Rachel00 - well there is a little bit of Pacey in this chapter so I hope
you enjoy it and thanks for the review.
Lou- thanks for your very kind words. I'm glad you are enjoying the story so much and hope you keep enjoying it.
Helon- great ideas. Maybe you should write your own stories. I'm not really looking to make this a romance story per say between any of them but if it happens it happens - parts of this story seem to be writing itself. Hope you keep reading.
C-chan96- Thank you so much for your two wonderful reviews. You had me laughing through both of them. My first serenade. I'm so happy. Linkin Park ain't exactly a group I listen too but I still enjoyed the serenade very much. Please keep reviewing. I love reading your reviews and feel honored that you actually reviewed twice even though the second was more of a rant on your part but it's the thought that counts right. Thanks!
The drive out to the house seemed to take forever but eventually Doug reached the spot and pulled his car along the side of the road behind one of the other squad cars already there. Part of him couldn't believe that he had been there the night before. Those events seemed to have taken place so long ago.
Doug got out of the car and started across the lawn toward the house. The property was swarming with police officers and news reporters. Doug could see the glances that his co-workers shot his way. None of them were sure what to say to him or if they should even say anything. The state detectives who had been brought in on the investigation continued to go about what they were doing not giving Doug's presence a second thought. As far as they knew he was just another Capeside police officer. As for the reporters, it took them a little while to recognize who Doug was and once they did he was already half way across the front yard.
Once they recognized Doug Witter, the reporters moved to intercept them. They didn't get very far, though as they were stopped by the cops assigned to keep an eye on them and make sure they didn't get in the way of the investigation that was taking place.
Doug made his way to the house and walked up the front steps. Acting Sheriff Mitch Barnes, who was standing on the front porch talking to the detective in charge of the investigation, had noticed Doug's approach and as he came onto the porch excused himself from his conversation and walked over to Doug.
"Doug, I'm not sure this is the best idea?" Mitch whispered to him. "Why don't you just go home."
"I can't, sir" Doug told him evenly. Mitch Barnes could see the determination in the young officer's eyes. He could tell that it would be impossible to convince Doug to leave.
"Okay," Barnes said giving in. "We could actually use your help," he admitted as he walked with Doug toward the front door. "If you could tell us if you notice anything that is actually missing at least we'll have something to go on."
"What's that suppose to mean?" Doug asked his boss, looking over at him. The detective that had been talking to Barnes had fallen into step behind them and was the one to answer Doug's question.
"So far there is no indication that the story of a robbery is true. There is no signs of a force entry, and other than the allegedly missing items nothing seems to have been disturbed. Considering the source of the robbery story I think it was a made up story to cover up what really happened."
Mitch Barnes shot a warning look back at the detective. It didn't take long for the detective to figure out what that look meant. He had forgotten that the other officer was John Witter's son.
"Sorry," the detective muttered. Doug didn't say anything. He sure couldn't blame the guy for saying the same thing that he had been thinking ever since he had heard about what happened to his mother.
Doug almost couldn't believe that this was the house that he had grown up in. Not only was there crime scene tape up, there were detectives that were complete strangers to him swarming all over the place. It seemed unreal to him.
"Do you notice anything missing?" Mitch Barnes asked him. The question snapped Doug out of his thoughts and back to reality.
Doug looked around the familiar entry hall. He didn't see anything out of the ordinary. Without saying a word he walked into the living room still looking around. He so wanted to find something out of the ordinary. Something that indicated that his Dad might possibly be telling the truth. His eyes fell on the shelf along the one side of the room. There were several empty spots on the shelves and Doug searched his memory trying to remember what should have been in those spots.
"Two antique vases and a couple of my Dad's old books are missing from over there," Doug said pointing to the shelf. He saw the detective flip back through his notebook looking for something.
"That's what Mr. Witter told us had been taken from the house," the detective said.
"But just steal four things and leave everything else undisturbed. In my experience thieves aren't usually that particular," Mitch Barnes commented. Doug and the detective had both been thinking the same exact thing.
Some other detectives came up and started talking to the one who had been with Mitch and Doug.
"Is it okay if I look around the house?" Doug asked Barnes.
