Author's Note:
I've noticed an influx of reviews both here and AO3 last chapter, so thank you guys so much, I really appreciate it! This is the final chapter before we start delving into Narcissa's baby drama, so enjoy the lack of crazy angst while you can, lol.
CHAPTER X
Summer, 1975
"Oh… my God."
In all honesty, Narcissa didn't know why she hadn't expected this; of course when Bellatrix demanded that she be able to wear whatever it was that she wanted to Cassandra's wedding, she would take the opportunity to do something like this. After all, she always did get a kick out of ruining everyone's day, so why not do it on what was supposed to be the happiest day of someone else's life?
But it wasn't as though Bellatrix had decided to go in some ghastly thing that was soaked in a miserable black; which to be perfectly honest, was what Narcissa had been expecting. No, instead Bellatrix chose to go the complete opposite route, and decided to look so breathtakingly sexy in her glamorous, yet rather risqué floor-length emerald gown that she easily was going to put everyone else, including the goddamned bride to shame, which was… well, you just never looked better than the bride at her own wedding; it was beyond distasteful.
Although, to be fair, Cassandra was rather gorgeous all on her own, and would no doubt look even better on her wedding day, so at best, Bellatrix was merely rivaling her, but still. Her dress, at any rate, would garner far too much attention; it had a dangerously low neck line, was open at the sides, and had a large slit up the thigh and, my God, Narcissa wanted to both kill and fuck her simultaneously. It was incredibly disorienting.
Bellatrix smirked, enjoying the reaction she got from her little sister as she descended the stairs. "You approve then?"
Yes. No.
"How are you—how can you just…?" Narcissa tried, but all that she really managed to do was fumble out half sentences as she practically undressed her sister with her eyes. Still, she had to remind herself that she was irritated with Bellatrix for this, and exclaimed finally, "You're such an arse."
"It does look rather nice in this, don't you think?" Bellatrix asked, sounding terribly amused with herself as she pretended to hear Narcissa wrong and turned on the spot, showing Narcissa her backside. And… alright, it did, but honestly, she was going to make everyone stare!
"Damnit, why do you have to do this?" Narcissa huffed, lightly pushing her sister's arm in irritation. "You must know that dress is much too slutty—"
Bellatrix's mouth dropped open in faux-shock. "Hey, it's tasteful—"
"Barely," Narcissa responded, sounding exasperated. "You know you're treading a fine line, Bella; and more over, I know you're doing it onpurpose. Cassandra's never done anything to you; why are you trying to take attention away from her?"
"Oh, calm down, Cissy; I didn't do this to show her up, I'm just trying to keep myself entertained during what will no doubt be the most boring few hours of my life," Bellatrix defended, sweeping her curls over her right shoulder as she grabbed her purse. Her hair was half done up on one side, this ornate clip sweeping the hair back from her face, and for once her curls didn't look unruly and unmanaged. Really, it was rather stupid how beautiful she looked right then, and Narcissa couldn't stop staring.
She hated her for that.
"Entertained how?" Narcissa ground out, because either Bellatrix was lying to her, or she no doubt was about to reveal another endgame that was bound to irritate her even more.
The brunette smirked then as she pressed the length of her body against her sister's, causing Narcissa's breath to practically leave her as Bellatrix purred in her ear, "You think I don't know what this dress is doing to you? I can practically smell how wet you are, Cissy…"
Narcissa lightly pushed her off of her, irritation crossing her features. "So what, you just plan to bloody tease me all day? That's your grand plan here?" Because it seemed too simplistic for Bellatrix, didn't it? She could tease her any day of the week should she only try hard enough, why was today special?
Bellatrix chuckled, not at all perturbed by her sister's irritation with her. "We'll be surrounded by people all day," she reminded her, looking far too amused by this for Narcissa's liking. "It'd be so incredibly risky, would it not, if we were to steal away somewhere for a quick one off? Someone could see, someone could hear…"
Narcissa clenched her jaw, beginning to understand her sister's point.
And yet Bellatrix smiled wickedly, finishing with a slightly mocking sounding, "I wonder though… would that stop you?" She chuckled then, seeing the resentment in her sister's eyes as she told her, "That's my entertainment, Cissy; seeing how far I can push you until you ultimately snap. I'd consider it a victory if I can make you risk everything just to touch me. So… care to find out?"
