Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail or any of its characters; they belong to the one and only Hiro Mashima.
I do own the idea for the fic though.
Rebellion.
(A I.-.-.I Kuroyagi I.-.-.I original fan-fiction story.)
Nexus 0010: Because having a 00- before ANY number is kewl!
(Translation: There's a certain something in which we, males, think when we see two 0's together.)
(Shorter translation: Yes, we are THAT lewd.)
Inside a dark place of the guild...
-Kuroyagi- So the voting is over… *looks at the poll sheet*
-Shedauwz- Yeah…
-Shinji- How sad…
-Roxas- I'm going to pay a year of beer for naught… *cries silently on a corner*
-Sable- *shrugs* I've got to see some cuteness… I regret nothing.
-Kuroyagi- I almost died… thrice… *sweatdrops*
-Shedauwz- I saw my ancestors… many times… *sighs*
-Shinji- Mira gave me an herbal tea… I feel… at peace… *calmly sips his tea*
-Roxas- Okay, so what now?
-Kuroyagi- I don't know… *looks around* Kagura locked me here with you all…
-Shedauwz- Erza told me there was… *blushes* some 'interesting things' here…
-Roxas- Cana sent me here to look for more booze…
-Sable- Mavis ordered me to watch over you guys…
-Shinji- …
-Kuroyagi- Shinji… uh, why are you here?
-Shinji- I just followed you.
-Shedauwz- I see… *sweatdrops* did they trick us?
-Roxas- Seems like it…
-Sable- But… why?
*loud cheers outside*
-Kuroyagi- *leans ear on the door* It seems they are having fun…
-Shedauwz- *does the same* Yeah… everyone's lively…
-Roxas- *eyes twitch* Think they got rid of us?
-Kuroyagi- I bet they did… *sighs*
-Shedauwz- *eyes narrow* Hey… I can hear the voice of an author out there…
-Others- What?! *eyes widen*
-Shedauwz- He seems to be… *gasps* damn!
-Kuroyagi- What?! Tell us!
-Shedauwz- *shakes head* Believe me; you don't want to know…
Outside, in the guild hall...
"Okay, the authors are gone! We can do with Natsu whatever we want!" Cana yelled excitedly to the women around her, all of them cheering for their success on driving the helpers out. She raised a mug to the air. "Is the man ready?!"
"Yes, sir… sorry, Natsu…" Jet, Droy and Max answered to Cana's question and later apologized to the pink-haired guy tied to a post with nothing on him but boxers. Luckily for them, he was unconscious.
"...Hmm, even I know what I'd do with Natsu for a full day..." Bizca looked up in thinking, her eyes showing a dreamy glint in them. 'I'll have him watch over Asuka while Al and I start to work on our 2nd child... teehee!'
Lucy, who happened to be close to the female gunner, felt her jaw hitting the floor. "Not Bisca too?!"
"I guess he's even good with MILFs..." Levy, who was standing next to the celestial spirit mage, shrugged; shaking her head in disbelief at the popularity of the fire dragon-slayer with women, silently thanking that it wasn't the same with Gajeel.
"Wait… doesn't that mean that Ultear's got a stake in this...?" The blonde side glanced to the brunette standing close to the door of the room where the authors were locked in; Meredy was standing by her side.
Ultear's ears heard what she said with a slight twitch, her frustration at being included –again- made her bark her thoughts. "Do NOT drag me into this fiasco. I'm not so shallow as to completely blow all these girls away with my womanly charms just to have Natsu for a mere 24 hours..."
"Aw, Ultear~ You said that you'd get him to teach me about men!" Meredy, though, showed she had other plans.
"He's more of a wild animal... And I never said that!"
"But I like animals!"
An awkward silence ensued after that… innocent comment.
"Not this kind of 'animal' you don't..." Ultear whispered to herself, the sides of her lips twitching uncomfortably. "He'd exhaust you within the first hour..."
Hearing this, the proud –and pervert- Titania, couldn't remain quiet. "Natsu's stamina is far more than an hour!"
"Oh? And how would you know, Ms. Jellal-sexual...?" Neither could Kagura.
"Seriously… will you STOP with that already!?"
"No, as I said before, it's true. Immoral hussy!"
"What did you call me, you underhanded harlot!?" She immediately lunged forward with swords in hand.
At the sides, Meredy could only watch in cluelessness. "...all this over an idiot?"
"...Meredy, a lesson for you: When it comes to love and lust, women are no different than men." Ultear nodded to her own reasoning, preferring to close her eyes and avoid watching such a degrading act of women fighting over a man like desperate old hags.
"...Oh, I hope I won't become like this." Her foster-daughter said watching Erza and Kagura going at each other with full magic.
After a moment of fighting and boisterous yells from the women now encircling the dragon-slayer, Ultear groaned. "...I can't BELIEVE that I'm in this mess..."
That's what you get for being in a crack fic.
