So I've gotten a few shots of flack for the lack of combat prowess Natalie has. Honestly, if you think she's weak, your right. Her physical inability when compared to other vampires is a very core aspect of her character. Its why she has the "skill set" she does, why she sees the world as she does, and is essential to her motivations.

Twilight, the cannon, focused on the "special" vampires; those with insane abilities and incredible potential. The entire point of this OC was to introduce a rather mundane or average vampire to the world. From her physical ability (or lack of it) to her "gift", I designed her to be a painfully average or uninteresting vampire. Only her mind is extraordinary, and her knowledge of the world is nearly unrivaled.

I suppose I should say this now. If you are expecting her to turn into a badass fighter, don't. If you wish to see her become insanely powerful, you're going to be disappointed. What you are going to see is dynamic character development for all the people in my fic that stay alive. I want to provide a unique perspective on Twilight, one that can't be replicated or compared easily.

I'm really sorry about the wait. I just had to focus on the finale on my real account. A whopping 22K finale at that, add in post-semester school laziness and than school itself...

Really, super sorry.

Without further ado, I present to you another chapter. Review please? c;

I got to mother fucking 50 follows! Hellz yeah!

Just A Nomad

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true.

- James Branch Cabell, The Silver Stallion, 1926

Faint sobs echoed through the dark chamber, and I turned from my work bench to look at the pathetic sight I created. Held in place by a combination of chemicals, starvation, and highly durable steel restraints, a female vampire lay spread out on a concrete table. The female seemed to have accepted her fate no more than a few days ago, but the fits of crying had yet to fully subside.

I wasn't worried in the least. It always stopped, be it by my own hand or their minds shattering.

"W-Why?"

Ah. The question always asked. I was growing tired of it, but this one seemed to be a bit more intellectually inclined, so it might still yield a more interesting result...even if it was unlikely. This would be the twenty-third vampire to be under my sometimes metaphorical but often times literal scalpel.

"Why not?" I replied without the smallest hint of interest. Casually, I walked at human speed over to the table so I could watch her react to my words. So far vampire psychology was disappointingly similar to humans'.

Outraged coal black eyes directed an immeasurable amount of loathing towards me. "Because it's cruel! Immoral! Unnecessary!" I do have to admit I find the vampiric vocal cords fascinating. Even when under extraordinary stress, the voice rarely cracked like it did in humans. If vampires were the next step in evolution, then what did that small detail imply?

Was empathy and sympathy a thing of the past? Would emotion be replaced with stoicism?

The ability for humans to pick up on subtle and overt social cues is what the human social experience is built on. Without that, humans would find it next to impossible to determine how someone else felt about something, or to even read other people for insight on how to approach a situation.

Sure, everyone knows to comfort a crying maiden. However, if tears are not shed, and only the crackle of a voice can give the female away, then does the disappearing of that trait signify something? So far vampires acted like humans did towards animals when it came to the species we came from, with a few notable exceptions such as sexual relations.

"-ot even paying attention, are you?"

Looking at the stone ceiling, I sighed and wondered how old this castle must be. Europe was riddled with castles that had merely token patrol forces to keep peasants out, but that would change as the possibility of war continued to increase as Napoleon consolidated his power.

"You are at least two-hundred. Those concepts are not unfamiliar to you."

She sputtered. It occurred to me that I didn't even know her name. "What does that even mean? Well shit! Other people are messed up in the head, why don't I get to be too?! You're insane!"

I felt an eyebrow twitch. My comment went right over her head. "I didn't deny any of what you said. I can get what I want without all this, but I prefer this method because its quicker. Besides, it's silly to call an amoral being immoral. What I do is not right or wrong, it is only an action."

In a futile attempt to release her rage, the weakened vampire thrashed and growled. "You're fucking sick! What do you even want?! Some empty thrill from this twisted 'game'?"

"You know what I seek. I already told you."

"Go to hell with your verbal evasion! You must feel so superior, looking down on all us people who give a damn about the world."

I hummed a bit in mild thought before answering. "I do indeed feel superior, but not for the reason you believe. It is interesting...remarkable, even, how beings who would be rejected by the world they live in wish to protect it. I'll forgo the physical trials I had planned if you interest me enough with your psyche."

