Reasons that I Laugh and Breathe

by klikeszombies

AU. Brittany goes to college and meets Santana and the rest of New Directions. Even though life has been hard so far, and even though bad things still happen, she regrets nothing that has brought her here. Please read first authors note for more information!

10. Chapter 10

AN: This chapter is crazy long. It's also crazy late so no editing. I might seriously go back and work on this again tomorrow or the next day but in my state of exhaustion right now, I think it's not bad. So I'm posting.

As always, your thoughts and feelings are appreciated in the form of reviews and PMS. I honestly wouldn't be doing this if not for you people.

One more thing, I have a twitter now. twitter klikeszombies. Find me. Friend me. Listen to my stream of consciousness. Or unconsciousness like right now.

---

When Brittany wakes up Sunday morning she's not immediately sure why she did. Her first thought that registers is that Santana is still in her arms. So she must have slept through the rest of the night as well. The second thought that registers is that someone is knocking on Santana's bedroom door. "Come in" she says as quietly as she can with the hope that the person still heard. The door opens and Quinn peaks her head in.

"Hey Britt, is she still asleep?" Quinn realizes that this is a stupid question since she can see Santana's face, clearly passed out on Brittany's chest. Brittany's arm protectively around the shorter girl. Brittany just nods.

"Did she get sick last night? I noticed the bathroom garbage was missing."

"Sorry about that. I wasn't sure what else to use. Yeah she was sick for a while, and then woke up and was sick again. But she slept through the night after that so maybe she's feeling a little better."

"Well, I just came in to check and see if maybe you could wake her because her brothers are here to say goodbye." Brittany nods again, and Quinn leaves the room to let them know the girls will be right out. Brittany starts laying kisses onto Santana's now cool forehead and whispering words of adoration everywhere her lips fall. She runs her hand up and down Santana's arm as well for several seconds before the Latina stirs.

"Good morning baby. Are you feeling any better?" Santana rubs her face on Brittany's arm trying to wake herself up.

"A little." She confirms. "Do we have to get up?" She curls back into the blonde's side.

"Your brothers are here, so we have to say goodbye. Unless you don't feel well, and I can go tell them you aren't feeling up to it." She can feel Santana rotating against her.

"No I want to say goodbye. I'm up." They get up and Brittany throws her Lopez hoodie on and puts one around Santana so she doesn't get cold. She takes her hand and gently leads the way into the living room, Santana shuffling behind her.

"Hey sis. You feeling any better?" Gabe asks gently, patting her on the shoulder.

"A bit. I have a pretty amazing nurse." She looks over at Brittany who is just standing there watching her with a pretty expression on her face.

The boys all nod in agreement before they talk about bowling after they left. Apparently nothing eventful happened, which was probably for the best.

"Hey Britt could you get me a bottle of water?" Luis asked her. Brittany nods and walks toward the kitchen.

"Ok herminita, we wanted to give you this not around Brittany." Luis hands her what looks like a wad of cash. "It's from all of us. Consider it an early birthday gift or something. We just want you to have some extra cash so you can do something special for her. Put it in a date fund or whatever." Santana looks briefly, it has to be a couple hundred dollars.

"This is way to much guys you can't give me this." Santana goes to hand the wad back to Luis. They all cross their arms and give her the same look.

"Keep it. No discussions. We love you and can't wait to see you for Thanksgiving." They start kissing and hugging her goodbye just as Brittany comes back with the water, which Luis thanks her for. They all take turns hugging her as well. Brittany knows that she'll miss them and it strikes her as odd but not at all surprising that she's never actually thought about missing her own sister.

"Do you think we could go lay down some more?" Santana asks pitifully.

"Of course. Still not feeling well?" Santana shakes her head no with a pout. Mostly she feels tired, achy, needy, and cuddly. Lying down with her girlfriend fixes all of those things. She briefly considers telling Brittany about the money her brothers gave her but decides not to because what if she wants to surprise her?

After Brittany helped Santana get back under the covers she crawled in behind her and curled her body around the brunette. She felt the Latina press her back into her front, trying to get even closer so Brittany wrapped an arm around her, tracing small circles on the skin of her stomach underneath her tank top. "Have you thought about what you are doing for the show?" Santana asks after a few minutes of silence.

"Not really. I should do that. Do you know?" Santana shakes her head indicating that she doesn't know either. "San we should totally surprise each other! That would be so much fun." The Latina doesn't know how much fun it would be, waiting to see Brittany till everyone else does but the blonde sounds so excited that she agrees to it. "Can I ask you a favor?"

"Anything B."

"So, my roommate, her name is Rachel she is in the musical theater program. She's been I guess having trouble making friends and I was wondering if maybe we could invite her over for movie night or something. Not that I expect you guys to be friends with her because of me, but they might like her? And at least it would make her less sad." Santana rotates in Brittany's arms and barely brushes their lips together.

"I'm sure that'd be fine." Santana thinks it's a small miracle that, in spite of everything, Brittany is such an amazing person. She kisses her again.

After a few hours of small talk, kisses, and short naps Brittany gets a text form Sam asking if she's still up for the gym today. She should go, she thinks, because she hasn't done much in the past few days but the idea of leaving Santana here sick made her sad. Santana saw the inner conflict the blonde was having and solved it for her. "You should go ahead and go Britt. I'm feeling better and I have to figure out what I'm gonna do for the show anyway so if you want to go you should." After another half an hour of trying to force herself out of bed but getting distracted by Santana's lips (they're very distracting) she gets up to walk home to get her stuff for the gym.

When she gets to the gym Sam asks her how Santana is feeling. He learns in that moment not to get Brittany started talking about Santana, unless that is all you want to talk about. He doesn't mind really. He hasn't known her for very long but he cares about her, and he's notices a big difference in her happiness levels since things have picked up between her and the Latina. After they had been there for a while Sam runs into a guy from his department. They exchange greetings and then he turns to Brittany.

"Yo dude is this your sister? You guys look alike."

"She might as well be." Sam laughs and pulls Brittany into him. He's not sure if this guy was planning on hitting on her but he doesn't even want to see him try. He feels protective of the blonde. He feels protective of a lot of people in his life, it's in his nature. He starts off toward the track where they were originally headed, leaving the other guy behind without really saying goodbye, just kind of shooting him an awkward wave.

That night when she got back from the gym, Rachel was in the room and awake. She thinks maybe now would be a good time to talk to Rachel about Santana and maybe hanging out with them sometime soon. "Hey Rachel how was your weekend?"

"Productive. I got several extra ours of rehearsal in, which as I'm sure you know, you can never have enough of. I also talked with my father about the possibility of them visiting. How was the rest of yours?"

Now or never Brittany. She wasn't even sure why she was nervous, honestly. Rachel never indicated that she might have a problem with it, but she couldn't help but be weary. There were lots of stories about terrible roommate experiences and she didn't want this to be one of the things that turned their situation into one of those. "That's great. Could I maybe talk to you about something?"

"Absolutely Brittany. Is this performance related?"

"More like life related."

"Performance is life."

"Right. But what I mean is that, it's not really a big deal or anything. I just think you should know so in case you have a problem or something we might be able to deal with it. I don't know why you would be, you seem nice and unconservative. You just never know. There are stories all over the news about this sort of thing and I just don't want you to get upset someday after seeing something and then your anger or whatever negative thing you feel might affect my happiness. You know?"

The small brunette cocked her head to the side. "Brittany you haven't actually said anything."

