I'm not dead yet! (Man, I wanted to try that one! :D) I'm sorry for the very late update. It's almost a year since I last updated this, and the last chapter too. As for my other stories, they're not dead fics. I'm still working on them. First year of college really kills you, and I just finished it! Now I get free time and I'll try my best to update my other fics.
Okay, *deep breath* here I go! Thank you to XMyLifeIsADisasterX, Evaporated, Maltrazz, danni98, MysteryConan, purebloodragdoll, ShadowCyclone, Danny Longstride, KudoAi, Kudo2315, IIorangeII, Diabl0s, Alieu5569, insanewriter1220, vienx.001, hai-edogawa, Killthief99, Sherrys Fan, Lajoie, Perla, tuki (this is a cute name ;D), Guest #1, Ai Queen, Guest #2, and last but not the least, IamAiQueen. *Inhales* Thank you all!
Disclaimer: I NO OWN... Oh please... *roll eyes*. All mistakes are mine alone.
And presenting the last chapter of Crazy Little Thing Called Love!
-Chapter 10-
It was quiet down the lab. Only the sound of tapping on the keys and occasional flip of papers were heard. Haibara focused on the task at hand, even though her initial work is already unreachable and abandoned. She's doing everything she can to forget what just happen a few moments earlier. That stupid detective waltzing in and demanding answers from her. Her initial reaction is to ignore him and return to work but his stubbornness knows no bounds.
'I shouldn't have done that' she thought, her fingers stopping and rested themselves on the keyboard.
Sure, she noticed his lingering gaze and warm smile towards her and she always dismisses the fact that it's just his friendly nature and all. He's so nice to everyone that one might mistake it for another. She doesn't know the current status of the detective and Ran but from her professional point of view; they're not together. This idea gave her some kind of hope. Hope that maybe the detective will notice her after all. Or maybe he already have.
She shook her head and continued to type. She shouldn't make high expectations if she doesn't want to get hurt. But her conclusion that he might have something for her is always backed up by those moments where he manage to make her feel light and just plain happy. Those butterflies she didn't know she have and the sudden rise of blood to her face whenever he smiles at her. She doesn't even know if the detective notices it, which she assumes a yes, but thinks that it might be something else.
After all, he's perceptive of everything else except his own feelings.
Her hands stopped once again and fought the urge to touch her lips. She wished the detective will just forget it, she could tell him that it's a joke. Just like her other fake confessions. But who is she kidding, even she won't forget the kiss after hundreds of years.
She just have to face the consequences of her actions tomorrow…
Or maybe the day after. She could skip classes tomorrow and just tell them she's not feeling well.
Haibara woke up with a start as her alarm clock went off. She tapped the clock with more force than necessary before pulling the blanket over her head one more and catch a few more Zs. After a few minutes, just as she was about to fall asleep, her phone rang.
She pulled a pillow over her ear and tried to ignore the insistent sound of her phone. After the third repeat of her ringtone she decided that her sleep is officially over and that she should get ready for school. Still under the blankets, she picked her phone up and looked at the screen.
"Ayumi-chan" she greeted with her still sleepy voice.
"Ai-chan, I just want to ask if you're okay now. You missed school yesterday and Conan-kun-"
"I'm fine, I just…" she sat up and yawned before slipping on her slippers and heading down for breakfast. "I slept in"
"…" silence was Ayumi's reply and Haibara noticed that something's bothering Ayumi.
"What is it?"
"It's Conan-kun" Haibara suddenly panicked. What if their encounter two nights ago is the cause? How will she explain? Deciding that jumping to conclusions will not help her she decided to play it cool.
"What's wrong with him?"
"He's carrying a book around. He started carrying it yesterday and he won't let us know the title or what it is about. I know that it's not that of a problem but… he's been talking to Jean a lot rather than us." Ayumi's voice is full of worry. Conan hanging out with Jean than their group is a big deal for the girl because it'll be probably the reason Conan will leave them.
"What does the book look like?" she decided to focus on the problem while she served herself a cup of coffee.