"You-I-Fine." She fumed, but didn't say a word after that.

"Good. First question. Why do you still cling to life?"

Confusion filled black eyes, and the orbs darted around the equally dark room. Night vision is such a blessing.

"What? I don't think I'm close to death. I don't feel all that bad. At least not yet..."

"Hmmm. Most say that. The compound I'm keeping you incapacitated with is toxic enough to kill a human in under a second. Form of bacteria, actually. Found it in Prussia. Anyway, have you ever wondered why vampire venom causes temporary paralysis?"

The conversation lulled, and the woman took a second to realize I was genuinely curious on what she thought about in her spare time.

"Not really. Most people aren't as messed up as you."

"Curiosity is not a sign of illness. At least not for any known disease. The venom is so toxic to vampires, but not humans, that the vampire body is forced to deploy every defense in its arsenal to keep the toxins from spreading. It could also be an allergic reaction to foreign venom, though that wouldn't explain those who bite their partners for play and pleasure..."

Out of habit I began to pace, nearly unaware of the condescending eyes that followed. "A large part of how our bodily functions deals with the brain. From the hardness of our skin to our ability to heal. Did you know a vampire with a will to live will heal faster than one without? Its fascinating. The cells actually mend wounds faster or slower due to an altered state of mind!"

"Great. You are a mad scientist. Plan on taking over the world anytime soon?"

I paused long enough to send a look of disdain her way. "Hardly any of you are remotely interested in how our own biology works. I bet you don't even know what flows through your veins." I remarked that with a special measure of smug. I was rather proud of that discovery on my part. She only chuckled a bit.

"Idiot. Our hearts don't pump. Nothing flows anywhere."

I tsked a bit at her confidence. It always annoyed me how sure in themselves the ignorant were.

"Common misconception. Our blood is a mixture of our own unique venom, embalming chemicals, and a kind of pheromone that drives animals away while attracting humans. Its why humans can hardly resist being around us, no matter what their instincts might be saying." I paused for but half a second. " Here's a question. Do you think we are naturally occurring with a definitive point in the fossil record, or are somehow artificial?"

A look of complete confusion crossed her face, and I rapidly began to lose interest in our compromise. At the very least I could go back to the original question if for nothing else to see her reaction. "I think it's obvious vampires are some unnatural thing. I mean... How could a human become a vampire without divine intervention?"

I gave her a pointed look.

"This is the question I seek an answer to. Your answer isn't uncommon; its indeed the official opinion of the Volturi as of late. I just want to know how we work. Back to the original question...once you lose all will to live, the toxin will cause you to die almost instantly with little pain. As it stands you're in a kind of limbo; the body is unable to completely destroy the compound in your current state, but the mind is too stubborn to let it go."

"That's good to know. I guess. What's the next question?" A twinge of anxious fear was seeping into her voice.

Moving over to my workbench, I picked up a tool far beyond the age I lived in. A device that had a circular saw for the head and could easily fit into the palm of the hand. It was essentially an electric bone saw. Even in this situation, vampire skin was astoundingly resilient, so I had to make my own instruments to do the job.

The stronger the will, the harder it is to break skin and cause sustained damage. Time to see how 'strong' this one would be.

"There isn't going to be one. You aren't unique in any way, so I'll be foregoing any further mental assessments."

"B-But we had a deal!" I snorted at that. No we didn't. "I said if you interested me I would forgo the experiment I have planned for you." I chuckled a bit. "Besides, even if I did make a deal, why would I bother following it?"

"You bastard!" The struggling began anew, but it was futile. She essentially had the strength of an experienced infantrymen; not near enough to break steel. Lucky for me too. That stuff is a pain to make.

"My parents were happily married, thank you." Honestly, I was a bit giddy to try this out. It was going to be a rare first time and internally I was buzzing in excitement. This experiment would prove invaluable no matter the result, and would provide a much more solid base for future psychological and physical tests that explored how deeply connected the mind and body of a vampire were.

