A/N: You guys tempt me to write an AU story where Lorelai doesn't die and Seth/Brennan don't split, haha. I don't know if I will, because people get pissy if a story doesn't end up with B/B, but I'm still rather tempted.
You guys might get pissed off at me for this chapter. I promise I'll make it up to you by throwing in a lot of B/B fluff in the future.
This is where you find out how Seth and Brennan break up. I assure you, as one reviewer predicted, that Seth does not die. I promise you'll find out what happens to him if I write an epilogue.
Reviews are stellar, by the way. Yes, this is me, being shameless. C:
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After visiting Lorelai, Booth allowed himself to breathe a little easier. To feel a little less guilty for living his life. He knew he should have gone to talk to her a lot sooner, and a lot more often, but he didn't want to take those few steps to getting over her. He knew, deep down, that he would never truly get over her, but the idea that there might be a moment, just a moment, where he would think of something other than her frightened him. She was his life and he felt as if he would be doing her an injustice to allow himself to consider other things, to allow her to float to the back of his mind. It was sick, and he was going to pay hell for it later, but he didn't know what else to do.
The week that followed, Booth was forced to fill Sweets in on everything he needed to know when it came to lying for him about Lorelai. And it came in handy- everyone was curious to know what one of their own thought about the "mystery wife", and although Sweets wasn't happy having to lie about it all, he did what he needed to do for Booth's sake. Sweets was well aware that Agent Booth was having a harder time than most when it came to coming to terms with his wife's passing, and he knew that he had to let him come out with the truth on his own. It would do no good for Sweets to out the secret, so he kept quiet and played along. It all came in handy, too- sure enough, Angela, Cam, Daisy, and even Hodgins were intent on squeezing every last detail from Sweets. They all received generic answers- Lorelai was lovely, shook his hand, invited him in, and offered him a drink. They all sat around and chatted and from what he gathered, she was everything Booth had talked her up to be. The Jeffersonian Team ate it all up, but after a few days, the buzz died down as planning for Brennan and Seth's wedding picked up the pace.
Over the next three weeks, things seemed to rush by so quickly that nobody knew what was going on. Without Brennan's knowledge, the team had fixed it so they would be receiving no new cases until after the honeymoon, but Temperance was so distracted that she hardly even noticed, which astonished Booth. He was named one of Seth's groomsmen, with Hodgins being the best man, which was fitting since Angela was the maid of honor. There was wine tasting, cake tasting, tuxedo fittings. Brennan put up a lot of fits because she found the whole process to be absurd, whereas every new venture was as exciting to Seth as the last. Everyone else found it quite humorous, how they were so backwards from the traditional couple. Brennan wasn't putting much thought at all into the fact that she was about to be married- all that she could focus on was the fact that everyone was bustling around for her and making her do things that she found ridiculous and Seth was getting more and more giddy by the day and, honestly, it was a bit overwhelming. All she wanted to do was get back to work but no one would let her.
During this time, all Booth could think about was how lucky she was that she was getting the wedding that he and Lorelai never had. Deep down, that thought tore him apart. He wanted to see that look of raw joy in her eyes as she tried on her wedding gown, and shoved cake in his face (as he was sure she would have done) during the tasting, and be just overall happy about the entire thing. He had to continue to remind himself that it was the marriage that counted, not the way it was done, but it was hard to help himself.
Exactly five nights prior to the wedding, Angela had tricked Brennan into going to a lingerie store for the "wedding night". Temperance found this just as absurd as everything else, if not more- why get something fancy if Seth was just going to rip it off of her anyways? It would only be of use for all of a minute, if that. And, as she continued to argue, it would not be the first time they made love, or anything close to it. But Angela insisted, continuing to throw various pieces into the dressing room stall.
"Angela, this is ridiculous," Brennan whined stubbornly, drawing back the curtain to step out to show her best friend the next piece. "It's just going to get in the way. Seth is going to have a hell of a time getting this off. You have no idea how long it took me to train him to remove my bra one handed. He's not ready for a step up to something like this. It will take away from the mood."
Angela clapped her hands together in delight, giggling as she stood straight up. "The point is for you to look hot, Sweetie. And trust me, you do."
A smirk. "I do look quite aesthetically pleasing, don't I?"
The artist sighed. "Word of advice, if you're worried about keeping things in the mood, don't say 'aesthetically pleasing' as a synonym for 'sexy'."
"Angela, Seth is already quite aware that I'm 'sexy'," Brennan countered, using the whip that Angela had forced into her hand to scratch an itch on her bare thigh, "Not only does he inform me of that fact every day, but he also displays his affection quite well."
"Yes, Bren. You've already described his overwhelming penis length to me quite thoroughly. I'm as eager as the next person to hear your borderline pornographic anecdotes- because apparently Seth gives a lot to tell, who would have known- but that is what I'll be asking to hear after the honeymoon. For now? I want you to purchase what's on your body, because I would really like to do you right now." Angela smirked as Brennan cracked a smile.