Bellatrix held out her arm then, like she was going to escort her as a husband would, and Narcissa just shot her an irritated look before she rolled her eyes, pushed past her, and snapped, "I wouldn't suggest holding your breath over it," because damn her. Honestly, she was having second thoughts about posing for those pictures for her after this; she hadn't wanted this to turn into some goddamn game to find out just how much they could get away with in public.
Bellatrix just chuckled though, following the other woman out the door as she responded, "I never do, love."
[x]
The wedding was beautiful, albeit hardly the social event of the summer; while some of the more dominant pureblood families came, it was only the ones who were directly related to the Burke or Goyle line. Narcissa wasn't surprised though, as it wasn't as though Cassandra or her ape of a husband were very well connected.
Well, perhaps that wasn't entirely true; Goyle was connected to the same people that Bellatrix and Lucius were, but it wasn't as though all of the Death Eaters were friendly with one another and regularly came to all of their member's social events. So the wedding was rather small, which irritated Narcissa on some level because she felt as though she were wasting a perfect opportunity to assert herself into a better position of the social hierarchy; Lucius was away with the Minister after all, which was something incredible to brag about and yet it felt wasteful as the people who needed to be impressed by such a thing weren't even there.
Still, Narcissa did speak to whoever would listen about it during the reception as she seemed to feed off of other people's envy of her. Bellatrix, however, had a heavy eye roll reserved for that and after she was finished telling one of Cassandra's older cousins about how quickly her husband's career has been advancing, Bellatrix came up behind her and breathed in her ear, "You know, you sound like an insufferable prat whenever you brag about shit like that; I'm surprised people can stand being around you."
"They can't," Narcissa responded coolly, keeping her spine straight as she stared straight ahead at the small throng of guests, not deeming her sister important enough in that moment to actually turn around to face her. "They hate me, but they envy me; that's what's important, although I'm not surprised you wouldn't know or understand that. You've always been so devastatingly incompetent in the rules of social politics."
Bellatrix smirked, apparently amused by her attempts to insult her. Moving around the blonde's body, she stood in front of her then, demanding her full attention as she mentioned, "You've been avoiding me."
"Well, you've been rather embarrassing."
Bellatrix quirked an eyebrow. "Because of the dress? Please, Cissy; you're being dramatic," she dismissed, because generally when Narcissa was irritated with her, it was always down to her overreacting. Bellatrix had never been good at validating anyone else's feelings outside of her own though. "People may have stared at first, but they've seemed to redirect their attention to your foul-mouthed little friend, which is what you wanted, was it not? For me not to take away from her on her wedding day?"
Narcissa said nothing, instead choosing to stare past her sister as she watched Cassandra struggle to make small talk with her guests without her atrocious accent. Narcissa was surprised when she first heard her speak, as she thought the woman had completely dismissed all her attempts to help her in that area, but it seemed she was at least trying to listen. It was obvious that it wasn't coming naturally to her though, and Narcissa doubted it would last very long.
"I thought you wanted me here."
"I did," Narcissa hissed, making sure to keep her voice low as she finally looked at her sister; she actually seemed a bit put out by Narcissa practically ignoring her, and it actually took the blonde aback for a moment. Regardless though, she continued, "But first you show up in that dress, solely because you know it would both attract and irritate me simultaneously and, on top of all of that, I just don't… God, I just don'ttrust you right now, Bella. I've already watched you flaunt yourself all day trying to get my attention, and you're being so…" But Narcissa couldn't find the right word, and instead chose to exhale a small breath of frustration.
"You got your way when we're in your home," she told her instead, keeping her voice low so as not to be overheard. "But we can't do this in public, do you understand me? I'm terrified you're going to make it too obvious that you're flirting with me, and so yes, I'm absolutely regretting asking you to come along right now. This isn't a game, Bella; this is my life. Please don't screw this up for me, I'm begging you."
Bellatrix pursed her lips, irritation flashing behind her darkened eyes at her sister's words. Narcissa sighed softly. "Please don't be angry with me," she tried, because the last thing she wanted was to get into a row with her sister. "I love you and I swear to you, I will absolutely appreciate you in and out of that dress when we get home, but right now I just need you to be my sister in a more… I don't know, normal way. Can you please do that for me?"
Bellatrix was silent for a long moment, still looking fairly aggravated with her; after all, she had never been a fan of being reprimanded for her actions. Surprisingly though, she didn't lash out at her over it; instead she steeled her jaw, looking frustrated beyond belief, and forced herself to grind out one singular word. "—Fine."
Narcissa's eyebrows nearly shot off her forehead.
"What? That was the answer you wanted, wasn't it?" Bellatrix responded off of the look she was being given, instantly defensive. "Stop looking at me like that."