"You won't get away with this!" Growls of anger and strain echoed off dark walls, and I heard a small creak from the metal bindings. I felt my eyes involuntarily widen in surprise; that shouldn't be possible! In under a second I put my invention back, darted over to this vampire and cocked my fist back before snapping it forward, breaking the jaw and causing pain to flare through the mind rather than fury.

The screeching of her scream replaced that of the steel, and momentarily I felt relief. I could break more bones, but that might allow for her to bend her way out of captivity, a possibility I would not risk for anything.

Time to get this started, and quick. I only had an hour long charge with my crude batteries, and swapping them out was quite the delicate process. Something that had to be done at normal human speed, if not slower.

Grabbing my electric saw I used my free hand to keep my charge's head still enough for me to get a clean cut. Flipping the device on, I was quick to place the rapidly moving metal to skin. The screams were almost enough to make me deaf for some time, but I just kept cutting.

I shot up from where I was laying and smacked forehead first into someone. They let out a feminine yelp and reeled back as I groaned and placed a hand to the side of my head, closing my eyes in an attempt to reduce the severity of my pounding headache.

I remember that experiment. I extracted the brain and placed it in a jar with fluid that would accurately simulate the inside of a vampire skull, after a month I placed the brain back in the empty cranium along with the fluid and waited after putting some blood in her system.

In an hour she woke back up, but in a newborn state, increased strength and all. I only just succeeded in talking her down so I could evaluate what she remembered.

All two hundred years of her vampire life, gone. All memories of her human life, gone.

It was a fascinating result to say the least...

Yet, in my chest I felt something other than curiosity begin to bud. It was heavy, almost a burning sensation, accompanied by a dropping in my stomach.

Was this...guilt?

A giggle brought me back to reality, a bell like sound that was inexplicitly beautiful. Must have been Alice. Opening my eyes to yet another set of unfamiliar surroundings, I tried to ignore my growing annoyance at being in this situation and faced the small vampire who by now had recovered.

"What happened after I blacked out?"

Alice tsked in a small show of displeasure. "Always so serious with you. Natalie, me and you need to talk about something called relaxation." Looking around, I saw that I was in a cabin of some sort, with a fire burning in a stone fireplace and giving a homey feel to it all. "Until you dragged me into this Victoria drama, I was doing what I pleased." I closed my eyes and rubbed my forehead, trying to reduce the throbbing in my head.

"W-We didn't drag you into anything!" Oh, she sounded offended. Great. "Your Bella's friend, right? So you should try to help her!"

I sent her a one eyed, half hearted glare. "I can't fight to save my life, if you can't tell. My assistance would be more of a hinder than help." The pixie was smart enough to know that, at least I thought she was. "Natalie...you can't just not try to help. That's wrong." Now she sounded and looked sad, perhaps disappointed?

I closed my eye and sighed. "And why not?" My voice held a tired tone to it. I had heard people say this about friendships and loyalty since my coming of age centuries ago, and all of it was illogical. Based on emotion, sentiment, feeling rather than coherent thought. If my help was going to have a net negative result, then there was no reason for me to help. What I would be doing is hindering.

"Because friends help friends!"

"Even if that help causes more difficulties?"

"It's not guaranteed! You only think you will drag us down, when really you know more about vampires than anyone in our family."

I took an unnecessary breath to counter, but then I stopped.

Did I hear that right?

"Did you say 'our' family?" I opened both eyes and removed my hand from my head, intent on seeing if that was a slip of the tongue or a legitimate consensus. I could tell the question made Alice uneasy. She shifted her weight from left to right and darted her eyes around the room.

"Maybe I did, and maybe we want you to be a part of our family, but we can talk about that later!"

"Who exactly is 'we'?" I asked with narrowed eyes. The only Cullen I interacted with extensively was the one before me, and Bella if you were to count her. It seemed odd that anyone else would care enough to want me to join their family.

Alice let out a very unlady-like groan. "Can we please not do this now? There are more pressing things we need to talk about."

"I thought I was the one who was all business."

The other vampire 'hmphed' and crossed her arms, looking more like a kid caught with the cookie jar than a deadly, decades old creature of the night. "Stop being difficult."