"I mean, he's handsome and all, and his stamina is no joke, but seriously...no. I'm not 'that' into young men." The time wizard explained to the author, though, it looked like she was trying to convince herself more than the others.
*stares* Uh-huh~
"..." Deadly glare.
*smiles forcefully* Suuure you are. So what's up with the black lingerie you got on reserve in your closet in the possibility of a surprising victory in the polls?
"That's...! That's not mine!?" Ultear gave a start at being discovered.
Oh come now, I know that Meredy has grown (significantly) in the last few years but she does NOT fill out that bra like you can. *grins*
Ultear had the decency to blush at the words while Meredy looked back and forth in between her chest and her foster mother's. "STOPPIT!"
Erza, having halted her quarrel with Kagura, looked at the brunette and the author with narrowed eyes; an answer like a snarl coming out of her. "Natsu shall be mine! I shall permit no other...!"
But she was stopped, mid-proclamation, by an anima portal opening up near the stairs to the second floor of the guild.
"TOH!" No other than Knightwalker came out of it, walking calmly to stand in the middle of the room; ignoring the surprised faces of everyone, she proclaimed what her Earthland counterpart was about to. "I shall claim the Dragon of Earthland for my own!"
"OH 'HELL' NO!" Erza instantly felt her anger building up again.
...but you got your own already…
Knightwalker smirked at Erza as she blushed with an astonished expression. "True...but I would like to see how both of them perform...at the same time..."
Erza's face went aflame at imagining it, though, her anger was still present. "BEGONE, YOU SUCCUBUS!"
"T-two of him...at once?" Ultear glanced at the 2 red-heads with a rose eyebrow, the thought also crossing her mind along a slight pink in her cheeks. "My my, who knew she had it in her... such a pervert..."
Knightwalker stuck her considerable chest out with pride. "I have nothing to be ashamed about. And if this Natsu is anything like mine...heh heh..." She was already drooling in expectation.
Ultear sweatdropped at the sight of the prideful knights drooling at perverted thoughts. 'They even drool the same...ugh...'
Erza… well, being Erza, couldn't help but ask the most important question in her lewdly mind. "J-just out of curiosity...how big is he...?"
Knightwalker smirked lewdly with a blush. "They are not named after Dragons for nothing, if you catch my drift..."
Erza nearly swooned "...oh...my..."
Ultear blinked twice at what she was hearing, thinking over her decision again. 'Maybe...I should rethink this...?' She just happened to glance towards Natsu, who was starting to wake up, meaning his blood was circulating and making other 'thing' wake up as well. The time mage went wide eyed. '...oh...DAMN.'
*snickers diabolically* You know, I just came up with something to solve this…
Inside the improvised-prison in which the other writers were...
-Kuroyagi- For what I can hear… it sounds like it IS him… *sighs*
-Shedauwz- He's turning this to the ecchi side… *scratches scalp*
-Shinji- Isn't that great? *grins*
-Roxas- I have no objection to that… *grins as well*
-Sable- *imagines Mavis and Meredy going ecchi* …I…agree with them… *covers his nosebleed*
-Kuroyagi- *sweatdrops* Okay, we will let him continue…
-Shedauwz- Hey, wasn't your birthday today?
-Kuroyagi- *nods* It is…
-Shinji- Congratulations.
-Roxas- Yeah!
-Sable- Cheers for you.
-Shedauwz- How old are you anyway? *thinks*
-Kuroyagi- H-hey, they are talking again! *presses ear on the door with a shaky smile*
-Others- *sweatdrop* You don't have to tell us if you don't want to…
Outside, in the guild hall...
"I am NOT posing in these frilly things! WHY ARE YOU IDIOTS HELLBENT ON SHOVING ME WITH A FLAMEBRAINED IDIOT!?" Ultear growled to the readers and members of Fairy Tail, not liking the idea of the author managing the story now.
Because it amuses us.
Ultear glowered.
Besides, how many women can claim to defeat Erza? Even in something like this?
Ultear stopped her glare and pondered about the question, it was… kind of true. "I don't care about the prize, I just want to be the woman to beat Erza." She nodded with determination.
That's the spirit, Ultear-san! Truly you are Fiore's most beautiful (and most wanted, but that ADDS to it)!
The time mage sighed. "...you're hopeless."
"Ufufufu~" Near the entrance, Erza was laughing smugly, already believing in her complete victory. Knightwalker was nowhere to be seen. She and Erza went outside to talk and after that, only Scarlet came back, a strange glint in her eyes. "Are you ready for your defeat, Ultear?
"Ara, I think someone needs to be brought down a peg...and I know how." Ultear also went outside, along with Meredy, both returning to the hall with cloaks covering their bodies. She had an evil glint in her eyes as she took off her cloak, showing that she was wearing a sexy doctor's outfit completed with glasses. "C'mon out, Meredy~"
"Hi everyone~" The pinkette was wearing a nurse's outfit with a mini-skirt and the first two buttons undone, waving her hand enthusiastically. "Be sure to vote for my mama, ne~? We'll BOTH treat you really good~"
Uh… the voting is over, you know?