"No, I— I mean," Narcissa replied, stumbling a bit over her response due to her surprise, "of course that was what I wanted, but I didn't expect you to be so… agreeable."
Bellatrix just looked exasperated at that though, causing Narcissa to narrow her eyes a little as she peered up at her. Was this part of her sister's promise to be 'better' for her, because if so then Narcissa approved; after all, they could do with less arguments in their relationship, as it seemed the majority of their relationship either had them fighting or fucking. Or perhaps Bellatrix just realized that she had a point when she had brought up that she got her way in her own home, at great personal risk to Narcissa no less, and therefore figured it'd be only fair to stop pushing the boundaries of their relationship any further just because she was bored.
Regardless of the reason though, Narcissa appreciated it. "…Thank you."
"Yeah, fine."
The response was short, distracted, and sounded more like a 'whatever' than anything, but Bellatrix was only forthcoming about her emotions on a sporadic basis; outside of that, she was generally rather defensive and closed off, especially in public. Sometimes, Narcissa wondered if she was embarrassed by being 'nice' to her, as she was never that way with anyone else she interacted with. It must feel strange to her sometimes; to be one way with one person and the complete opposite to everyone else. On some level, it probably made her feel fake; although which persona she considered to be the 'real' her was anyone's guess.
"Bella?" Narcissa asked softly, gently nudging her sister's arm to get her attention. When Bellatrix looked down at her, Narcissa gave her a small smile and quietly told her, "I love you."
That seemed to help, and the corners of Bellatrix's mouth began to curve into a small smile as she noticeably relaxed. But of course the moment didn't last as she responded, "Hard not to in this dress," with a smirk, the statement shortly followed by an arrogant head flip caused her curls to cascade down her right shoulder. Narcissa rolled her eyes at the display.
"You're insufferable."
The smirk on her sister's face grew. "A quality I pride myself on actually; especially since you seem to enjoy it so much."
Narcissa was going to retort, but she noticed Cassandra approaching them now, looking a little overwhelmed with all the attention she had been given today. "My 'ead—head," Cassandra forced out rather awkwardly, before completely ruining her attempt at class by following it with and exasperated sounding, "Screw it. It's bloody fuckin' killin' me, it is. Thinkin' so much before you speak ain't natural; sodding done with it. S'Rubbish anyway; I won't ever be respected anyway, not like you."
"Truer words," Bellatrix muttered dryly, which caused Narcissa to shoot her a disapproving look before she turned back to her friend.
"I know it's difficult, but you were doing really well," Narcissa tried, even though Cassandra's attempt wasn't perfect in the slightest. She had to constantly stop and correct herself mid-sentence which was… awkward to listen to, but perhaps with a bit of practice she could get better at it. "Don't give up; you're still young, and you have all the time in the world to build a reputation for yourself."
"Don't get why it even matters," Cassandra responded, hiking up her wedding dress in a huff so she didn't trip all over the train. "Got myself a proper 'usband now an' everything, and 'e loves me for who I am; only thing that counts, innit?"
Proper was pushing it, but regardless. At least the man was pureblood.
"Narcissa doesn't consider life to be worth anything unless throngs of people despise the very air you breathe," Bellatrix responded, rolling her eyes at her sister's priorities in life. "I wouldn't concern yourself over it; especially considering I find it highly unlikely that anyone would ever hate you for anything that you have anyway. Even your choice in husband is subpar."
"Bella!" Narcissa reprimanded, aghast. God, why did her sister have to pick on Cassandra so much? She had never done anything to her. While Bellatrix might be right on some level, as Cassandra's marriage to Goyle instead of a much more respected pureblood didn't exactly give her a running start, that didn't mean she should just throw in the towel and give up! And it certainly didn't mean that she had to be reprimanded for her tastes in men on her wedding day.
Cassandra however, to her credit, had never really found Bellatrix intimidating; although whether that was because she was brave or foolish, Narcissa didn't know. Instead she just quirked an eyebrow and looked up at the brunette, calmly retorting with, "An' yet you hate me 'cause you're jealous Cissa doesn't pay you all the attention when I'm 'round. Seems I'm doin' alright then, if it's hated I'm supposed to be."
Oh, shit…
Bellatrix's eyes flashed, and Narcissa didn't even have a second to be impressed by the gall Cassandra had, or the very accurate read on her sister's hatred for her, despite not having been around her much, because Narcissa was too busy grasping onto Bellatrix's arm to suppress the woman's instinct to jump straight to violence whenever she was grievously offended. And oh, implying she was jealous of someone like Cassandra was extremely offensive to her.