"Yeah, go ahead. Just keep in mind that this is a crime scene," Barnes told him. Doug nodded as he walked out of the living room. He walked slowly through the rooms on the first floor. Nothing else showed any signs of a robbery. Everything was just like he remembered it when he had been there the evening before.
Doug headed back toward the front entry way and the stairs. Although he tried not to look down he found his eyes drifted that way anyway. Drifted toward the white chalk outline that was on the wooden floor. Doug kept walking past it. He didn't need to stop and dwell on what that chalk outline meant. He didn't want to remember.
Doug slowly walked upstairs and started looking into the rooms up stairs. He was still hoping to find something else missing. Something torn apart but he found nothing. He was just walking out of his parents bedroom when something caught his eye. It was a small box sticking ever so slightly out from under the bed.
Doug instinctively put gloves on before kneeling down and pulling the box out, his boss' words still echoing in his mind. As much as he didn't want it to be this was a crime scene. His childhood home was a crime scene.
He reached out and pulled the box slowly out from under the bed. When he saw what was in the box he could feel anger rising up in him. He couldn't believe his Dad would go that low. Doug quickly stood up and grabbed a nearby lamp. With a yell he hurled the lamp toward the far wall where it shattered against the wall.
Pacey looked around the room at his friends who were all gathered. Dawson was sitting at the far end of the couch that Pacey was laying on. Joey was sitting on the floor next to him her back against the couch. Jen and Andie were sitting in the two easy chairs in the room and Jack had brought in one of the kitchen chairs and was sitting next to his sister. He had offered to bring Joey a chair but Joey said she was fine where she was.
No one had said much since everyone had gathered. He had confirmed that what his friends had heard on the television and from the town people was true and then they had grown silent. The silence was getting to Pacey but he was afraid to say anything. He was afraid he would say something to drive them away and he wanted them here. Even if nothing was said, he liked having them in the room. At least he didn't feel so alone.
"I'm sorry Pacey," Dawson finally said breaking the silence. Everyone look toward him and suddenly Dawson felt uncomfortable but he kept going saying what he had wanted to say all morning. "I'm supposedly your best friend and I haven't exactly been there for you. Hell, I didn't even start thinking something might be wrong at your house until a couple of days ago."
"You weren't the only one," Joey said softly from the floor beside him. Jen, Jack, and Andie all exchanged glances. They could only imagine how Dawson and Joey felt. They hadn't known Pacey as long as the other two had. They hadn't grown up with him and none of them, except for Andie, had been exactly close to him. They could use that to help them justify their not noticing anything out of the ordinary. Dawson and Joey couldn't. They had grown up with Pacey.
"Guys, its not your fault," Pacey told them. "Its not any of your fault," he added looking at the other three in the room, his glance lingering on Andie who had looked miserable from the moment she had showed up with Jack. "I'm the one who tried to hide what was going on. I didn't want anyone to know. Everyone else in the family kept quiet about if and I guess I didn't want any other reason for them to think I was the screw-up of the family. And look even when you guys started asking questions all I did was pushed you guys away."
"And we let you," Andie said softly. "We shouldn't have let you pushed us away like that. A real friend would have been there. Would've kept trying no matter what," she continued her thoughts thinking about what Pacey had done for her not long ago. She had tried several times to push him away but he hadn't given up on her like she had on him.
"The truth is I didn't want you guys involved in any of this. I didn't want any of you getting hurt."
"Is that why you always spent time at my house instead of us going to your house?" Dawson asked him.
"Yeah, that and the fact that I wanted to spend as much time away from my house as possible. I felt safe at your house Dawson, even if it was only for a short time."
There was silence in the room again. This time it was Jen who spoke up.
"Pacey this might be out of line, but I need to say it anyway," Jen said looking at the floor not at her friend. "I overheard more than what I originally told you guys I did. People are saying that there never was a robbery, that your father killed your mother. I didn't want to say anything but I don't know, its been bothering me and I needed to tell someone and I wouldn't feel right talking about something like that behind your back so please don't be mad at me for bringing it up," she said wiping away a few tear drops that had fallen.
