AN: Merry Christmas you guys, here's your gift from me to you! Of course my life is not as exciting as it should be for a 20-year-old college student, but oh well-it means more updates for you, right? haha well heres a Christmas special for y'all!
Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight and all characters involved, I only changed the storyline.
Unbeta'd and straight from the Microsoft Word. Mistakes by me.
Paper bags and plastic hearts
All are belongings in shopping carts
It's goodbye
But we got one more night
Let's get drunk and ride around
And make peace with an empty town
We can make it right
Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway
Watch it burn
Let it die
Cause we are finally free tonight
Tonight will change our lives
It's so good to be by your side
We'll cry
We won't give up the fight
We'll scream loud at the top of our lungs
And they'll think it's just cause we're young
And we'll feel so alive
Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway
Watch it burn
Let it die
Cause we are finally free tonight
All of the wasted time
The hours that were left behind
The answers that we'll never find
They don't mean a thing tonight
Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway
Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway
Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway
Watch it burn
Let it die
Cause we are finally free tonight!
The Great Escape - Boys Like Girls
BPOV
December 25th, 2006
Christmas in the Cullen' home is much different from it ever has been at my house with Mom and Dad. They were never cheap and I was always an only child, no cousins or anything, so I always got a lot of gifts-most of what I wanted as well. This year I didn't even tell Esme or Carlisle what I wanted and I still got a bunch of gifts that I love.
I was particularly surprised when Esme and Carlisle got all of us fifth generation thirty-gigabyte iPods. Mine is pink-of course, duh-Alice's is yellow and Edward got a black one. I thought it was funny when he opened it; he caught my eyes because I was watching him. He probably thought I smiled at him because it's him but I really smiled because he got a black iPod, like his soul.
Alice and I also got matching cashmere scarves to go along with Esme's that she got as well. And because we're still kids, we all got Razor kick scooters-same colors as our iPods. They know us so well. Except Edward, instead of a scooter, he got the newest edition of an Xbox 360 Pro Console with twenty gigabytes. From the corner of my eye he seemed thrilled.
Opening gifts with everyone at six in the morning on Christmas made me wish my parents' were here. Even with everything going on, I still tend to miss them in my wake. They're always in the back of my head rolling around. Sometimes I think they're my conscience when I make decisions. I can always hear Mom telling me to be careful when I run down the stairs or Dad warning me about boys. It makes me laugh. And sometimes I do, that's usually when Edward stares at me.
It's been a few months since I've even really talked to him, and I really don't care to either. Obviously we don't attend the same schools but I'm not stupid or oblivious when Esme, Alice and I pick him up from school. I see the girls hanging all over him, I see the looks in their eyes and I definitely see the look in his. He's always smirking down at them, resting his arms around their shoulders and pulling them in closer. Until Esme honks the horn he's completely different, then he removes himself from the clique, clears his throat and barely nods a goodbye to his posse. I still have yet to understand what his deal is.
Then when we're home, he's a real snot head. He's always cooped up in his room or down in the den watching sports when Carlisle's home. Alice says he works on his homework and studies in his room a lot. I'll believe that when I see it.
As if sensing my thoughts about him, I see Edward's eyes scanning my face as I'm watching Alice open her next gift. It's a gift card to Macy's; I picked it out with Esme last weekend. I try my best to ignore his eyes watching me, but something in me gives in and I risk a glance over at him. I don't look at him much these days so whenever he's not looking my way or when he's busy looking at something else I catch a glimpse and he's not what I remember from barely five months ago. And when I do get a glimpse, I savor it until next time.
I look to my right and nearly gasp aloud when I catch Edward's eyes glimmering at me. He's sitting criss-cross on the floor like Alice and I are, his shoulders slumped forward and his head turned in my direction and lazy smirk on his face. Stupid beautiful face! His emeralds shine brighter once my eyes connect with his. He probably thinks I'm going to let him in, but he's wrong. So wrong. Then he's handing me a card and without thinking properly, I take it. My hand is reaching out toward him and I'm removing the card from his hand. Tingles shoot up through my fingers as our hands brush lightly. It's been so long since we've touched.
Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to talk to him, ya know? Shut it, just… shut it.
I take the card and look down quickly, my cheeks filling with blood turning them a bright pink. I'm observing the card and see my name scrawled in Edward's script. Isabella. I set it aside for when I'm alone and look up to see six pairs of eyes watching me; I blush again and look to Alice. She's smiling at me, holding out her gift card and waving it around. We go around a few more times before all of our gifts are open and we're all smiling and laughing about our toys. Even Carlisle is excited about his new tie-it's white with stethoscopes all over it. Esme, Alice and I also got him a shirt that has a surgeon on it holding a saw behind his back and asking next. We cracked up in the store when we saw it.