I sat up and slumped my shoulders before continuing to massage my forehead. This headache was astoundingly painful. "You're the one avoiding questions. Do you have any blood on you?"

I heard her let out a small breath and then felt something plastic drop onto my thigh. Without a second thought I used my free hand to lift the blood bag to my mouth, poke two holes with my extended canines, and started to casually sip on the human blood.

I might have let out a small whimper as I felt my body begin to rapidly right all the previous wrongs. Unconscious vampires were still a thing I had yet to fully study, but it seemed like all healing outside of the skin and brain was halted.

I also 'felt' Alice stiffen. More like I just knew from the noise of tightening fists. It was a... most curious sound.

"Sorry that this gets to you so much. You could always stop breathing you know."

The small vampire sat next to me on the small bed, her near non-existent weight barely forcing the cushion to cave.

"I know, but this is how we hone our control."

I gave her a one eyed glace before returning to my meal in silence.

Now that I had time to think about it, I could see why a few of the Cullen coven would want me around for much longer, perhaps even permanently. I was valuable in that I knew more than their current leader about vampiric nature and could help them maintain their current 'Don't eat humans' lifestyle with greater ease.

I could also share my knowledge about vampiric psychology; how regeneration, skin hardening, and sensory manipulation worked. Give them advice on non-lethal anti-vampire weapons (which boiled down to simple sensory overload or suppression) and even give them some considerable political power to keep the Volturi off their back with all my documents from back a few hundred years that would make the current leadership look bad.

Of course, I doubt they knew about that last one, though Carlisle might suspect it.

Downing the rest of my drink I turned my head to face the small vampire beside me as I put the empty plastic bag down.

"How long was I out?"

Alice turned her head a bit so she could glance at me then looked back to the fire across the room. Her body was slowly relaxing and her breathing was much less shallow. Their control around human blood wasn't nearly as flawless as I had been lead to believe.

"Two days. Leah saved you and that small girl from Victoria. After some research we found out her name as a human was Bree. Bree Tanner to be exact. We currently have her under house arrest at our home and she's been very cooperative but less so in giving us information on what Victoria is up to."

Alice paused to give me time to ask any question I might have. I only had one.

"Is Leah okay?"

A ghost of a smile passed over her features before dissipating. "Yes, and the tribal politics across the border is heating up. Jacob is getting increasingly restless about how you are being treated, and with him being the genetic heir to the pack...we fear there might be a civil war of sorts soon."

"I see."

A silence. It was neither comfortable nor tension filled. Somewhere in-between. It stretched into minutes and I turned my gaze to the flames Alice was so enthralled by. With our enhanced vision vampires saw the world quite differently than humans. Colors that normally blended together became distinct; the normal orange of a fire was replaced by reds, yellows, and a kind of white that all came together near the core of the flame.

It was beautiful to watch. The swirling of color fight, blend, and ultimately reemerge only to repeat the process.

"Natalie...this might be a bit out of left field, but I have a question that's always nagged at me ever since Edward told me what he thought about vampires."

"I'm sure whatever he said it was only partly accurate and mostly misguided, but please, ask away."

A half-hollow giggle, then a deep breath.

"Do you think...Ah, how to word it. Do you think Edward is right? Are we actually soulless monsters meant to roam the Earth until the end of time, or are we more? Is our fate to eventually succumb to our insatiable desires or to rise above? With people as they are, can we ever coexist or are we to forever live in hiding?"

"I think that is more than one question."

Alice scratched the back of her head and gave an awkward laugh. "Yeah. I guess it is."

I already had an answer to these questions mostly asked by self-loathing, usually religious vampires. It assumed things not yet proven and made moral judgments; the question was loaded and mostly only had one answer due to the context it was asked and the person who was asking it had a personal preference on the matter.

My apprehension to cast my usual answer came from the vampire who was currently asking it. Of all the vampires I have come to know or have met, she and perhaps Emmet were the last I thought would even consider this line of reasoning.

