagged along today, and while Shino Aburame took notice of her sudden panic, Kiba Inuzuka remained oblivious. Instead, he bounded excitedly towards Hinata's little daughter (for whom he had a soft spot), who was stilling clinging lovingly to the Shikamaru's boy.

"Himawari's gonna train with you little brats today!" Kiba exclaimed in excitement. "She may be small, but you better not underestimate her! You better watch out for her freaky Byakugan eyes!" He flashed his canines and Himawari giggled. "Shino and I came to see Hinata's little girl kick yo' asses!"

Suddenly, Kiba's expression darkened and he sniffed the air. He cocked his head and looked at Shikadai strangely. "Hey Nara, you have this metallic smell all over you." He took a deeper whiff. "Yeah, what kind of places you been to lately? You smell like gol-"

In a flash, Hinata was at Kiba's side and pinching his arm painfully. "Yow! What was that for!" the dog man cried, turning to yell at the offender, only to take a double take when he realized it was his gentle teammate Hinata. "Hina-

"All right, everyone, why don't we get started!" Hinata proposed in a voice too high and squeaky, clasping her hands together.

Everyone looked at the Hokage's wife like she'd grown an extra head-except for Sakura, who realized that Hinata was trying to keep Kiba from revealing Shikadai's Gold Dust Magnet Release secret. Well, Hinata had done a swell job. Sakura facepalmed.

Eyes bewildered by her out-of-character behavior continued to stare at the Hyuga woman. Fortunately, Hinata was saved from having to explain herself by another female voice, which was luckily oblivious to the awkward atmosphere at the current moment.

It was Tenten. "Hey, don't start the show yet!" she called, making her way over. "You'll never live it down if you begin without Lee."

Shikadai stiffened at the mention of the weapon mistress's son. Metal Lee... that boy had stubbornness as firm and a skull as thick as one of his mother's fearful steel weapons. And what had he said to me the last time we met?

"Hiyah!"

No, that's not what he said...

"Shikadai! My eternal rival! Henceforth you may hide no longer! Now that you have fully recovered, the time has come where we meet in combat! Defend yourself and your honor, my friend!"

Shikadai whipped around, realizing that it was not his memory talking, but a living, breathing, life-sized, green-clad, fuzzy-browed Metal Lee rapidly approaching him.

"Leaf Hurricane!"

The last time this had happened, Shikadai had waited patiently for his face to be bashed in by Metal Lee's powerful kick. It had only been perchance that Uncle Gaara's sand stood in the way. This time, there was no Uncle Gaara and no sand, but this time, Shikadai certainly was not going to accept defeat before it even happened.

He shifted into a battle stance. His hands began nimbly weaving the hand-signs for his signature jutsu. "Shadow Possesion Jut-"

A high pitched, female scream pierced the air.

The loud, ringing noise was a like a siren, and for a moment Shikadai's brain froze in alarm. Time seemed to stop, and he could almost hear the absence of a clock's ticking.

He turned and saw Himawari's mouth still open from the cry she'd just elicited. Thick veins protruded on her temples and around her eyes, and her startled Byakugan were directed not at Metal Lee, but straight at Shikadai.

She's afraid of you! You're a monster, Shikadai!

"Ack!"

The muffled cry certainly didn't belong to a young female this time, and instead to a struggling shinobi who had just been tackled to the ground. Shikadai was bemused: what were the chances that twice, when he was about to become a pancake under Metal Lee's leg, that someone would intervene? This time not by Uncle Gaara, but by-

His mind did a double take. Aunt Hinata?

The Hyuga woman was standing over the fallen Metal Lee with her palms extended in front of her.

The young Lee looked up at her with wide eyes. "Oh no! I cannot move!"

Shikadai heard the sound of laughing and turned to see Boruto clutching his stomach. He had to admit, even though he had no idea what the hell was going on, the sight of Boruto's mother beating up Rock Lee and Tenten's son was pretty damn funny.

"Oh! Lee..." Hinata cried, trying to come up with a plausible explanation for using her Gentle Fist on the boy. "I-I'm so sorry! I-I acted without thinking...um, you were coming over this way and Himawari was...in the way...and when she screamed I-um, I panicked and thought you were-you were going to hurt her! I panicked and overreacted! Please forgive me!"

"Mrs. Uzumaki! I assure you that I was not about to hurt your daughter! You see, Shikadai and I are declared rivals! I was merely upholding our rivalry!"

"O-oh, I see..." Hinata said. "But could we save that for another day, Lee?" If they fight now, Shikadai's Gold Dust Shield will most definitely be activated！

She nimbly struck several points along Metal Lee's body to allow him regained access to mobility. Before Metal Lee could say another word, Hinata quickly rushed back to her daughter, who was still standing with a shell-shocked face.

"Are you okay, sweetie?" Hinata asked sweetly. "Did Big Brother Lee scare you?"

The young girl shook her head. "N-no, it wasn't him..." she replied. "It was Big Brother Shikadai!" she said, pointing.

Shikadai turned to look at her with a raised brow. "Me?" he asked lowly. I wasn't the one charging towards us a million miles an hour.

"Yeah!" Himawari cried, using exaggerated hand gestures typical of young human beings such as herself. "I saw Big Brother Shikadai's chakra doing weird things! Like, all of sudden there was a lot it surrounding his body! Did you see it, Mommy? And his chakra was all weird and powerful and dangerous! Why did your chakra look like that, Big Brother Shikadai?"

Hinata paled. Himawari had just seen Shikadai's automatic defense. "Himawari, maybe you were just imagining it? Didn't you see that Big Brother Shikadai was about to do his Shadow Possession Jutsu?"

"No!" Himawari protested stubbornly. "That's not what the Shadow Possession Jutsu looks like from the Byakugan! The chakra movements for the Nara Clan's jutsus are very small! Don't you know that, Mommy?"

Shikadai observed their banter and furrowed his brows suspiciously. What did Himawari see?

The truth, was the answer.

Kiba stepped forward. "Actually, Hinata, I have to agree with Himawari. Didn't you sense that-"

In a more forward, stern, and no-nonsense manner than had ever been exhibited by Hinata, she cut in, "No. I'm sure it was just a part of her imagination."

"Mom!" Himawari pouted.

"What are you hiding? Hinata?" Shino stepped forward and asked.

"Hiding?" Hinata stammered, the nervous edge to her voice returning. "I-I'm not hiding anything, Shino...why would you say that?"

"Because, I can tell. Why? Because I have been your teammate for many years and am very familiar with your mannerisms." The Aburame stared down through his thick, darkly-shaded glasses at Hinata's hands, the index fingers of which were pushing themselves together as they often had when she was a girl. "Your fidgeting is a nervous habit-"

Shikadai soon found himself bored with all this idle conversation. You are the one who came here of your own accord, the voice accused.

We came here to train! What the hell are we doing standing around doing nothing, watching Aunt Hinata act like some weirdo! he chimed in himself.

His patience brought to a boil, he set his hungry eyes upon his most viable, helpless target: the youngest Uzumaki. She was watching Aburame-sensei intently as he spoke, but Shikadai didn't give him a chance to finish.

Himawari's high-pitched scream once again curdled through the air and swiftly cut cleanly through Shino Aburame's monotonous rhetoric.

Shikadai roughly snatched her by the arm and held onto her in a headlock, cruelly baring his teeth next to her ear. Himawari trembled violently, whimpering as she was forcefully held captive. All the heads in the training field turned at the spectacle of Himawari being gripped in Shikadai's arms in a manner that was most evidently the opposite of a warm embrace.

Everyone else froze and proceeded as if walking on thin ice: the fragile little girl was under custody of the violent and unstable nephew of the dangerous Kazekage. Any move could prove to be fatal. Boruto, however, was an exception, always the oddball and unpredictable one among a group, as his father had been. "What the hell are you doing?" he bellowed. "Let go of my sister!"

Retaining his tight grip on Himawari and digging his nails into the flesh of her arm (eliciting a wail from the little girl), Shikadai cocked his head at Boruto and in an impassive voice, replied, "To answer your question, I'm training. Isn't that what we came here to do? Your enemy isn't going to wait around and ask 'how are you' in the real world." He pulled Himawari's hair sharply, causing her-and the spectators-to yelp.

"You fucking sick bastard!" Boruto shouted in alarm. "Himawari isn't your enemy, let her go!"

Shikadai tapped his chin in faux contemplation of Boruto's words. "Isn't she?" he asked calmly.

Shikadai made himself Boruto's enemy with those words, and, all thought banished that Shikadai was his friend, Boruto let out a roar and rushed towards his sister's captor, his hands weaving themselves into seals. Hinata was conflicted, but knew that if Boruto attempted to land a hit on Shikadai, nothing good could come out of it. Trying to stop her son, she called out in a strangled voice, "Boruto, stop-"

She needn't have tried, for the scene that beheld her and the rest of group was enough to stop the raging Boruto-and everyone else, for that matter-in his tracks.

Shikadai pulled Himawari's hair even farther back, forcing her head up with one hand and pressing a kunai against her throat with the other. Himawari screamed again, but was promptly silenced when Shikadai delivered one sharp tug to her hair and hissed in her ear, "Shut up."

He turned back to his audience and drank in, with sick pleasure, their horror and terror. A small part of him felt guilty for doing this to the Uzumaki family, but that small part was so small it was utterly excusable. Power was an addictive drug, and the amount power he held over Himawari and everyone else at the moment sent a large dose pumping fire through Shikadai's bloodstream.

All eyes were trained on the sharp knife that glinted against Himawari's exposed neck. Shikadai noted how they were all frozen like statues, and he wanted it to remain this way. "Move," he said slowly, his dark voice taking full command, "and she dies."

Himawari's tears streamed down onto the kunai.

Shikadai looked at it and knew that Himawari's tears would be the only thing staining the knife today; he had no desire for her blood. It was true, as Boruto had said: Himawari wasn't his enemy. He simply took pleasure from the power the current situation lent him. He may have threatened her life, but he'd been lying. Whoever said monsters were honest...?

Himawari's wavering voice reached his ears. "Big B-brother...Shikadai..." she pleaded.

In a voice that was almost sweet and kind, Shikadai replied, "Would you really call someone who would kill you...your big brother?"

"B-big Brother Shikadai...w-wouldn't..."

"You have the Byakugan, don't you...Himawari...? What everybody else sees is just a mirage, but you were able to look inside me, weren't you...Himawari? Tell me...just what did you see?...You saw something, didn't you? The real thing...?" The monster?

"Tell me, Himawari, are you...afraid of me?"

Himawari began to sob in earnest.

"Don't lie...I promise Big Brother won't get mad at you," he reassured.

"Y-y-yes..."

Shikadai maintained the deadlock for several moments longer, relishing in the sound of Himawari's fear and the feeling of her heaving breaths of terror vibrating against his very bones. Presently, he took the kunai away from her neck and released her hair. The young girl collapsed in a sobbing, quaking heap on the ground.

