Disclaimer: I do not own any part of the Harry Potter universe. All characters belong to the amazingly talented J.K. Rowling.

Chapter 10: A Heart Broken in Two

Lily

After dinner I was exhausted but happy to be finished with everything I had to do. I sat their reading for a while answering the occasional questions of my friends and trying to get Remus to look at me. I really hope he has figured out that I don't care that he is a werewolf but there is a part of me that knows that he hasn't yet put two and two together and figured out that my rant in class was because I wanted to support him and to stop our stupid teacher from spreading prejudice.

When we all went to bed, I crawled up to my pillows and started to pack my bag for tomorrow. When I picked up my care of magical creatures textbook two letters fell out. I had forgotten about the letters from Petunia and my parents in my haste to read Molly's letter. I placed them to the side and finished packing my bag before settling back into my pillows and opening the letters. I read Mum and Dad's first

To our dearest little darling Lily

Hello from home sweetheart. We are all missing you so much! We recently had Pet's boyfriend Vernon to our house for a quiet dinner. He is an interesting man. No he is bloody not, Lily dear your mother is lying. The man was a bore and only spoke about his job and how much he is earning. I swear I would rather take about table salt. Ignore your father dear he has been rather grouchy today. I think he hasn't been sleeping properly again, which is probably my fault as I have a cold and am snoring the roof off. Don't worry though I am on the mend and your father should start getting more sleep soon.

How is school honey? Dating a nice boy yet? You had better not be. All boys must stay more than 2 metres away from you all points in time. If I hear that you are dating I will hunt down the boy down. I know he can't retaliate because you can't use magic outside school. Sorry love your father is being a pain. It's a good thing we love him, right? Are you getting all your work done? How are Mary, Alice and Marlene? And Severus, is he enjoying the semester? Are the Gryffindor boys still harassing you?

Home is rather boring without you here. We miss you so much princess. We will see you soon.

Love you with all our hearts,

Mum and Dad (the people who gave you life and raised you)

I smiled at my parents letter. Whenever I read something from them it always made me smile. They had this way of writing that made me feel as if I was back home sitting on the couch with them as they asked about my day. I loved and missed them so much it hurt. I really wanted to go home for Christmas. I swear I was developing withdrawal symptoms from not seeing them often enough.

I turned to Petunia's letter and slid the single sheet out of the envelope. She never really wrote much so I wasn't surprised by the small letter however a sense of dread washed over me as I unfolded the page.

You have not answered my previous letter, yet you have answered mum and dad's so I am taking that to mean that you are ignoring me. I want to inform you that if you do return home I will never forgive you. I can deal with your freakishness as long as it is hidden away from the world but I refuse to let it jeopardise the one thing that is important to me. If you come home I will hate you more than I already do.

Don't come home. You are not wanted. You never were. Why do you think mum and dad sent you off to the freak school? It's because nobody loves you.

James

For some reason tonight I couldn't sleep, I just didn't feel tired. It was like I had some irrational dread that I couldn't suppress. I just kept thinking of the letters that Lily hadn't read this morning. Last time she had got really upset it had been because of a letter, and a part of me was scared that she would be upset again. It hurt me to see her upset.

We had come up to bed about half an hour earlier than the girls and the guys had all fallen asleep pretty quickly. I started to read some of my history of magic textbook in the hope that it would help me to fall asleep. After about five minutes I got bored and decided to look at the map. I always found it fun to look for couples hooking up in the broom closets, their foot prints intermingling. It was always a little disturbing when I saw it happen with Sirius though.

Sirius

I got woken barely an hour into sleep by James shaking me rather harshly.

"Sirius, mate, you have to wake up. Mate, Padfoot, I need your help. Brother. Paddy. Wake the hell up."

