Chapter 10

The Dark That Never Fades

Ochako was in the hospital for a solid two weeks before she was cleared to leave and even then she had to leave with a single crutch. It was another week after that before she was able to return to U.A. to continue her hero training. She had initially feared that her future as a hero might have been broken with her injuries but to her relief, her injuries healed much faster than usual thanks to the wonderful doctors and nurses at the hospital. She now entered the hero academia, her crutch gone along with the pain. She still walked with the slightest hint of a limp but she didn't mind considering she thought herself lucky for even being able to walk again.

She jogged down the hallways of the school towards class 1-A, her legs protesting slightly at the change of pace. She wanted to make them as strong as possible so that she wouldn't fall behind her classmates in the hero course so she ignored the slight aching and jogged until she reached the large classroom door marked with 1-A slashed down the front. She paused to catch her breath and then slid the door open. Aizawa was in the middle of lecturing his students on maneuvering in small spaces when attacking or defending against a villain when Ochako opened the door. He paused his lecture and all of the students looked in her direction.

The class seemed to explode as every student rose from their seats in unison. She squeaked in surprise as all of the girls of her class hugged her at once and all of the guys crowded around her with bright smiles on their faces. Even Bakugo rose from his chair despite staying on the outer rim of the circle of teens. Tsu had reached Ochako first and was holding her in a firm but careful hug that the other girls had copied around the pair. Now, the girls seperated and looked at Ochako with watery smiles and eyes filled with tears.

"You're back! Ribbit!" Tsu exclaimed with a relieved smile.

"Yeah I got out a while ago but they just told me that I was clear to come to class!" Ochako replied, finally recovering from the initial shock of being the center of attention.

"I'm so glad you're okay!" Kirishima and Iida said at the same time, the latter pushing through the group of girls to give his floaty friend a deep hug of his own.

Aizawa let this continue for some time before sternly ordering his students to get back to their seats and give Uraraka some space. Ochako followed everyone as they flowed back to their desks and settled into her seat with a sigh behind Iida. Aizawa glanced at her and she could have sworn the corners of his mouth twitched upwards a bit.

"Welcome back Uraraka, it's good to see you're feeling better." Ochako nodded to him and beamed at her teacher. He inclined his head ever so slightly to the left before turning back to the board to continue his instruction. Ochako focused everything she had on taking notes and creating lists so that she could catch up on everything she had missed. Izuku and Iida had made sure to bring her homework and notes to the hospital so that she wouldn't fall behind even though Aizawa had excused her from any due dates but she still didn't want to miss anything. Even so, she managed to sneak a few glances at Izuku who sat across the classroom from her. He had stayed with her at the hospital until he was forced to go back to school and even then he had returned every morning before school and every evening after school to sit with her and keep her company. He had come to see her with the rest of the class when she had walked in the door but he was a lot more distant than he was when they had kissed three weeks ago in the hospital. It was not directed at her, she knew it was because he still blamed himself for what had happened to her but he refused to listen even when she tried to tell him it wasn't true. She glanced over at him for the fifteenth time that hour and saw him glancing back at her for the first time. She smiled at him and his lips curled upwards at the corners but he glanced away from her quickly.

Ochako went back to her own notes but she was finding it harder to focus when she was worried about him. He was just so protective and she knew he just wanted the best for her but he was wrong if he thought she would be better off without him in her life. Even after all she had said to him he still believed that she was unsafe around him.

After what felt like an eternity, the bell rang signaling the end of the school day. Ochako knew that she would have to make up the material from her morning classes but she decided on doing that later when she saw Izuku rushing to pack up his stuff. Ochako had planned for this and was already packed by the time the bell rang so she was able to bound over to him before he could leave.

"Hey Deku!" Ochako said with a genuine smile at her friend. Izuku looked up in alarm and backed away a few feet.

"Hello Uraraka!" He said. His voice was genuinely cheerful, he was very happy to see her, but she could see the fear in his eyes that he might hurt her again.

Ochako inwardly cringed as he reverted to using her last name again. Normally this would not have been a problem considering he had called her that since the day he had met her, but recently he had been using her first name. She secretly liked it when he did.