She'd been the pawn in his game and he'd completed his move with her. Now that she was of no further use to him, Shikadai walked away disinterestedly. "I win," he declared, referring to the 'training' session in which he'd successfully held everyone at bay.

He dully noted Hinata and Boruto-the latter too concerned with checking his sister's welfare to pursue her assaulter for the moment-kneeling next to Himawari and cooing words of comfort to her while she continued to weep. The others stood in awestruck silence, still dumb from what had just happened.

Shikadai's thoughts were just beginning to drift when yet another foreign sound brought him back to the concrete world. The sound of clapping, cheering, and whoops of, "Yeah! Way to go, Lord Shikadai!"

Whoa whoa whoa, wait a second.

Lord Shikadai?

Bemused, Shikadai turned to the source of the fanfare, still not quite believing that it was meant for him.

Standing at the edge of the training field and cheering enthusiastically were two adult shinobi. The one on the right had cheek length black hair and eyes of the same color. The one on the left wore a white turban, his face framed by flaps of white cloth. The bundles both of them carried on their backs made it obvious where they were from, and the shining plates of metal that adorned their foreheads proved it further.

Suna ninja.

Their excitement seemed to grow tenfold when they noticed Shikadai was looking at them. Giddily, they rushed over to Shikadai's side, pulling him into warm handshakes. "You were so amazing, Lord Shikadai! You're so strong and powerful and smart, just like Lord Gaara!"

Aunt Sakura's loud voice cut through. "Oi, you two Suna ninja! How could you call that amazing? What Shikadai did was just brutal! You don't do that to your comrades!"

The one with the black hair cocked his head. "Do what? I didn't see Lord Shikadai do anything?"

"Right," the turbaned one agreed, "I just saw him training with his teammates." He turned away from Sakura and addressed Shikadai again. "Lord Shikadai, you are strong and powerful and smart like Lord Gaara! You beat them using manipulation alone and not even a little bit of chakra!"

"Don't encourage him!" Sakura screamed. "Training is supposed to practice, and for all we know Shikadai could have hurt Himawari! How could you call that training?"

"Even unorthodox methods contribute towards a victory! In Suna, we take training very seriously-"

"We take training in Konoha very seriously too, thank you very much," Sakura argued back. "I don't know what kind of training methods Gaara puts you people through in Suna, but this isn't a matter of-"

The black-haired one piped up again, more serious this time, while the turbaned one glared at Sakura for failing to use an honorific in front of his beloved Kazekage's name. "When we were in the Suna Academy as kids, the Fourth Kazekage was still in power, remember?" he said, addressing his teammate. "The Fourth Kazekage despised weakness, so to pass shinobi graduation, we had to kill the shinobi in our class. I think his name was Teiru..."

Shikadai had a flashback to what Ryomen had said about the Fourth Kazekage. These two Suna ninja were a far cry from what Ryomen had been, so it was a surprise to Shikadai that none of them seemed to have anything favorable to say about Suna's late Kage. Just who was that guy?

Sakura had stiffened in silence at the morose anecdote, and the turbaned ninja awkwardly scratched the back of his head and said, "Yeah, so that's what we call brutal..."

Promptly, the two ninja's somber mood was flicked off and their fanboying mode was turned on again. "But Lord Shikadai! I assure you that since Lord Gaara took power, Suna has been nothing like that! Sunagakure is now the best shinobi village ever because of everything Lord Kazekage has done!"

The two continued to blabber on about "Lord Gaara" this, "Lord Gaara" that, and as endearing their words sounded to Shikadai, his bemusement got the better of him and he turned to the two, clearing his throat and questioning, "Who are you two?"

The Suna shinobi promptly halted his gushing. "Ah, how silly of us to forget to introduce ourselves!" the turbaned one exclaimed. "I'm Korobi."

"I'm Yaoki, and we're friends of Lord Gaara's!"

Behind him, Shikadai could hear Sarada snickering-the almighty Kazekage had these two dorks for friends?

Shikadai, on the other hand, did not find it so amusing. Uncle Gaara was an introverted person, at most, and Shikadai rarely heard the man speak of his friends at all, outside of Konoha 12, of course. Then again, Shikadai realized, he'd never been in Sunagakure to meet Uncle Gaara's native friends, had he any.

Shikadai remembered the rather cold, hostile reception members of Konoha 12-Gaara's Leaf "friends"-had given the Kazekage during the redheaded leader's last visit. The man's nephew found he much preferred the warm attitude of admiration displayed by Gaara's Sand friends Yaoki and Korobi, and dorks or not, Shikadai found himself liking them already.

"Really? You're Uncle Gaara's friends?!"

"Yeah! We met him many years ago when we were lucky enough to be assigned on a mission with him! It was a joint mission with Konohagakure...of course, Lord Gaara was the most awesome ninja out of all of us."

It suddenly struck Sakura that she'd met Yaoki and Korobi before. So many years ago...on that mission against bandits with Gaara...She scowled at the fact that Yaoki and Korobi claimed that Gaara was more awesome than all the others of the group, of which she was a part.

"We weren't so sure about him at first, but he turned out to be a good guy!" Yaoki exclaimed. "Lord Gaara's loyal and protective of his friends, to say a few...we've been friends ever since!"

From somewhere behind Shikadai, Kiba snorted. "Dudes...sorry to disappoint you, but I think you've got it all wrong. I think you're just a couple of hopefuls wanting to be the Kazekage's friends, but you don't just become friends with someone like him after doing one mission with him."

"No," Korobi disagreed. Neither he nor Yaoki had even wanted to be Gaara's friends in the first place; they'd been terrified of him. Fate just played its part, however. "On the mission, we called Lord Gaara our friend, and then he asked us to say it again and then he..." Korobi started sniffing emotionally.

Recalling the story seemed to have the same touching effect on Yaoki, who finished with tears in his eyes, "Lord Gaara, he...smiled."

Behind him, Shikadai heard Team Konohamaru burst into laughter. Boruto, less frazzled from the earlier turn of events, snickered, "He smiled? What's the big deal about that?"

But for Shikadai, it was a big deal. He gaped. "Uncle Gaara smiled?"

Yaoki and Korobi dabbed their eyes. "I know! I'm sorry, I get so emotional every time I think about it," Yaoki smiled.

"It's no problem, I understand..." Shikadai assured. Sabaku no Gaara smiling was plenty to get emotional about.

Inner Sakura punched the air. Now he acts all friendly and normal with a bunch of foreign strangers! Why can't Shikadai trust us?

"Um...Yaoki and Korobi...sirs?" It was Hinata's timid voice. They turned to look at her, and she still had Himawari wrapped around her arms. "Could you tell us...what you're doing here? In Konoha?"

"We're here to deliver a message!" Korobi replied.

"Then, uh...shouldn't you have reported it to the Hokage?" Hinata wondered if Naruto knew about the arrival of these two odd Suna ninja, and what message they had come to Konoha for.

Yaoki laughed and waved her off. "The Hokage already knows we're here! The message isn't for him, however; the message is from Lord Gaara to Lord Shikadai."

Oh, so that's what they're here for...Hinata thought. I wonder how Shikadai will react.

Shikadai looked up at the two Suna shinobi, surprise evident in his eyes. Uncle Gaara asked them to come all the way here...for me?

Korobi fiddled inside the bundle on his back and fished out a scroll tied neatly with a black ribbon and sealed with the crimson seal of the Sunagakure Kazekage.

Shikadai accepted the scroll wordlessly, his heart pounding in his ears. What message could Uncle Gaara have for him?

The scroll was light but felt significant in Shikadai's hand, as if it had some precious value. He felt warmth through it; did this scroll have Uncle Gaara's love inside?

His fingers hovered over the black ribbon that tied the scroll together. He realized that the thin piece of ebony cloth was a high-quality satin. Nothing less from the Kazekage, of course, he mused, reminded constantly of his uncle's high importance. With one quick pluck, he dislodged the ribbon that kept his Uncle Gaara's love and message intact, feeling the strange desire to use it to tie up his hair. Then he remembered that he was a freaking man, and that men didn't use satin ribbons of any kind to tie up their hair, even if it was black. He shoved the ribbon in his pocket to save it for his mom, even though his mother could be more of a man than he was, at times, and he wasn't sure how a single satin ribbon would be able to accessorize Temari's four ponytails. Never mind, he thought. The inner voice chastised alongside him: you freaking weirdo, overcontemplating damn ribbons when you've got a letter from the Kazekage.

Hastily, he opened the scroll and greeted a short message in the neatest cursive handwriting he had ever encountered.

"Lord Gaara never handwrites his letters; he's too busy! You must be really important to him for him to do that, he's never done anything this personal before," Yaoki commented.

"But that's a given," Korobi added.

The letter read:

Shikadai Nara:

The Councils of Sunagakure and Konohagakure have jointly endorsed the Konoha-Suna Shinobi Exchange Program, in which shinobi of either village will stay in the other to train with a designated master for the sake of developing skills and strengthening the alliance.

On account of your skills and affiliation with both villages, you have been selected to pioneer this program. Sunagakure extends its welcome for you to make this village your second home and to study under the tutelage of the Fifth Kazekage.

Somehow, Shikadai knew that there was no Konoha-Suna Shinobi Exchange Program; or rather, there was, but it was created for his sake. Uncalled tears sprung to his eyes.

We propose your extended stay in the village of Sunagakure, where you will be housed in the Kazekage Quarters. Two chunin from our village will travel to Konohagakure seven days from your reception of this letter in order to receive your acceptance or rejection of our invitation. Notify them of your decision, and should you desire and accept our proposal, they shall escort you home.

We look forward to working closely with you.

Best regards,

SABAKU NO GAARA

Fifth Kazekage of Sunagakure

The letter ended, but the blood that was pumping in Shikadai's remained no less thundering. The message was, unsurprisingly, formal, for all outgoing mail from the Kazekage had to be reviewed by his Council, especially for such a sensitive issue as a shinobi exchange, but even within its detached and political context, Shikadai could sense bits of his Uncle Gaara's wise voice in it. He noted how he written, "they shall escort you home."

Home. Sunagakure.

The meaning of Uncle Gaara's message came crashing down upon him.

"I-is this...r-real?" Shikadai asked Yaoki and Korobi shakily.

"Of course it is!" Korobi squealed in excitement. "This is so exciting, Lord Shikadai! And I'll have you know that Lord Gaara has never accepted students, not since becoming Kazekage!"

Ino Yamanaka, the Konoha busybody, perked her ears up at this. "The Kazekage is taking in a student? When? Who?" she demanded, making her way over.

Shikadai ignored her, his hands tightening around the paper that held Uncle Gaara's neat handwriting.

Yaoki winked at him. "Lord Kazekage even told us to personally tell you that he, the Hokage, Lady Temari, and Shikamaru Nara had already taken care of the 'troublesome' details, so you would only have to worry about saying yes or no and the voyage there!"

So Mom knew. He now understood on what "mission" Temari had embarked this morning.

