CHAPTER 10
I walked up to my room, and I sat down on the couch and I just let tears pour out of me for a while. But I let my mind wander. Maybe I should call Charlie. But my voice didn't sound the same so there was no point in that. And Renee, all of this was so sudden I paid no attention to the fact that Renee was going to go out and search for me. Well she didn't know anything about Alaska. She wouldn't try coming here. I was just going to have to learn to live without them. I was bored. That was fantastic because I had a whole eternity left in front of me and I was bored.
Maybe I should go shopping. I gasped, and shuddered. What had happened to me? Did becoming a vampire suddenly turn me into shopping maniac? I hoped not. So I got up off the couch and walked out. I had to force myself not to open Edward's door and see what he was doing.
I went outside and I ran through the forest. It was extremely exhilarating. And when I stopped it looked like I was standing there the whole time. Not a hair out of place.
I ran for a long time. It was getting dark and even though my new vision let me see in the dark I decided to go back to the house. I got back quickly and I found a garden in the back of the house. I sat down on a bench and I watched the sun set. I heard someone walk into the garden. I looked up and saw it was Edward.
He was here to ruin the moment. I got up ready to leave, but he stopped me.
"No don't go. I just came out here to think. I didn't know you were out here." I nodded and I sat back down. What was I doing? I needed to get away from here. I should leave. But I didn't.
He sat down on the bench next to me. I froze. What was he thinking? Did he not remember getting slapped, and then losing to me at wrestling? He would never learn.
"Isabella I want to talk to you." I had a very strong urge to punch him again. But I didn't, I would hear him out.
I was totally pathetic.
I nodded.
"I guess that talking to you today didn't work out so well."
I snorted. "You think?"
He grinned. "Well you slap really hard."
"Are you here to tell me how hard I slap or do you want to talk to me?" I was losing the little patience I had left with me.
"Look Bella. I mean Isabella; I had a reason to leave." He paused looking waiting for my reaction. I kept face expressionless and I waited. He continued.
"Paul was willing to kill you if I didn't leave. He wanted me to leave so Jacob could have his chance with you. When you picked me over him, he was messed up and Paul wasn't having that."
I stared at him incredulously. "And you bought that?"
He sighed. "From his thoughts he was a hundred percent on being ready to kill you. And couldn't stand putting you in any danger, so I thought if I left you could have a happy normal life with Jake and you wouldn't be in anymore danger."
I shook my head. This was probably some lie that he cooked to gain my trust back or something.
"And then when I came in to leave, you had known. And I was shocked as I was when I saw that it was you with the rest of the family. "
I was silent. I had a hard time taking it all in. "Isabella I still love-."
I cut him off. "Don't say it. Please don't. I can't hear it."
I stood up and I was about to leave when he grabbed my hand. "How am I supposed to fix this? How am I supposed to make everything alright again? "
He could dig a hole and bury himself under it and stay there for a good three centuries. But that was a bit extreme.
"Ok." I took a deep unneeded breath. "Pretend that nothing between us ever happened. Pretend that we just met. We can be friends but nothing more."
His gold eyes burned into my red ones. "Is that really what you want?" He whispered.
"Yes that's exactly what I want. I want us to be friends. I want to pretend that nothing ever happened."
"Than that's how it's going to be. I'll do anything to gain your trust back."
I nodded and I started to make my way back to the house.
"Wait," He called.
"I turned around. " Since we're friends now can I call you Bella?" I tried really hard not to smile but the corners of my lips were twitching.
"Yes. You can call me Bella." He smiled. And I smiled back.
When I got to my room, I was overwhelmed. Did I want everything to go back to normal? Did I want Edward to become part of my life again? Could I really start over with him?
I didn't know.