"Oh. Yeah. Ok. Rachel. I am, well not totally sure what I am. But I'm at least bisexual, and I'm in a relationship with a woman." Brittany says with conviction.

"I'm glad you told me Brittney but you have nothing to worry about. I have two gay dads. I don't currently see a reason to label myself as anything, although I am quite certain I am attracted to anyone with a lot of talent." Brittany laughs thinking that Rachel is joking, but the look on the diva's face is no joke.

"Ahem. Ok. I guess then I was just wondering if it would be ok if Santana slept over sometimes. Nothing would happen. Just sleeping. But I want her to meet you and sometimes it might be easier to stay here."

"I don't think that's a problem as long as she doesn't interrupt my routines."

When Brittany gets to dance class Monday morning, the only thing she's really thinking about is lunch with Santana after her next class. It's weird to her that she misses Santana after not seeing her for less than twenty-four hours. And it's not like they hadn't been texting most of that time anyway. But when Santana is around, Brittany feels better, safer. Like somehow with her presence she's made existing just a little bit easier. Which is wonderful and scary because Brittany didn't know existing wasn't easy to begin with. But then again, she thinks maybe she did know that.

Before they begin class the teacher tells them that she has an announcement. The class of mostly first year students quiets down. "As you know, the winter dance concert is coming up. Due to some unforeseen circumstances there is an available slot. Lately I feel as though a lot of the dancers have gotten complacent, thinking that they know before an audition who is going to cast them. So I've decided along with the rest of the faculty that a little competition is in order. So the slot that is available will be filled by one solo that is self choreographed. Auditions will be held in two weeks, anybody from any class is welcome to audition." The rest of the class breaks out into murmurs before the teacher tells them that they need to begin class.

The general feel she got after class ended, listening to her classmates, is that most people aren't going to try because there is no way they'd let a freshman choreograph themselves in the big concert of the semester. Brittany can't begin to understand why they wouldn't at least try. First of all, auditioning is important. It lets people see you and know you want it, and in settings like this where the faculty know them all already, it shows that they aren't complacent. She decides she's going to go for it, what's the worst that could happen? She doesn't get it, and that's not so bad since she wouldn't have gotten a part in the show anyway probably.

She arrives a few minutes early to her next class and thinks about what she might like to do for an audition piece. If she auditions in two weeks, then that only leaves three to four weeks plus tech to choreograph and perfect the piece if she gets it. So she decides she's going to choreograph her audition as well, to be a part of what she'd do for the solo at the concert. That way she's not wasting any time. Now she just needs to manage to focus through this class so that she can tell Santana. And kiss Santana. Probably kiss her first.

A few times.

When class lets out she grabs her things and bolts through the door, the hour and fifteen-minute class only furthering her excitement to see and tell Santana. She didn't honestly think she would be chosen, but she was really excited for the opportunity to prove herself outside of class. She practically runs to the dining hall to see Santana and finds that for once in, she's pretty sure ever, she beat the Latina there.

When she gets the dining hall Santana is greeted by the sight of a very bouncy very excited Brittany. She takes a moment to enjoy the smile that the blonde is wearing before alerting her to her presence. "Hey Britt" Santana watches as Brittany turns in her direction and sees her. What was already a brilliant smile has just morphed into something that would put the sun to shame. Santana thinks maybe she is the luckiest person on earth to be able to put that beautiful of a smile on that beautiful of a girl. She doesn't know if she deserves it, but she'll take it because she doesn't know what she'd do without it at this point.

Brittany bounces toward the Latina and flings her arms around her waist pulling her in tight. She buries her face in Santana's neck. "Hello baby." Brittany places several small kisses to the skin there.

"What's got you so happy B?"

"You. Then there's some other stuff. Let's go get food then I'll tell you."

After getting food, they find a place to sit down and Santana can still feel the excited energy coming off of Brittany. "Ok so tell me what's going on!"

"At dance class this morning, my professor told us that there was a slot open in the dance concert and that they were auditioning for someone to choreograph and dance a solo. And that it's open to the entire department, so I'm totally going to try! I don't think I'll get it but I'm excited to audition for them something that I've done myself. You know?" Santana nods.

"That's great B. Do you think everyone will audition? That's a ton of people."

"No." Brittany swallows the cereal in her mouth. "I know in my class a lot of people were saying they weren't going to do it because there was no way they'd pick a first year. Even if that's true I don't understand why they aren't just trying. And then I think anybody who is a principle in the other pieces would probably not want to audition but I don't know for sure. I'm not friends with anybody in the department really. But if I were dancing in a few other pieces, I would probably not want to also choreograph and dance my own solo. But who knows." Santana nods again.

"Do you know what you will audition with?"

"I think I'm just going to start choreographing the piece, and then audition with a piece of it. That way I don't lose time working on the piece if for some reason they do pick me."

"That's a good idea. I bet a lot of people will probably just use things they've done before and remember."

"You think so?"

"Yeah. I mean that's what a repertoire is for. Being able to reuse things so you can get really good at them. But it's less effective when you're auditioning with the people that have already seen all of that work. Bringing something new is a very smart idea B. You're a genius." Brittany ducked her head. Nobody makes her feel smart like Santana does.

"I'm really excited. I don't want to get my hopes up. But it's just really exciting that they're opening it up as an option."

"You have just as much of a chance of getting it as anyone else Britt. You're amazing." Brittany nearly knocked over everything on the table trying to kiss Santana. She really needed to start just sitting next to her.

"The only bad part is that between that and the talent thingy I am going to have to be practicing a lot. Which means I'll get to see you less." Yeah. Santana knew that was coming. But she also knew that, if it meant Brittany's success, she'd sacrifice time with the beautiful blonde.

"That's ok. We'll see each other when we can, and it's totally worth it." She grabs Brittany's hand. Just wanting the connection. She knows the idea of seeing the blonde a little less shouldn't stress her out but it does a little. She knows it will be fine. She should probably spend more time in the practice rooms anyway.

Truthfully, the idea of spending less time with Santana makes Brittany feel uncomfortable. She finds herself trying to think of times they can see each other before the audition, next Thursday (really less than two weeks. Great now she's nervous about that too.) and the talent show on Friday. As they leave the dining hall she makes a decision. "I'm not going to start working on this tonight, I need a little more thinking time. And I was wondering if maybe you wanted to come over tonight and watch a movie in my room? My roommate is there so you'll get to meet her. And if you want to sleep over she's ok with it." Brittany watches Santana hopefully.

"Definitely." She puts her hands into the pocket of Brittany's jacket and pulls her closer, placing a soft kiss to her cheek. She would never say no to any reason to sleep with Brittany.

"We can't like, do anything. Because she'll be there. Is that ok?" Santana looks up into Brittany's eyes and sees a hint of nervousness there. She kisses her again.

"Of course. Do I get to hold you?" Brittany bites her lip, smiling, and nods. "And maybe a good night kiss or two?"

"Or ten."

"That's all I want Britt. You do know this isn't about sex right?" Brittany nods. Trying to force herself to remember that she means more to Santana than what she can give her with her body. "Ok. Go to class. Text me after and let me know what time you want me to come over." Santana kisses her several times before parting because they are both dangerously close to being late for class.

After class Brittany goes to the library for a few hours to work on some homework. She knows that balancing Santana, homework, and dancing is going to be difficult. She's always known that. When she started school she had never intended to get into a relationship. Not that she regrets Santana at all, she just knows she's going to have to work out a way to balance it all. But tonight, it's Santana. So she texts her and asks her to meet her for dinner before they go to her room.