"And Lord Kankuro said if you came to Suna he'd make you a life-sized version of your favorite puppet!" Korobi exclaimed.

Shikadai wondered which puppet Uncle Kankuro meant. "You know Uncle Kankuro too?"

"Oh my god, he called him Uncle Kankuro!" Yaoki screamed.

"Of course he did, you dimwit, he's Lord Kankuro's and Lord Gaara's nephew, after all," Korobi stated. The declaration of this fact only seemed to make the two desert nin more excited.

Finally they calmed down. "Yes, of course we know Lord Kankuro as well! To know one of the beloved Sand Siblings is to know all of them! The famous Three Sand Siblings always work as one!"

Shikadai thought about this and remembered his inexplicable feeling of homesickness from this morning. His heart went out to his mother and he wondered how it must feel for her.

Then he suddenly realized that, talking to Yaoki and Korobi, that ache in his heart seemed to diminish.

"So for how long is Sunagakure going to be my second home?"

"From the last I heard, the Sunagakure Council had no fixed length of time, but I believe they would recommend anywhere around a year," Yaoki replied. "But don't get us wrong, Shikadai; that's just what the Council says. Sunagakure will always be your second home. We extend our welcome for you indefinitely."

Shikadai opened his mouth to answer but was interrupted by a dramatically loud female scream from behind him. He turned around to look at the source, despite already knowing what, or who, it was.

Ino gestured wildly at the letter in Shikadai's hands. He realized she'd read it over his shoulder and he scowled. "The Kazekage wants you to go to Suna to train with him?" she shrieked.

For a split second, Shikadai thought Ino was expressing enthusiasm on his behalf. You naive brat, haven't you learned anything at all? the inner voice mocked him.

"Shikadai, you can't possibly be thinking of going to Suna!" she yelled. He blatantly covered his years, but she kept going. "You need your team here! In Konoha! Have you forgotten that you're part of Team Ino-Shika-Chou? You need Inojin and Chouchou! God, why didn't Shikamaru tell me anything?

"You're a Konoha shinobi, for crying out loud. And not just anyone; you're a Nara! No one can teach you the Nara Clan techniques better than your father, and no one can teach you the Ino-Shika-Chou combination techniques better than us!'

Shikadai decided that it would be too troublesome to point out to Ino that she sounded more like she was convincing herself than anything. She wouldn't have launched into such a tirade had she not believed he would actually consider leaving.

Ino bent down and through an arm around Shikadai's shoulders. "Shikadai would never leave us, right Shikadai? You love us too much?" The boy remained motionless. Then Ino crossed the line. "I mean, what could that god-forsaken, hot, dry village like Suna possibly have to offer you-"

With double the necessary force, Shikadai tore Ino's arms from around his shoulder, vengefully twisting her arm in the process. "Ow!" the woman cried. "What the hell was that for?" Ino had worked with Shikadai's father for many, many years, and the boy looked so much like Shikamaru that sometimes she expected him to react in the same way as the older Nara. Well, Shikadai used to be more like Shikamaru. That was obviously no longer the case.

"Did I ask for your opinion? Stupid, troublesome woman?" he spat venomously. Ino tried to look indignant, but a slight bit of fear radiated from her eyes at the dramatic turnaround in Shikadai's attitude.

From a distance, Sai thought, this is bad.

"I was just-"

"No, you were just sticking your nose into business that wasn't your own, just like always," Shikadai cut her off. He shoved the letter into her face. "This letter is from Uncle Gaara to me. Do you see your name on it anywhere, Ino Yamanaka?"

Ino's face scrunched up. Shikadai had never so blatantly called her by her name before. "How dare you-"

"No, how dare you read my letter and tell me how to feel about it? You don't fucking know me, and this is none of your goddamn business." He paused briefly, a bit amazed at the profanities he didn't know he possessed in his arsenal.

"Of course it's my business, Shikadai!" Ino replied heatedly, determined to get the last word even though she felt shocked and a little hurt at the way her teammate's son was treating her. "I'm your-"

"You're my what? Don't you dare finish that statement, Yamanaka, especially after what you dared say about Uncle Gaara's country. And Inojin told me you say bad things about Uncle Gaara too, so don't try to come up with any other lies." Shikadai seethed, pointing his kunai in her direction, only just realizing that he hadn't put it away since holding Himawari hostage.

Inojin gulped. Shit.

He huffed and shoved the kunai back into his couch, turning away from his teammate's mother with a look of disgust and utter disdain on his face. "You're nothing but trouble to me. I don't need you."

He'd told his mother that morning that he didn't need his friends and she'd responded by saying she didn't need him but life would be a lot shittier without him. That she wouldn't really be living at all. He'd tried to open his mind to Aunt Ino and the others on account of his mother's words, but now he found his mind completely blocked. He would not refute his statement. He didn't need them. Before, life had indeed been less shitty with them-Inojin, Chouchou, and the rest of them. But now, they were sucking the life out of him.

Ino backed away, tears stinging in her eyes. This isn't the end of our discussion, she silently promised Shikadai, but right now she needed to back off and tend to her wounds. Shikadai's words had cut deep, and Ino couldn't be consoled by the notion that he probably didn't mean it, because chances were that he probably did.

Shikadai turned away from the people he didn't need, wondering why they were trying so hard. These friends and comrades he had grown up with-the Konoha 12 and the shinobi who called themselves his teammates-acted almost as if they needed him, but Shikadai knew better.

You're a monster after all, the voice told him. They think they need you because you covered yourself with a human guise for your whole life. But we tore away that fucking layer of fakeness. They're going to see what you really are, just like Himawari did, and then they won't need you anymore. They won't even want you.

It should have been a frightening notion-that the people who had loved and cared for him for his whole life should throw him away. But he felt nothing. I'm throwing them away, he told himself. Or perhaps I already have. But then he suddenly felt a pang as he wondered whether anyone would be willing to call a monster such as himself "Lord Shikadai". Would Sunagakure really want me...?

He willed himself to be brave, reminding himself that Uncle Gaara had told him that he believed in him. Boldly, he looked into Yaoki's and Korobi's eyes. They had seen his crueler side through his display towards Aunt Ino, and they hadn't even seen everything yet.

He expected to see disgust in theirs eyes. Fear, repulsion. But search as he might, he found nothing but a look of seriousness and genuine concern in their eyes, and that was quickly replaced with fondness that lit up their faces when they saw their Lord Shikadai look at them. It was as if the nephew of their beloved friend and Kazekage was a light that lit up their beings.

He didn't know how he would feel towards these two charismatic Suna nin, but when looked into their eyes and found affection there, he was possessed by a sudden surge of possessiveness. These were Uncle Gaara's friends; now he wanted to make them his. And he wasn't about to share them with the audience of surrounding them now, so he offered-

"Hey, Yaoki and Korobi, right? I like you guys. Let's go somewhere where we can talk without all these troublesome people."

"All these troublesome people-hey! Watch your mouth, Nara! That was a damn low blow!" Boruto, still angry at his friend, shouted at Shikadai. The Nara started walking away from the training field without paying the Uzumaki any regard. "Don't walk away from me, you bastard! I'm not finished with you yet!" Shikadai ignored him.

"Boruto, calm-" Hinata began.

Boruto eyed the ground beside him and noticed a stone the size of his fist. Swiftly, he bent down to pick it up and hurled it, aiming for the Nara heir's head.

All the blood that remained in Hinata's face drained away. Oh no, this time, it's too late, Shikadai's Automatic Defence is going to-

THUNK

Shikadai turned in surprise at the sound of metal hitting something hard not too far behind his head.

Yaoki and Korobi were standing in defensive, protective stances over Shikadai. Yaoki brandished a kunai he'd just used to deflect the rock Boruto'd thrown.

"How dare you try to hurt Lord Shikadai?!" Korobi asked, aghast.

"Stop calling that asshole Lord Shikadai!" Boruto countered. "It's so annoying and he doesn't deserve it!"

"How could you say that?" Yaoki cried. "He is the nephew of Lord Kazekage-he deserves nothing less!"

"Hell with that! He's not even from Suna!"

"Origin isn't significant to us! No matter what you say, Lord Shikadai will still be one of Sunagakure's most important youths."

Shikadai turned around and away from Boruto and the bickering sand nins, hiding the genuine smile that was playing on his lips.

Without another word, he began walking away, knowing full well that he didn't have to look to make sure that Yaoki and Korobi would follow him.

Inojin, Chouchou, Boruto, Himawari, Lee, and the present members of Konoha 12 watched in silent awe at the retreating backs of "Suna's most important youth" and the two enthusiastic shinobi.

Unbidden, Metal Lee pumped his fists into the air and called out, "My rival is most admirable! He has been invited to train with a exceptional shinobi in a foreign village in order to improve his skills and strengthen the Leaf's international alliances for the sake of his village! I must train twice as hard in order to keep up with him! Perhaps, if I burn with enough of the energy of youth, I will be invited to train in a foreign village as well!"

"That's the spirit, my son!" Rock Lee encouraged.

The others watched the Lees' display lamely. "Um...so, are we going to train...?" Himawari asked timidly.

Boruto looked at his little sister and shrugged, before throwing his hands into the air and complaining loudly, "How come no one calls me Lord Boruto?"

---

"No, Lord Shikadai!"

Shikadai held three plump, round sticks of tasty sweets in his hand. "You don't want dango?"

"No-I mean-yes-but, we can't possibly allow you to pay for our share! We should be the ones-"

Shikadai rolled his eyes at Yaoki's and Korobi's antics. "Dudes, stop being so troublesome. What part of 'it's my treat' do you not understand?"

Yaoki and Korobi fumbled for words. "At least allow us to pay our share-in all honesty we would should be the ones treating you-we couldn't let the Kazekage's nephew-spend on us-"

"Look, it's my money, and I'll do with with my money whatever the hell I want regardless of what you say." He held out their dango sticks to them. "And if I want to use it to buy you two dango, then that's sure what I'm going to do. If you insist on paying, you can go ahead and get yourselves another serving or two, but that isn't going to get you out of my treat."

Gratefulness shimmered in their eyes as Yaoki and Korobi accepted the desserts from Shikadai, who again rolled his eyes.

"You're the best, Lord Shikadai!" they cried, grinning widely.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Troublesome." He waved them off, secretly pleased at himself for having pleased his two new Suna friends.

Shikadai watched as the two Suna nin happily lapped up their dango. "So, who are the two chunin coming in a week?"

"Their names are Shinchi and Icho," Korobi replied. "They're two of the most talented young shinobi in Suna and they're obvious favorites of the Kazekage. It's no surprise he sent them for this mission."

"Most shinobi are assigned to squads of three, but Shinchi and Icho have been a pair for as long as anyone can remember, so Lord Gaara decided to keep them that way." Yaoki added.

Shinchi and Icho...where had heard of them before? Oh right, Shikadai remembered, they were the two shinobi who had rescued Inojin, Chouchou, and Mirai from the mission to hell last week. Shikadai had met them briefly when they'd come to visit him at the hospital, but he'd been disinterested at the time and the only bell in his head that the names of those two rang at the moment was that the kunoichi seemed as troublesome as his mother.