"Bella, please," Narcissa begged softly, looking up at her sister imploringly. "I beg of you not to embarrass me right now. We are guests atCassandra's wedding; please act like it."
"You honestly expect me to just allow—"
"Yes," Narcissa hissed, pulling her sister to the side as she shot her a serious look. "You started it; you couldn't honestly expect her not to defend herself and retaliate. You were rude first, Bella, now leave it. I will not stand idly by and allow you to humiliate me by getting into a fight with the bride right now, do you understand me? This ends now."
Bellatrix hissed softly through her teeth as she pulled her arm from her sister's grasp, looking at Narcissa like she was some kind of awful person because she was trying to keep things civil. "Do not speak to me like you own me," she snapped back, thankfully at least keeping her voice low so as to not attract the attention of the other guests. "I am here as a favor to you, lest you've forgotten; and if you're not going to appreciate it, then there's really no reason for me to stay, now is there?"
She turned to leave then, absolutely content on not giving Narcissa a chance to try to make her stay, but the blonde grasped onto her wrist anyhow and implored, "Bella…!" This was childish, but at the end of the day, she knew Bellatrix didn't want to be here, and if she continued to be miserable about it, then honestly Narcissa would rather see her go; the reception probably wasn't going to last that much longer anyway. Still, she wanted to make sure of something before she did.
When Bellatrix looked back at her with one arched eyebrow, Narcissa tried, "I understand if you want to leave, but you're still going to… come over tonight, right? Because Lucius is gone, and I…"
"Am physically unable to be alone due to your severe attachment issues?"
Narcissa narrowed her eyes; that was uncalled for. "Are you coming over or not?" All she wanted was to enjoy the small bit of freedom she now had while Lucius was away, because she'd rather have alone time with Bellatrix in her own home than have to deal with Rodolphus being a prick.
Bellatrix shot her an exasperated look. "Obviously. I'm sure you'll cry or throw some kind of fit if I don't, and honestly that's the last ruddy thing I need today; you've already dragged me through enough bullshit for one afternoon."
Narcissa sighed heavily. God, why did she even bother when her sister was in a mood?
"Fine, I'll expect you round for dinner then," Narcissa responded, pointedly ignoring her sister's rude comment. "Please don't be late; I'm having Dobby prepare quail and it gets tough if it sits for too long."
"Yeah, yeah," Bellatrix dismissed with an irritated wave of her hand as she turned, content on not spending a moment longer at this wedding than she needed to. Narcissa exhaled a small breath as she watched her go, disappointed that Bellatrix wasn't mature enough to keep her nasty comments to herself for one more bloody hour. The last thing she wanted was to be left alone, but Bellatrix was growing restless and honestly, it was probably best if she left; there would be far less drama that way.
Or, so she thought.
When Narcissa turned back to Cassandra however, she realized she wasn't alone. Margret Rookwood stood next to her, leaning into the redhead's side as she whispered something in her ear whilst staring at Narcissa. The blonde forced herself not to flush with anger and embarrassment; whatever Margret was saying to her, it certainly wasn't good as Cassandra moved away from her with a scowl on her face and responded in an irritated tone, "So? S'not like it bloody matters."
"It's not like what matters?" Narcissa responded, her voice ice cold as she stared down Margret, hoping to at least look somewhat intimidating. It didn't seem to work.
"Oh, nothing," Margret answered in an airy tone that indicated it was very much something. "I was just noting to Cassandra here how strange it was, that you've yet to rid yourself of that nasty bit of weight you put on after your holiday. You always used to be so skinny, you know? It's such a shame. Although, perhaps what they say is true; once you get old, your metabolism seems to slow to a crawl. It really is too bad that your genes seemed to get there a decade early but, you know, we're all built differently…"
Margret's voice was light and airy as she said every horrid word of that, as though she were merely making pleasant conversation and not purposely making Narcissa feel like she wanted to rip herself open and spill all her horrid fat on the floor. The look on her face must have revealed to Margret exactly how that made her feel though, because she smirked in victory, amused by Narcissa's shame and self-disgust. Cassandra though, to her credit, just looked at Margret like she had to be touched in the head.
"Oi, are you daft?" Cassandra shot back. "She's bleedin' beautiful, she is! More so now that she's got a bit 'o weight on her. Piss off; Peter mighta invited your 'usband but I never wanted you around. Bit like a nasty insect, you are; all tiny arms an' beady little eyes. Like a dung beetle but worse."