When they get to the dorm after dinner, Brittany signs Santana in and they head up to her room. "So this is my room." She says as they enter. Santana can immediately tell which half is Brittany's. Her half isn't as neat, and there is various dance attire hanging off of everything. The hoodie that she gave her was lying on the bed next to her pillow. She kind of hoped that Brittany wore it to bed. The idea made her smile. Before Santana could even respond, another person walked in.

"Oh you must be Santana! Brittany has told me all about you. My name is Rachel Barbara Berry. But she's probably already told you about me too."

"Jesus you are small as shit." There was a brief awkward silence.

"Yes. I suppose that is true." Rachel replies just as Brittany starts laughing and hugs Santana from behind.

"She's not that much smaller than you, you know. Be nice San." She kisses the area between her ear and jaw. Santana smiles and presses herself back further. Knowing that there is no way they'll ever be close enough. "Do you guys want to watch a movie?" They both nod. "Ok which movie?"

"Funny Girl!" Rachel exclaims excitedly.

"Oh my God please Brittany no. I can't watch that movie. Don't let her make me." Brittany laughs.

"Maybe a different one Rachel." Rachel pouts. This isn't going exactly the way Brittany had hoped it might. "What about Tangled?"

"I've never seen that before. What is it about?"

"Rapunzel, sort of." Brittany looks to Santana. Truthfully it didn't matter to Santana, she'd agree to anything Brittany suggested. Even Funny Girl. Maybe. If Britt had said it first.

"Sure B. Whatever you want." Rachel watched the two. Santana clearly more at ease when she could touch Brittany. She thought it was sweet, even though Santana herself seemed a little scary.

Brittany got Tangled out from under her bed and handed it to Rachel. "I have to go to the bathroom. Be right back." She left the room. For a few seconds it was silent. Santana didn't mind silence. Rachel, however, wasn't great with it.

"So Brittany told me you were a vocal major in the music department." Rachel stated hoping to find some common ground right away.

"Mmm. Vocal and Piano. You are in the MT department right?"

"I am. I would like to extend a helping hand any time you might need assistance. I have perfect pitch and have managed to, often times unwillingly on their part, help many people from my high school-"

"Shut it down Berry. I'm good in the vocals department. Thanks anyway though." It wasn't like Santana was insecure about her voice. She just already dealt with people in the music department trying to mold her into what they wanted her to be. And mostly she just wanted to do her own thing.

"So... you're pretty infatuated with Brittany." Rachel thought that might be a safe topic.

"Yep." Santana really wasn't making this conversation easy on Rachel.

"She's nice. Kind of weird and private sometimes. I don't know anything about her family. She doesn't even have any pictures up." Rachel knew immediately that they had broached a topic that Santana really didn't want to talk about.

The Latina's first reaction was sorrow. She imagined Brittany didn't have many pictures of her family. Probably just those fancy portraits people take for appearance sake. She wondered if her family had any pictures of her. Her second reaction was to protect Brittany. She wasn't even sure from what. But she knew she didn't like this little hobbit talking about her girlfriend's family.

"Don't talk about her family. Unless she brings it up you do not talk about them." Rachel takes a step backwards away from Santana. She was about to respond when Brittany walks back in and sees Santana staring angrily at Rachel and Rachel with her back pressed against her bed.

"Everything ok?" She asked cautiously. Santana turned and immediately softened.

"Yeah B. Fine. What about this movie?" As Brittany turned to put the DVD in since Rachel hadn't. "I'm sorry Berry. Sensitive topic. No hard feelings?" She felt bad for making Rachel nervous. It didn't seem like she and the diva were the kind of people to be friends but it was obviously important to Brittany that they meet and so she'd do her best to make things not awkward.

"Of course not Santana. Can I hug you?"

"No." She shook her head while releasing a laugh. Rachel didn't take it personally. She just made the decision that she'd get Santana to let her hug her soon.

Santana followed Brittany as she climbed up on her bed. She sat next to the blonde who immediately curled up into her side. The Latina was pretty sure this was going to be a terrible movie. But she had something that would make it worth it. A beautiful girl curled in her lap.

Santana was wrong. After trying to be annoyed by the movie for the first five minutes, she quickly got sucked in. She couldn't help it. She could tell that Brittany was tired though, and she didn't want her to fall asleep in her clothes. "Why don't you change for bed B? Then we can just lay down and finish the movie." Brittany looked up at her and nodded. She was really tired.

Santana went down to the bathroom to change and was reminded why she moved out of the dorms as soon as she could in the first place. Communal bathrooms. Nothing made her quite as nervous as sharing a bathroom with a lot of other females that didn't know about her. She was already nervous about not wearing compression shorts around Rachel, even though Brittany had convinced her that it would be fine and that Rachel rarely noticed things that didn't involve her anyway. When she gets back Rachel is just heading to the bathroom to change.

"I think your roommate is crazy babe." She tells Brittany who just starts changing right in front of her.

"Yeah. Probably. But I kind of like her." She gets no response from the Latina, turning around to figure out why she realizes that Santana can see her naked from the waist up in the mirror. She throws her t-shirt at her. "Perv."

"Can you blame me? No." She wraps her arms around Brittany's naked torso and kisses her once in the middle of the shoulder blades before taking the t shirt that had just been thrown at her and putting it on over Brittany's head. "Put your clothes on I don't want Rachel seeing this. It's all mine." She smiles and pats Brittany on the butt before jumping back onto the girl's bed. Brittany follows her quickly, knocking Santana to her back and kissing her until they hear Rachel coming back in. Santana briefly wonders how long it will take Brittany to fall asleep, and if they can maybe get their lady kisses on after the movie. Just a little.

This idea is quickly put to rest however. As soon as the movie starts, Brittany curls up into Santana's side with her head on her chest. About three minutes later, Brittany is completely passed out. After the movie Rachel gets up to turn the lights out. "Thanks for letting me stay the night Berry."

"Not a problem Santana. She seems to really like you-is she drooling on you?" Rachel manages to cut herself off. Santana looks down and sees a small drool spot forming on her t-shirt.

"Yeah I guess so."

"Aren't you grossed out?"

"No. It happens. If I want her this close, then drool it is." And she does want her that close. She thinks that if it were at all possible for her to sleep all night with Brittany sleeping completely on top of her, she'd do it. As it is, Brittany is half on top of her. It's never more apparently that Brittany is all arms and legs until she has Santana completely trapped. Which Santana doesn't mind at all. Obviously.

"If you say so. Goodnight Santana." She says as she has to jump several times to be able to make it back onto her own bed. Santana laughs and kisses Brittany on the forehead before curling into her even more and falling asleep.

"Da fuck?" Santana mumbles waking up with a start around five in the morning to a strange noise. She couldn't identify it or turn to see what it was because Brittany had her trapped in her endless limbs (she has no regrets).

"It's her routine baby just go back to bed." Brittany kisses her and pulls her tighter.

"Huh?"

"Rachel's routine. Sleep. More. Now." Brittany starts running her hand up and down Santana's back, knowing it's a soothing thing for the Latina.

"So weird." Santana mumbles as she drifts back to sleep.

The next time she wakes up it's to Brittany's alarm. Brittany rolls on top of Santana to turn it off. The Latina circles her waist and prevents her from rolling back over after shutting it off. Brittany leans down to kiss her thoroughly. "Mmmmm good morning to you." She moans into the Latina's mouth. "I don't want to get up."

