Daryl didn't speak for three weeks.
Beth had seen her fair share of grief, but never like this. Daryl was broken. Something inside of him had snapped in two, and it made him unhinged. He flinched at every sudden move, pulling away from even the slightest touch Beth offered to give him. He kept to himself, and whenever a member of the group thought to approached him, he immediately retreated. He fell away almost completely, keeping his distance and only nodded as a response to anyone's questions. Though occasionally deterred, Beth kept close. Even when he ignored her, she stayed put. The words Maggie had said to her echoed in the back of her mind with every passing day.
Don't let him pull away from you.
I've seen him try to do it before, when things got hard.
But if I know you at all, you're the one person that can keep that from happenin'.
She wouldn't let that happen.
Things changed the day it finally rained. They'd been walking for days, endlessly pushing forward to a destination none of them were certain of anymore. After leaving Richmond, the group thought it best to keep moving forward. They'd made it all this way, so it was only right to cover that last bit of distance to D.C. This made Abraham extremely happy. Thinking about it, he and his two companions were the only ones with smiles on their faces.
Everyone else was lost.
Beth could see it in their eyes. There was a vacant look in all of them that made it hard to conceal the loss of hope in all of their hearts. Noah's town was supposed to be a miracle. It was supposed to be the ray of light at the end of a very long and very dark tunnel. But it wasn't. It had been just like everything else. A disappointment. A crushing reality check.
But when it rained, it was like the water washed away all of the sadness that had been cloaking the group for weeks. Beth felt clean in a way that meant more than just the dirt stripping from her skin. She felt renewed. They were going to make it to Washington, and no matter how long it took, Daryl was going to be okay again.
Their eyes met across the pavement.
Droplets of rain fell into her field of vision and streamed ribbons across their faces, but under all of that Beth saw a flicker of something in Daryl that had been temporarily extinguished. She went to him, taking one furtive step at a time, and she took his hand. He allowed the touch, and then he allowed something more.
He laced his fingers between hers and squeezed.
"It's okay to let yourself feel it," she told him.
He nodded once then spoke only to her. "I know."
She couldn't have been sure, but she thought she saw tears mixing with the raindrops on his cheeks. She gave him a reassuring nod.
"I can't lose anyone else," he said. "Not you."
Beth swallowed. "As long as we stick together, no matter what happens, we'll have each other."
He took her face in his hands, holding her steady with his palms to merely stand there and admire her. She felt unease, knowing that the others could clearly see them, but as if reading her thoughts Daryl shook his head and said, "I don't care."
He touched his lips to hers, and he tasted like the sky.
Everything fell away - the guilt, the fear, the hesitation - the rain washed it all onto the road and it dissipated under their feet.
Beth separated his mouth from his only long enough to tell him what she'd wanted to say out loud for months. "I love you," she said. "And I don't think I'm ever gonna stop."
"Never?" he tested.
"Never."
The next day they found an RV. It was like the world was finally offering them a place at the table. Glenn managed to get it running in a few short hours, and then they were back on the road. They were only thirty miles outside of the city, and Beth could see the tops of several well-known buildings in the distance. She peered out the window next to Maggie and took it all in with a giant smile on her face.
"Where're we going once we get into the city?" Sasha started, asking Eugene who was sitting across from her at table.
"I'm not exactly sure of that just yet," he said. "I've got two locations in mind that I think could be a good place to start. But we'll just have to scope out the situation once we get within range."
"You don't have a plan?" Glenn asked, stepping into the conversation.
"I do," Eugene countered. "It just involves a great many variables that need sortin' out beforehand."
Sasha stared in great interest. Her eyes narrowed, then she shifted the topic to something more important. "So what is the cure exactly?"
Eugene instively curled into himself. "That's classified."
She lifted an eyebrow. "What if something happens to you and we have nothing to go on?" she suggested. "If you die, what then?"
"That's not gonna happen," Abraham chimed in. "Miss Espinosa and I are here to ensure Eugene's safety at any cost. Don't you worry about him dyin'."
Sasha exchanged a look of concern with Maggie, but Beth couldn't hold back her smile. At least they were doing something. They had a purpose - one that was much bigger than walking aimlessly out on the road.
She got up from her seat next to Maggie and headed towards the back of the RV. As she walked, she caught stares from the others. They were subtle, but she felt their eyes as she moved. They'd all seen her and Daryl kiss outside in the rain, and she'd expected a cacophony of questions and exclamations from them, but no one had even acknowledged it. Not a single person. It was almost disappointing. She'd built it up to be such a huge deal in her head that their lack of interest made her feel… let down. But she told herself it was for the best. Everyone's heads were in a different game. They had bigger things to focus on, and her secret relationship with Daryl was probably the last concern on everyone's minds.
Daryl, however, was still on edge.
It was his initiation that caused the display of affection, and part of him was starting to wish he could take it back. Beth knew he felt stupid for being so open and careless, but she didn't want him to think it was wrong. Finally, after tiptoeing around the group for weeks, they could just be with each other. Simple. Just like before.