Margret, who looked grievously offended by Cassandra's words, just hung her mouth open in shock for a moment as she had to take a second to process the horrible things that had been said to her. Cassandra didn't seem to give a lick about pissing off her guests though and didn't look remorseful in the slightest, and finally Margret just exhaled this infuriated sound before she turned on her heel and stalked off towards her husband, no doubt to tell him how offended his friend's new wife had made her.
"Thank you," Narcissa said quietly, appreciative that Cassandra had stuck up for her, as Margret's words seemed to have rendered her temporarily mute. How was it that she was nearly twenty years old and she was still getting bullied? It was awful; she wished she wasn't so self-conscious about her weight, but it had only been a little over a year since she had been released from the hospital. These things took time. "But you shouldn't have done that," Narcissa continued, glancing over at her best friend. "You'll be the next topic of nasty gossip now; Margret will make sure of that. It will stain your reputation."
"Sod my reputation," Cassandra responded with a shrug. "Know you want the best for me, Cissa, but I'm not like you. Probably best to just accept it now, innit? S'not gonna change." Narcissa didn't want that to be true, although mostly because it made her feel as though she failed,but maybe Cassandra was right; maybe becoming a socialite wasn't for everyone, even if they were pureblood.
"'Sides," she continued, although this time kept her voice down as she continued, "After Peter's group gets the recognition they deserve, things'll be different, yeah? Be like bloody royalty, you an' me, just from bein' married to 'em. You double though, for sure, cause of your mental sister and all. 'Eard she's a bit of a teacher's pet."
Narcissa tentatively glanced at Cassandra out of the corner of her eye as she delicately folded her arms across her chest. They had never spoken about this, the two of them; what their husbands, and her sister, were so deep into. It just never seemed… appropriate.
"You're aware of how dangerous my sister is, and yet you still provoke her?" Narcissa responded softly, sounding very surprised. She assumed Cassandra knew what her husband, and possibly Lucius, was doing – the two men along with the fat one were close, after all – but she hadn't really expected her to know about Bellatrix. "That's… either very brave of you, or incredibly foolish."
"She won't hurt me," Cassandra responded, sounding very sure of that. "It'd make you mad, an' I don't think she wants that. 'Sides, Peter'll kill her if she touches me – or 'least he'd try, brave as he is – an' I'm pretty sure they're not supposed to be killin' their own, y'know? Startin' inter-group wars or whatever else. Bit stupid; won't get anything done that way."
While Cassandra might have a point, as she doubted Voldemort would tolerate violence between his members, Bellatrix had always been different; she'd always been special. And the fact of the matter was, if she wasn't concerned in the least with having to possibly kill Rodolphus, it'd be doubtful she'd bat an eyelash at Goyle or his wife. In the end, she could probably get away with quite a lot, seeing as she was the Dark Lord's favorite.
"Regardless," Narcissa responded quietly, gently placing her hand on her friend's forearm. "Please tread carefully. While my sister may not like upsetting me, that doesn't mean that she won't do so if she feels justified enough. She does not fear being reprimanded for her actions either, because she's very skilled and therefore heavily favored. Please just… be careful, okay? I know she's a bit shit when she's jealous, but I'm sure it'll fade eventually."
To be honest, Narcissa doubted Bellatrix's jealousy would ever fade, but she didn't want Cassandra mouthing off to her because she believed nothing would come of it. Bellatrix might do a lot, and refrain from doing a lot for her, but Narcissa by no means had absolute control over her. And in the end, perhaps it was terrible, but honestly she did fear what Bellatrix would do to Cassandra, should she ever feel more threatened, or deeply insulted by her.
Maybe regardless of how she feels or what Cassandra says to her, Bellatrix truly never would do something about it as she was aware of how much it would deeply upset Narcissa. But in the end, there wasn't a guarantee that even something like that would stop her, and that was what bothered the blonde the most.
She wanted to believe the best of her sister, but at the end of the day, the sad fact remained that Bellatrix… well, she wasn't a very good person, now was she?
[x]
"Alright, strip."
Narcissa's brow rose as she turned towards her sister in question. She had only just finished with her meal and stood up to wash her hands when Bellatrix's order came. The woman was sitting across from her at the table, arms folded across her chest while slumped back in her seat in a rather classless manner, the telltale sign of a smirk beginning to tug at her lips as she looked at her younger sister expectantly.