"Don't." She chases Brittany's lips upwards. "Stay here."

"Don't tempt me. I have class. So do you." Santana nods into the kiss, acknowledging what Brittany said. Then she rolls them gently so that she is on top and leans down to kiss the blonde again.

"Two minutes." She slides her tongue gently against Brittany's who moans into Santana's mouth. After a few more seconds she pulls away. "Mmmm ok we do have to stop now because if we don't, then I'm not sure I'll be able to." She leans down and pecks Brittany's lips once more before pushing herself off of her. They continue to brush kisses against each other as they get ready for the day. Santana thinks that she wouldn't mind waking up like this every morning. Brittany wishes she could wake up like this every morning. And both of them are sad that neither of them know when the next time it will happen is.

Brittany manages to get a good chunk of studio time from 6:00pm till 10:00pm that night. She's grateful as she knows this won't always be the case. When she gets to the studio she locks herself in and starts doing warm ups. She's already decided that, while she feels most comfortable doing hip-hop, that that's not the direction she's going to take. She's thinking something more lyrical. So after warming up, she puts her ipod on random and starts to think about a song. She keeps skipping through until she hits one that makes her smile. She listens to it for a few seconds, thinking that it reminds her of Santana, and then moves on. After a few more minutes of skipping tracks she stops and thinks that maybe she could do the one that reminds her of Santana. She has big feelings for Santana, and that song makes her feel a lot of them. And big feelings often lead her to beautiful dancing. She's not often danced because she was happy, but the idea felt right so she figured she'd try. If nothing came of it, she'd pick a new song.

Santana knew Brittany was at the studio so she wasn't texting her. Even though she wanted to text her. She wanted to see her, and see her dance. But she knew she couldn't so she was watching trashy TV with Mercedes and Kurt instead. "'Cedes are you singing at the talent show?" Kurt asks, eyes still on the TV.

"Mhmm."

"What are you singing?"

"I don't have time to prepare anything so I'm just going with And I am Telling You. And I am telling you I'm gonna kill it." They high fived.

"What are you doing Kurt?" Santana asks. "No, let me guess. Phantom of the Opera with that damn sequence cape you have."

"How did you-I mean no. I'm going to sing Blackbird. It's one of Blaine's favorite songs. What about you Santana? You gonna sing to Miss Brittany huh?" He starts making kissing faces in her direction.

"No! Yes. I don't know. Is it…like if I sing a song about love in it does that mean she'll think I love her? Caus it's too soon for all that." Mercedes looks at Kurt with a raised eyebrow clearly saying 'who does she think she's fooling?'. But they both stayed silent. Santana works through things on Santana's time. They know that. And neither wants to bring out any of her bitchiness. She's been kind of pleasant lately.

"Don't over think it San. You don't have to tell her it's to her, it could just kind of be assumed. Or you could do something else." Santana slumped down into the couch. She just doesn't want to do anything to scare Brittany away.

By Saturday morning Santana is pretty sure she's going through Brittany withdrawal. She misses her so bad. She misses being alone with her. She misses her body pressed against hers. She misses everything. The thing that makes missing Brittany worse is she thinks that Brittany is seriously over working. The only time she's seen Brittany is for lunches, where Brittany eats and does homework with Santana's help. And Thursday night for three hours because Brittany was so behind on homework that she panicked and left the studio to go to the library. She knows that this is how things will be. That it will always be hard for Brittany to make time for her between dance and homework. And truthfully, this is a really easy semester for her but usually she doesn't have this much down time. So she needs to get used to Brittany not being there whenever she wants.

Brittany leaves the studio at 8:00pm and goes back to her room. She's happy with the progress she's made but not very happy with what's happening with the rest of her life. She's behind in homework, she isn't sleeping very much, and she hasn't eaten more than lunch every day since Monday. Not to mention she has barely seen Santana. And not only has she not seen her, but she hasn't really talked to her either. She's scheduled herself to be at the Library from now until she gets her homework done. When she gets back to the room to change she finds Rachel there watching a movie that she doesn't recognize. She waves vaguely in Rachel's direction before setting her stuff down and collapsing on her bed. She just needs a second.

Just before she starts to talk herself into getting up she feels her leg start to cramp up. She knows she's not drinking enough water, or eating enough. But she forgets because there are just so many other things to think about. She reaches down and puts her hands around her calf squeezing hoping to make the pain stop. And then, despite her best efforts not to, she just starts crying. She tries not to make it to obvious, but between the pain and her frustration and just sheer exhaustion her sobs reach Rachel across the room.

Rachel pauses her movie and quickly runs over to Brittany. "What's wrong Brittany? Are you ok? What's going on? Can I help you?" Brittany just shakes her head back and forth and continues squeezing her cramped calf muscle. "Are you hurt do you need to go to the doctors? Do you need ice? I can try to wrap it? Do you want me to sing to you?"

"N-no I'm fine" She starts crying again. "I just. I'm hungry and tired and stupid and I m-miss S-Santana." Rachel sighs. She knows how busy Brittany has been, she knows why it's so important. She's even got to see the progress she's made so far and she was genuinely pleasantly surprised by Brittany's talent. She also thinks that maybe Brittany is over doing it. And that's saying something coming from her.

"I think you need a night off." Brittany starts to nod her head no. "If I had someone that important to me I'd want a night with them especially if I was feeling as uncomfortable as you are."

"She probably has plans."

"Call her?" Rachel sees Brittany's phone on the desk and picks it up, going through her recent contacts she see's Santana's name, hits call and puts it on speaker phone just in case she needs to step in to make Santana not be busy tonight. She can be very persuasive.

Brittany takes the phone and sniffs back a few tears. Rachel rubs her back as they wait for Santana to pick up the phone.

"Hey B what's up? On your way to the library? I can come if you need help." Truthfully Santana just wanted to see her, even if helping her with homework was the only way.

"S-Santana? Can I stay with you tonight." Brittany tries to make it sound like she's not crying, she fails.

"Brittany what's wrong? Are you ok?" Santana's tone turns slightly frantic.

"Yeah. Just tired. I need you." Santana's heart melts a little at those words. She's already walking to the door.

"I will be there in two minutes B. Can you walk down or do you want me to come up?"

"I'll come down. See you soon." They both hang up and Rachel knows she's done a good thing for her friend. She hopes that Brittany thinks of her as a friend.

"Ok let's get you some pajamas ok?" Brittany nods wiping her eyes. Rachel helps her off of her bed and Brittany takes over from there throwing some things in her bag and grabbing her Lopez hoodie. It doesn't smell like Santana at all any more. She wonders if the Latina will trade her for a new one.

"I'm going to walk you down and keep you company in case she's not here yet. Is that ok?" Rachel asks as she opens the door and starts to head out before she even receives an answer. Which Brittany never gives. Rachel is pretty sure that Santana will be there. She probably broke all kinds of rules in order to get here as fast as she could. Santana loves Brittany like that. She really just wants to walk her down because Brittany feels dead on her feet. And she is honestly worried that the girl might fall over or pass out on her way down the stairs.

When she leads Brittany out of the front door she immediately sees Santana sitting in a car. She watches as Santana sees them and then a confused look flash over her face before quickly getting out of the car. She runs over to them and quickly pulls Brittany into her arms who is still sniffling slightly. Brittany's head immediately falls to Santana's shoulder. "Is everything ok?" She asks worried. Brittany just nods her head. Santana isn't totally convinced. She takes her bag from Rachel. "Thanks Rachel." She says. Brittany pulls herself sluggishly away from Santana and turns to her roommate.