"Want to walk with me to the dorms?" Ochako asked, shaking off the feeling of disappointment. Izuku hesitated but when he looked up into her eyes and saw a bright sparkle there, he nodded and continued to pack up his stuff.

"Great!" Ochako said, pumping her fist into the air. That was a mistake. She had been fully healed but her bullet wound still had a lingering grasp on her and her breath hitched with slight pain as her raised arm stretched the skin on her side. Izuku's head snapped up, fear in his eyes at the sound of her gasp.

"You know what Uraraka, I think I will head out alone, I've got some work I have to do and I have to get back to the dorms quickly." He didn't wait for her reply before he ran from the classroom, a few stray tears running down his cheeks. Ochako paused by his desk, her mouth still open to tell him to wait and her arm reached out to grab him.

"But I don't want you to go." She said with a sorrowful sigh as she lowered her hand and bent down to grab her stuff.

The time read 2:56 a.m. on her flip phone and she rubbed her eyes with exhaustion but Ochako could not sleep. She had worked on her homework until around 11:00 a.m. trying to catch up on the stuff she had missed before retiring for the night but no matter what she tried she could not coax sleep to knock her out. Everytime she closed her eyes she felt the bullet strike through her side like lightning and heard the insane voice of the villain laughing at her as he ripped at her broken legs. Tears leaked out of the corners of her eyes and although she tried to stifle them, they ran down her cheeks and landed with soft taps on her pillow with increasing frequency. Finally Ochako sat up with an annoyed huff, admitting to herself that she would probably suffer yet another of her frequent sleepless nights.

Sliding her legs over the side of the bed and hopping off and onto the floor, Ochako opened her dorm room door as silently as possible. It made the tiniest of squeaks but she managed to open it enough for her to slip through without making too much noise. She padded barefoot down the hallway and into the common space, walking on her tiptoes to avoid waking any of her friends. Her head swam with lightheadedness and she cringed at every shadow in the dark common space but she forced herself to the kitchenette that was attached to the main living area. She opened one of the cabinets and pulled out a large water cup, she hoped some water would help clear her head and cool her nerves. She leaned over to the faucet and poured herself a full glass of water, savoring the coolness against her finger pads. Her memory flashed back to the stifling heat of the underground lair and she gulped down the water in a desperate need to flush the memories from her system. She had drained the glass in only a few gulps and almost lunged to the sink for more.

It was after her third full glass of water that she felt it. She dropped her glass and heard it shatter on the ground but she didn't care as she bolted for the bathroom that was also attached to the common space. She barely made it to a toilet, not caring to shut or lock the door as she flung the lid open and vomited into the bowl. The white hot memories of pain and heat and suffering came flooding through her mind with every heave. Her stomach twisted painfully and she threw up again, the villain's wicked laughter echoing in her ears. Her face felt hot, too hot, her body felt like it was on fire and she felt like throwing herself into an ice bath. She tried to sit up but vomited again, her dinner coming up all at once. Her breathing became more and more shallow and although she tried to remember some calming breathing exercises, the memory of her legs being stretched and snapped over and over again made her breathe so fast that she was gasping for air, searching for something to cool down her body and her mind.

Rough, cool hands suddenly gripped her hair ever so lightly. She winced at the touch and almost cried out, whipping around to face the possible attacker. The sound of her cry died on her tongue as the green hair and dark freckles of her best friend came into view. She shuddered and let out a huge sigh of relief at her friend.

"Deku, you scared me, what are you doing up?"

He didn't answer, instead he just brushed more of her hair back from her face and pulled it into his loose fist so that it was out of her face. His fingers brushed her cheeks with feather-like softness.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, his eyes glimmering with worry and sorrow, their green color misted over with grief.

Another wave of nausea crashed over Ochako and she threw her head back over the toilet as she vomited again.

And again.

Suddenly she felt Izuku place his hand on her back and start to rub comforting circles between her shoulder blades. Ochako spat into the bowl, the sour taste of the vomit coating her tongue. Izuku did not speak, he just comforted her and held her hair back as she relived the horrors of her capture and torture with the villain. Finally, she dry-heaved one last time and felt her stomach relax, all of its contents spilled into the toilet in front of her. She reached a shaking hand up to the handle and flushed it down, her breathing finally calming as the water cleared. Once the vomiting ended, Ochako felt all of the strength leave her body. She had been on her knees when she had been throwing her guts up but her arms and legs now refused to hold her up. Her body started to shake violently and she felt herself slide from the edge of the toilet bowl towards the ground. But she landed in rough, strong arms.