"Thank you for having me over for dinner, Narcissa," the blonde corrected her pointedly, annoyed with Bellatrix's lack of manners. "It was lovely, Narcissa."
Bellatrix snorted, looking at her like she was mad for even suggesting such things. "What? It's not like you made the bloody thing; and you've got another thing fucking coming if you think I'm gonna thank your elf."
Narcissa sighed heavily. "I wasn't expecting you to extend your gratitude to Dobby; I was merely pointing out that it's polite to thank your host for dinner, is all." Honestly, if she didn't know any better, Narcissa would question how she was raised; but Bellatrix was brought up just the same as she was, and yet for some reason seemed resigned to have atrocious manners. Perhaps it was just her way of sticking it to their mother though.
Bellatrix's smirk widened and she placed her elbows on the dinner table, leaning forward as she practically undressed Narcissa with her eyes. "You know I have other ways of expressing my gratitude, love." Narcissa shot her a decidedly unamused look at that.
"We are not fucking on the dinner table just because Lucius isn't here. That's terribly unsanitary."
"Not what I meant," Bellatrix responded as she slid her chair back to stand. "Although… not a bad idea for the future." She smirked, like she expected Narcissa to actually one day cave to that suggestion and, yeah, right; over her dead body. They ate on that table, they didn't need to… eat each other on that table. How could Bellatrix not see how gross that was? Although Narcissa supposed it wasn't like her sister to care about something like that; she never really was one for forethought.
"Right now though," Bellatrix drawled, coming round the edge of the table in order to press the length of her body against her sister's. One arm snaked around the blonde's waist and Narcissa tried not to shudder when her sister pressed her lips to her ear and finished in a breathy voice, "I'm more focused on you fulfilling your promise to me."
Oh.
Narcissa's cheeks flushed a light pink as she remembered what it was that Bellatrix wanted in return for going to the wedding with her. "You… want to do that now?" She didn't really know why, but she had expected to do that in Bellatrix's house; but perhaps it would be better to do it when they knew for sure no one would ever interrupt them. Even though Rodolphus now knew about the true nature of their relationship, the last thing Narcissa wanted was for him to walk in on anything, and that would always be a concern in Bellatrix's home.
"Lucius won't be home all weekend and besides, you look absolutely delicious in that dress," Bellatrix purred, fingers splaying out against Narcissa's stomach as she gently kissed beneath the blonde's ear. She smirked wickedly then and finished, "Also it'd amuse me if you were naked and on display in pursuit of my dirty little fantasies on the bed you share with your prat of a husband."
Narcissa rolled her eyes, exhaling a soft sigh as she reminded her, "It's not a competition, Bella."
"Of course not. Because if it was, then I'd be winning," Bellatrix responded arrogantly, chuckling a little to herself as she pulled away from her sister. "And that's something you're afraid to admit to yourself, because then you'd realize your marriage is a sham. Now come on, love; we have naughty photographs to take of you." She held out her hand in offering then, causing Narcissa to exhale an exasperated breath before she ultimately took it; she didn't want to get into this now, it just wasn't worth it.
Because while yes, Bellatrix was correct in assuming that she came first in Narcissa's eyes, that didn't mean her marriage was a sham. It was far more complicated than that. Narcissa suspected Bellatrix knew that as well, considering the blow out fight they had last year over loyalties, but perhaps this was just her sister's way of forcing the importance she needed to feel in regards to the other woman; and seeing as the last thing Narcissa wanted to do was make her feel less so, she opted to keep her mouth shut. They were generally so much happier when they did that anyway.
After they got upstairs and Narcissa retrieved her camera for her sister, Bellatrix nodded towards the vanity and directed, "Over there. Stand in front of it and look in the mirror." Narcissa's brow knitted.
"You don't want me on the bed?" Bellatrix had specifically mentioned the bed, did she not?
Bellatrix shot her a look like she should know better. "Cissy, this is probably the only time you're ever going to let me do something like this, and if you don't think I have a specific vision for it then you'd be dead wrong. Now do as you're told."
Narcissa shot her an unamused look at basically being ordered around, but in the end this was Bellatrix's show; she was just the puppet in it. So Narcissa did as instructed and crossed the room to stand in front of her large vanity, looking at herself in the mirror. Despite the wedding being hours previous there still wasn't a hair out of place and Narcissa breathed a sigh of relief; if she was going to do this, then she needed to look immaculate in the pictures. She wouldn't be able to be okay with it any other way.
