Chapter 10

I had been frantic. I had returned from my morning tasks to find her gone. There was no note and her phone was still beside the bed. The guards knew nothing of her disappearance and all I could feel from the bond was that she was in pain. The pregnancy was somehow blocking her location from me.

I destroyed two cars and up rooted three trees in my anger. I had everybody looking for her but there was no sign anywhere. As the day drew on my anger and panic grew. I could feel her weakening and I was helpless. I did not like being helpless.

Then Compton calls just as I am informing Pam and getting all vampires to join the search. I raced to his house through the skies, ordering my car to follow me.

The first thing I saw was the blood and everything inside me died again. In that second I was re-living every nightmare I had ever had. I forced myself to focus until I knew all the facts. I could hear her heart beat and that calmed me slightly. She was at least alive...for now. Seeing her smile at me was all it took. My fear and dread turned to fury. I saw the pain in her eyes and her beaten body. I wanted to kill. I wanted to kill. I wanted to kill everyone. Instead, I smiled back trying to give her my strength. She was so weak and I looked forward to the time when she would let me turn her and become as strong as me.

The doctors assurance that the baby was fine seemed to calm all of my wife's distress and it eased mine too although it came as no surprise she had protected our child. That was what she did. She protected those she loved no matter the cost to herself. I listened to the doctor's instructions and thought that perhaps she was trying to communicate something to me without distressing my wife. I couldn't work it out. I was too busy trying to keep control of the desire to kill.

I hardly noticed Bill as he offered to help bring retribution, my thoughts on getting her home. She needed to rest and then I would demand to know every little detail. She claimed the culprit was dead, that it was over but I would make sure. I would force all involved to suffer the wrath of a Viking. But first rest.

I put her on the bed and fed her my blood. It wasn't easy, much was spilt, but she swallowed automatically. I placed her in the bath and washed her clean of her wounds. I wouldn't risk tasting her while I was in such a blood lust. Once she was clean I laid her on the bed and wrapped her in blankets and sheets so she could keep warm. She didn't stir once. I lay next to her keeping my arm over her protectively. My mind raced as I tried to formulate plans to seek my revenge but I did not have enough information. The monster in me longed to wake her and demand to know everything but I could not be that cruel. I wanted her to rest.

"Eric?" Her voice was timid and still a little pained but she sounded stronger. I smiled down at her.

"I am here." I stroked her golden hair away from her face and she hummed at my touch.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that but I couldn't think of another way." I could feel her remorse through the bond but I did not understand her words. I was desperate to know but Ludwig's words rang through my mind. She is to stay calm and relaxed.

"I need to know what happened." My voice was colder than usual and I had not intended it to be so but I had been waiting for fifteen long hours. Sookie sighed and tried to sit up. She was still weak but I helped her up and she seemed quite comfortable.

"I know. You're not going to like it." Her face was the picture of guilt and I wondered what she could possibly have done to make her look at me that way.

"Tell me," I urged.

"Well Jason called me saying he had been taken and he needed my help." I tensed. Every muscle in my body locking down to try and control the maddening rage. Of course the worthless brother was involved. "Well his call was cut off and I was scared that he was being killed so I didn't have time to think of a plan. I popped to him and he was chained up in some sort of torture chamber. It was some girl who he had dumped but she was a witch!

I got him out of the chains but she came back and punched me. I don't know how she got to be so strong but she punched me in the stomach and I was thrown across the room. She tried to use her magic on me but it didn't work. She was going to kill us both but all I kept thinking was she was going to kill my baby. I didn't have chance to think about it. I killed her. All my anger just sort of exploded out of me on to her. I wanted to destroy her and protect my family." She took a deep breath as if trying to calm herself. My mind was red with blood lust. I wanted to rip this witch apart for hurting her. I could barely control my body and my hands were clamped into tight balls.

"So she is dead," she continued and it sounded like she was trying to distance herself from the telling of the story. "I grabbed hold of Jason and popped us to his house. The place was a mess but I figured it didn't matter. I dumped him on the bed and wished him to forget everything that had happened. I was going to just pop back home but I drained faster than I thought and everything went black. I woke up in the cemetery and it hurt. I couldn't call out or move, I was too weak. I just lay there as the pain got worse. I was so scared that I was going to lose the baby. I don't think I have ever been that scared before. But then Bill came...you know the rest."

"How did you get there?" The bright proud smile she gave me was totally out of place in this story.

"I think the baby did it. The last thing I remember thinking was I wish I was at home and then I pictured gran giving me a hug. I think the baby knew I needed help and was trying to take me home." I looked at her astonished. I couldn't think about that right now.

"Sookie how could you have been so foolish?" I didn't want to admonish her but all I could picture was her cold, dead body lying limp in my arms. I couldn't get the image out of my head or the cold, desolate feeling. The black hole. Where love and joy had turned to pain and grief. The endless abyss of torture. The feeling I had knowing she was gone and aching for her with every cell in my body. That feeling was set in my heart and my whole existence flared with the need to prevent such pain again.

"I know, I should have stopped to think but he is my brother Eric. I had to save him. What was I supposed to do? I didn't have time to waste and I acted on instinct. It all worked out." She shrugged her small shoulders and I felt my ire rise up again.