Izuku caught Ochako with one arm wrapped around her shoulders and used his other arm to curl it under her knees. Careful not to jostle her too much, Izuku stood up from his kneeling position on the bathroom tile floor and carried Ochako back into the common space. Her whole body was still shaking and she clutched his shirt with one hand and clung to him using her other arm around his neck.

"I'm sorry Deku." Ochako choked out between her horrible shaking.

Izuku shook his head and gave her a watery smile.

"Don't be sorry, this is not your fault." He said in a low whisper, rough with an emotion Ochako had never heard before.

She shivered again, although this time it had nothing to do with her dreams or vomiting.

"It's not yours either." Ochako managed.

Izuku looked down at her and gave her a slight squeeze as he carried her. As he reached one of the couches that stood in the center of the room, he shifted Ochako in his grasp and gently laid her down on the soft cushions.

"I'll be right back Uraraka, okay?" He said in an even softer whisper. She nodded and shifted herself so that she was more comfortable on the couch. He left and returned a moment later with a pillow and a blanket from his own room which was directly across from the common space.

"Here you go." He said softly as he laid the blanket over her. He then kneeled down and used one hand against her upper back to raise her from the couch slightly and used the other to place his pillow under her head. Once she was settled, he walked to the end of her feet and sat down on the couch beside her, one hand resting on the armrest of the couch and his head leaning back into the couch pillows.

"Hey, Deku?" Ochako asked.

"Hm?"

"Why are you awake right now? Did I wake you?"

He paused.

"No you did not wake me Uraraka, I couldn't sleep. Actually, I haven't been able to sleep in a couple of nights." He replied, his head turned to look out the window.

"I haven't been able to sleep properly since you were admitted to the hospital." He rubbed his eyes and yawned widely before looking directly at her.

"I have been tossed awake by dreams of you getting hurt, or dreams of me not being able to bring you back. Dreams of being in this world without you." Izuku said, his green eyes filled with something that Ochako could not read.

Ochako blushed and turned away from him.

"Thank you." She said quietly, her voice hoarse and her body still shaking.

He did not answer, he just went back to looking out the large windows displaying the views of the dorm courtyard and training areas.

They sat in silence for several minutes, Ochako's shaking never ceasing even after finishing her bathroom adventure. Izuku wanted to sleep and he wanted to comfort his friend but felt as if he couldn't do either. He rested his chin on his propped up fist and watched the stars glitter in the sky like baby diamonds.

"How long has the vomiting been occuring?" Izuku asked after a few moments, still facing away from her.

"Ever since I was admitted to the hospital." She echoed his words from earlier. Izuku turned to look at her, worry lighting his green eyes.

"How have you been able to preserve any energy during the day?" He asked.

"Lots of coffee and some prescribed medication." Ochako replied. "I've been unable to keep any food down lately so I've had to have supplements that dissolve more quickly… more quickly than food so as to keep up… keep up my stamina..."

Ochako's breathing slowed and when Izuku turned to glance at her, he found her dozing, one arm clutching his pillow and the other held close to her chest. She was still shaking hard enough to make the couch tremble, but it must be a good sign that she is starting to sleep, right? Izuku stood up ever so slowly and padded silently past Ochako towards his room to try to get some sleep of his own. He was almost to his door when he heard her stir on the couch and heard the softest sound of "Deku." whisper across the room. He turned around and walked back to Ochako to see her shaking more violently than before, her eyes wide and filled with fear.

"I know you're tired Deku but could you… c-could you s-stay with m-me tonight?"

Izuku's heart clenched tightly at her fearful face and the plead in her voice. Still he hesitated and swallowed loudly in the dark room before nodding slightly. He went to go sit at the edge of the couch, as if to guard her for the night, but Ochako stopped him.

"I mean… could you c-come over here? With... me?"

Izuku gulped audibly this time and Ochako blushed.