He was hunched in a chair next to the window in the back bedroom of the camper. Beth sat down on the bed across from him and stuffed her hands beneath her thighs. She sank deep into the mattress, and she was suddenly extremely overwhelmed with how wonderful it would be to lie back on that bed and sleep for a while. With Daryl next to her.
"Why're you back here by yourself?" she asked, playfully nudging his leg with the tip of her boot.
He faced her carefully, then blinked several times, as if pulling himself from a daze. "Nothin'," he said. "Just thinkin'."
"About what?"
"About the cure." He turned to the window again. "Do they really think it's gonna fix everything that's happened? We can't go back now. We're too far gone."
"We get to come back," she countered. "It's not too late for anyone."
He shrugged. "Some of the stuff I've done… I can't just fit that into a normal life again. It don't make sense."
Beth freed her hands and laced them in her lap. She stared at her fingers, noting all of the cuts and scraps that were beginning to create scars. "It doesn't matter," she said. "There are still good people, Daryl."
He gave her a timid smile. "There's you."
Her stomach fluttered. It was ridiculous how much he could make her feel like a little girl, getting riled up over compliments and small touches, and other times make her feel the complete opposite. He brought out so many beautiful things in her in so many beautiful ways, but most of all, he made her feel important. She wasn't just a member of the group, she was part of it. She was useful, because she was strong.
He gestured for her to come sit with him by the window. She got up to join him but the chair was too small, so she eased herself onto his lap. Just as she'd made herself comfortable, Rick gave a small knock.
Beth jumped slightly, but stayed put. Daryl's hand latched onto her arm where he'd been caressing it lightly with his fingers. His immediate reaction to protect her never faltered. Not even for a second.
"Beth, can I speak to Daryl privately for a moment?" Rick asked, stepping into the bedroom.
She nodded and removed herself from Daryl with as little affection as possible, but that proved to be very difficult. Daryl grunted and situated himself in a stiffer position, raising his chest and crossing his arms. He nodded to Beth once, and Rick gave her the same acknowledgment as she passed. When she stepped into the narrow hallway, the felt the door immediately close behind her. It wasn't like they'd done anything wrong, but something felt like Daryl was about to be in trouble.
Daryl cleared his throat and tried to pull his shit together, but it proved unhelpful now that Rick had seen everything so clearly. What had he done? His emotions took the better of him and had clearly made the wrong decision. This was what he'd been waiting for. Rick would finally see what scum he really was. He'd think Beth was being taken advantage of and there was nothing Daryl could do to defend himself. What proof did he have that he loved this girl, other than what he felt inside? He couldn't rip his heart out and very well show it to the world. If it were possible, he'd lay it out on the table for everyone to see, but it wasn't. His feelings were stuck inside, both figuratively and literally.
"I'm not gonna say what you think," Rick started. He stood in that pose that meant he was serious, carefully leaning forward with every word. He shook his head, obviously still trying to process what he was having to address. "Just tell me it's more than what I think."
Daryl began fidgeting with his hands, tapping the window ledge with his fingers. The sound fell short and lacked any echo in such close quarters. He continued to do it.
Rick tried again to reel in Daryl's full attention. "I'm just here as a friend. As your brother."
Daryl's focus promptly snapped into place.
Maybe Rick would believe him after all.
"I love her," Daryl said plainly. "That's it."
Rick began to smile. It took over half his face, and Daryl thought it looked out of place only because it hadn't made an appearance in so long.
"Daryl Dixon," he muttered, shaking his head in near disbelief. "You've done it. You've finally done it."
Daryl scoffed. "Done what?"
"For one thing you've proven to everyone you're not a hermit." A laugh escaped, and then he said, "What gets me is that you've allowed someone that close." Rick sobered his expression. "I get it. I've always gotten it, and I've never questioned it. From the beginning, I saw that I could trust you, because you trusted so much in others. Not in a way that meant they were reliable, but you could see them for what they were. You just know things, and I think that's why everyone looks to you. You're cautious. You set me right when I'm not in my place, and I appreciate that."
Daryl chewed roughly on his bottom lip. Hearing all of this was a lot to take in, but he was grateful.
"I can see how much she means to you," Rick added after dropping his gaze to the floor. "You deserve it. Don't let that go."
He took a step back and slid open the door, leaving Daryl with a new sense of hope that he hadn't felt before. It was different than what he felt with Beth. It was bigger, and it spread further. It wasn't just the two of them anymore. They really did have a family, and that was all Daryl had ever wanted.
Beth busied herself with a puzzle Michonne and Carl had found in a compartment under the cushions. She arranged the edges in a square and tried not to think about what Rick and Daryl could possibly be discussing in the back room. As Carl sorted the remaining pieces by color, something jolted the vehicle, causing a few stray bits to fall to the floor.
"What was that?" Carl let out hastily under his breath.
Before Beth could respond, she was falling sideways.
The RV had turned on its side and was skidding a path of destruction across the pavement. Beth felt the sharp sting of glass on her arm and cheek, then something hard fell against her head. The last thing she saw before closing her eyes was her sister. Maggie tried to reach for her hand, but she was already slipping away.
Everything around her faded to black, and then the world went still.