"That was highly inappropriate, Ange."
"That's exactly what I was aiming for. Now c'mon, Sweetie. Jack wants me to get home so we can have our own inappropriate fun."
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Despite ending the evening with Angela on a lighter note, Brennan found herself overwhelmed by everything. She needed a night away from everything. So she went to the one place she knew she could just have some conversation and some drinks and forget about everything, just for a few minutes- Booth, who she would have expected to be all over the wedding business, being the man who tried so hard to get her to believe in it all so many years previous, was the one person who kept his opinions to himself. If anything, he seemed disinterested, almost bothered by it all. She couldn't blame him. It truly was absurd- perhaps he knew that now that he was a married man himself, despite the fact that he seemed quite happy.
Hardly thinking that she might encounter his wife during this late night impromptu visit, Temperance knocked on the front door, hardly phased when she was greeted by a rough-looking Booth. "Can I come in?" she asked abruptly, before he could talk, "I need to drink."
"Bones," Booth greeted with a low chuckle, "What're you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be home with Seth?"
Brennan slipped past him, removing her shoes by the door. "I need to drink and not cuddle while I'm doing that. I trust that you won't try and hug me, whereas Seth will. I need a breather."
And so he obliged. They made small talk while Booth poured them both drinks, and they settled on either end of the couch, drinking and chatting. It was almost like the old times, which both of them appreciated. But they knew it couldn't last, so after about an hour, when both had a nice buzz, Booth decided to ask the deeper questions.
"What's going on with you, Bones?" he asked softly, looking up with a concerned look in his eyes. She had fallen back into step with being his best friend, and he wanted to make sure she was okay.
She merely shook her head. "This is all… Ridiculous, Booth. What am I doing? Marriage isn't for me, I don't believe in it. Why can't Seth and I remain as we always have been? What we have works for us. We live together and we're always around each other and we love each other. Despite the fact that 'love' is just the production of a chemical in the brain, it still exists between the two of us. Why do we have to make it official with the government? Why does it really matter?"
"Seth is a man of tradition, Bones, just like me," he reasoned, "It's important to him. You're right. Not a whole lot will change. But it will mean a lot to Seth, and you want that, right?"
"It's absurd to think that two people could be in love forever."
Booth immediately put down his drink and an awkward silence settled for quite some time. After what seemed like an hour (but in reality was only a minute), he spoke. "I want you to know right now, Bones, that you are a genius, but when it comes to love, you are wrong. You are so wrong. For as long as I walk this earth, I will love my wife." He held up his left hand, gesturing to the ring on his finger. "And I see the way Seth looks at you. He will never stop loving you. And I know you will never stop loving him." He was intent on making her see that she would be missing out if she did not follow through with the wedding. He reached forward and took one of her hands in his, persuading her to look him in the eye. "I want you to listen to me, Bones. You love Seth. I know you do. And he loves you. More than anything. Getting married is not a bad thing by any means. Marriage means that you will have someone to wake up to every morning. Marriage means that you'll always have one person in your life who you can go to for whatever you need. Marriage means that you'll have someone to love you and care for you for as long as you live. Marriage means not growing old alone. Marriage means having someone to worry about and care for. Do you know why marriages end, Bones? They end because two people, who love each other, cannot communicate. You and Seth can communicate and compromise. A marriage ends because someone is unfaithful. Both of you would never dream of breaking your monogamy. A marriage ends because harsh things are said, when you can't think of any other words. You and Seth have been together for eight years, now. You have everything worked out. You have a routine. You are in love, and that will never die. I know when two people are perfect for each other, and Bones, you and Seth will be together forever. I see the way he looks at you. How excited he is when he can hold you. How much he longs for just one little kiss. How he feels when you're smiling at him. How he would do everything in his power to make sure you're happy. Do you want to know what he told me yesterday, Bones? When we were fitting his tux? He told me that he feels like the luckiest man on earth. And that's precisely what he is, because he found you. Don't throw that away, Bones."
Temperance took a deep breath, blinking back tears. "I have to go," she swallowed, "Thank you, Booth."
And before he could say anything more, she was out the door.
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Dear Seth,
As you are well aware, I do not like to wake you when you are asleep, but this could not wait until morning.
I want to begin this letter by assuring you that I do, in fact, love you. I love you more than I have ever loved anybody else in this world, but that is why I have to do this. Love is not real. Love is not forever. I am surprised that ours has lasted as long as it has, though for that I am grateful. Unfortunately, I'm afraid that when our love does diminish, your leaving will have more impact on me than I am prepared to handle. When my parents left, I was young, though I have yet to recover in full. I am afraid that your leaving, which is inevitable, will ruin the person I have become.
I am afraid of how I will feel when, one day, you decide you do not want to wake up next to me any longer. I am afraid of what will happen when I will no longer have you to support me. Marriage is not something I can handle. Booth says that you will love me forever but I do not believe him. I don't believe that it is possible for us to remain in love, no matter how we are currently.