"Yeah Rachel. Thank you for calling. You're a good friend." Rachel's face lights up at the word.

"Can I hug you?" Brittany smiles and opens her arms and Rachel hugs her. She then gently pushes Brittany back towards Santana. "I hope your night gets better Brittany. Get some rest." And then turns around and heads back inside.

Santana helps Brittany into the car and throws her bag in the back seat and drives back to her apartment in general silence. Brittany is still a little bit teary eyed and Santana is trying not to let her fear and protective instincts escalate to an unnecessary level. Once they get back to the apartment they go inside, Brittany leaning on Santana heavily the whole way. Once they get back into her room Brittany sits down on the bed, Santana goes and kneels in front of her pushing the hair out of her face. "Please tell me what's wrong B. Did something happen?"

"No." She sniffs. "I am just so tired Santana. And I missed you so bad. I just needed to be around you." Santana continues to brush Brittany's hair out of her face, mostly just for an excuse to keep touching.

"Ok. You're here now. I missed you too." She leans up and kisses her lips, barely letting them touch at all.

"Can I trade you hoodies?" Santana quirks her eyebrow up, confused. "This one doesn't smell like you any more and I miss it." Santana smiles. That's the best reason ever to trade hoodies.

"You can have this one I'm wearing. Put your arms up." Brittany does and Santana goes to pull her hoodie off of the tired blonde, accidentally pulling her tank top off with it. She looks down and hopes she's wrong but is pretty sure that Brittany has lost a visible amount of weight. She knows she's been working hard but the blonde was already thin, she didn't think she could afford to lose any. "When is the last time you ate B?"

Brittany thinks about it. "Lunch? I had cereal. I was late for tutoring."

"Why don't you shower and I'll make us something really quick for dinner? Do you need to borrow pjs?" Brittany nods her head no, that she brought some. Santana helps her up, gives her a kiss, and then sends her to the bathroom. She heads to the kitchen trying to think of what she could make for Brittany. She didn't have much in the way of food. Neither did Quinn. They really needed to go grocery shopping. She opens up the pantry and finds some chicken rice stuff. She pulls it out knowing that she definitely has some chicken too. She goes to work, listening for Brittany to get out of the shower.

Brittany comes wondering in wearing her hoodie and what she's pretty sure are technically underwear but the overwhelming need to take care of the blonde right now wins out over desire. Although she's glad she jerked off today because, well, that ass. Brittany looks a lot better now that she has had a shower. "Can I have a banana?" She asks snapping Santana out of her thoughts. "My leg cramped up really bad in my room earlier, which is what led to the cry fest. I think I need potassium and water."

"Anything you want." She turns to the fridge and grabs two bottles of water. "Here's some water."

"I hope I didn't mess up plans you had for tonight or anything." Brittany says through a mouth full of banana. She didn't realize quite how hungry or thirsty she was. Or how embarrassed.

"Britt. You need me, I'm there. No matter what. Ok? And for the record, all I wanted to do tonight was see you so, everything is working out in my favor anyway. Tell me why you were so upset. What happened."

"Honestly what I already told you. I missed you and was tired but I knew I had to go to the library and I stopped in my room to get my books and I laid down for one second and my leg started cramping. I haven't been drinking enough. Or eating enough I don't think." Santana looks up, Brittany looks kind of embarrassed.

"Well, dinner is almost done. But B, you gotta work on that. Just because you're busy doesn't mean you can stop taking care of yourself ok. Promise you'll try and not let that happen again ok? Bodies don't work right if you don't give them enough food and water. It probably was making you even more tired."

"I promise." Santana goes to reach for the bottle of water that she set out for herself and notices that Brittany has already made it through hers, and halfway through Santana's as well. Brittany smiles sheepishly at her and mouths the word thirsty before taking another drink.

Santana goes back to finishing dinner, while periodically checking on Brittany who is just sitting at the counter with her head down watching her and smiling gently. "What?" Santana wonders why Brittany is watching her.

"I'm just lucky. That's all." Santana blows her a kiss as she reaches for plates and dishes out the chicken rice. "Oh my god this is so good." Brittany moans before taking another huge bite.

"Uh. Thanks? I think. It's just stuff from a box. I didn't really do anything. I need to cook for you for real sometime soon. Maybe Christmas break I'll make you a whole dinner with dessert and everything." Brittany nods still chewing her rice. While the blonde definitely looks better, Santana can tell just how tired she is. "Movie in bed tonight?"

"Yes please. Nothing scary." Santana goes into the living room and picks out something she's sure Brittany would approve of even though she's pretty sure the girl is going to be fast asleep as soon as she gets comfortable. When Brittany finishes they head into the bedroom. Santana does bother leaving the room this time when she changes. Brittany watches Santana remove her bra and stairs openly at her naked chest. "I'm mad that I'm so tired." She practically growls to herself.

"What babe?" Santana turns slipping a tank top over her head.

"I'm just mad that I'm tired. I hate that I literally have no energy in my body. Everything hurts. My abs are killing me. But all I want is to touch you. I want to do things we did last weekend. And I'm sad that I am to tired. And I feel like a terrible girlfriend." Satana takes her hand and pulls her till she's standing.

"You are the most amazing girlfriend in the entire world. You are the only one I ever want. I understand that you're tired. I would love to also touch you but more than that I would love to know that when you go off to the dance studio tomorrow that I did everything I could to make sure you were well rested and feeling better than you did today. Ok? That's what I want. You're busy. I promise there will be times that I'm to busy and we won't have time because of me. That's just how it works when we're both in school. It's no big deal. Now take off the hoodie and get in bed. I wants to get my cuddle on." Brittany kisses her on her full lips and mumbles thank you against them. Santana pulls away and slips the DVD into her computer. The opening screen pops up.

"Finding Nemo? I love this movie!"

"I had a feeling." Santana replies as she turns around noticing that Brittany is now in bed wearing nothing but underwear and a sports bra. Once again the blondes tired eyes however, bring Santana's thoughts back to something more innocent. She shuts the lights off and climbs in behind the blonde and wraps her arm around her waist. She starts lightly stroking Brittany's abs remember that she had said they were sore. "Do you want me to rub your back baby?" No answer. Brittany fell asleep in less than five minutes. Santana buries her nose in the blondes hair and pulls her body in as close as she can. Relishing in the fact that the Brittany is back where she belongs.

After a quick breakfast and a very very brief make out session Brittany left for the dance studio. Santana had, of course, been right. After having eaten a few meals and slept ten hours last night rehearsal was much less terrible this afternoon. After running through her talent show number a few times (she was pretty unconcerned about that) she decides to cut rehearsal short and get in some extra time at the library before going to bed at a decent hour. After dinner. Food. Must eat food Brittany. She thinks Santana would be proud.

As she's rounding the corner towards the door she runs right into someone. "I'm sorry!" She looks up, apologizing to the tall boy she'd just run into. "I should watch where I'm walking."

"Me too. I'm always running into things. My name is Mike Chang. I've seen you around a few times. Are you a new major?"

"Yep. First year. Brittany Pierce."

"Cool. What are you up to hear on a Sunday?"

"Rehearsing my audition piece for the solo for the winter show." She feels a little embarrassed to be talking to another dancer about it, she's not totally sure why. "I know I probably won't get it but I think it's important to try. So I am. Are you auditioning for it?"