At the sight, all the dirty old men in Fairy Tail went… "YEESSSSS!"
"Holy~! Did I hear that right!?" Wakaba's pipe was releasing smoke in shapes of hearts.
"I have not lived until today…" Macao was man-crying tears of joy.
"A 'mother-daughter' combo, one of the forbidden combos in a man's imagination to have..." Gildartz explained to the young mesmerized mages of the guild, his serious face failing completely, his composure going out the window. "I WANT~!"
Cana was quick to smash her booze over his head. "Stupid perverted father!"
Erza's face was RED, not believing her rival to be so cunning. "I... I can't believe it... you actually..."
Ultear laughed proudly at the reaction she got. "Nothing is too much to defeat you, Erza-saaan~"
"Me-Meredy-s-san, really!?" Juvia, on the other hand, could not believe the once sweet girl of Tenrou Island to be so bold.
"I kinda like the idea of being with Natsu-san and Ultear-mama at the same time..." The pinkette confessed shyly, blushing slightly as her hands tried to make her skirt cover her legs a bit more.
Natsu… to say it better… was 'fired up'.
Erza lowered her gaze at the setback, she didn't want to, but it looked like she would have to resort to her winning card.
"In that case... I must rely on her..."
"...eh?" Ultear titled her head in puzzlement.
"Come!" Gesturing towards the door, Erza called her secret weapon.
Knightwalker appeared wearing her normal armor.
"So, it's our turn, eh, Scarlet?" She smiled seductively at Natsu. "Mmm, I can't wait..."
"Just remember what you promised..." Titania's face was tomato red.
"Sure thing, I don't mind one bit, a foursome sounds delightful." She smirked as they both Re-Quip. "Prepare yourselves!"
Both Erza's were wearing the deathly Seduction Armor, their breasts pressed against one another with the swords saying "We 3 Natsu" on them.
Erza simply said one word, full of lust and desire. "Natsuuu~"
Knightwalker followed her lead, saying it the same way. "Hurry and come to our side~"
Unfortunately, the poor dragon-slayer was still tied to the post.
And all dirty old men in Fairy Tail went… "NOOO WAAAAAYY!" …again.
"Two Erza's...two Erza's at the same time...!" Wakaba's pipe broke in two.
"My brain says it's so wrong but my body says it's so right..." Macao was beside himself, his head was hurting but his eyes were enjoying the view.
"Another fearsome combo... the Twins Effect! How fearsome indeed~" Again, Gildartz explained the situation to the drooling and wide eyed younger mages, and yet again, he failed to keep his composure. "I WANT~!"
"Oh, I give up...!" Preferring to save her booze than breaking it on Gildartz everytime he loses it, Cana indulged herself with some barrels to forget about her perverted father and the things he does.
*wipes the blood from his nose* Oh...well...this is certainly a tough choice!
Mother-daughter combo or twins? Personally, I think it's a win-win either way… *winks*
Inside the improvised-prison in which the other writers were...
-Kuroyagi- *passes a bottle* I think it's over…
-Shedauwz- The drink? *shakes the bottle and finds it full*
-Kuroyagi- *shakes head* No… I mean Arakan…
-Roxas- *wipes blood from his nose* T-t-twins~
-Sable- *dreamy look* Nurse~ I need someone to take care of me~
-Shinji- *sighs* Seriously? Is that enough to turn you on?
-Kuroyagi- *chuckles* Let them, even I am having problems to stop imagining some twins' action too… *drools*
-Shedauwz- *laughs* Doctor Ultear~! I have a deathly disease~! And you are my cure~!
-Everyone- *laughs madly*
-Kuroyagi- * calms down* So… *scratches chin* think they will let us out now?
-Shinji- *shakes head* I don't think so…
-Roxas- *nods* He's having fun, and they too…
-Sable- Most probably, they will have us imprisoned here for the next chapters… *groans*
-Shedauwz- Hey! Cheer up! *gestures to the boxes and barrels around them* They locked us inside the cellar! *drinks a beer*
-Kuroyagi- That's right! *grabs a random wine* Let's take a break, people!
-Everyone- Aye sir! *bottles up*
-Kuroyagi- Happy birthday to me~! *empties the bottle in one go* I waaaant some Knight-Scarlet action~!
-Everyone- Aw hell yeah~!
To be continued.
Another year... huh... I'm glad, at this point in life I'm doing what I like with the people I care about, and I have no regrets! *laughs*
To the chapter, seems like someone else took charge of the story... Good God! I'll take the chance to party while Arakan's leading the characters to more insanity! *grins*
Meaning? I'll be absent this week, for reasons I left clear. *winks*
Good day to all of you!
Saludos.