He absently wrapped his tongue around the sticky, sugary rice ball, inwardly marveling at how Yaoki and Korobi were voluntarily-if not more than willingly-spending time in the presence of someone like him.

He suddenly remembered his own Uncle Gaara's similar expression of surprise when Shikadai suggested to spend the day with him when he'd visited Konoha last...how his friends and acquaintances separated themselves form Uncle Gaara, how Uncle Gaara separated himself from the rest of the human race...

"Hey Yaoki, Korobi..." he began thoughtfully. "What do you think of Uncle Gaara...?"

The two looked at the Nara boy in his surprise. There was silence for a moment and Shikadai wondered what their answer was that required so much contemplation.

But when they spoke, there was no hint of contemplation in their voices, simply definitive finality. Yaoki spoke first: "He is the single best thing that has ever happened in our lives, Lord Shikadai. The best thing that has ever happened to all of Sunagakure. Without him, there would be no Sunagakure." Hadn't Shikadai's mother told him something similar once? "Suna's now one of the, if not the, best ninja village in the whole world now! We remember how Sunagakure was like before Lord Gaara became Kazekage...so...but he was like a light that brought Sunagakure out of the darkness..."

"Lord Gaara is different than everybody else...better," Korobi continued. "When he first became Kazekage a lot of people weren't happy about it." Shikadai looked up in surprise. "He was like...the sun rising over a village that had been plagued with for too long. So a lot of people were blinded by the brightness and blamed Lord Gaara for everything. Of course, they were just a bunch of fools who couldn't recognize him as something that was essential for their survival and someone who gave them worth." Korobi spoke with undiluted admiration.

"You should have seen how Sunagakure was like before Lord Gaara became Kazekage-well no, you shouldn't, because it was pretty bad. It was hard not to find chaos and animosity everywhere." Yaoki shuddered. "You could hardly call it a shinobi village at all. But Sunagakure was reborn when Lord Gaara became Kazekage...you know, Suna is so close-knit now that it's nothing like a hidden village with several hundred thousand citizens at all, it's more like one living breathing organism! And if that were the case, Lord Gaara would be, like, the brain, or something."

"No, I'm pretty sure Lord Gaara would be the heart," Korobi countered with confidence.

"No, he'd be both!"

"No, I think Sunagakure is a living creature of its own right, and then Lord Gaara is like its, super protective and loving parent."

Shikadai decided to cut in before Yaoki and Korobi could start to unwittingly corrupt his mind by comparing Uncle Gaara to more uncanny things. "You guys are lucky to be part of it."

Yaoki and Korobi laughed at it him. "Don't say that, Lord Shikadai!" Korobi told him. "You're a part of it too!"

"But I've never even been to Sunagakure."

"But you will soon!" Yaoki cried excitedly, seemingly having no doubt that Shikadai would choose to go to Suna by the week's end. "Besides, that doesn't matter. Where you are physically doesn't matter, it's where you are in here." He patted his hand over his heart. "And Lord Shikadai, I'm pretty sure you're in the hearts of everyone in Sunagakure, just like Lord Gaara is!"

Shikadai swallowed back his tears. "I...didn't even know."

"Of course, it's all thanks to Lord Gaara!"

Here goes the fanboying again.

"I love him so much, I even got a charm with a lock of his hair!" Yaoki held out a crimson object proudly.

"You dummy," Korobi laughed at him. "Those are mass-produced by Lord Gaara's fan club! Lord Gaara may have a head full of very abundant and attractive hair, but it's not possible for even him to have so much as the fan club makes."

Shikadai sweatdropped-it wasn't that it wasn't heartwarming that Yaoki and Korobi were so enthusiastic over the Kazekage, but even Shikadai's opinion they were overdoing it. Shikadai might have deduced that they were gay for Gaara if not for the fact that his sharp and analytical eye had caught that none of their mannerisms suggested it-not that he would have any problems if they indeed "swung that way". He had been raised to never, ever discriminate against anyone for any reasons at all-his mother was especially adamant about this. Still, it would be awkward to be on a casual outing for dango with two men who lusted after his uncle's "very abundant and attractive hair".

A thought suddenly came to Shikadai's mind-if the male citizens of Sunagakure acted this way already, what were the female fangirls of Sabaku no Gaara like...?

He shook that potentially scary thought from his head.

"What's Sunagakure like?" he asked.

"Well, for the weather, it's dry and hot during the day and dry and cold during the night," Korobi answered. "The buildings in Suna are mostly made out of sandstone, since we have more than enough of it...concrete buildings are sprouting up here and there, though. Wood isn't very common there for obvious reasons. Suna used to look really bare, but Lord Gaara has been promoting culture and the arts since the end of the war. Murals are really popular in Suna now since the paint looks very nice on the sandstone. The buildings in Suna all have a slightly sparkly look to them because they're made out of sand, and add the mural art on top of that, and you get a city full of vividly, shining colors."

"You should see the city at sunset or sunrise," Yaoki commented, practically glowing with national pride. "The whole city looks like it's made out of gold."

"Suna isn't like Konoha," Korobi continued. "Konoha is a sprawling city; it's concentrated in the center and then it thins out. But Sunagakure has very well defined parameters, and while we often expand the city walls there's nothing much outside of that. The desert around Suna is as much a part of the village as the forests here are a part of Konoha, if not more so; we don't live in the desert, we live the desert.. From the Suna city walls, you can look out into the desert and see an endless horizon and an endless sky. On most days there isn't a single speck of cloud, and the sky is a very, very beautiful blue."

Shikadai's former pastime had been cloud watching, but this barely raised a concern in his hand at the moment. He found himself quick to ask, "But there are stars? At night?"

Yaoki's and Korobi's eyes brightened. "Oh yes," Yaoki replied. At night, there are more stars than there is sand."

"Whoa," Shikadai breathed.

"But that's not the best part," Yaoki went on. "Sunagakure's moon is what's most amazing."

"The moon?"

"Yes. It's hard to explain...but the moon always feels closer in Suna than anywhere else in the moon. It's the same moon that the whole world sees in its night skies, but in Suna, that moon is special because because the people of Suna all look at it and give the moon a part of their soul, and the moon gives us part of its soul. The moon is a part of every person in Suna, every person in Suna is a part of the moon."

The description painted a beautiful picture in Shikadai's mind. He yearned to go the place where the starry sky and moon of the heavens were closer.

"How about the people?" he asked.

The two Suna ninja smiled. "If you like us, then you'd like them," Korobi smiled. "They're very unique. Sunagakure isn't nearly as diverse as Konoha, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. We don't have many immigrants at all, because Sunagakure isn't an easy place to live, nor is it really possible to learn. Sunan people are very adaptable, but it's hard for outsiders to adapt to Suna. We're very tolerant of other peoples, but the sense of Sunagakure identity is very strong, perhaps more so than for any other village. There's a saying that goes something like, you can't become Sunan because you have to be born Sunan. The desert will eject anyone who doesn't belong, and the only way you can survive there is to have Sunan blood."

"Sounds like I'll have a hard time there."

Yaoki laughed, waving Shikadai off. "Nonsense, Lord Shikadai! You have Suna blood, not to mention from Sunagakure's most powerful bloodline."

"There's something that all people of Suna have in common," Korobi told Shikadai. "We all share loyalty and pride for our home country and love for our great Kazekage. We all have the same unwavering faith in Lord Gaara, and he often tells us that the bonds between us make us one ane the same because we all share his-Sunagakure's-great dream."

"Sunagakure's great dream? And what's that?" Shimada asked.

"There isn't one single definition for Sunagakure's dream. In essence, Lord Gaara lets us decide what that dream is."

"So really, Sunagakure's dream is a combination of the dreams of all our people," Yaoki finished.

Shikadai became increasingly confused. He hadn't thought that the seemingly cluelesss Yaoki and Korobi were capable of expressing such philosophical concepts. When he'd asked the question, Shikadai had expected a simple reply in return. If he'd asked any Leaf shinobi what Konoha villagers were like, he doubted he'd have received an answer like these Suna nin's. He guessed this was the difference between having Uncle Gaara as opposed to Uncle Naruto as a Kage.

"But I thought you said all the people of Sunagakure share the same dream..."

Yaoki and Korobi smiled at him as if he had just made a rather naïve statement. "That's right. So just what is Sunagakure's dream? It's not what the government wants, or what the Council or the Elders want, and it's not even what the Kage personally wants. It's what the people want, 'cause without the people there'd be no Suna!" Yaoki said.

"So you see," said Korobi, "Sunagakure's dream is made of the individual dreams of the its citizens, collectively."

"How is it possible to maintain unity that way?" Shikadai questioned.

"It's completely possible," Korobi answered. "According to Lord Gaara, individuality is key to having unity among a people."

Shikadai tried hard to wrap his mind around Uncle Gaara's ideology. It sonded decent—great, really—but was it really possible? As of late, Shikadai seemed to have been butting heads with the rest of Konoha, even though they claimed wish him well. If he maintained aspects of his current "individuality", how in the world was Konoha going to remain united? How in the world would his own dream—whatever the hell that was-lie in tandem with Konoha's? How did that work in Suna? "Wouldn't certain individuals...I dunno...clash? I mean, everyone can't possibly just agree with each other and get along perfectly. That would be like asking for utopia."

Yaoki nodded his assent. "Suna is by no means utopia, if that's what you're asking. It'd be foolish to think so. There's no such thing as perfection."

It was said with such calmness, such acceptance, that Shikadai truly realized, despite their eccentric quirks, Yaoki and Korobi really did deserve more credit than they were given.

"Lord Gaara insists that the first thing a shinobi—or anyone, for that matter—should learn is acceptance. Unconditional acceptance for your own self and for your comrades, acquaintances, and fellow villagers. Hard work is important, but love and fraternity isn't something anyone should have to work for. Anyone deserves it just for being born!" Yaoki said. "Lord Gaara wants more than anything for his people to create strong bonds with one another. The people we encounter in our lives have the ability to change or fate, and Lord Gaara wants it to be for the better. Once you've created bonds with your comrades, they become precious to you and a part of your dreams, and you become a part of theirs."

"Everyone may have their own unique dream," Korobi continued to explain, "but if they share strong bonds with their precious people, then their dreams will be interwoven some way or another. Everyone in Suna is connected in this manner."

"Lord Gaara likes to call each person in Suna a grain of sand," explained Yaoki. Shikadai raised a brow. "I know that sounds a little silly-"

"-Nothing Lord Gaara says is silly-" Korobi interjected-

"-because grains of sands are so insignificant, but Lord Gaara reminded us that a single speck of sand is the basic unit of a desert like the Wind Country. You can't break a desert down into anything more or less, unlike the forest which you can separate into the trees and the soil and the rocks and all that. In the desert there's just sand...and every grain of it is essential, because if it isn't you might as well have no sand at all and then you'd have no desert..."

