Prompt: Claustrophobia

Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Age.

When Anders had first learned that his punishment for his most recent escape was a year in solitary confinement, he had felt that it was completely worth it. After all, he had managed to steal back a month of his life from the templars and while a year in solitary meant that he wouldn't be able to escape again until it was over, being confined alone couldn't be much worse than regular life at the Tower.

That feeling had lasted for all of a week.

The room had seemed a bit small at first but not really a big deal. 'At first' being the operative word. Eventually, he had found Mr. Wiggums the cat who occasionally visited and helped keep him sane. Mr. Wiggums couldn't be there all the time, however, and there were still far too many hours spent staring blankly at the walls. Those all too stifling and suffocating walls. There were times when he almost thought that the walls were closing in on him which was worrying for two reasons. One, that wasn't a particularly sane thing to think, he was pretty sure. And two, this being a prison for mages meant that for all he knew it really was.

The end of the year in solitary couldn't have come soon enough. Anders was rather embarrassed by the state he'd been in when Greagoir had finally let him out. Some of the templars hadn't been able to contain their smirks at the sight of him. See how they'd look at the end of an entire sodding year in a cramped room with no one to talk to but a cat and no way to figure out how much time had passed save the meals that had been slid into his cell.

So it was a bad experience – a horrible experience – but at least it was over and he could move on with his life and lay low until the time came for his next escape attempt. Or so he thought. He hadn't expected the nightmares about being trapped back in that tiny room (permanently this time) but since those only occurred at night, he thought that he would be fine.

He would have sincerely appreciated it if he could have realized that was wrong before he'd slipped into a closet with not one but TWO beautiful redheads. Unfortunately, despite how very…excited he had been going into the closet, once he was actually inside his excitement had immediately turned into mindless terror. His heart had started racing uncontrollably and he felt lightheaded. It was like he couldn't breathe and instead of a small closet with his two delightful female companions, he was suddenly back in that room, that terribly empty room.

The girls had not been impressed with his performance – or lack there of – to say the least but, despite the fact that they complained to all their friends and his reputation took a hit, Anders really did have bigger problems. He was out of that room, yes, and intellectually he knew that it was over but it was becoming more and more clear to him that the room wasn't done with him yet, not by a long shot. It seemed that every time he was in an enclosed space he began to panic. Did he mention that the entire Tower was one big enclosed space? Fortunately, it was easier to control when he was in a larger enclosed space than a smaller one. Still, this irrational fear of his was the driving force behind Anders' sixth escape.

When he was caught, Anders found – to his great surprise – that Greagoir had decided not to put him back in solitary. Anders had been terrified that another escape would mean another year, at least, back in that room but he couldn't not escape. It just wasn't who he was. Fortunately, Greagoir seemed to have decided that either the room was too cruel even for a mage or else not as effective as it should have been and so he was spared from having to go through an ordeal like that again. Greagoir's decision was a makersend as Anders honestly didn't know if his sanity could have withstood that again and certainly not so soon after the last time.

It was becoming increasingly clear to Anders that he had a problem and so he did the only sensible thing he could and went to the library to do some research. It would have been easier and taken far less time had he simply asked someone about his symptoms but everyone knew about what he had been through and so if he did ask then whoever he asked would instantly make the connection that he wasn't just asking out of idle curiosity. Once one person knew, who knew how many would find out? That might not have been a big deal to some people but Anders hated the thought of his fellow mages who were content to just waste away in this prison or the bucket-headed bastards that guarded them seeing him vulnerable.

Eventually, he found what he was looking for. Claustrophobia. The fear of having no escape and being closed in. It was almost a relief to find this information, to realize that he wasn't alone in this. He soon absorbed everything the library had to offer about the subject because he figured that the more he knew, the better prepared he was to deal with it.

One day, he'd be free of the Tower for good and never have to worry about being trapped. Until then, there was no reason to let anybody in on this little weakness of his.

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