I finally opened my eyes enough to glare at him for waking me up but my expression shifted to concern when I saw the frown lines on James's forehead. "Mate, it's Lily. She just went flying from her dormitory. She was running towards the room of requirement. Something has to be wrong and I am worried. Please can you just go look after her. Here." James shoved the cloak and map into my hands and started dragging me from bed. It took a while for my brain to catch up and tell me that Lily was upset. A protective side of my heart demanded that I go straight to her and make sure she was okay, but my brotherly part of me lead me over to James.

"Prongs, brother, it is going to be okay. I'll make sure she is okay. I promise. By tomorrow morning she will be laughing again. I promise. I will take care of her." I almost solemnly swore but a part of me was worried that I wasn't going to be able to do it, and I never wanted to break a solemn swear.

James nodded his head and I bolted from the room. I looked at the map as I sprinted down the stairs and noticed that Lily was already pacing in front of the room of requirement. I took several secret passages and arrived in front of it in no time. I paced a couple of times thinking "I have to help Lily, show me Lily." Eventually a door opened up and sitting on the ground in front of me was Lily. Or what was left of Lily. There was a part of me that broke when I saw her. It was as if someone had torn out her heart and stomped on it. The look of utter devastation was worse than anything I had ever seen before. I would rather have been tortured by my father again than witness Lily in this state. She was broken and a part of me believed that the damage was irreparable.

"She hates me." Her voice sounded dead, as if she wasn't capable of emotion. The room was bland, as if she hadn't been able to even imagine something to comfort her. She sat on her knees in the middle of the barren room with tears streaming down her face. But to be honest I didn't think she even knew she was crying. I walked slowly towards her careful not to scare her and dropped myself next to her.

"Lily..."

"How did you know where I was?"

"Um, James was about to go downstairs when he saw you run from the common room, he figured that you must be upset seeing as how you broke curfew and asked me to come and check on you." I managed to tell her a version of the truth while maintaining the secrets that we marauders shared only between ourselves.

"She hates me Sirius." Her dead voice sent shivers through me.

"I'm sure she doesn't actually hate you. You're her sister." She thrust a letter into my hand and I instantly recognised the handwriting of Petunia from the previous letter I had read. My eyes got caught on one comment in particular "will hate you more than I already do." Goddamn that girl is a bitch. Who could ever speak to Evans like that? I mean even when I was anger with her for dobbing us in or for being a general party pooper, I still could never hate her. I didn't even hate her despite the fact that she had turned down my best friend and brother thousands of times and crushed him with every "no".

I didn't know what to say so I just scooped her into my arms and held her to my chest. After about an hour she whispered "I am staying her for Christmas." There was no excitement in her voice. No Lily-ness. Just pain and misery and I for one could not blame her. Her heart had just been broken in two, and by her sister no less.

At around three in the morning Lily finally cried herself to sleep. I had imagined up a sofa and fire at around one so I was sitting comfortably with Lily lying on my lap and a wet patch on my knee where her tears had seeped through. I gently pulled my mirror from my pocket, careful not to wake Lily and whispered James' name into it.

He answered almost immediately "Your breaking your promise aren't you." His voice was so matter of fact that I couldn't do anything but nod. "I knew when you didn't solemnly swear that you were worried. How bad is she?"

"Prongs, brother, she is broken. Seriously I don't know what to do. Her sister wrote her a letter telling her that she hated her and not to go home because she wasn't wanted. Who could ever tell that to Lily? I mean yeah I expect it when it comes from my family but for someone to say that to Lily... I just don't understand it."

"Where is she now?"

"She finally cried herself to sleep a little while ago. She is currently lying in my lap asleep." James just nodded at me.

"So she will be staying here for Christmas?"

"Yeah she will, but I know it is killing her. She misses her parents heaps and she really wanted to go home to see them."

"Paddy, you just gave me a great idea." James grinned at me. "Go to sleep mate. Keep Lily in there for tomorrow and I will organise everything. Don't worry I will get Remus to help."

"Mate, when it comes to you and Lily, I know you would only do what was best." We said goodnight and I slumped down on the couch and fell asleep.

A.N. hello my little dumplings! You are amazing if you just read that chapter. Follow me on tumblr at