"No. My girlfriend said she's hit me if I got in another piece and had to spend more time in this building. She is in the theater department. Costumes. She's pretty awesome. Her name is Tina." Brittany liked the way Mike's face lit up when he talked about Tina. She knew her face lit up when she talked about Santana too. "And don't think you won't get it. You've got just as much of a shot as anyone else here. And the professors are pretty good about not showing favoritism."

"You think? It would be nice to establish myself early."

"Definitely. That's a really good way to think about it Brittany. Hey, I've got to go to rehearsal but let me give you my number, and if you'd like I could maybe take a look at your audition piece before Thursday." He writes down his number and hands it to her. "Just text me your number on your way out."

"Really? Thanks Mike! Have a good rehearsal." He weaves at her as he walks away. He seems really nice, Brittany thinks. She desperately wants friends in the department. She is incredibly glad to be friends with Santana's friends but she wants to fit in here too. She texts him her number and a smiley face and heads to the library to try and make her way through a mountain of homework.

The beginning of the week happens much like last week, where Santana only sees Brittany for lunch. But she's careful about asking her if she's eating and she can tell Brittany is sleeping more. "So I made a friend on Sunday" Brittany tells her at lunch on Tuesday. "He's a sophomore and his name is Mike." Santana tries to not be curious about Mike's intentions with her girlfriend. Brittany can tell what Santana is thinking and looks at her with an amused expression. "And he has a girlfriend in the theater department." She watches Santana let go of the little bit of jealousy she'd been holding.

"Yeah? I should ask Kurt if he knows her. What's her name?"

"Tina."

"Oh yeah he does know her. She helped me make a sequence cape. I might never forgive her for that hideous thing that gets dragged out every time he's drunk." Brittany laughs.

"Well, he's going to watch my audition piece tonight and give me feed back."

"That's great B. Can I watch?" She slips it in there hoping that Brittany will just agree without thinking about it. They'd discussed this several times. Santana really wanted to see what Brittany had been working on, and Brittany wanted to wait to show Santana. If she didn't get the solo, she'd show her next time they had time. If she got the solo, then she'd see it at the winter dance concert. While Santana had accepted these terms, she still tried to trick Brittany once in a while.

"Nice try." The blonde winks at her. When they part ways after lunch Brittany heads to class and Santana heads to a practice room at the music building. She spends the rest of the afternoon working on both songs that she's picked because she still can't just be brave and sing the song she wants to sing to Brittany.

Thursday rolls around and Brittany is a giant bundle of nerves. Santana meets her at the dance building before her assigned audition time to wish her good luck. When Brittany gets inside, the professors all smile at her and tell her to begin. She pushes play and begins to dance the part that she's choreographed so far. After one minute, she stops dancing, the music is shut off, and she says "Thank you." To the professors.

"Thank you Brittany. Now, I know this is your first year. Is that something you did before you came here?"

"No sir. I've been working on it since the day we were told that we could audition for a solo for the winter dance. It's part of the entire piece I would do if you chose me."

"So you've already started choreographing the piece that you don't know you've gotten yet?" Brittany gets nervous. Maybe he thought she was being cocky.

"Ye-Yes sir. I just didn't want to waste any time if I was lucky enough to be chosen. That's all."

"Nice work Brittany. We'll be posting the results on the window at 5:00pm tomorrow. Thank you for auditioning."

And that was it. She walked back out and found Santana sitting on some stairs halfway down the hall.

"All done? That was really short. Did it go ok?"

"I think so? I'll know tomorrow at 5:00, they're posting the results. Oh I won't know till after the talent show actually because we'll already be there by then."

"I can have someone go check for you if you want. Or Rachel would do it I'm sure."

"No. I want to look. I'll wait. Will you go with me to look though?"

"Of course Britt. I was kind of hoping you might want to stay the night tomorrow night anyway. Take Saturday off maybe? Spend some time together." Brittany kisses Santana sweetly.

"Yes. I want that definitely. But in the meantime, I have to spend the rest of the day at the library. I am so behind."

"Ok. I can come with you for now, then I'm going to rehearse with Mercedes and then I can come back."

"Perfect." Brittany texts Mike to let him know that things went pretty well, and to tell him about the talent show in case he and Tina wanted to come.

By 11:00pm Brittany is feeling significantly less behind thanks to Santana (as always) and they decide to call it a night. Tomorrow is going to be a long day anyway.

Mercedes asked them all to meet at the student union at 4:30 the next day so they could make sure everything was ready for the start of the show at 6:00. Brittany found herself getting really excited as she walked down to meet everybody there. She hadn't really done much thinking about it, but the number she was doing wasn't particularly difficult, she had run through it a few times this morning and it went fine. She was excited to get to sing and dance. She didn't sing for people very often, and while she knew she'd never make a career of singing that didn't change the fact that it was fun for her.

When she got there she immediately found Santana and stood behind her with her arms draped over the shorter girls shoulders. "Ok guys we need to come up with an order." Mercedes said to the people performing. "I think we'll have the drag queens to a couple numbers first and then which one of you wants to do your number first?" Nobody spoke up. Brittany wondered why. "Please guys don't make me force you."

"I'll do it." Brittan shot her hand up. She wasn't nervous she wasn't totally concerned with the outcome of the show anyway.

"Thank you Brittany you're an angel." Santana nods as though affirming Mercedes statement and then turns around to kiss her girlfriend on the cheek. After the rest of the order was worked out the all parted ways to eat dinner and make sure the DJ had their music. There were a couple people there that she didn't recognize, some of Sam's friends she assumed as they were talking to him. Then the drag queens showed up. Brittany had the brief thought that she wished she could be a boy just so she could be like them. They were the most fabulous people Brittany had ever seen. Kurt seemed pretty enamored with them as well.

At 6:00pm Brittany looked out into the audience and saw that it was a pretty packed house. Big crowds were always better crowds she thought. She looked over in the corner and saw Santana clutching her cup of tea pacing a little.

"Nervous baby?" She asked, accidently scaring the Latina. Truthfully, Santana was nervous. But more than she was nervous, she still hadn't completely decided on a song.

"Yeah a little. I always am before singing in front of a crowd. Nothing to bad though. It usually goes away as soon as I'm on stage."

"Well I can't wait to watch you. And I gotta go change. See you after I'm done!" She knew she only had about twenty minutes to get changed but that was plenty. Her costume wasn't elaborate. Just a torn up t-shirt and some black bootie shorts and heels. Then she messed up her hair, threw on some glitter (or lets of glitter) and was ready to go. She went to Stage left and the technician clipped the mic pack onto her as she fit the headset onto her head.

Santana stood in position in the audience just off to the side so she had a good view of the stage. When the music started she didn't immediately recognize it until she saw Brittany walk on stage and heard her start to sing Ke$sha's Tik Tok. She watched wide eyed as Brittany popped her bodies in ways that Santana had only ever see on dance shows on TV. She was completely captivated by her girlfriend's moves as she watched her dip lower and even go into a split. She had never been more thankful for her compression shorts in this moment which felt incredibly tight. After her number everyone in the audience cheered but non louder than Santana who quickly ran back stage and jumped onto Brittany pressing their lips together forcefully.

"So you liked?" Brittany asked as she supported the Latina's weight against her body. She could hear vaguely in the background (though she wasn't really paying attention) the drag queens praising her moves. Eventually the girls separated after getting several looks from other people back stage.

"You did awesome. God you're sexy. Did you have fun?"

"Tons. I'm excited to see you now." Mercedes was nailing it out on stage at the moment.