No matter how apathic I wanted to be to the world around me and to morality, my time with this unique family was changing me. For the first time in many, many years my heart felt alive; it didn't beat, I knew that, but the bursts of emotion I could now feel made my body react in ways I hadn't truly felt since my human and newborn days and the Leah debacle.

Guilt, love, fondness, exuberance, happiness, contentment, hatred, anger, hurt and so much more; Alice, Bella, and Leah were all causing radical changes in my paradigm. I had yet to fully grasp the magnitude of this change within me, but right now I could only describe what I was feeling as hurt.

My insides felt crunched up and my chest was heavy. I almost wanted to cry, strangely.

I hardly felt a twinge of curiosity at this sudden inquiry.

All I knew was that Alice, the happy, bubbly, ever exited Alice was contemplating questions only someone who loathed what they were would ever entertain.

It was wrong. The very idea was alien, but to hear and see it was downright heart breaking.

A flood of determination went through my entire being. No matter what I would force her to see the error in this self-destructive questioning.

"Why?" My voice almost cracked under the stress of newfound feeling. Almost, thankfully.

"It-it's the kids Victoria is using." A wave of anger came over me at the mention of that vile woman. "They aren't anything like the kids at school. This is the first time any of us except Carlisle have seen child vampires, and the ones he met were with the Volturi, so of course they were tamed, but the ferocity...the willingness to kill in people so young to the world...I just can't bear to see it."

That didn't make much sense. All over the world kids were being used as soldiers in gang wars, wars between religious sects, and the infamous child-soldiers of Africa. It wasn't a new phenomenon for seemingly innocent beings to be monsters in sheep's skin.

Alice looked to already know what I was about to say.

"I know about all the atrocious things people do to kids, and the horrible things they do right back, but this is different. Ingrained in their very being is the thirst for blood, the need to kill to survive. Doesn't that make you shiver?" Alice hugged herself in an effort to calm down. "Bree and her brethren is everything that is wrong with Vamperism, and even though I think covens like mine are the best examples of vampires, we still make mistakes. We still have the base want to drain every human we see. I just...it's hard to find any redeeming qualities in what we are. It makes me think turning Bella might be the wrong thing to do. It makes me consider how Rosalie feels, and I see her point."

A silence came over the room then.

I willed a witty, valid, airtight counter to flow from my lips. Nothing came.

The presentation of the worldview many Cullen's held when explained made sense, as much as I wanted it to be false. The premises and conclusions lined up to form a very coherent, very persuasive and ultimately self-destructive ideology that would end only in self-hatred and rejection.

The problem wasn't our nature, it wasn't so easy to just say 'that's wrong because your good people' or 'your kind, you're a vampire, so all vampires cannot be monsters'. When put into the overarching morality all the Cullen's shared those short, unsophisticated answers just would not work.

I took a deep breath, mind running at near light speed to find something.

"I've studied our kind for a long, long time." I started, considering the words I was about to speak with great care. Alice listened with complete attention and eyes filled with hope.

I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I let her down here.

"In all my years, I've never met a coven like yours. You operate like people, not predators. You feel and enjoy the complete range of human emotions and of the human experience as best you can. You care, deeply, about those you know as family and for the anonymous masses you feel guilt for wanting to harm them."

I glanced over, seeing her simply nod her head. She knew all of this, but she wasn't truly understanding how unique they were. I sighed in mild exasperation.

"It amazes me to no end how ignorant you all are on how unprecedented your behavior is for vampires."

The pixie scrunched her face into something akin to offence.

"Doesn't that support what Edward's been saying?"

I smiled. I could sense the normal Alice coming back from the doubt lingering in her voice.

"No. Your family is evidence that our species can rise above the simple indulgence of our base instincts. That vampires don't have to kill people, don't have to feed off humans and don't need to kill each other over petty disputes."

She huffed and flopped back onto the bed.

"You make us sound so great. We make mistakes and-"

"Who doesn't make mistakes?"

Alice opened her mouth, paused, then responded.

"Most mistakes don't end up with ruined lives."

"Most people aren't able to flip cars and crush granite with their bare hands."

She sat up and leaned onto my shoulder. She might be close, but Alice needed one more push.