"Jen, please don't cry. I'm not mad at you," Pacey said. He wanted to go over to her and give her a hug but he was still sore despite the pain medication the doctor had given him. He hurt just relaxing here on the couch he didn't want to move. "To tell you the truth, I've been thinking along those lines myself," Pacey admitted as Jack crossed over and sat down on the arm of Jen's chair and drew her into a hug.
Pacey looked at the shocked faces of his friends. Suddenly he didn't want to hide anything from them anymore. He wanted to tell them everything.
"This isn't the first time my dad has hit me, although this is probably the worse beaten I've ever gotten, and I'm not the only one in my family he has hit. He hit my sisters, and my Mom all the time. That's why my sisters left Capeside right out of highschool."
"What about Doug?" Dawson asked. Pacey recalled Dawson's question the other afternoon about what had happened between him and Doug. He hadn't answered the question then but now he wanted to.
"I never saw my Dad hit Doug. As far as I can remember Doug has always gone out of his way to please our father. He's done everything our Dad ever wanted him to do. When Dad would get into one of his moods Doug would disappeared. I even remember one time when I was six years old, my Dad was hitting my mom, and I ran outside to get Doug. I pleaded with him to do something but he wouldn't. He said there was nothing he could do and walked away. After that day I didn't want anything to do with him. I wanted to be nothing like him. I thought he just didn't care about what was going."
"And now?" Joey asked softly from the floor.
"Now, I'm thinking maybe going out of the way to be the perfect son was Doug's way of dealing with it. His way of avoiding being hit. I never really even considered that before," Pacey said thinking of his conversation with his brother last night. "But then last night, before I knew about my Mom, when I was pleading with him to drop everything, to let it go he told me he couldn't do that. 'Not this time' he said. I always hated him for not doing anything. For being so heartless. I never even considered he was just finding a way to deal with things himself," Pacey told his friends. He could feel tears falling down his face and he didn't care. So what if people saw him cry. These people were his friends.
He fast forward, in his mind, through to later last night when his brother had told him about his mother. He thought about the words he had said to his brother. The words he wished now that he could take back. The last couple of days Doug had been trying to help him and he had been pushing him away and despite that he wouldn't go away. Even after he had said those awful words to him, Doug hadn't gone anywhere. All the resentment he had held inside for his brother for years started to melt away and he started to cry harder.
His friends were quiet. None of them were sure what to do. Each of them were trying to figure out what they should say, what they should do but none of them knew what to do.
"Pace?" Joey said softly, questionly from the floor wanting to know what it was that had suddenly gotten him so upset although she knew he had plenty to be upset aobut.
"I told him I wished he was the one that had died," Pacey said through his tears. "All that he has been trying to do for me these last few days and I tell him that. How could I say something like that?"
Joey moved past Dawson, closer to Pacey. Still kneeling on the floor she reached out and pulled Pacey close. "He knows you didn't mean it," she told Pacey softly her head resting on her shoulder. She thought back to the time when her Mom had died from cancer. She had said something along those lines to her sister at one point when they had been trying to readjust to life without their mother. She hadn't meant that but she still felt bad about saying it even though her sister had long ago forgiven her.
"What's going to happen to me now, Joey?" Pacey asked her softly through his tears.
"I don't know, Pacey," Joey told him honestly. "But no matter what your not alone. There are people who care about you Pace, remember that."
Joey held him until he had drifted off to sleep. She layed him gently back on the couch and took the blanket that Dawson handed her to cover him up. Then quietly she left the living room with her friends.
"Suddenly my life doesn't seem all that bad," Andie said quietly as they walked into the kitchen. Jack put his arm around his sister's shoulders.
"I wish there was something we could do," Jen commented. " I just feel so helpless."
"Just be there for him Jen," Mr. Leery told her as she sat down at the counter. "That goes for all of you. You can't change what has already happened but Pacey needs you know more than ever. This isn't something that is going to go away quickly."
He looked at his son and son's friends. This was one of those times we he wished he could shield his son from the real world but he knew it wasn't going to happen.
"Anyone hungry?" he asked setting down a plate of sandwiches on the counter. Slowly and quietly the kids all grabbed a sandwich and found a seat. They ate in silence again no one knowing what to say.