"Alright, now take the straps of your dress off your shoulders and kind of clutch the fabric to your chest like this," Bellatrix told her, demonstrating as she fisted her hand in the fabric of her own clothing. Narcissa's eyebrows rose, surprised by the request.
"I thought you wanted something… well, much more inappropriate than that." Because that would be almost… it'd almost be classy, and that did not seem like something that would interest her sister in the slightest, so why was she doing this?
"Are you going to question every little thing I ask you to do?" Bellatrix asked, sounding exasperated with her as she let go of her dress and looked at the blonde incredulously. "Seriously, Cissy, just fucking do it, alright? My reasons for wanting something like this are my own."
Narcissa narrowed her eyes, not trusting the fact that Bellatrix refused to give her a proper reason, but eventually did as she was told and slipped the straps of the dress off of her shoulders, bunching the fabric between her breasts as she held it to her form. Looking at herself in the mirror, Narcissa bit down softly on her bottom lip to suppress a smile that was peeking out; she actually looked rather beautiful like this.
The distinct click of the camera reminded Narcissa why she looked this way though, and when she looked over her shoulder at her sister, Bellatrix took another photograph. "You could model, you know; you're prettier than all those hags in Witch Weekly by far," she said casually as she adjusted her position, the compliment making the blonde blush softly.
"Stop it; you know that's not true."
"Of course it is, don't be stupid," Bellatrix countered, scoffing as she dismissed her sister's insecurities. She nodded her head towards her then and instructed, "Now drop the dress; just let it rest around your hips, yeah? And then kind of…" The woman came up behind her then, gently taking Narcissa's wrist in her hand as she guided the blonde's right arm across her chest, covering her breasts. "Yeah, like that. But look down a bit; I want those stray curls you've got hanging around your face to frame it."
A strange feeling began to invade the pit of Narcissa's stomach, and in that moment she honestly didn't know why. She should be enjoying this, shouldn't she? It was so much better than some classless pornography that she was expecting to be the star of. Perhaps the problem was though that she just didn't understand why it was happening in the first place because it seemed so terribly unlike her sister, and so Narcissa looked over her shoulder at Bellatrix and asked softly, "…Why are you doing this?" She knew the other woman didn't like when she asked questions, but she just had to know. Something about this felt off.
And at first Narcissa thought Bellatrix was going to shut down her curiosities again, but instead she just placed her hand on the small of her sister's back, caught her reflection in the mirror, and breathed softly into her ear, "I desire far more of you than your cunt, you know. You are breathtaking, Narcissa; is it so wrong of me to want proof of that?"
"'Proof'?" Narcissa asked quietly, her brow knitting in confusion. It was an odd word to use, after all. Bellatrix clearly did not need to prove her view of Narcissa to herself as she already thought she was something desirable, so then who was the proof for?
And then she understood.
"You're doing this for me… aren't you?" Narcissa breathed in realization as she turned in her sister's arms to face her, not really knowing how to feel about that. Was this a gift, or something else entirely? "Why?"
Bellatrix pursed her lips, and whatever façade she was trying to portray to Narcissa finally cracked as concern shone behind her darkened eyes. It took a long moment, but finally Bellatrix exhaled a breath and admitted the driving force behind her actions. "You didn't eat your dinner," she told her, sounding so terribly gutted about something that she once used to willingly allow, just so Narcissa could make her own decisions in her life. The time of Bellatrix just standing idly by was over now though, so of course it would make sense that she wouldn't ignore it if she saw the signs again. "I watched you; you just pushed it around on your plate… did that shit where you try to talk my sodding ear off just so I'll be too distracted to notice the fact that you aren't eating everything. I'm also pretty sure you hid some crap in your napkin."
"What?" Narcissa asked, sounding genuinely surprised by that as she took a small step back from her. It sounded like such a foreign concept to her for some reason, but she also knew that Bellatrix wasn't lying to her. She wouldn't have cause to, after all. "I… I'm sorry," she apologized, feeling incredibly embarrassed about her actions. "I didn't mean to make you concerned for me; I didn't even realize I was doing it. It wasn't like I was trying to—"
"You were," Bellatrix interrupted, not letting her make excuses. "You might do it subconsciously sometimes, but you do it for a fucking reason. You obviously feel like shit about yourself right now and I just… I don't know, I wanted to fix that before you spiraled back into that crap again. Because I can't watch you kill yourself anymore, Cissy; I won't. I fucking won't do it."