"Stop looking at your potential failures and look at your potential successes, Alice. Your family could lead humanity towards a brighter future with the collective knowledge and study of centauries. You could cure diseases, save those unable to save themselves, and be shining examples of what humanity, not vampires, are capable of."

This felt odd, wrong, almost. My entire life was spent as a subscriber to a somewhat (completely) amoral philosophy. Altruism and heroism were and still are acts of foolishness by naive people unable to come to grips with how cruel people can and would be.

There was no rising above self-interest. It would always win. My moral paradigm is incompatible with hers on such a base level its almost unbelievable that we are close friends.

Yet here I was, trying to convince her that her moral convictions were right and she should be the change she wished to see rather than give into a self-defeating train of thought.

Life is weird.

"I..." Alice's spine straightened. "Your right. I'm right; nobody gets anywhere if we're too busy worrying about how we might fail." She let loose a breath and stood up. "Thank you. I really needed that."

"Don't mention it."

She giggled.

"Now I just have to convince you to go full veggie." I stood up, stretching aching limbs accompanied by a small groan. "Good luck with that." Bouncing slightly on the balls of my feet, I continued to feel the blood flowing through my system rapidly heal my entire body. "With that out of the way, where the hell are we?"

Alice tossed my another bag of blood before answering. The hell was she hiding that at? "Cabin some ways away from Forks. With Bree in our custody Victoria must be trying to rally those Newborns back around her."

"So Bree was constantly using her gift to keep them in line...that's impressive use for someone not even a year old. Is she and your family getting along?"

She threw me a half-hearted glare. "'Our' family, thank you, and yes. The only trouble we're having is keeping her under wraps and watching her constantly. Kinda hoping you can help with that last one?"

I hummed in false consideration. "Mah. Sure, no harm in helping out there. How are shifter relations?"

"Tense, but cordial. Carlisle has negotiated a temporary lift on your ban from Forks due to the Victoria situation. Hopefully we can make it permanent."

"Any chance you guys snatched my stuff from Seattle?"

"Already back home."

A lull in conversation; I used it to meander around the cabin and took notice that I was wearing new cloths. How kind of them.

"Ready to go?"

Downing the remaining blood, I nodded.

We bolted into the cold Washington night.

-kjhahsdfkajsd

Slowing to human speed near the Cullen's doorstep, I noticed a distinct lack of Bella scent.

"Who's been watching Bella with you tied up here?"

Alice threw me a sideways glance. "Shifters; primarily Jacob and Leah, oddly."

I didn't find it particularly weird, but I didn't comment, though a single question finally came to mind.

"What, exactly, do you expect me to do with Bree?" We paused with her hand on the doorknob.

"Honestly, we want you to be her full time sitter until we find her trustworthy, or until Victoria is dealt with. With you having the least amount of combat experience and skill, its best we keep you from the frontline but close enough to react should anything go wrong. Any flaws in that plan?"

I looked up at the cloud filled sky in mild contemplation. There were a few, but only a single glaring one.

"Your assuming I can control her should she decide to help her creator."

"You took on me and Emmet, I think you can handle her."

Fair enough. I decided not to point out they hadn't been coming at me with the intent to kill.

As we finally entered Alice's home my mind began to race with possible experiments I could conduct with Bree's gift to see how far her band of mind manipulation could go. Well, that and my usual screen of dauphin anatomy accompanied by various insect matting patterns. I added a few famous writings to ensure it wasn't entirely unbearable for the resident mind reader.

I'd always wanted to explore vampiric gifts thoroughly, but the issue was that I couldn't use my gift on anyone, so I was stuck having someone use their gift on me. Trusting another, especially a vampire, enough to allow free use of possibly potent abilities wasn't, or hadn't, been practical for me until recently.

I didn't trust Bree, but I did trust, to varying degrees, the members of the Cullen clan. Should anything go truly wrong I trusted them to step in and diffuse the situation. Add onto that the fact that Bree's gift isn't lethal, nor capable of manipulating the mind in terms of altering or reading, meant there weren't any real negatives to finally testing how mind to mind links worked with Bree.