Lou- thanks for your very kind words. I'm glad you are enjoying the story so much and hope you keep enjoying it.
Helon- great ideas. Maybe you should write your own stories. I'm not really looking to make this a romance story per say between any of them but if it happens it happens - parts of this story seem to be writing itself. Hope you keep reading.
C-chan96- Thank you so much for your two wonderful reviews. You had me laughing through both of them. My first serenade. I'm so happy. Linkin Park ain't exactly a group I listen too but I still enjoyed the serenade very much. Please keep reviewing. I love reading your reviews and feel honored that you actually reviewed twice even though the second was more of a rant on your part but it's the thought that counts right. Thanks!
The drive out to the house seemed to take forever but eventually Doug reached the spot and pulled his car along the side of the road behind one of the other squad cars already there. Part of him couldn't believe that he had been there the night before. Those events seemed to have taken place so long ago.
Doug got out of the car and started across the lawn toward the house. The property was swarming with police officers and news reporters. Doug could see the glances that his co-workers shot his way. None of them were sure what to say to him or if they should even say anything. The state detectives who had been brought in on the investigation continued to go about what they were doing not giving Doug's presence a second thought. As far as they knew he was just another Capeside police officer. As for the reporters, it took them a little while to recognize who Doug was and once they did he was already half way across the front yard.
Once they recognized Doug Witter, the reporters moved to intercept them. They didn't get very far, though as they were stopped by the cops assigned to keep an eye on them and make sure they didn't get in the way of the investigation that was taking place.
Doug made his way to the house and walked up the front steps. Acting Sheriff Mitch Barnes, who was standing on the front porch talking to the detective in charge of the investigation, had noticed Doug's approach and as he came onto the porch excused himself from his conversation and walked over to Doug.
"Doug, I'm not sure this is the best idea?" Mitch whispered to him. "Why don't you just go home."
"I can't, sir" Doug told him evenly. Mitch Barnes could see the determination in the young officer's eyes. He could tell that it would be impossible to convince Doug to leave.
"Okay," Barnes said giving in. "We could actually use your help," he admitted as he walked with Doug toward the front door. "If you could tell us if you notice anything that is actually missing at least we'll have something to go on."
"What's that suppose to mean?" Doug asked his boss, looking over at him. The detective that had been talking to Barnes had fallen into step behind them and was the one to answer Doug's question.
"So far there is no indication that the story of a robbery is true. There is no signs of a force entry, and other than the allegedly missing items nothing seems to have been disturbed. Considering the source of the robbery story I think it was a made up story to cover up what really happened."
Mitch Barnes shot a warning look back at the detective. It didn't take long for the detective to figure out what that look meant. He had forgotten that the other officer was John Witter's son.
"Sorry," the detective muttered. Doug didn't say anything. He sure couldn't blame the guy for saying the same thing that he had been thinking ever since he had heard about what happened to his mother.
Doug almost couldn't believe that this was the house that he had grown up in. Not only was there crime scene tape up, there were detectives that were complete strangers to him swarming all over the place. It seemed unreal to him.
"Do you notice anything missing?" Mitch Barnes asked him. The question snapped Doug out of his thoughts and back to reality.
Doug looked around the familiar entry hall. He didn't see anything out of the ordinary. Without saying a word he walked into the living room still looking around. He so wanted to find something out of the ordinary. Something that indicated that his Dad might possibly be telling the truth. His eyes fell on the shelf along the one side of the room. There were several empty spots on the shelves and Doug searched his memory trying to remember what should have been in those spots.
"Two antique vases and a couple of my Dad's old books are missing from over there," Doug said pointing to the shelf. He saw the detective flip back through his notebook looking for something.
"That's what Mr. Witter told us had been taken from the house," the detective said.
"But just steal four things and leave everything else undisturbed. In my experience thieves aren't usually that particular," Mitch Barnes commented. Doug and the detective had both been thinking the same exact thing.
Some other detectives came up and started talking to the one who had been with Mitch and Doug.
"Is it okay if I look around the house?" Doug asked Barnes.