"Hardbound, it's just plain black. Probably two hundred to three hundred pages thick. That's it, it's just plain. He always writes on it during break and snaps it close whenever we tried to sneak a peek. I already thought that maybe it's his diary or something but Conan-kun doesn't like keeping diaries, remember he misplaced the small diary I gave him and never found it? I don't have any idea on what it could be" Haibara tried her best to think on a very suitable reason on why Conan is carrying a book around. The information Ayumi gave her is clear that it is something personal. Since diary is already out of the list, the only thing she can think of is that maybe he's writing a story or just writing his observations. Whatever it is, it is so sudden.
"Ai-chan?" Ayumi called when the scientist failed to respond.
"Oh, I'm just thinking… maybe he's writing a story? Most amateur writers shy away from others while their work is still in progress."
"Then why is he talking more to Jean than us? We can give him more ideas" Ayumi felt betrayed and hurt on that thought.
Haibara stood up and looked at the breakfast Hakase left for her. A note beside it that reads, 'Ai-kun, don't forget to eat breakfast. I brought strawberry yogurt, it's in the fridge. –Hakase.' She grabbed the plate and placed it in the fridge while pulling out the yogurt before closing the appliance.
"Can you talk to him, Ai-chan? He seem to open up to you more than anyone of us. I'm really worried that he's keeping something from us"
Haibara wanted to say that she should let him do what he's doing but Ayumi's desperation on knowing what's wrong about their friend is making her feel guilty. She sighed.
"Alright, I'll talk to him later" she would regret this.
"Thank you, Ai-chan! Oh, I have to hang up it's already time. You hurry up too!" then she hung up.
Haibara placed her phone on the counter and opened her yogurt. She still doesn't know how to approach Conan and ask about his weird book. It wouldn't be weird if she knew even if she'd been absent yesterday because she assume the detective noticed the worried expression on her face.
She sighed. Another awkward moment ahead but for now she will eat her strawberry yogurt.
Time passed by fast as Haibara thought of ways to approach the detective without making it awkward or forced. She could just walk by him and ask about it because Ayumi wanted to know. That's a first, but the detective will be more secretive than before if she openly says that she knows and is interested so probably the last resort. Moving on. She could talk to Jean, but then again she's not comfortable talking with her. She sort of… annoys her.
…
…
Okay, she admits. She's jealous of her. She's not used to seeing Conan with another girl so close to him except for Ayumi and Ran. He's also open to her and that was the only privilege she had after all that happened to them and before he met Jean. And she kissed him for Christ's sake, he didn't even respond! He just stuttered and stared like the dumb detective he is. What irritates her the most is that moment at the back of the school. The scene just keep on repeating and repeating in her head like a broken video. He hugged her and she hugged him back, the smile on Jean's face as she whispers in his ears and the way Conan relaxed in her embrace.
It makes her so… angry.
"Hey, feeling better?" a voice interrupted her thoughts and turned to the person who just spoke.
Conan stared at her while hanging his bag at the side of the table and taking his seat. He only broke contact with her when he pulled the suspicious book from his bag and placing it on the desk. She noticed his smile as he touched the cover of the book before returning his gaze to her.
'What is so important in that book that it makes him smile?' she thought. Her curiosity is already building up, Ayumi's phone call and worry does have a basis and not just exaggerated and overthought.
"Yes, just a cold" she said as she opened her notebook to doodle. From the corner of her eye she saw Conan open the book halfway, the front cover ninety degrees, hiding the rest of the pages from her. He looked behind him if ever someone is trying to see before returning to his book. He shielded the book with his arms, head, and shoulder from prying eyes while writing.
"Ai-chan!" Ayumi called from the her desk, she gestured her hand for her to come.
Haibara raised a brow when Conan closed the book when she stood up. He looked at her briefly before looking around. She continued her way towards Ayumi, taking the vacant seat beside her.
"See? He's hiding something, even from you!" Ayumi whispered her disbelief. She looked at Conan and saw him writing again. Haibara followed her gaze and saw him look at them for a second before burying his nose into his book.
"I also saw drawings when I happen to get close without him noticing. I saw a… a gun! Then papers then cans… I can't really see the connection but I think it's dangerous. Maybe he got himself into trouble again!" Ayumi held her hand like it's the only thing keeping her from tearing the book away from Conan.