"A single grain of sand can be beautiful in its own right and have its own shape and color. But it you put a lot of single beautiful and unique grains of sand together you can get something even more beautiful!" Korobi finished.

"Wow..." Shikadai breathed, a bit speechless.

Yet another troublesome thought came to his restless mind. "What happens if someone's not worthy of being of grain of sand?"

"Anyone can be worthy," Yaoki argued optimistically.

"No," Shikadai insisted firmly, surprising both Yaoki and Korobi. "What do you do when someone is different? And by that, I mean that-that person's bonds with his comrades have broken? Or if he was unable to forge them in the first place? What does the desert do to a grain of sand that goes against its nature? What if that grain of sand doesn't want to be part of the desert? What if that grain of sand...hates the desert? What happens to those freaks of nature? What if a grain of sand turns against the desert and the dreams of the rest of the sand? What if the grain of sand's dream goes against the desert's? What if the grain of sand's dream would...destroy the desert? What if-"

"Lord Shikadai!" Korobi cried out in surprise. "Please, forgive me interrupting, but your curiosity amazes me! Not to mention your capability of thinking of such dilemmas...certainly, mistakes happen, even in Sunagakure, but-why are you-of all people-so worried?"

"Don't be such a worrywart, Lord Shikadai!" Yaoki insisted.

"I know, I know, but-I was just-thinking..." Shikadai sighed. He looked Yaoki and Korobi in the eye seriously. "What if I were a bad person?" he asked lowly.

The two Suna nin looked at him incredulously before bursting out into laughter. "Lord Shikadai, a bad person?" Korobi cried, wiping a tear of mirth from his eye. "Why, that's just-"

"Stop laughing," Shikadai murmured a bit angrily, and the two immediately did so. "I'm serious. You guys like me, right?"

They nodded fervently. "You're Lord Kazekage's nephew, so you're practically royalty to us-in a good way, of course!"

"Yeah-Suna's little prince!"

"So you consider me to be a part of Suna," Shikadai continued, silently thanking them for their 'Suna's little prince' comment. "But just say, what if I had done something that...went against your...and Sunagakure's values? What would you think of me then?" He gulped. "What if I were to commit some crime and do something that you would normally hate? If I did something...vile and...bad?" It's too late for that! the voice growled in his head. You've already done something vile and bad...in fact, you are vile and bad. Shikadai swallowed thickly. "Would you...hate me?"

Shikadai knew that had he posed this question to his family, the answer would have been no, but that was a given, since they shared the same blood. To his own surprise, he could confidently pose this question to the friends he'd grown up with and get yes for an answer and walk away unruffled. But for some reason, Shikadai cared more than he dared admit what Yaoki and Korobi-these two Suna nin he'd only known for an hour or so, whose appearances and behavior betrayed their inner wisdom-would think.

Yaoki and Korobi blinked at Shikadai's questions. They realized the gravity and sincere concern with which Shikadai asked them. They did not, however, grow suspicious at the implications of his questions, instead taking them unquestionably to heart and answering them sincerely.

"Lord Shikadai," Yaoki responded kindly, using a tone of voice used by a big brother to a beloved younger sibling. "You must understand that what we feel for you is what we feel because of who you are. You are the only one who can truly define who you really are, but it is not our place to decide that for you. So we love you for being Lord Shikadai, I guess you could say...unconditionally. No matter what you may choose to be."

"There is a difference between a crime and its offender, Lord Shikadai," Korobi added.

Shikadai furrowed his brows. "So you'd just let me get away with it-"

"Oh no, no," Korobi laughed. "Every action comes with a consequence. That's inevitable for a successful society to function. But no matter what we have to do to a person so they may pay for their mistakes, that is entirely different from how we actually view that person."

"Sometimes that's what really counts," Yaoki quipped.

"Exactly," Korobi continued. "So first, we have to accept whatever it is a person's done-" Shikadai again felt a jarring sensation as he remembered his mother uttering all too similar words-"and then we have to ask ourselves what we did wrong to make that person turn out that way-why our bonds with that person weren't strong enough to guide him in the right direction."

"What? You'd blame yourself?" Shikadai asked, face scrunched up in confusion. "But what good would it be blaming yourself for what someone else did?"

"Remember what we told you about Sunagakure being one giant organism in it of its own right?" Yaoki reminded Shikadai. "All of us a part of one being. For example, if I were to kill someone-not that I would do that! Without a reason, anyway-with my bare hands, would you blame my hands for committing the crime? Or would you just blame me?"

Shikadai's mouth formed an "O" as he absorbed the words that Yaoki and Korobi had just imparted; the two looked back at him expectantly.

Finally, he nodded. In a quiet voice, he said, "I understand."

The two nin perked up. "We're so glad!" Yaoki exclaimed.

"Lord Gaara would be proud of us!"

Shikadai smirked at the return of their eccentric antics. "Seriously, thank you, Yaoki, Korobi. I owe you one."

"But you've already treated us to dango! That is more than enough from you, Lord Shikadai."

"Please. The dango was my treat to you as a friend." Shikadai swore the two were close to swooning when he declared them himself their "friend". "But now I seriously owe you one."

"Really?"

"Mm."

Shikadai finished his dango and looked up curiously when he realized that silence had fallen over the two talkative nin. He was a bit startled to see them staring at him intently. He suddenly felt self-conscious-although he realized he should have felt this way a long time ago, with their calling him "Lord Shikadai" and all.

"Um...what is it?" he hesitantly asked.

"Say...Lord Shikadai...you have a lot of hair. And it's long, too," Korobi remarked.

Well this is weird, Shikadai thought. "Umm...thanks? I guess?"

"I already have a charm with a lock of Lord Gaara's hair," Yaoki said, once again displaying the crimson object, "but apparently it's fake. But Lord Shikadai has so much hair-perhaps you could spare a little bit so I could get a real one?"

Korobi jumped up and gasped. "Authentic strands from the Kazekage bloodline! Could I have some too, Lord Shikadai?"

Shikadai laughed nervously-and awkwardly. None of his friends, no matter how close, had craved for his hair before. "Umm...sure, I guess. I guess I do owe you, huh?"

Quicker than Shikadai could blink, Yaoki had whipped out a pair of scissors with which he could procure the "authentic strands from the Kazekage bloodline." Shikadai eyed it nervously. "Uhhh...just...don't cut too much, I guess. I don't care much about appearances but I sure as hell don't want to be bald yet."

"I assure you, Lord Shikadai, it'd be impossible for you to look anything but dashing with or without any hair at all!" Korobi assured. Shikadai did not feel assured.

"Still, though..."

The boy gulped as he saw two Suna nin with hungry looks on their faces descending upon him with a pair of scissors meant to collect his black locks.

---

Shikadai didn't think too much about it when he saw his father waiting for him at the door to the Nara family home when he returned that afternoon. He was a genius, after all, and he deduced that Uncle Naruto was giving his father time off work, just like he was his mother, because of their family's special circumstances this particular week.

It was odd, however, that his normally lethargic, cigarette-smoking dad Shikamaru Nara was standing faithfully at the door, waiting for his son to come back, one hand shoved in his pocket and the other holding a glass of cool water.

Still, it was too troublesome to ask his father why he was doing something as troublesome as idly waiting for Shikadai with a glass of water, so Shikadai simply wordlessly accepted it. He was not even particularly thirsty, but for some reason, the liquid tasted sweet on his tongue and slid pleasurably down his throat.

He returned the empty glass to Shikamaru.

His father smiled at him in a manner that looked slightly strained but brutally earnest at the same time.

"Don't be thirsty. It's troublesome," Shikamaru advised Shikadai while padding away.

It didn't take five seconds after entering the kitchen that Shikamaru found himself pinned to the wall by his overly-strong wife. And I'm supposed to be the man in this relationship, he thought. Yeah right.

"Spill," Temari growled at him.

"What, the water?" Shikamaru asked sarcastically. "Sorry to break it to you, but there's no water left to spill in this cup." He held out the empty glass. "Your son drank all of it."

Temari did not yank the glass from his hand or whack him on the back of the head, and that was what started to make Shikamaru feel scared. Instead, she said lowly, "I don't have time for your fucking games, Nara. What was that all about?"

Shikamaru sighed in defeat. "Look, Temari, he doesn't have much time left here. As his father I wanted to give him a home but he doesn't consider this place his home anymore. And now he's obviously going through a crucial phase in his life and it hurts to see that his mother and her brothers are the only ones who can help him, while I have to stand to the side and watch like some fucking useless piece of shit."

Temari's eyes softened slightly.

"I've been to Suna before and it's damn dry over there," Shikamaru continued. "If Shikadai's going to live there he's going to find out the hard way just how precious water can be. Don't laugh at me for being sentimental, but I really just wanted to give him something to remember me by. Water can be the most precious gift to someone in the desert when it counts, so maybe over the next year, when he's baking to death in Suna and he decides to take a drink of water, he'll think of us and remember that he still has a home here."

For the first time sine their fight (the two of them really knew how to hold a grudge), Temari let down all of the fierce and angry barriers before her eyes and softened herself to Shikamaru. "My troublesome idiot wants to be a good daddy," she half-mocked, half-praised.

Shikamaru smiled; the Temari he loved was finally back. "It's the least I can do so he doesn't wind up too much like his mother's side," he drawled, smirking.

"You married the wrong woman if you didn't want your kid to turn out like his mother," Temari smirked back, leaning in close to Shikamaru's face, tickling his nose with her warm, light breath-

Before she pulled away, swiftly taking the empty water glass in his hand along with her. "You've much to do before you deserve any of that, crybaby."

"Fucking tease," he complained, though the smile still played at his lips.

She turned away from her husband, throwing a final comment over her shoulder, "You're doing it all wrong. People have to be able to find water in Suna if they want to survive. You're not helping him any if you just hand it to him on a silver platter. Genius."

The days slid by after Shikadai's initial meeting with Yaoki and Korobi.

Shikamaru knew that playing shougi with his son wouldn't be a good idea; he'd heard from Kurenai what had happened during the previous game. He also knew that talking to him wouldn't be a good idea; Gaara was the only one who would be able to through to him now. Shikamaru had long since realized that while he had passed down a significant portion of his Nara genes to Shikadai, a petty bloodline like his own could not overpower the much stronger Kazekage bloodline that also resided within his son. His son was now bearing the burden of his maternal heritage, and Shikamaru knew that as much as he was able to sympathize, he wouldn't be able to understand. He cursed all the sufferings that Temari's family had been through, and the continued sufferings that were now being imposed on his son, and he cursed the fact that as much as he wanted to be a good father to Shikadai, he really was just a naive spectator from a carefree, trouble-free family. Shikamaru accepted the fact that he'd been the branch on which Shikadai had grown up, but now it was time for his boy to open his wings and fly away. I thought I'd have more time to watch him grow up. He's only twelve. Well, I always be here if he needs a tree branch to stop and rest on. The best thing he could do now was to let Shikadai go.

And one other thing.