I want to thank you for spending so much time with me. For being the most amazing person I have ever encountered in my life and for being there through thick and thin. I love you. I truly do. But that is why I must say goodbye.
I hope you find somebody who can make you just as happy as you have made me.
Love, Temperance.
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An echo of a slamming door. Quick footsteps. A louder slamming door. A clearing of a throat and then, finally, a stern "Brennan".
The referred to female looked uneasily up from her laptop screen, slumping guiltily in the seat behind her office desk. Angela was undeniably intimidating when she was angry, and by the look on her face, she was certainly pissed. After writing the note breaking up with Seth, Temperance had taken refuge in her office, afraid to do anything other than work. She was afraid that she would break if she dared to do anything different, but it was only a matter of time before the others found out. She just wished she would have had an hour more. Just an hour.
"What were you thinking?" Angela wasn't about to let her get a word in edgewise. Not yet, at least. "For someone who is supposed to be a genius, you can be a real idiot sometimes, Bren. Why would you do that? And with a note, for God's sake. I thought you at least would have had the decency to do it to his face. But you shouldn't have even done it in the first place. I don't see why you're being such a coward, Brennan. You broke up with Seth because you were too in love with him and because you thought it wouldn't last. Is that what you really think? Do you think that me and Jack are just going to one day decide we don't love each other anymore? Do you think that Booth and Lorelai are going to get a divorce? What about Sweets and Daisy? You base all of your predictions off of proof, right? Well you have all the proof you need working right next to you every single day and you still can't accept it. You are a coward. Not everyone is going to leave you, Brennan. Seth is the last person you have to worry about doing that. But you know that, don't you? You're just using it as an excuse. You just have cold feet. You had absolutely no decent reason to do what you did."
"I… I was scared, Angela."
"Bull shit."
A silence fell between the two of them as Brennan fought back tears under Angela's piercing gaze. After a few moments, the silence was broken. "I dragged Seth down here. He's a wreck. He's in limbo. Go talk to him."
There was no use in disobeying.
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Slowly, the door to limbo crept open and Brennan stood in the doorway, observing her (ex) fiancé. What Angela said had been correct. Seth was leaning against the table, holding onto it for support as though his knees were about to buckle out from beneath him. His head was bowed but she could tell by the way his shoulders quivered that he was crying, no matter how silent it was. She fought to keep composure, clearing her throat to catch his attention. He just about jumped out of his skin, quickly wiping at his eyes and straightening up. The look on his face nearly broke her- he looked desperate to say something, anything, to get her to come back to him. But he couldn't think of anything to say, and she had no idea what to do.
Instead, she said, "I'm so sorry, Seth."
Well… That set him off.
"Do you have any idea how much I love you, Temperance?" he began, choking back a sob, "Any clue whatsoever? I gave you everything. You are my life. When I read your note, I felt like you dropped a fucking bomb on my head. And you had the audacity, the nerve to tell me that I was going to leave you? To fall out of love with you? God, Temperance! I thought you knew me better than that. When did you stop trusting me? And then… And then you told me that you knew that you were going to stop loving me? Do you know how much that hurt? God, how… What am I even supposed to do? I can't… I can't live without you, but I can't… I can't just go on knowing that you're having these thoughts, these doubts! Damnit!"
Brennan cleared her throat, looking down at the ground. "I'm sorry, Seth, but I just… Love is just…"
"Love is not just a chemical, Temperance!" He raised his voice, though it was cracking along with his sanity.
"But it is! It is and it… It can't last! It's never lasted, not with… Anything. Anyone. It can't last forever and you're a fool to say that it does!" That last bit slipped out, quickly followed by a few tears. "I… I'm sorry, Seth. I don't know what else I could have done."
"You could have talked to me," he sobbed quietly, "I would have set the record straight. I love you, Temperance."
"For now."
"Forever."
"There's no such thing as 'forever'."
Another eerie silence fell between them. Temperance had had enough of them. Luckily, Seth piped up again, though he was so quiet that it was almost inaudible. "So what now?"
She bit her lip, thinking. "We can… Continue, perhaps. And wait until… Wait until it happens."
"There's nothing I can do to change your mind, is there?" When she shook her head, he continued, "Temperance… You deserve somebody who can make you change your mind. Who can make you believe in love. If… If I can't do that, then maybe you're right. Maybe I'm not the right person for you." He sniffled, wiping some tears away before approaching her, pressing a soft kiss to her lips and then one to her forehead, letting the latter linger.
She heard an audible sob leave him once he was out of the room, and she allowed herself to cry, harshly, her own sobs filling the silence of limbo. After what seemed like ages, there was a knock on the door and Brennan turned around to find Booth standing in the doorway.
"Bones. You wanna go for a little trip?"
"Yes."