Gun, paper, and cans? Haibara clearly remember that those things were present when they first had their case. The first time they met. Her brows furrowed. Is he writing about his life? That would be ridiculous because it will take him years to finish it, months is he's really into it but still…
Haibara took a glance at the book. He's already past half the book. He probably wrote until his hand bled because writing on a three hundred paged book and doing half of it in a day is just plain… ridiculous. She knows that some might say it's possible but those people really have the determination…
Conan stood up and closed his book. He tucked it under his arm and walked towards Jean who's leaning near the door while talking to one of their classmates. He showed the book to her but did not open it. He just pointed at it while talking to her. Like asking for 'what's next?' and 'how will I end it?'
"He's always doing that. After talking to her he would return to his seat and continue writing." Haibara looked at Ayumi and saw tears threatning to fall from her eyes. "I'm so worried but I can't ask him because he won't tell me."
Haibara doesn't have a lot of weakness, except for her sister, animals, children, and apparently, Ayumi. She doesn't want to see her cry because it reminded her so much when she was still a kid. Her sister would tell her that everything is going to be alright and she would stop crying. Now she knows why her sister does stupid and dangerous things whenever she cries.
She suddenly stood up and walked in front of Conan's desk. The latter quickly closed his book and looked at her.
"What are you writing in there? Is it something stupid because we can't help you if you will not let us see" she said firmly, a hand on her hip.
Conan looked everywhere but her. His hand twirling the pen nervously.
"I'm not doing anything dangerous, I'm just… writing a book" he muttered the last.
"Then if it is just a book, why won't you let us, at least Ayumi-chan, see? You're making her worry for nothing" she glared at his lack of eye contact.
"I… I can't. I want to but I can't… Not now…" he whispered, his head bowed down.
"Show me" she laid her hand palm up in front of her, asking for the book.
Conan almost missed what she said in the noise of the room but her hand tells him what she wanted. He pulled the book from his desk and held it against his chest.
"No" he finally looked at her, his gaze steady. Telling her that his decision is final.
His answer irritated her. He didn't even invent some sort of excuse like he always do. He just right out refused. She moved her hand to tell him to surrender his book.
He stood up, book still held against him.
"No" then he looked at Jean. Haibara noticed this and was about to snatch the book and take it by force when Conan muttered.
"I can't… Jean…" soft as it was, Haibara still heard it. She doesn't know what possessed her to lose her calm, the next thing she knows is that the room is dead silent and that everyone is looking at her with surprise. She looked down and noticed her hand on Conan's table. She just slammed her hand hard on it that the numbness she first felt gave way to the pain.
"What is so important in that damn book that you can't even show us?" she exclaimed. It didn't matter if everyone is witnessing her outburst. Didn't matter if the Ice Queen snapped at the poor detective for a stupid book. Didn't matter if they'll be news tomorrow. All the matters is that he should tell her everything.
Jean noticed Conan's pleading stare and decided to help out.
"Ai-san, I think-"
She raised her hand to silence her. Her breathing started to return to normal from her sudden outburst. The embarrassment of the moment started to seep in. Her actions returning to her. She just needed to say her last request and she'll walk away. She looked at Conan with nothing but her blank stare, her hands open in front of her.
"At least let Ayumi-chan read it"
Conan's gaze alternated from Jean and Haibara. His heart beating erratically in his chest. Is this the moment where he should just surrender or should he hold his ground? The silence didn't help at all, their classmates seem to enjoy watching the usual stoic woman lose her temper, and over a book at that. He could see Jane mouthing, 'let her see' behind Haibara. He sighed.
"No," he started and Haibara lowered her hand.
"I understand, but you should explain to Ayumi-chan why-" She stopped. Conan grabbed her wrist and dragged her out of the room. Every eye following their stride until they disappeared at the corner.
"Ai-chan…" Ayumi whispered as their classmates started whispering about the two who just walked out of the room.
Jean, on the other hand, has a big smile on her face.
"Edogawa-kun!" she tried to pry her hand from his vice like grip while he dragged her behind the school. The same place where he saw Haibara and Mitsuhiko.
He released her hand and while Haibara's massaging her now red wrist, Conan handed her the book. Haibara looked at her, surprised at his surrender.
"I'll just have to say, it's not yet finished. I still have a lot of things to add…" he looked at her as she opened the cover. There is not writing on the first page and the second page. He started at the third page where the title is written.
'The Most Cheesy Book I'll Ever Write' was written on it. Haibara raised a brow, is this the book he's hiding from them? She decided to flip the page and start reading.