"Oh shit I've got to get dressed. I. well. see. you. in a. little. bit." Each word punctuated with a kiss. After Mercedes comes off and Sam congratulates her she runs off in another direction making sure one of the drag queens wasn't doing shots in the bathroom again.

"You did awesome Britt!" Sam ruffles her already messy hair. "This is my friend Artie. We're doing Stereo Hearts. We're on next." Brittany waves at Artie.

"Excellent I think you guys will be great. I love that song." They exchange more small talk until the drag queens next number ends and the boys get ready to head out onto the stage. Brittany starts to look around for Santana thinking she'd be back soon.

"Wow. You are…You're really hot." She hears a distinctly male voice say in her direction. She turns around and notices one of the guys that was talking to Sam standing there.

"Thanks." She replies.

"I'm Finn. Finn Hudson. And you are…?" She doesn't like the way he's looking at her. She starts to back up away from him.

"Brittany. Are you friends with Sam? He's like my brother." She hopes saying this will get him to stop advancing on her but it doesn't, and to soon she finds her back pressed against the wall and he's still coming towards her.

"You and I should head out. Maybe go back to my place." He puts one hand against the wall over her shoulder and one on her waist. His big hand feels so uncomfortable compared to the small feminine hands she was used to.

"I-I-I have a girlfriend."

"Maybe you just need a real man to show you what you're missing." He presses his pelvis into hers and tears spring to her eyes. She puts her hand against his chest and pushes trying to get him to move away.

"Please stop. Please leave me alone." Tears are running down her cheeks now as he presses himself closer to her.

Sam gets off stage and high fives Artie. Or is it a low five really? Dude's in a wheel chair. Either way. He thinks they did awesome. He looks around for Mercedes but doesn't see her. He looks towards the back wall where he thinks he sees someone. As soon as he focuses in he notices that Finn, some guy in the theater department that just kind of invited himself to this thing, is pressed up against Brittany who is clearly upset and pushing him away. He runs back towards her and grabs him by the back of his shirt and pulls him away from her.

Brittany shuts her eyes tight against what is happening right now. It feels too familiar. She wants it to stop. She's scared and she thinks she's going to be sick when suddenly the oversized man is gone. She opens her eyes and sees Sam step in between them and press her back into the wall. But unlike the scared feeling she had with Finn, now she feels like this is going to be ok. She buries her fists in the back of his shirt to make sure he stays in front of her as she tries to get her tears to stop.

"Man if her girlfriend catches your dumb ass she will kill you. Get the fuck out of here right now and I don't want to ever see you around here again."

"What the hell man she's just a girl I wasn't doing anything wron-" before he could even finish his statement Sam punched him in the jaw.

"Get the fuck out of here now." Finn started to walk away and Sam turned around and hugged Brittany. "Are you ok Britt? What did he do? I will kill him." Brittany was gearing up to explain what had happened when she heard Santana walking towards them.

"What the fuck trouty all up on my woman?" She said in a joking tone. He didn't threaten her. He was like a brother to both of them. The joking ended when she saw the look on Brittany's face coupled with the tear tracks that were made visible by her mascara. "Brittany what happened? Sam tell me what happened." Sam looked nervous to explain and Brittany was shaking. Santana needed an explanation now.

"He's gone now Santana so it's ok." Artie stepped in to try and explain.

"Who's gone? What did they do? Brittany what happened?" Santana was in full on freak out mode now.

"This guy Finn got really handsy with Brittany and didn't stop when she told him no. I got rid of him though." Santana grabbed Brittany and pulled her into her tightly. Then pulled back to look at the blondes face, before pulling her in tighter.

"Britt baby are you ok? Please talk to me. Did he hurt you?"

Brittany shook her head. Feeling herself calm slightly in Santana's presence.

"Sam watch her. I'm going to go kill that fucker." She turned to walk away, not knowing who she was looking for her what direction she was going but it didn't matter because Brittany wasn't letting her go.

"No Santana. Please stay with me. He's gone. Sam busted his jaw. I'm ok. I was just scared. I just, you know." Santana nodded. She did know. "Please don't go. I need you and I want to hear you sing." Santana nodded and then hugged her girlfriend to her body again needing to feel her there as much as Brittany needed to be there.

"I just want to protect you. I'm so sorry I wasn't there Brittany. So so sorry."

"It's ok San. I should have pushed harder, or kicked him or something. I just panicked but Sam was there." Santana could tell Brittany was downplaying the entire thing. And she couldn't stop her brain from wondering what if Sam hadn't been there. Would she have got back in time? Would he have touched her? She can't let herself think of those things because Sam was there. She decides to try and let it go, harboring anger isn't going to help right now. But if she ever sees that fucker again she doesn't know what she will do.

"Ok. I'm here. We're good. Right?" Brittany leans back and wipes a stray tear off of her face and nods at Santana, a small smile playing on her lips. She leans in and kisses Santana. After a few seconds of kissing Santana hears and 'ehem'. She pulls away from Brittany, keeping their bodies pressed together and looks in the direction of the noise. "What?" She says to Mercedes.

"You're on in a minute. Everything ok?" Santana and Brittany walk away while Sam explains what happened.

Santana pulled Brittany into her one last time and kissed her deeply. "Gonna sing for me?" Brittany whispered against her lips.

"I'll do everything for you." She kissed her once more and turned to walk onto the stage at the announcement of her name.

"OH look at this sassy little girl. I like her. She was just off stage necking with her girlfriend. Gasp. Scandal." The drag queen spoke to the crowd, who all laughed. Santana just winked at her and sat down at the Piano that was on stage but off to the side. "So says here you're going to sing a little Adele Hometown Glory for us."

"Change of plans. That beautiful blonde I was "necking with" really who says that? Anyway, that's my girlfriend, and this is for her." Santana had made a decision walking across the stage that she was going to sing to Brittany. She knew she didn't need to be honest, her feelings were honest and Brittany would accept them. "So this is Make You Feel My Love by Adele." Santana said into the microphone as she started to play the familiar tune.

Brittany felt her chest swell with feelings. She wasn't expecting Santana to sing to her, clearly neither was Santana. But her voice was beautiful. It filled the entire room and nobody spoke or even breathed to loud because they were so focused on listening. She looks beautiful, she sounds beautiful, Brittany thinks. She knows she's lucky to have her, but in moments like these she has to remind herself that Santana chose her, which means she must be worth it. Because she doesn't feel like she deserves everything amazing that Santana is.

After Santana stopped singing and the applause started to die down the drag queen walked back out on stage. "Wow. Well, your girlfriend now has a roomful of competition because I think we all might be in love with you now."

"No. No one can compete with her." Santana was watching Brittany just off stage bouncing waiting for Santana to come to her. The Latina thought if she stayed on stage that Brittany might just run on. So Santana waved, and walked off stage only to be practically tackled by her very excited girlfriend.

"I can't even" she pressed their lips together desperately. "You are amazing. Beautiful. Wonderful. You're everything Santana. Just everything." And then they were kissing again. Like last time, she heard an "ehem."

"Bitch you really need to stop interrupting my sweet lady kisses lest you feel my wrath."

Mercedes raised an eyebrow and cocked her hip to the side. "Whatever. After these last two drag numbers they will announce the winners so don't go locking yourselves in the bathroom or something like that." She walks off without waiting for a response and Brittany just laughs.

When the drag queens were done performing and the judges were done counting up scores they called everybody out on stage. "So we have a three-way tie."