"I don't mean anything like that," she whispered. "But I just want to feel grounded, to feel like I am here and with someone I care about." She said, her blush growing. Izuku still felt nervous and his heart was a fluttering mess but he nodded again.

Using her elbows, Ochako managed to sit up (with a little help from Izuku) to make room for him. Izuku laid down on the couch, placing the pillow against the arm rest so that it would not poke him in the back of the head all night. Then, once he was settled into a comfortable position, he allowed Ochako to rest her head against his chest, her back pressed against his legs so that they were pinned between her and the back of the couch. Ochako sighed a little and her shaking subsided slightly, her hands curled into light fists against her own chest. Izuku breathed in deeply and tried to calm his wild thoughts as well as his crazy heart as Ochako leaned against him.

Suddenly, a car passed by on the road outside, its headlights flashing through the large windows on either side of the front door, and a dull roaring filling the front of the common space as it passed. Although this was a regular occurance for the students at UA considering there was a popular street right outside of the dorms, Ochako flinched so hard that she groaned as a light pain pulsed through her side. She squirmed to get away from the sound and light of the passing car even though it had already gone past the school and ended up with her back pressed against Izuku's chest and her head nestled into his neck. Izuku froze in surprise at this sudden change but eventually got his composure back. He reached an arm around and curled it over her waist protectively, his own face snuggling into her shoulder. Using his free arm, Izuku pulled his blanket over the top of them. Several awkward minutes passed, but after a time that seemed to take both an eternity and a second, Ochako's breathing slowed to a deep rhythm and her body relaxed against Izuku. She was finally asleep.

Izuku felt his brain start to fog up and he sighed contentedly as sleep finally began to overtake his senses. Just before he fell into his must-needed slumber, though, Izuku realized that Ochako had stopped shaking entirely.

Izuku was barely awake when the bright sun peered through the windows in the early morning. His green eyes fluttered open and the first thing he saw was a mass of brown hair and a beautiful face buried in his neck and chest. His heart shot up into his throat at the sight and the memories from the previous night caused a light pink hue to rush to his cheeks. She looked so peaceful resting against him, so different from how he had found her last night, leaning against the toilet and unable to stand as she threw up everything she had inside of her. He realized that she had shifted her position, last night she had been facing away from him with her back arched against his chest but this morning she had flipped so that her face was buried in his neck and her hands had wandered so that one was looped around his neck while the other was pressed against his sternum. He had shifted too he realized, looking down to see one of his hands curled around her back while the other cupped the back of her head, holding her closer to him.

Suddenly a loud squeal jolted the pair awake, causing them to leap away from one another. Ochako ended up on the floor and Izuku leaped over the back head of the couch so that he landed with a crash on the edge of the kitchenette.

"Mina!?" Ochako asked in horrified shock. "What- What- What are you doing here!?" Ochako babbled, her heart still racing with surprise.

"What am I doing here?" Mina asked incredulously. "This is our dorm, what are you doing out here on the couch with Midoriya?"

"Nothing! It's not like that, I got sick last night and-" Mina started to laugh as Ochako covered her face and activated her quirk on herself, floating high above the room and bouncing off of the tall ceiling.

Izuku stood up from the couch, his face such deep red that he looked like an over ripe tomato, and held out his arms.

"Ochako release your quirk, I'll catch you."

Ochako peered at both Mina and Izuku from between her fingers before bringing her shaking hands together to release her quirk. She normally would do a somersault and activate her quirk on herself for half a second when falling from a great height in order to avoid hurting herself but she was not high enough in the air for her to use that tactic so she complied. She landed in Izuku's arms with a soft grunt from both of them and although she was grateful, she sprang from his grasp as if he had burned her, both of their faces bright red under Mina's wide eyed stare.

Ochako mumbled her thanks and the pair tried to part ways and head to their respective bedrooms when Mina lunged for Ochako. Ochako gasped and instinctively leaped out of the way, but the pink alien girl caught her off guard. Izuku turned to go to Ochako but his floaty friend waved him off with a smile.

"I'll see you at lunch!" Ochako said cheerfully before turning to follow Mina into her bedroom on one of the upper floors.

Izuku watched them go for a minute before turning to walk to his own bedroom. He pushed open the door and gasped as a hand fisted itself into his shirt and yanked him into his room, slamming the door behind him.