"I'm not used to talking about something as sensitive as this to other people. My parents are open to it but I won't hear the end of it. Okay, as the title says, this will be the cheesiest book I'll write (probably the last). Jean talked me into writing what I wanted to say to you because she said she knew that I won't be able to form a sentence when I just say it so… here it is."
Haibara was surprised at the use of 'you', like the book is just intended for one person. The person he's supposed to give it to. Did she forced him to show her a book intended for another? She subtly shook her head and continued reading.
"The truth is, I hate you when I first met you. You're so quiet and suspicious, hell, you even fired a gun and joked that you killed Hakase. Who wouldn't hate that right?"
Okay, now she knows that it is intended for her and the reason he doesn't want anyone else to see. This book… this three hundred paged book is intended for her.
"I didn't trust you, you're a member of the organization even if you betrayed them. You've been them a long time and I don't expect you to just change in a snap, well in your case, using a pill. Then you said that a diskette might hold the key to creating an antidote and it's somewhere in professor Miyano's house so I decided that we should get it before anyone else could. But after we arrived, professor Miyano is already dead. This case is as puzzling as any of the cases I've handled, I handled harder cases than this to tell the truth, but I can't seem to see the point where they all connect. That one puzzle piece that is keeping me from solving this case. Then out of nowhere, you walk up to me saying that I should give up, that the case is what it is, an accident. You place a chess piece on the recorder and started to walk away. And that's how I solved the case. You unintentionally gave me the final piece of the puzzle. Even though you kept on contradicting my explanation, I was able to get through it and bring professor Miyano's murderer in prison. I felt proud of myself for doing my work.
But you suddenly spilled the news. That the person shot near the pier, the person I wasn't able to save, is your sister. You blamed me for it, for being such a good detective but isn't able to deduce you sister's plan before Gin killed her. You held on my shirt as you continued to cry. Hakase and inspector Megure looked at us in surprise and confusion but you continued to cry. I just stood there, not even offering soothing words or holding you back. I let you spill all your sadness into my shirt. Even though I didn't move, even though I just stared at you…
I will never forget the first time you cried. Those tears that came out form your eyes was because of my incompetence. From that day on, I promised myself that I will do anything just to protect you. To keep those tears away from your eyes…"
Haibara can't believe what she's reading. It's not about his life as she first thought, it's about the first time they met. His feelings at that time and his thoughts. His unvoiced promise and his secret plan to make her smile everyday. She flipped to the next pages. She stopped at the drawing of a castle.
"It was stupid you know? I didn't know what happened back there that made me want to stare at you."
Haibara frowned, she missed the topic this sentence is talking about. She turned back a page and found the start of the paragraph.
"Then the kids ran upstairs. They peeked out of the large window to see the whole chess game happening at the garden. Those big black and white chess pieces on a checkered lawn showed me a code that is waiting to be decoded. I pulled out my pen and started writing. Ayumi called from the other room to tell the two that the view is much better there so they quickly scrambled out of the room. That is the time you decided to come in. You walked straight to me and peeked at the notebook in my hand. I remember you saying, 'It's a code right? Exactly the way you like it'. Then you looked up, you face inches from mine. 'Right?' you said again and I couldn't say a word. Like my brain just focused on one thing.
You're beautiful.
Then Ayumi shouted from the other room, 'Hey! What are you two doing?' that I thought she meant us but in reality was Genta and Mitsuhiko who were about to fall from the window. You quickly pulled back and ran out of the room to help them, I followed too after a few seconds. It's stupid you know? I didn't know what happened back there that made me want to stare at you."
Haibara bit her lip to prevent a smile from showing. Conan remembered exactly what happened that day. She scanned the other pages. Written there were the moments they were out camping or solving a case. The Case at the football stadium where the murderer threatened to kill the audience. He laid down the details on how she helped him and held the kids while he went out snooping. What his reaction was and what he felt when she said she's eighty-four years old but is actually eighteen. The feeling of faint butterflies fluttering around his stomach when she said, 'just perfect for you' after confessing her true age.
There's also the one in the old cinema. How he panicked as she laid her head on his shoulder. He didn't know what to do because he needed to go and they're laying their head on his shoulder. Haibara blushed when she read that he could have stayed if it was only her laying her head on his shoulder.