I collect my things and take them up to my room. I set my new gifts on my bed and close my door, hoping for some privacy to read my card from Edward. My finger traces over my name from Edward's rough pen tip, his handwriting it so lovely I'm jealous. My chicken scratch isn't something to really look at more than six times to understand what the hell I even wrote in the first place-doesn't help when I can't even read my handwriting.
Peeling the envelope open, I slide my finger beneath it and open the paper. I grab the card from the envelope and stare at the snowmen on the cover. Two children-a boy and a girl-are in the process of building one together, the little boy has eyes for the girls and his smile is miles high. It makes me smile. When I open the card I'm not expecting a paper to fall out so I'm surprised when one does and falls to my floor. Glancing back at the card, to make sure I'm not missing anything else, I see the printed script of the card saying "Merry Christmas," so I forgo the card and retrieve my letter and sit on my bed. It's folded so nicely, creased at every edge so tightly as I'm opening it slowly. Before it's fully opened, I take a deep breath and pull.
Isabella,
I am so very sorry for how things have turned out. I never meant to hurt you; you must believe me on that. Just trust me when I say that everything in my life is difficult right now and I don't know what to do or say to make you believe me in that. Things are so…hard. It's even more difficult to be across the hall from you and not be allowed to talk to you or look in your direction without you stiffening up and scurrying from the room.
I honestly never meant to hurt you, Bella. I meant every word I told you, I have honestly loved you since your eyes met mine nearly fourteen years ago. You're so amazing and beautiful it's hard for me to have to write you a letter when telling you would possibly make you believe me even more that I am honestly sorry. High school will change you-which I know you will see truly before anything else. The only other thing I can tell you is that I'm sorry for hurting your feelings-I never meant for that to happen. I can only blame myself for falling in with the wrong crowd and hurting someone I truly care about.
I'm so unbelievably sorry, sweetheart.
Edward.
My mind was blank and unreadable. What had he meant by "falling in with the wrong crowd", what does that even mean? This boy is so confusing and I hate it. I don't know if I'm supposed to cry, scream or hit something as a response to his letter. Am I supposed to write one back?
Wetness hit the paper I held in my hands, I reached up and felt my cheeks to find they're wet with tears. So it's a cry then? His words were beyond sweet, but a question I held in the back of mind was still reeling.
Do I believe him?
-YGAPOM-
I stayed home with Alice for New Year's along with Esme and Carlisle. Around eight was when Edward graced us with his presence for the first time in a week-he'd been either in his room or out with his "friends from school." A.k.a, he's been pretty shady.
"Where are you going, Edward?" Carlisle asked from the sofa closest to the foyer. Alice and I are on the sofa opposite from the stairs with the best view to the television, only noticing Edward was here from Carlisle asking him as he stepped from the stairs to the hardwood floors. Hearing his feet hit the floor made me want to bet that he was probably wearing his most prized supras.
"Out," was Edward's answer, heading for the door and only pausing when Esme spoke up.
"You're not going to watch the ball drop with us later, dear?" Esme asked, sitting forward from her seat beside Carlisle.
"Nah, I'm gonna be with friends," he said turning the doorknob. "I'll either stay at Em's or come back late tonight."
Esme sighed, sitting back and curling under Carlisle's arm as it rested on the back of the couch. "Alright, dear, just… be careful, alright?"
"Always am." And he was gone with the thud of the door and the television the only other sound in the room.
For the next few hours Esme and Carlisle sipped on some wine while Alice and I talked animatedly about school and eating our Christmas candy from out stockings. We watched the annual Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve special on the T.V., waiting for the ball to drop. Alice and I, in control of the remote, flipped back and forth through movies and the special during commercials.
A couple of glasses and a movie later, it was fifteen minutes to midnight and we're all crowded in the kitchen-minus Edward. Esme bought sparkling grape juice for Alice and I to drink while they drank the good stuff, she filled us a glass as we talked about the upcoming year. Ally promised that the summer of 2007 would be the best summer of my life, I told her I'm holding that to her.
We all stared at the small counter T.V in the kitchen as everyone started counting down.
"Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven! Six! Five! Four! Three! Two! ONE!" We shouted along with the T.V.
Carlisle and Esme shared a passionate kiss that was meant for only them when the ball dropped; Alice and I averted our eyes and found each other. We giggled and hugged each other and turned toward our drinks. We laughed once they stopped kissing and joined us.
We all clinked glasses together and shouted, "To the year Two-Thousand-and-Seven!"