From the little I did accomplish in the past, I knew those with mind based talents were operating on a two-way road. Theoretically, it was possible for Edward to read my mind as I read his in the same way the shifters did. Seeing as the mind reader was capable of reading multiple minds at one time, it also meant that he was, again, theoretically able to become a conduit of communication between those he was reading and himself.

The problem was that you fist had to find the connection mind-manipulators or readers made. The reason those with gifts like Bree and Edward were so potent was because you could not find and thus sever the link between the two brains. The only reason I discovered this two-way connection was due to my turning of a set of twins who ended up getting halves of the same power. After a few years of mentoring they were capable of linking their minds followed by linking to a third party and then using the full range of power between the two of them on the third party.

Unfortunately, their ability was being able to find the true intentions behind actions, so they were understandably pissed when they discovered I thought of them as simple subjects soon to be discarded rather than fellow coven-mates.

I didn't teach them any fighting abilities. Without newborn strength and with me spiking their food with toxins it had been easy to dispose of them.

My chest filled with regret as I thought back on my actions. Maybe I should have been a tad more compassionate. Perhaps instead of turning them with only the intention of ending them I should have found a home for them. Maybe treated them better, too.

But that would have made long lasting enemies capable of tracking me down; no amount of niceties would have overcome the feeling of betrayal.

The last thing I needed were vampires capable of finding me.

Yet...

It didn't feel right. Something inside of me was screaming at my mind for justifying such actions. Actions it felt were damning, heinous; immoral.

Morality was a thinly veiled attempt to make one self feel superior to others and sanction otherwise unjustified action on those who you simply disliked or disagreed with. I knew that was the case; I'd witnessed it unfold before my very eyes decade after decade.

Everyone had a God on their side.

Everyone was moral, upstanding, and in the right.

When everyone is moral nobody is. Only the mentally inadequate or damaged think what they do is wrong and continue anyway. There was no objectively good or bad, right or wrong. So I had simply put it aside without much of a second thought after one-twenty years of existence as a vampire.

Now, things were changing. Previously held tenants of vampirism were crumbling under the weight of the Cullen family's will to be human. An entire ideology I'd made the core of my existence for centuries was being brought into question; was it possible I had been wrong all along?

That thought didn't sit well with me and I physically flinched at the sinking of my stomach.

"-atile?"

Snapping to attention I saw Alice, Edward, Jasper and Bree staring at me.

How mortifying.

"Sorry, what was that?"

Edward cleared his throat while I thought Jasper might have narrowed his eyes a fraction. My skin crawled under the intense focus of their gifts on my mind even though I couldn't feel it.

"I asked if you have any questions or requests before we hand her over to you. We'll try to accommodate best we can since this isn't an ideal situation."

Perfect. I needed someone I could trust by my side for as long as possible.

"I would like Alice to stay with Bree and I so long as she isn't needed elsewhere. I would also…" I paused and seconds ticked by in silence. I noted Alice vibrated in excitement, Jasper deflate a bit, Edward tense, and Bree fidget as I tried to get my emotions under control.

Leah…

My undead heart was heavy with a longing; need, really, to be near the person it loved without condition. My mind lectured that being close would only cause the dulled emotional pain to flare, making it incredibly hard to work effectively on something I had waited more than a few decades to test.

I would be risking throwing it away for a woman I had a very slight chance in ever getting yet would forever shadow like some kind of undead stalker.

Which is precisely what I was. But details.

It was then that something occurred to me that I should have realized much sooner.

Leah was in the exact same damn situation as I was.

I literally face-palmed and groaned in frustration.

I was making this so much harder than it needed to be in my attempt to make it easier and have less drama.

Fuck it. Fuck it all.

"I need Leah to be near me. If we have to move off property for that to be possible, that's fine."

Alice squealed.

I sighed in external exasperation.

Internally?

Well, on the inside I felt an emotion well up that hadn't shown its face in what seemed like forever.

Hope.

So, this story isn't dead. Nothing I write ever truly dies.

Remember that. I finish everything I write, the question is time.

Again, so sorry about the wait. I'm not completely content with what I produced given the time I had to do it. It is what it is though.

Review please? Much thanks given.