Every moment they spent together on or of case is written there. She couldn't believe how a person can remember so much detail if it wasn't important to them. She flipped the pages again and stopped on a drawing of a rooftop with falling snow.
"I don't know what to do. Hakase just lost contact and the last thing he said was you're being shot at. I ran as fast as my short legs could. I don't know what will I do if ever I arrive late. I promised to myself that I'm going to protect you but that promise seems to be broken then. They got you and I was not able to do something about it.
I arrived at the rooftop and saw you leaning on the wall, bleeding. My heart constricted and I couldn't breathe. They already hurt you. Anger rose within me and before I can stop myself I shot my tranquilizing needle at Gin. I know it won't make him sleep because of his thick clothes but at least it will buy you time to escape. You followed my order to go back in the chimney, falling and hurting yourself in the process. But you trusted me so even if you know that it's a dead end, you still followed. I will not let you down.
Haibara skipped a few pages before she continued reading. She couldn't believe how many pages each of their meetings take. Even a simple visit at Hakase and the one minute he saw her took two pages, back to back.
"The room is on fire and Pisco is still trying to find me. I wrap my jacket around you and carried you out of the building. You're safe now. I got you. I held your wounded hand to reassure you that everything's going to be fine. You're almost unconscious and I know you just barely made out with your life there. As Hakase helped me to lay you on the back seat of the car, that's the moment I felt that you're truly safe. Then you started talking about leaving because they already saw you. No, you can't leave. No…
But that same thought is the reason why you must stay. They know you so they will assume that you'll leave. That gave me the reason for you to stay. I wanted to tell you that you can't leave. I won't let you."
At that moment, tears started forming in her eyes. These revelations are foreign to her. Sure, she dreamt of him confessing his feelings for her but that's only in her imagination. Reality is different and it is the ultimate pill to make you realize that dreams are just that, dreams.
"Hey… Wh- why are you crying?" Conan panicked. He didn't write something depressing that didn't happen, did he? He doesn't understand why she is crying.
Haibara shook her head and continued to read. She flipped to the last page that has writing on it.
"Today, Haibara came to school. I missed her already even though I saw her two days ago. I miss everything about her. I miss her sarcastic comments and glares. I miss how her lips would curl up at the corners to from a smirk. Her eyes that shows her true feeling even though she does well in hiding it from her expressions. I can tell when something's bothering her by the way her eyes darts from an object to another as if in thought, her eyes would dull for a minute before Ayumi distracts her with another topic. When she's happy, her normal stoic face forms a subtle smirk and it stays there all day, her eyes would light up instantly and the turquoise color will stand out excellently. Her mere presence calms me, even though we went through a rough moment when we fought a few days back.
This book is almost finished but I still have a lot to say. A lot to discover about her. She's just"
Haibara frowned. The sentence seems… cut. Interrupted. She looked up and saw Conan staring at her with a nervous look.
"That's when you came up to me, I never get to finish that sentence." He said while shifting his weight from left foot to right. "I never got to say any of those things to you because I thought I would never get the chance to"
"Why-" would you write an entire book about us? She couldn't form the words as the reality of the moment sinks in. This is no dream.
"I have a lot of things to say to you, a lot. But I seem to forget some parts of it when I try to verbalize it so I wrote it down to the very last detail. A- and as you can tell… I- uh, I li- like… no, I- um… ah…"
Haibara chuckled as she watched the detective who wrote an entire book about them stutter in front of her. He might be a smooth talker when it comes to cases and other things but she won't like it any other way if her detective started sweet talking other girls.
"I wanted to say that, uh… I, I li… no… uh" Conan scratched the back of his head as he tried to spit out the words he wanted to say to her a long time ago. He stopped stuttering when he felt Haibara's grip on the lapel of his blazer and gently pulled him closer towards her.
The kiss was never like their first one in that dark basement. No. This kiss is not the result of an interrogation or bad judgment but a result of the realization that they've been head over heels in love with each other but was too dumb and stupid to tell, for Conan, and acknowledge, for Haibara.
"Now what were you saying?" a smirk appeared on her lips, her eyes bright. Just like Conan wanted it to be.
"I don't like you" he started. His hands wrapping around her petite body, holding her closer, "I love you"
A/N: OOC? Thank you for reading! (And for sticking around for almost a year! :D)