-YGAPOM-
A few hours later Esme and Carlisle turned into bed, leaving Alice and I alone for a while. It was just after three in the morning when Alice started yawning. We were in the middle of watching A Christmas Story and had just gotten to the part when Randy's crying beneath the kitchen sink because Ralphie got into a fight at school.
She mumbled something about going to bed and went up the stairs. I finished the movie before deciding that I better turn in as well. I was placing the disk case back on the rack with the others when there was a bang at the front door. Nearly scaring my shitless, I covered my heart to try to stop it from racing as hard as I walked to the door and flipped the porch light on.
I peered through the glass windows and spotted caramel colors waves near the porch steps. I unlocked the door and opened it slowly, shivering at the cold air that seeped into the warmth of the house.
"Edward?" I called out to him. "Edward, what are you doing?" I opened the door further and stepped out onto the porch behind him. He was slumped over against one of the pillars at the steps, his head resting on it and his body near falling forward.
I reached him and reached for him when he got up quickly and turned around, spotting me with wide eyes and a really shit-eating grin. His eyes were glazed over and he was wobbling toward me. "Ey, Bella," he slurred. "Belly belly, Bells." He giggled and hiccupped.
"Edward, are you… drunk?" I was completely stunned, I had never seen him drunk or even act this way ever the entire time I had been living with the Cullen's. He nodded at me, smirking again. My lips twitched, itching to smile along with him in his silliness. "Come on," I said, waving him forward. "Come inside before we die of pneumonia."
I pull Edward inside and keep shushing him as we walk up the stairs. More like, I walk up the stairs while he hangs all over me. I grunt while I pull him along. Man this boy's heavy-and hot as well. Does he have a fever? Sheesh!
I'm still telling Edward to be quiet when we finally make it to his room. I basically shove him through the door and onto his bed once we're inside and close the door behind me.
"Finally give in, belly Bells?" he asks me, smirking that stupid grin like he was downstairs. "Huh, baby, you finally want a piece of Edcalibur?" He giggles again and reaches for me to join him while he lies down. "Come on, sweet Bella." I step forward because my feet don't work with my brain very well. He smiles and encourages me again. Before I know it, I'm beneath him and we're kissing.
He tastes of sweetness and liquor. His mouth is hot and his tongue is the moving around frantically inside my mouth and I'm moaning. His hands are around my face, cupping my jaw and wrapping around my neck-pulling me closer. I'm thankful for this because I cannot get enough of him either. My hands are clawing at his shirt, reaching for the hem and pulling it up. Just briefly he stops attacking my mouth and sits up to remove his shirt, I stare at him as he pulls it over his head and tosses it across the room. My eyes travel down from his face to his neck, to his collarbone, his chest and stomach. How many is that? Eight, I think I counted eight.
His scent is all around me. His pillows, his kisses, everything is making my head fog up and not think clearly. And when he kisses me, I'm gone for sure this time.
We kiss for what seems ever and when we're not close enough, clothes are removed. I'm wearing a bra and my jeans from today-technically yesterday-while he's in his boxers and only that. His hips are positioned in between my legs and the hardness I've longed for over the months is there. Edward rolls his hips as we kiss, moaning more each time he hits my pelvis. I don't know what he's doing, but the sounds he's eliciting are delicious.
It's when he reaches for the button to my pants that my head finally clears up and I'm aware of what's happening. He's still attacking my mouth with his, but his left hand left my waist and has made it to my buttons. When one pops, so do I. My hands find Edward's bare chest and as delicious looking as he is, I push him away fiercely.
"No," I say. "We can't do this, Edward." My hands are still on his chest when his hands grab my wrists and his eyes meet mine. My browns are fear-widened as he looks at me with his greens. When I whimper from his strong hands around my wrists, it finally dawns on him what's happening.
He releases his death-grip and rolls off of me. "I'm sorry, Bella, I'm so sorry." He lets me sit up and put my shirt on while he stays in his boxers. As I'm about to get up and go to my room, he pulls me back. "Lay with me, please?"
And because his eyes are so sad and fearful like I'm about to walk out of his life, I do. I get back into bed with him and cuddled at his side. He flips the side lamp and wraps an arm around, smiling as I snuggle in closer.
It's not long before he's asleep. He's mumbling something about me as he drifts off and I'm near unconsciousness when he says, "I love you, Bella."
AN: Happy Holidays! Has Bella forgiven Edward? They seem to be getting pretty cozy, right? Do you think she will forgive him? And would you like an EdwardPOV to see inside his head? LET ME KNOW IN A REVIEW! READ AND REVIEW PLEASE!