Narcissa swallowed the sudden lump in her throat, casting her gaze down on the floor. "What happened?" Bellatrix asked softly, after realizing Narcissa didn't have much to say in response. Placing her hands on each of her sister's arms, Bellatrix tried to garner her full attention as she pleaded, "Cissy, tell me."
Narcissa just shook her head though, feeling foolish. "It's not—I mean, it shouldn't… It doesn't matter; I'm just being ridiculous…" Childish, even; someone's comments shouldn't affect her in this way, not anymore. No one should ever have that much power over her, so why was she still allowing them to?
An unexpected and rather violent sob ripped its way out of Narcissa then, who quickly placed her hand over her lips as she exhaled, "I'm supposed to be better; why am I not better, Bella…?" She felt like she was falling apart and it was so sudden that she wasn't prepared for it in any way. All she could do was bury her face in her sister's neck as Bellatrix wrapped her arms around her form, fisting her hand in her hair as she held the blonde to her.
"You are," Bellatrix assured her passionately. "Cissy, just the fucking fact that you can see that what you're doing to yourself is wrong proves that. But there isn't some magic fix for your head, love; if there was the Healers would have done that. It's gotta… I don't know, come from inside or whatever that rubbish is, you know? You gotta love yourself first."
Narcissa sniffled, feeling another tear run down the contour of her cheek. "I hate this," she breathed. "Sometimes… sometimes I feel okay, you know? I look at myself and I don't think my weight is so bad, but then… but then someone says something and I just…"
"Fuck other people, Narcissa; do you hear me?" Bellatrix responded, pulling away from her a little so she could catch her gaze. "What they think doesn't sodding matter, and you know they're only saying that shit to hurt you, so why are you letting them? You're stronger than that."
Narcissa shook her head, feeling rather defeated. "I don't think I am…" she whispered sadly, but her chin was roughly taken in her sister's hand then, forcing her to look up at her.
"You are," Bellatrix told her fiercely, refusing to accept any other answer. "Narcissa, you are so much better than they are and you know that. Don't ever let them make you fucking believe otherwise."
Narcissa pursed her lips, looking up at her sister sadly. She wished she could believe her, but in that moment she didn't feel as though she was better than anyone. Bellatrix sighed softly though, reaching out to wipe away another tear that fell down her sister's cheek. "Sometimes I just wish that you could see yourself through my eyes, even if just for a second. You'd finally see then how fucking beautiful you are; no one even comes close to you, Cissy. That's why I was trying to do that stupid shit with the pictures; I wanted you to… I don't know, just see yourself for once. Like really see yourself; the real you, and not whatever distorted image it is that you see when you look in the mirror."
Narcissa sniffled, feeling herself smile softly at her sister's words. Bellatrix might not believe herself to be the best lover in the world, but it was when she did things like this that she proved herself wrong. She had a chance to get her to do all sorts of naughty things for the little photography collection she was starting, and yet instead she chose to try to help Narcissa's self-image. Bellatrix sacrificed her own reward just to try to make her sister feel better about herself, and that spoke volumes to Narcissa.
Crossing the distance between them, Narcissa softly pressed her lips against her sister's, allowing her eyes to fall closed. "You are more than I could have ever asked for," she breathed when they parted, gently resting her forehead against Bellatrix's. "Thank you. Thank you for trying. That means more to me than you'll ever know."
"I'm not done trying," Bellatrix responded with a smirk when she was met with a slightly confused expression. She stepped away from her then, grabbing her camera once more as she encouraged, "Come on, we'll never know if it makes a difference or not if we don't finish. Besides, I do at least want one shot of that cunt of yours; it's only fair, after all."
Narcissa rolled her eyes, but exhaled a small laugh regardless. Still, she tried to protest with, "I look awful," because her makeup was surely running down her face now; her cheeks all splotchy and eyes bloodshot from crying.
"So then put on your face," Bellatrix responded, not about to take no as an answer. "Cissy, you have no idea how much you look like a goddess to me right now," she breathed, gently touching her face as she encouraged Narcissa to meet her gaze. "So let me show you."
Narcissa felt like she could burst into tears again just from that one sentence, but managed to contain herself. Still, her heart swelled and a fierce heat ignited in her chest, and in that moment, she so desperately wanted to believe her sister's words. She wanted to feel as beautiful as Bellatrix believed her to be; she wanted to see what she saw, and not whatever screwed up image her tattered self-esteem had been projecting upon herself for all these years.
So with a small nod she turned, momentarily leaving to freshen herself up in the bathroom. After all, she had nothing to lose should it not work, and everything to gain if it actually did.
TBC…