Shikadai found himself taking a liking for sitting by the window and looking out of it-something, he realized, that Uncle Gaara was also fond of doing. He likened himself to a bird caged in Konoha, a place he'd thought was a home but was now turning into a prison. Time was ticking by, however, and it'd only be a matter of time before he'd get to see Konohagakure from the outside. He took his time to memorize what it looked like from within his prison cell.

Every day, when Shikadai approached the window, he found a glass of cool water waiting for him, the clear liquid reflecting the golden sunlight in a strangely hypnotizing manner. For the many hours that he would sit and observe Konoha from the glass pane called a window, he would slowly savor the water, saving it so that more of his time might be blessed with a precious drop.

Seven days passed since he had received Uncle Gaara's letter.

In a manner that was almost ritualistic, Shikadai made his way to sit by the windowpane-he barely did anything else these days. He sat down and looked at the sill, only to find that instead of a glass of water, a large canteen was awaiting his arrival.

He picked up it up and weighed it in his hands, feeling and hearing the valuable liquid sloshing around inside it.

He inexplicably realized, without reason, that this was the last water he would find in a long time. The glasses of water that had been left waiting for him for the past week had been enough to sustain him for his hours by the window; but this time, the canteen would have to sustain him for an immeasurable journey.

He remembered its sweet taste and decided to save the water.

Still gripping the canteen tightly in his hands, he leaned forward and peered out the window, looking at the prosperous green city he had for so long called home-and that he no longer did.

When Shikadai heard the slow, lethargic footsteps approaching him from behind, he needed not turn around to identify to whom they belonged.

Keeping his eyes trained on the image of the village of Konoha outside the glass pane, he kept his ears alert for whatever Shikamaru might have to say to him.

What he did not anticipate, however, was the distinct loosening feeling on his scalp as the hair tie that kept his ponytail in place was gently released. His black hair cascaded down onto his shoulders before he had a chance to realize what was happening. In confusion, he turned to look with questioning eyes to his father, but was stopped when he felt warm breath in his hair.

Shikadai's hair was a little past his shoulders and a bit spiky on the top when it was tied up, and Shikamaru inhaled the dark locks affectionately. It was different from his own, which fell strictly straight when not in a ponytail. Many people remarked that Shikadai was an uncanny copy of his father, but Shikamaru believed that was what the classic Nara ponytail led them to believe-Shikadai had Temari's teal eye color and the Sand Siblings' facial structure, and, when his hair was flowing freely, the Sand Siblings' unruly hair. Now he even had Uncle Gaara's rimmed eyes. Shikamaru looked proudly at the boy he called his son.

He placed his hand on Shikadai's shoulder. "Hey," he greeted softly. Shikadai continued looking at him in confusion. He's been living under the Nara image for too long. Under my image for too long. "It's time for you to stop being me. It's time for you to start being you."

Shikamaru handed the hair tie back to Shikadai, silently letting him know that he no longer had to use it to put his Nara image in his place. He was his own person now.

For the first time in what felt like a long time, Shikadai felt himself completely let his guard down, softening his eyes before the man he was proud to call his father. The voice in his head stayed quiet and he felt an odd peace.

"Shikadai! Shikamaru! Lunch!" Temari called from the kitchen. Shikadai smirked when Shikamaru immediately grumbled under his breath.

Father and son walked into the dining room side by side to see Temari setting the table. Shikadai engrained this scene into his memory, for he never knew if this might be the last time.

"About time you two lazy asses came along," Temari chided.

"Troublesome woman, all you had to do was set the table. I was the one who cooked today."

"Only after I made you do it, crybaby."

Shikamaru smirked and Shikadai smiled, desperately clinging on to the sense of satisfaction that he was feeling right now with his family and at the same time silently despairing that such things were not made to last. As the seconds ticked by, he could already feel the content and happiness slipping out of his poor grasp.

Stop this, he told himself, happy that he was the one telling himself this, not some unsolicited voice in his head. Just hold on to what sanity feels like while you can.

"Shikadai." As it had so many times, his mother's gruff voice shook him out of his thoughts.

"Hmm...?" Shikadai replied casually.

"..Aunt Ino is throwing you a party."

Sanity flew out the window.

Shikadai had half the mind to stand up and start yelling profanities and half the mind to slump in defeat. Instead, he settled for staring at his mother disbelievingly with googly eyes. "Was the only reason that woman was born to be troublesome?"

Shikamaru smiled behind his hand; Ino was his friend and all, but he himself had thought similar thoughts countless times of the blonde busybody. He simply hadn't communicated them as directly as his son had.

Temari remained unruffled. "It's later today."

Shikadai had as assumed as much. Today was the seventh day since he'd received Uncle Gaara's letter.

"She's throwing it at the Hokage's house," Shikamaru supplied.

Shikadai scowled. That wily woman, he thought, she knews very well it'd be hard for me to refuse the Hokage. "He agreed?"

"Uncle Naruto thought it would be a nice idea to throw you a goodbye party. Aunt Ino insists it's a celebration of your release from the hospital since your first mission outside the village. Call it what you want."

"I don't want it."

"I know," Shikamaru and Temari answered at the same time.

Shikadai sighed. "Do I have to...?" he asked reluctantly.

"No," Shikamaru and Temari again answered simultaneously.

Shikadai sighed again. His parents were allowing to decide whether or not he would provide attendance to the troublesome affair, but he was aware of the silent imploration in their eyes-whether or not they were aware of it, he didn't know-that he would at least make the attempt. To see his friends and teammates as such-and not as enemies. Shikadai didn't know if he could-he was quite sure he couldn't-but he couldn't refuse the look in his parents' eyes.

Getting up, he grumbled, "How many times have I told that woman I don't need this? I don't need some damned party, and I don't need her." Sighing, he started walking out of the room. "I'm gonna get ready."

Shikamaru and Temari silently let him go, but before Shikadai fully exited the room, he paused and asked over his shoulder, "Where are Shinchi and Icho staying?"

Temari immediately recognized the names of the two Suna chunin. "At the inn by the Hokage Tower reserved for foreign dignitaries."

Shikadai quirked a brow. "The place Uncle Gaara and Uncle Kankuro normally stay?"

"Yes."

"Isn't that place reserved for V.I.P.'s?"

Shikamaru chuckled. "They are V.I.P.'s, at least this time round they are. They are escorts for an extremely important figurehead in both Suna and Konoha, after all."

That means me, Shikadai realized. "Hn." He walked out of the room. He could feel the dreaded monster in his mind awakening from its slumber, stretching its limbs and preparing for flight.

Shikamaru and Temari watched their son's retreating back.

In a low whispering tone, Shikamaru asked Temari, "Has he packed anything yet? ...For his upcoming trip?"

In the same volume of voice, Temari replied, "Nope. Not a single thing."

"For a whole year, and not even a single...?" Shikamaru pinched the bridge of his nose. "I wouldn't have expected more. This is pretty in character for him, but...the thing is, I doubt he didn't pack because of laziness this time."

Temari nodded. "It's because of...lack of necessity. There's nothing he not willing to leave behind."

---

The Nara family had walked in silence to the Hokage's home, Shikamaru and Temari on either side of Shikadai, whose hourglass was tucked snugly as ever in his pouch with his new canteen of water now strapped to his belt.

Aunt Hinata and Uncle Naruto had smilingly opened the door together and welcomed the Nara family in. The four adults immediately engaged in lively conversation (initiated by Naruto, obviously), while entering the house through the front hallway. Shikadai relished in the relative quietness of the entire abode. He and his parents were the first arrivals on this particular day, and he knew the peace wouldn't last for long-not if the party, which he equated to hell in his mind, was going to soon break loose.

Shikadai shook his head at the way the four adults seemed to have completely forgotten his existence-save for Aunt Hinata, who threw him a quick and kind smile-once they had started talking. Not that he minded, he was thanking the heavens for this moment he could have to himself (Boruto and Himawari appeared to not be home). While his and his friends' parents settled down to talk in the kitchen, Shikadai wandered aimlessly along the spacious Uzumaki living room.

Shikadai began unconsciously taking in the differences between this home and his own. The Uzumakis lived in a large abode-thanks to Naruto being the Hokage, and the living room was graced with floor-length glass doors that overlooked Hokage Mountain. The view outside just might make you forget what this really is...a prison cell window.

Shikadai cursed. The voice was making its unsolicited opinion again.

He went to the cabinets and found their tops littered with photograph after photograph after photograph. There were a few framed memories in the Nara home, but none nearly as many as the Uzumakis'.

Shikadai stopped when he reached one particular photograph-or photographs, rather. It was single frame that was foldable, with one picture slot on one side and another on the other. The first photograph depicted Uncle Naruto and four other individuals. Uncle Naruto held up an obnoxious peace sign, which inadvertently completely blocked out the face of one of the four other individuals. Shikadai realized that the two other men and the one woman were the Raikage, Mizukage, and Tsuchikage. On the other hand, the one whose face had been obscured by Uncle Naruto's peace sign was depicted on the second photograph of the picture frame: Uncle Naruto stood with an arm draped around his shorter contemporary, the Kazekage, Sabaku no Gaara. The latter man actually sported a smile.

Shikadai's heart swelled at the thought that Uncle Naruto might consider Uncle Gaara more important to him than the other Kage-more important to him than just the leader of an allied nation. He scrutinized the photograph and noticed, in the top left hand corner, all-too-familiar cursive handwriting:

We will never again be alone.

On the top right hand corner, in a childish scrawl, was written:

Best Friends Forever! 3 ^_^ :D

"That's pretty cool, isn't it?"

Shikadai spun around, not having noticed that the adults' conversation had died down due to the fact that its loudest contributor had temporarily left them. Uncle Naruto was standing over Shikadai with a bright grin adorning his tan face. The boy had no idea if Naruto knew about the stunt he'd pulled off with Himawari the other day-considering that Hinata had witnessed it, he probably did. But made no show of being upset on his lit face. Shikadai blamed an invisible magnetic pull that was now tugging the corners of his own lips upwards. Then his eyes slid down to the Hokage's arm, which was hidden suspiciously behind his back.

"It's one of my favorites," the Hokage continued, gesturing at the photo of him and his "best friend forever 3 ^_^ :D". "I'll never try to compete with that guy..." with his free hand Uncle Naruto pointed at Gaara's face, "he's just too awesome. You're one lucky bastard, Shikadai! But don't forget that Uncle Naruto is pretty cool too, believe it! Got it?"

Uncle Naruto revealed the hand hidden behind his back. In it was a small camera.

Shikadai's eyes widened. Naruto inwardly smiled: with the rings around Shikadai's eyes and his hair down (he hadn't tied it up since his father had pulled out the ponytail), he looked exceptionally like his redheaded uncle. Yet Gaara could never pull off the facial expressions Shikadai could make.

Before Shikadai could respond, Naruto had thrust the object into Shikadai's hands.

"This is your Hokage speaking, Shikadai! Your mission for the next year is to capture hilarious private moments of the Kazekage!" Naruto yelled. His own words suddenly seemed to register in his brain. "Uh-uh-" he stammered, "I mean-in a good-not...inappropriate...way-believe it..."