"Yeah, go ahead. Just keep in mind that this is a crime scene," Barnes told him. Doug nodded as he walked out of the living room. He walked slowly through the rooms on the first floor. Nothing else showed any signs of a robbery. Everything was just like he remembered it when he had been there the evening before.
Doug headed back toward the front entry way and the stairs. Although he tried not to look down he found his eyes drifted that way anyway. Drifted toward the white chalk outline that was on the wooden floor. Doug kept walking past it. He didn't need to stop and dwell on what that chalk outline meant. He didn't want to remember.
Doug slowly walked upstairs and started looking into the rooms up stairs. He was still hoping to find something else missing. Something torn apart but he found nothing. He was just walking out of his parents bedroom when something caught his eye. It was a small box sticking ever so slightly out from under the bed.
Doug instinctively put gloves on before kneeling down and pulling the box out, his boss' words still echoing in his mind. As much as he didn't want it to be this was a crime scene. His childhood home was a crime scene.
He reached out and pulled the box slowly out from under the bed. When he saw what was in the box he could feel anger rising up in him. He couldn't believe his Dad would go that low. Doug quickly stood up and grabbed a nearby lamp. With a yell he hurled the lamp toward the far wall where it shattered against the wall.
Pacey looked around the room at his friends who were all gathered. Dawson was sitting at the far end of the couch that Pacey was laying on. Joey was sitting on the floor next to him her back against the couch. Jen and Andie were sitting in the two easy chairs in the room and Jack had brought in one of the kitchen chairs and was sitting next to his sister. He had offered to bring Joey a chair but Joey said she was fine where she was.
No one had said much since everyone had gathered. He had confirmed that what his friends had heard on the television and from the town people was true and then they had grown silent. The silence was getting to Pacey but he was afraid to say anything. He was afraid he would say something to drive them away and he wanted them here. Even if nothing was said, he liked having them in the room. At least he didn't feel so alone.
"I'm sorry Pacey," Dawson finally said breaking the silence. Everyone look toward him and suddenly Dawson felt uncomfortable but he kept going saying what he had wanted to say all morning. "I'm supposedly your best friend and I haven't exactly been there for you. Hell, I didn't even start thinking something might be wrong at your house until a couple of days ago."
"You weren't the only one," Joey said softly from the floor beside him. Jen, Jack, and Andie all exchanged glances. They could only imagine how Dawson and Joey felt. They hadn't known Pacey as long as the other two had. They hadn't grown up with him and none of them, except for Andie, had been exactly close to him. They could use that to help them justify their not noticing anything out of the ordinary. Dawson and Joey couldn't. They had grown up with Pacey.
"Guys, its not your fault," Pacey told them. "Its not any of your fault," he added looking at the other three in the room, his glance lingering on Andie who had looked miserable from the moment she had showed up with Jack. "I'm the one who tried to hide what was going on. I didn't want anyone to know. Everyone else in the family kept quiet about if and I guess I didn't want any other reason for them to think I was the screw-up of the family. And look even when you guys started asking questions all I did was pushed you guys away."
"And we let you," Andie said softly. "We shouldn't have let you pushed us away like that. A real friend would have been there. Would've kept trying no matter what," she continued her thoughts thinking about what Pacey had done for her not long ago. She had tried several times to push him away but he hadn't given up on her like she had on him.
"The truth is I didn't want you guys involved in any of this. I didn't want any of you getting hurt."
"Is that why you always spent time at my house instead of us going to your house?" Dawson asked him.
"Yeah, that and the fact that I wanted to spend as much time away from my house as possible. I felt safe at your house Dawson, even if it was only for a short time."
There was silence in the room again. This time it was Jen who spoke up.
"Pacey this might be out of line, but I need to say it anyway," Jen said looking at the floor not at her friend. "I overheard more than what I originally told you guys I did. People are saying that there never was a robbery, that your father killed your mother. I didn't want to say anything but I don't know, its been bothering me and I needed to tell someone and I wouldn't feel right talking about something like that behind your back so please don't be mad at me for bringing it up," she said wiping away a few tear drops that had fallen.