"You should NOT have gone without me. You should NOT have used your powers and you will NOT be doing anything like that again. I forbid you to leave the house until you have fully recovered and then you are going to take things very steady as you have been told!" I was shouting at her now and I felt my fangs extend fully in my anger. Her eyes widened at my reaction and I saw her nostrils flare. She jumped out of the bed and headed to the door. I was faster and blocked her exit.

"Get out of my way Eric." She spoke each word slowly and deliberately.

"NO! You will get back into bed!" She looked up at me and I could feel her own anger raging.

"I get that you are angry. I get that you were scared. I am sorry but you WILL NOT tell me what to do!" She began tugging on my arms to try and get me to move. I knew that she was too weak to use her powers and pop out so I just stood firm.

"Do as you're told! Get back into bed." I commanded. She stopped tugging and looked up at me. In her eyes I saw the depth of her fury. It matched my own and it was wound intricately with her stubbornness. And then her eyes seemed to empty of everything for a second and were replaced with...vulnerability?

I couldn't believe what he was saying. No one ordered me about like that. No one! Especially not Eric Northman! Who did he think he is? I was still feeling pretty lousy otherwise I would have popped my ass to the other side of the planet by now. As it was, I was totally trapped. I tugged on his arm trying to get him to budge but I knew it was futile. He wouldn't move and I wasn't strong enough to make him. There was no way I was going back to bed now though. I tried to think of the best plan of action but my mind was consumed with the pain and feeling of hopelessness. I began to feel like a caged animal and an almost claustrophobic fear washed through me. I had to get out. Now!

I began to see things. A dark room. I was chained to a table and the mocking voice of Steve Newlin laughed above me. I felt sick.

A car trunk. Two hands gripped me and a blinding pain shot in my neck. I was going to die.

A large room filled with dead bodies. Blood was everywhere and bits of flesh was scattered amongst the debris of a falling down building.

The eyes of a deranged killer. His hands around my throat as he tried to choke the life out of me.

I screamed and lost all feeling in my body. Everything went black.

I caught her just as she began to fall. She lost consciousness so quickly and I couldn't understand the cause. One minute she had been standing up to me in true Sookie Stackhouse style. A Valkyrie. My own little warrior goddess, maddeningly stubborn and pigheaded. The next minute she is an empty statue screaming and falling to the floor.

I placed her back on the bed and began to pace. I didn't move my eyes from her expressionless face. I didn't have long to wait. To my horror it got worse. Her face twisted in pain and she began to scream again. Her eyes remained closed but she began thrashing and writhing on the bed as if she were fighting for her life. I gripped her arms to try and stop her from hurting herself but it was no use. I couldn't stop her I could only hold her still. Her skin was like fire under my fingers and I noticed that sweat was pouring out of her, coating her in a sticky sheen.

"What did you do?" The dwarf demand in an unforgiving rasp. She had injected my wife with some sedative that had calmed her but the look on her face was very worried.

"I didn't do anything! What's wrong with her?" I was holding one of Sookie's hands in mine, she was still too hot.

"What exactly did you say to her?" I could see that this was somehow important although I didn't see why I needed to disclose our argument to the dwarf I began to tell her.

"...And I refused to move and told her to get back in bed and that's when she collapsed."

"You fucking idiot! I say don't upset her, keep her calm and you talk to her like a common fangbanger. Well you will be pleased to know that your little tirade could very well kill her."

"NO!" I gasped. "You have to help her? What's wrong with her?"

"I told you she had to be kept calm and relaxed. You think in your thousand years you have known pain, known suffering, Viking. This girl has felt more pain and suffering than any other creature on the planet. Ever! She has never really dealt with any of that mental baggage but she was so strong it didn't really matter. Now, thanks to her hormones, her body is filled with a maelstrom of emotion that she cannot control. That kind of emotion has an impact on the mind. Your little demonstration of male dominance made her feel weak and helpless. You trapped her causing all those nasty repressed memories to come flooding back. With her powers and the babies too I was worried she might need some help but you managed to throw her into a complete psychological meltdown. Congratulations!" Her words were filled with venom but I couldn't get upset at her impudence. I had harmed Sookie. My foolish pride and useless fear had caused her to be in this pain. I had to help her. I had to do anything I could to help her.

"What can I do? There has to be something I can do?" I was almost begging and that seemed to thaw the dwarf slightly.

"She is in a psychiatric fever. The only way she will survive is if you can pull her out of it. You will have to be very nurturing and affectionate. Show her nothing but love and peace. She will suffer fits. You must talk calmly to her and make sure she does not harm herself. She will suffer high and low temperatures, you must compensate. If you can ride it out until she can regain consciousness you should be in the clear but it will be far from over. She will remain weak. There will be sickness, headaches, panic attacks and even self-harm. Can you handle that Viking?" I nodded mutely. Stunned into silence by the enormity of what I had done. I had not had any insight into the depth of my wife's suffering. I had not known the burden she bared while carrying my child. I had not understood the delicate line she was walking. I had feared the worst and it had been my fear that had pushed her to the edge. My love would have to pull her back. I only prayed, to every god I could think of, that it was enough. It had to be enough.