The Hokage scampered off.

Shikadai fiddled with the camera in his hands and plopped down on one of the Uzumakis' soft plush couches. He eyed the door. Soon, swarms of people would be coming through this way. Perhaps he could make it through this party yet.

There was knock on said door. Shikadai watched Aunt Hinata rush from the kitchen to answer it. He wondered who would the next arrival be.

The door opened. Oh, it's just Mitsuki. He's always one of the first to arrive. The party's getting started-

A wave of skull-crushing pain suddenly flooded Shikadai's head, and amidst the thundering rush of his blood and the ringing in his years he heard a demonic cry, This is the END!

Shikadai's entire body jerked in pain and surprise; unnoticed by him, Mitsuki and Aunt Hinata looked at him. He tried his best to quell the raging tempest within him, whilst trying to decipher the cryptic meaning of the inner voice's words. Neither attempt got very far, and he found his elbows resting on his knees while his hands clutched at his head, his entire body a quivering mess.

The clock is ticking...the time is coming...this is the end! he heard.

Shikadai willed the voice away to an extent where it was simply echoing loudly and eerily off the chambers of his brain. He looked up to see Aunt Hinata and Mitsuki standing over him, looking down at him with concern.

"Are you okay?" Mitsuki asked guardedly.

Shikadai attempted to smile but by the look on Mitsuki's face, it had not come across as such. "Hi," he greeted.

Shikadai wasn't left alone for the rest of the party. He watched the arrival of friend after friend-Tenten, Rock and Metal Lee, Kiba Inuzuka and Shino Aburame, Sarada and, suprisingly, both her parents, Hanabi Hyuga, Kurenai and Mirai, and Inojin and Chouchou with their parents-and yet he didn't actually spend his time as much with them as he did with the whispers in his mind.

It didn't take long for the place to get chaotic. Uncle Naruto was an enthusiastic host, and Aunt Ino was constantly screaming at everyone and everything. Most of the guests brought masses of food that was laid out on the table. While the food was quickly devoured by the party's many attendants, it was left untouched by Shikadai, who remained seated on the couch and unreceptive to the many people who approached him. He was busy eating his insanity.

Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a blur of electric blonde and midnight blue barge through the door.

It would be better not knowing where the Uzumaki siblings had been prior to arrival, but now that they were here, their presence was made very obvious.

"I am home and ready to PAR-TAY!" Boruto yelled, with Himawari squealing after him.

Shikadai turned away from the source of loud cacophony that was Boruto and his little sister.

This is the end, the voice chanted endlessly into his mind. Be prepared, the winds of change never blow backwards.

He could hear the screeching and howling of untamed winds thrashing in his head, but concealed behind the whistles of the gusts of air were screams of agony and anguish to people he didn't know and people he didn't want to know.

A hand tapped him on the shoulder.

THIS IS THE END-

Quite unable to take it any longer, Shikadai lashed out at whoever had placed their hand on his shoulder. "SHUT THE HELL UP!" he yelled.

Many of the house's occupants turned their heads, having heard Shikadai's loud outburst. Many jaws dropped to see the Nara boy yelling at Sasuke Uchiha.

Shikamaru and Temari noticed, but merely sighed and shrugged before continuing to converse with the alarmed Chouji and Karui.

Shikadai observed with surprise that it was Sasuke Uchiha who had approached him. Of all things that could have piqued Sasuke's rather dead curiosity, Shikadai seemed to have had.

"I assume you weren't talking to me..." Sasuke told Shikadai.

Shikadai looked at the Uchiha man for several moments. Could he know...?

"No," Shikadai replied.

To Shikadai's utter surprise, the stoic, reserved man held out his hand. "I wish you luck." If he's going to be the underling of that Gaara, he's going to need it, Sasuke thought.

After eyeing the hand suspiciously for several moments, Shikadai finally stood up and shook it. He exchanged nods with Sarada's father, noticing, in the corner of his eye, the girl and her mother gaping at his exchange with Sasuke.

With that, the Uchiha man swept away.

Noise and chatter returned to the atmosphere of the party, and Shikadai prepared to settle down again when he was jostled by a whir of blonde.

Taken surprise, it took several moments for Shikadai to register that he was being shaken profusely by Boruto Uzumaki, and that standing behind him were the boys of their, Inojin, Metal Lee, and Mitsuki.

He sent a look Inojin's way and the Yamanaka boy immediately looked away. Turning back to Boruto, he asked, annoyed, "What?"

"Geez, you're hopeless," Boruto rolled his eyes, "I've called you like twenty times already, ya know! I said for all us boys to gather 'round and you just kept staring into space-get your head out of the clouds, buddy!"

His head hadn't really been in the clouds-rather, it'd been in a much darker place.

"I know, I know!" Boruto exclaimed. "I said for all boys to gather 'round...and you ignored us...are you secretly a GIRL?"

Shikadai rolled his eyes at the ridiculous notion.

"Is that why you're wearing your hair down?" Boruto continued in a squeaky squeal. "Aw, don't be embarrassed, Miss Nara, I think you look cute." Boruto grabbed his hand as if to kiss the back of it, but Shikadai yanked himself away in time.

"What the fuck do you want, Uzumaki?"

"Dad bought me this new video game and it's pretty bloody and awesome. I wanna go kick all of your asses!"

Shikadai followed a laughing Boruto into the game room, ignoring the three other boys and shaking off the annoying Metal Lee, who screamed in his ear, "Yosh! Shikadai! We shall kick off our rivalry with a battle of game consoles and avatars!"

In the end, Shikadai emerged victorious. He had fun.

The others-not so much. Inojin had played diligently, his tongue protruding unconsciously from the corner of his mouth as his brow furrowed in concentration. Mitsuki had played with a smirk playing on his lips. Rock Lee had single-handedly played the game-quite literally, since he was continuously pumping a fist into the air and yelling, "Yosh!" or "Youth!"

Boruto, the self-proclaimed champion, had ended up losing to all four of his opponents. "WHAT! I don't believe it-I lost to the lazy bastard? Rematch, now!"

They had all been equally disturbed, however, by the way Shikadai had practically murdered his game console with his thumbs throughout the game, and how he'd worn a feral grin throughout the game (although he was unaware of it himself), almost as if he wished the blood, gore, and killing, and screaming in the video game were real.

No one really wanted a repeat of their utter defeat at Shikadai's hands, so the boys ignored Boruto's insistent urges at a rematch and filed out of the game room. Metal Lee approached Shikadai, offering a handshake.

"Good game, my rival! However, you should watch out! You may have won this time, but we will have more contests to come and I shall prove that my youthful ninja way is the best of them all!"

Shikadai looked at Metal Lee's extended hand in disdain. He resisted the urge to spit on it. He turned his back on the beaming Lee boy and walked in the opposite direction. "Tch. Don't lower me to your standards."

Shikadai stopped when he found Inojin several feet in front of him, staring at him with wide and apprehensive big blue eyes. Inojin's feet kept shifting, and when the Yamanaka boy noticed his other teammate, Chouchou, he summoned her over with a wave of his hand. Shikadai quirked an amused brow when Inojin and Chouchou began speaking to one another in hushed tones, glancing at Shikadai every so often.

Finally, they seemed to reach a conclusion; Chouchou took a few deep breaths and Inojin gulped before stepping forward, approaching Shikadai and opening his mouth to say-

"Shikadai, boy! Won't you try some of my mashed chestnuts? It's a new recipe!" Aunt Ino's loud voice easily overpowered that of her son's, and she didn't even notice Inojin as she shoved past him and Chouchou to reach Shikadai. She shoved a plate into Shikadai's unwilling plate.

Bewildered-and distracted from whatever Inojin had been about to say-Shikadai looked down at the food Aunt Ino had thrust into his hands. He found himself staring at a plate of-sure enough, mashed chestnuts-which appeared like a brown mush that reminded Shikadai of the last time he'd seen something similar to this.

He'd raised his hand to find it covered in something disgustingly warm and thick, the brown substance tinted with the shine of Gold Dust and the crimson of blood. The crushed flesh Shikadai had worn on his skin at that moment had smelled of death, but the man to whom this pulverized hand belonged was still screaming notes of agony that echoed and imprinted themselves in Shikadai's brain.

What had he called it? Oh, that's right: purée.

CRASH

The plate and its puréed contents slipped from Shikadai's hands before he realized it. He faintly heard Aunt Ino screaming at him ("What the hell was that for, young man? Couldn't you at least try it-and not make a mess? Do you know how much time I spent making it-"), but she stopped when she noticed Shikadai's hand coming up to cover his mouth in a poor attempt to stop the torrent coming up from his stomach.

In a state of half-daze and alarm, Shikadai roughly pushed his way past the crowd, not noticing that it had grown shock-silent in the wake of the shattering of his plate. He dashed through the hallways and a loud SLAM of the bathroom door echoed throughout the Uzumaki abode. No one could really keep from grimacing as they heard the muffled sound of retching.

Ino looked down at the ruined plate of her mashed chestnuts. "Is my cooking really that bad?" she wondered aloud, frowning.

Inojin and Chouchou knew it wasn't because of the former's mother's cooking. Inojin was not usually one to take initiative, being pacified and soft-spoken as he was but at this moment, he grabbed Chouchou's hand without a moment's hesitation and rushed after his best friend.

"We have to do something," he muttered. Chouchou, once overcoming her surprise at Inojin's sudden forwardness, nodded vigorously.

The room was again shell-shocked silent as the Yamanaka and Akimichi scampered off and disappeared into the hallway after their Nara friend.

---

Shikadai nearly choked on the acrid bile that rose from his throat and flooded from his mouth into the porcelain bowl beneath him-he hadn't time to lament the loss of the lunch his father had cooked that afternoon, for amidst an inexplicable pain in his head was drowned in the voice's screaming of, "Enjoy it, you little monster! This is the taste of Ryomen's bloooood! Doesn't it taste like...ecstasy?"

Soon, Shikadai could no longer discern whether it was the thought of "human purée" that was inducing his vomit, or whether it was what the voice suggested about said topic.

He barely noticed when a pale blonde boy and a dark-skinned girl barged into the bathroom, their faces the definition of concern and worry.

Inojin rushed over to his best friend and pulled his hair back from his face, rubbing calming circles on his back as Shikadai continued to empty the bitter, vile contents of his stomach into the toilet.

After the torrent of puke had ended and Shikadai was reduced to coughing and spluttering, Chouchou made her way over and hauled her teammate up from the position in which he was kneeling, dragged him to the sink, and helped him rinse himself off.

Shikadai had allowed all this to happen, his mind being clouded by the taste of bile in his mouth. However, the water washed that and the fogginess in his brain away, and he suddenly became acutely aware of the two presences in too close of a proximity to him. Alarm overcame him and he shoved them off.

Inojin stumbled backwards and Chouchou, having been closer to Shikadai, received the full force of his surprisingly strong push and ended up hitting the opposite wall with an "Oof!"