"Jen, please don't cry. I'm not mad at you," Pacey said. He wanted to go over to her and give her a hug but he was still sore despite the pain medication the doctor had given him. He hurt just relaxing here on the couch he didn't want to move. "To tell you the truth, I've been thinking along those lines myself," Pacey admitted as Jack crossed over and sat down on the arm of Jen's chair and drew her into a hug.
Pacey looked at the shocked faces of his friends. Suddenly he didn't want to hide anything from them anymore. He wanted to tell them everything.
"This isn't the first time my dad has hit me, although this is probably the worse beaten I've ever gotten, and I'm not the only one in my family he has hit. He hit my sisters, and my Mom all the time. That's why my sisters left Capeside right out of highschool."
"What about Doug?" Dawson asked. Pacey recalled Dawson's question the other afternoon about what had happened between him and Doug. He hadn't answered the question then but now he wanted to.
"I never saw my Dad hit Doug. As far as I can remember Doug has always gone out of his way to please our father. He's done everything our Dad ever wanted him to do. When Dad would get into one of his moods Doug would disappeared. I even remember one time when I was six years old, my Dad was hitting my mom, and I ran outside to get Doug. I pleaded with him to do something but he wouldn't. He said there was nothing he could do and walked away. After that day I didn't want anything to do with him. I wanted to be nothing like him. I thought he just didn't care about what was going."
"And now?" Joey asked softly from the floor.
"Now, I'm thinking maybe going out of the way to be the perfect son was Doug's way of dealing with it. His way of avoiding being hit. I never really even considered that before," Pacey said thinking of his conversation with his brother last night. "But then last night, before I knew about my Mom, when I was pleading with him to drop everything, to let it go he told me he couldn't do that. 'Not this time' he said. I always hated him for not doing anything. For being so heartless. I never even considered he was just finding a way to deal with things himself," Pacey told his friends. He could feel tears falling down his face and he didn't care. So what if people saw him cry. These people were his friends.
He fast forward, in his mind, through to later last night when his brother had told him about his mother. He thought about the words he had said to his brother. The words he wished now that he could take back. The last couple of days Doug had been trying to help him and he had been pushing him away and despite that he wouldn't go away. Even after he had said those awful words to him, Doug hadn't gone anywhere. All the resentment he had held inside for his brother for years started to melt away and he started to cry harder.
His friends were quiet. None of them were sure what to do. Each of them were trying to figure out what they should say, what they should do but none of them knew what to do.
"Pace?" Joey said softly, questionly from the floor wanting to know what it was that had suddenly gotten him so upset although she knew he had plenty to be upset aobut.
"I told him I wished he was the one that had died," Pacey said through his tears. "All that he has been trying to do for me these last few days and I tell him that. How could I say something like that?"
Joey moved past Dawson, closer to Pacey. Still kneeling on the floor she reached out and pulled Pacey close. "He knows you didn't mean it," she told Pacey softly her head resting on her shoulder. She thought back to the time when her Mom had died from cancer. She had said something along those lines to her sister at one point when they had been trying to readjust to life without their mother. She hadn't meant that but she still felt bad about saying it even though her sister had long ago forgiven her.
"What's going to happen to me now, Joey?" Pacey asked her softly through his tears.
"I don't know, Pacey," Joey told him honestly. "But no matter what your not alone. There are people who care about you Pace, remember that."
Joey held him until he had drifted off to sleep. She layed him gently back on the couch and took the blanket that Dawson handed her to cover him up. Then quietly she left the living room with her friends.
"Suddenly my life doesn't seem all that bad," Andie said quietly as they walked into the kitchen. Jack put his arm around his sister's shoulders.
"I wish there was something we could do," Jen commented. " I just feel so helpless."
"Just be there for him Jen," Mr. Leery told her as she sat down at the counter. "That goes for all of you. You can't change what has already happened but Pacey needs you know more than ever. This isn't something that is going to go away quickly."
He looked at his son and son's friends. This was one of those times we he wished he could shield his son from the real world but he knew it wasn't going to happen.
"Anyone hungry?" he asked setting down a plate of sandwiches on the counter. Slowly and quietly the kids all grabbed a sandwich and found a seat. They ate in silence again no one knowing what to say.