Now on the receiving end of Shikadai's deadly glare, the two suddenly became unaware of what to do next.

None of them enjoyed their tense triangle of silence that was threatening to implode any minute. Wary of anything like that happening, Inojin finally opened his mouth, rushing through his words.

"Look, Shikadai, I know this seems kind of random and sudden but please hear me out. A lot of things have...happened, and I-we-both Chouchou and I-want to let you know that we're sorry. For everything."

Inojin and Chouchou did not like the look Shikadai was giving them. "Why are you apologizing?" the Nara boy asked simply.

"B-because, b-because..." Inojin cleared his throat and restarted. "On that mission, we didn't work together like at team like we were supposed to, and I was...m-mad at you for no real reason...maybe if we had worked together none of that...would have happened...?"

Shikadai snorted. The results of that mission would have been the same regardless. The men Ryomen had hired were simply too strong for Ino-Shika-Chou to defeat that time, no matter what tensions may or may not have been coursing high through the team at the time.

Inojin looked uncomfortable, but he continued. "I-Chouchou and I-shouldn't have ignored you after we came back-I know you've been going through a really rough time and as your best friends we should have supported you. We're-we're sorry."

Shikadai's response was, needless to say, not encouraging. He continued glaring at Inojin as if he had not heard a word of what the blonde boy had just told him.

"And I'm sorry, because I was totally unreasonable that day-when you and your uncle came to the flower shop. I shouldn't have been so-been so-naïve-stupid-what I said was out of place. I shouldn't have gone assuming things and your uncle-I can see it now-he really is a great man...I mean he saved our lives. Please forgive me."

Shikadai rolled his eyes.

Inojin was beginning to lose his resolve, and Chouchou looked at him worriedly. He finally steeled himself one last time and continued, "It's been seven days, hasn't it? Since you got the Kazekage's letter? We're happy for you Shikadai, really, we are, but today's the day you gotta choose and as your team, we had to make sure that before you made your decision to go-"

Inojin was interrupted by a low, dry sound. He and Chouchou turned to see Shikadai doubled over and clutching his stomach as he chuckled, almost as if he had just heard something extremely amusing. "Uh, Shikadai-" Chouchou began.

Shikadai threw back his unkempt black hair and laughed out loud. "Ha, ha-so we finally get to the point, don't we, Yamanaka? Don't try to lie to yourselves that you actually care about someone like me!"

"Of course we care about you-" Chouchou interrupted, unable to help herself-

"Come on, Chouchou, don't let that Yamanaka coward rub off on you. What do you have to apologize to me for? Just admit that the only reason you're standing here in front of me-which you hate, by the way, I can tell by the way you're shaking-is because you're afraid of what's going to happen to your precious 'team'! You need three people for a squad, don't you? And you were just unlucky enough to have me as your third person."

"We've always been a team, Shikadai!" Chouchou burst out. "We always worked together so well on the past, we were Team Ino-Shika-Chou! Did all that really mean nothing to you? What changed?"

"Nothing."

Inojin sent Chouchou a look that warned her not to antagonize Shikadai, but she didn't notice. She had always been impulsive. "I beg to differ! Nothing's changed? Have you taken a look at yourself lately? Look, Shikadai, I understand if you're taking things hard and yeah, we all need time to recuperate, but sorry to break it to ya, buddy, you're just getting ridiculous. Look, you're not the only one who suffered-"

In less than a blink of an eye, Shikadai had sprang across the bathroom and pinned his female teammate to the wall by the neck.

"Don't pretend to understand," he growled.

Inojin grew alarmed at Shikadai's handling of his female teammate. He grabbed Shikadai's sleeve and pleaded for him to let go and calm down.

Shikadai's response was to punch Inojin in the face.

Inojin stumbled backwards, unsure whether his nose hurt more from the punch or his heart from the pain of being hurt by his childhood best friend.

"I'd say I was sorry for ruining a perfect team of three, but I can't really feel sorry for a team that never existed."

"But Team Ino-Shika-Chou-all those years-missions-" Inojin protested.

"As I said, you don't understand," Shikadai cut back harshly. "Not that I would expect you to. We're different, you and I. The two of you-your roots lie in the forest were thousands of tree share common soil. You feed on water from a clear spring.

I-my roots lie in the sand and I live off the a desert plant that grows in the middle of isolation. We have to dig down deep to find water, and we sustain ourselves off a poisoned spring."

"Wh-what-are you talking about?" Chouchou choked out.

"I'm talking about how, for all my life, I've been tricked into drinking from the forest's clear spring. It's different for you because this is where your seeds were planted and grown. But you see, for those whose roots lie in the sand, feeding off the clean, natural water is the same as poison, while poison itself gives them...vitality."

"That's-that's not true!" Inojin argued. "If people just-work together-"

A crazed fury suddenly entered Shikadai's eyes, and he gripped Chouchou's throat harder. Inojin desperately held his hands up in a placating manner to try to appease the angered boy.

"All of you think you're so great. Why do you all keep trying to feed me your poison? I've told you all I don't need it-I can't." Shikadai suddenly seemed short of breath. "This place, this awful place-it's strangling me, it's conspiring against me-" His eyes suddenly lit up with enlightenment. "I need to get out of here before it kills me."

He abruptly let go of Chouchou, who gasped for much needed air and slid to the ground. In the past, she would have seized the opportunity to punch Shikadai in the face like he had Inojin, but with the current situation she found none of her usual zest and resolve.

Without so much as another comment, Shikadai turned with another word and began walking out of the bathroom and away from his two teammates.

Inojin hurried after him. "Wait-Shikadai-please!" he pleaded, clinging to Shikadai's shirt. "Don't do this so quickily-please, let's talk about it!"

Shikadai shrugged Inojin off without even looking at him. "My eyes were closed before they were even allowed to open. It's been that way for too many years and I now that I've finally opened them, I'll be damned if I'll close them again. The world is darker when your eyes are open and I don't see you in it."

True to his word, Shikadai did not see the look of hurt on Inojin's face as he walked away.

Gaara had the uncanny ability to make others fall silent without uttering a word, and that trait now proved to be genetic. As Shikadai reentered the Uzumaki living room, the bustling bodies and conversation slowed to a stop in order to carefully observe the reappearance of the Kazekage's nephew after his bizarre episode.

The respective parents of Inojin, Chouchou, and Shikadai were standing together and the former two couples noticed, with no small amount of dread, that their own children had not returned with Shikadai.

Shikadai ignored the stares of everyone in the room and walked to Shikamaru and Temari with a purpose. While everyone else looked at each in confusion and asked unspoken "What is he going to do now?"s, his parents met his gaze straight-on with similarly unspoken understanding.

He stopped right in front of them, disregarding Ino, Sai, Chouji, and Karui as if they were not standing inches from him as well. For some reason, even the loudmouthed Ino, the blunt Sai, the sometimes-clueless Chouji, and the headstrong Karui knew not to open their mouths.

Shikadai knew exactly what to say to Shikamaru and Temari, and they him. So they said nothing at all, because there was nothing to say.

For a normal twelve-year-old child with normal parents, this would be the heartwarming, bittersweet moment in which they exchanged hugs and sweet nothings to one another. But this was twelve-year-old child and parents who existed to defy normal.

Shikamaru looked down at his son and did not smile. It was not appropriate to do so. Instead, he offered his hand, and Shikadai shook it, briefly reminded of Sasuke Uchiha's similar gesture until he felt the inexplicable bond of parenthood and family pass through him as his own hand made contact with his father's larger one.

Please help him, little brother, Shikamaru thought grimly, thinking of the Kazekage.

Shikadai turned to Temari. He found himself temporarily mesmerized by her teal eyes-the eyes he'd inherited. He could feel the sparks just by looking into them.

A handshake did not seem like a proper exchange between them. Instead, Shikadai fumbled in his pockets and pulled out the black, velvet string-the one he'd removed from Uncle Gaara's letter a week ago. With shaking fingers, he reached up-Temari, seeming to gain sense of what her son was doing, leaned down-and he tied the ribbon of fate around his mother's neck.

He took one last, deep look into his parents' eyes, catching a quiet shimmering and gentle glistening-and then turned away, knowing that they were still tied together.

On his way, Shikadai did not stop at the Nara abode to pick anything up. Anything that he could have carried on his person was superficial. They belonged to a time and place that no longer existed.

He patted his canteen several times and then fingered Uncle Gaara's hourglass. I'm coming home.

He reached the inn for foreign diplomats and asked the clerk to direct him to Shinchi and Icho's room. He approached Rooms ww and prepared to knock when the door opened, as if its occupants had been known he was coming all along.

Shikadai almost expected the steel-haired, orange-eyed girl to exchange meaningless nothings with him-a "how are you," or even "what are you doing here". They didn't even ask Shikadai whether or not he had decided-technically, he had not said yes or no to the "proposal"-was he going to Suna or not?

Instead, she flashed her teeth at him and asked no questions. "At your service, Lazy Prince."

Shikadai remembered Yaoki and Korobi calling him a "little prince". This must have been Icho's cruel twist on it.

Shinchi appeared beside her in a matter of seconds. Like Icho, he asked no questions, although he was much more serious. He gave Shikadai a curt nod that Shikadai found himself returning.

Like Shikadai, the two Suna chunin did not seem to have many possessions to collect, either; Icho practically flounced out the door, and Shinchi nonchalantly slung a pack-one that looked rather heavy, in Shikadai's opinion-over his back.

Although he was the only one who was from Konoha, Shikadai did not lead the way. Shinchi and Icho walked in front of him, seemingly to recognize the path to Konoha's gates very well. That, however, wasn't their destination. They're destination was far beyond Konoha's gates.

Kotetsu and Izumo smiled at Shikadai when they stamped Shinchi's and Icho's passports. They don't see you, the inner voice told him. That's why they're smiling. They still think you're human-ha, ha, ha...

Shikadai ran his fingers through his loose hair, feeling the wind blow through it in the direction away from Konoha. He didn't know when it'd happened, but he'd learned to listen to the wind. Welcome, it told him.

For the second time in his life, Shikadai stepped outside Konoha's gates, still in a squad of three but without Mirai and an evil stranger accompanying him. This time, he left together with his new team. He looked contemplatively at midnight blue and steel silver of the backs of the respectives heads of Shnchi and Icho.

Shikadai allowed his feet to lead him. Konoha was a place for happy families and happy endings, he thought. That's why I left.

The soles of his shinobi sandals imprinted themselves into the soil, but Shikadai did not turn his head to look back at the village that was supposed to imprinted its influence into his person.

If he had turned back, he would have seen the green, forested city growing smaller and smaller, until it was so distant it could be blotted out from his vision if he raised his thumb.

But he didn't turn back. The presence of Konoha had grown so miniscule in his heart as to not exist at all. He had stopped seeing Konoha long ago.

He allowed his feet to carry him to the place wear the wind would not allow his footprints to stay in the sand for long.