The drag queen standing behind Sam slaps his butt and yells "I wanna have a three way tie with you. Mhmm."

"Girl I heard that." The drag queen with the microphone responds. "Anyway, no matter how hard I tried to persuade them to pick a first second and third so we could get some drama, they said they couldn't do it. So. Without further ado. Your winners each receiving fifty dollar gift certificates to the local coffee shop The Fix, as well as 125$ in cash. Sam and Artie with Stereo Hearts." The boys walk up and hug the drag queen and take their prize, Sam gets his ass grabbed again. Mercedes thinks it's hysterical. "Santana Lopez singing Adele's Make You Feel My Love." Brittany started jumping up and down and clapping for Santana. How exciting! She almost missed the final announcement. "And Brittany Pierce, one of the finest damn dancers I've ever seen, singing and dancing to Ke$sha's Tik Tok " Brittany was still celebrating for Santana and was slightly confused when she felt Quinn push her forward. But then she heard the last part of the announcement and walked up to the drag queen. "Before I give this to you, give us one more split." Brittany shrugged and dropped down into a split without even thinking about it, and then bounced back up. The drag queen looked around her at Santana "Damn girl you better hold on to her." Brittany was so excited about everything that she ran back towards Santana and threw her arms around her neck and kissed her in front of everyone. Santana was glad she did.

"Ok after everyone leaves we gotta clean up. Everybody has to stay." Mercedes said as they walked back stage. Brittany had forgot that she still needed to find out who had gotten the solo but decided that a few more minutes wouldn't hurt. Even though she really wanted to go see. Santana saw her face fall a little bit and was also reminded that they needed to check the postings. As much as she hated asking for favors, Brittany was worth it every time.

"Hey Wheezy. Do you think it's possible that Brittany and I leave? She needs to go check and see if she got this dance solo. It's kind of a big deal and I promise I'll make it up to you." Mercedes face softened. She knew the only reason Santana approached her in a mostly respectful way was because she wanted it for Brittany. It's not that Santana was ever really mean. Not to her anyway. She was just not a very genuine person. She hid everything. But now it's like honestly oozes out of her and Mercedes loves this version of Santana. Even though she'll never tell her.

"Yeah go for it. Text us and let us know how it goes."

"Thanks 'Cedes. I will. Brittany doesn't seem too hopeful though. But we'll see!" Santana turned around without a goodbye and grabbed Brittany's hand and dragged her outside.

"Where are we going we have to clean up!" Brittany giggled as she was pulled out into the night.

"No we don't. We have to go check your list. And then we have to go spend some real time together." She knew Brittany's next question before she even asked it. "Don't worry I asked and Mercedes said it was fine." A smile breaks out over the blondes face and she starts to walk quickly to the car. They're both in heels and the last thing either of them needs is a broken ankle. Santana pulls up in front of the dance building and they can both see a white piece of paper taped to the inside of the window facing out. Brittany bites her lip and looks apprehensive.

"What's going on B?"

"Can I tell you something?"

"Anything."

"I know that I shouldn't have got my hopes up but I did. On accident. And it will be ok if I don't get it, which is likely. I just really want it." She looks down feeling a little bit bashful.

"They'd be stupid not to pick you. Now that I've seen you dance for real and all. I know that was a different kind of dance you did tonight but I've never seen someone so in control of your body. It does exactly what you want it to and looks so amazingly beautiful and sexy."

"Sexy? I'm not sexy San. I wear bear hats and shirts with dinosaurs on them."

"Brittany I can't even begin to explain how sexy I think you are. But that is for another time. Maybe in a few hours. But right now, we've got to go look at that list. Come on, I'll go with you." They get out of the car and walk down to the front of the building. Brittany can't make herself look, she's too nervous. Santana doesn't have that problem though. She reads it instantly and then looks over to Brittany. "Just look baby. Get it over with. And then we can go back to my place and do whatever you want."

Brittany takes a deep breath and looks at the sheet. "Me. San that's me. That's my name! I got it! San I did it!"

"You did it! My amazing amazing beautiful talented girlfriend! Look what you did!"

"I did it!" Brittany throws her arms around Santana's neck and squeezes her. "I can't believe I did it! I can't wait to tell everyone."

"You don't have to wait B it's not that late, call everyone now."

"Nuh uh. Right now is us time. I need some us time to let it process." Santana doesn't know that she's ever smiled bigger than she is right now. Her body feels to full of pride and love, she's worried she might explode. They get back into the car, Brittany still muttering about not being able to believe that she did it. Santana can believe it. She thinks Brittany can do anything.

When they get back to the house it's clear that Quinn hasn't come back yet. "We were so excited to get back we forgot to stop and grab clothes and stuff for me."

"You can borrow mine. Perks of being nearly the same size as your girlfriend. We should shower."

"We should." Desire filled Brittany at the thought of a naked Santana in the shower. This time in a completely different context than her being sick.

"You want to go first or me?" Santana replies pulling a few things out of her dressers.

"Could we maybe shower together?" Santana was hit with an instant shot of arousal.

"Like together together? Or like last time together?"

"Together together." Santana nods but finds the words are stuck in her throat so she just takes Brittany's hand and leads her to the bathroom, grabbing two towels on her way. When they get into the bathroom Santana starts the water, feeling for the best temperature. Brittany strips down to her underwear but then finds she's getting impatient and reaches up to the zipper on Santana's dress and slides it down. The Latina stands up straight and turns around to face Brittany. Her breath catches in her throat when she sees that Brittany is standing in front of her in black lace bra and matching panties. "I want to see you." The blonde says quietly as she reaches up to slide the straps of the dress off of the Latina's shoulders.

Santana steps out of the dress and finds herself feeling slightly embarrassed about standing in front of Brittany in her compression underwear. They aren't sexy, and she hates the lines they leave all over her. Brittany, for her part, just reaches around to the back of the her, and runs her hands up from the small of her back to her bra and unhooks it, letting it also fall off of Santana's shoulders. She sucks in a breath as she feels her knees buckle at the beauty of the sight in front of her. She reaches to Santana's hips next, resting her hands there for a brief moment before she starts to pull Santana's compression shorts off. They are incredibly tight and she nearly struggles with them before she gets them to a place where they fall to her ankles. Brittany runs her fingers over the painful looking red lines that also happen to be very close to Santana's cock.

The Latina reaches behind Brittany's back and undoes her bra as Brittany pushes her own panties off eager to get into the shower. Santana takes a moment to glace over Brittany. Not understand how something so beautiful can even exist before she pulls the blonde in and kisses her senseless. They part eventually needed oxygen and Brittany pants, "lets get in."

When they do, something about the shower and the bright lights makes them both feel exposed so they start to slow down. They help each other wash their hair and rinse it. And then Brittany uses the body wash and starts to "clean" Santana's breasts paying special attention to her nipples. The Latina moans into the echoey bathroom, heightening Brittany's arousal. She's not sure what's gotten into her but all she wants is to make Santana feel good. She reaches down with one hand and grabs her semi erect dick and squeezes it gently a few times causing Santana's hips to buck, "Unh Britt" Santana moans. But Brittany wants more. So before either she or Santana can really comprehend what's happening, Brittany is on her knees in front of Santana looking up at her, hand still gently squeezing her. When she had eye contact with the Latina she bent forward and took the still semi soft head between her lips and started to suck gently.

It wasn't long before Santana was completely hard and Brittany started to swallow more of her. She looked up reestablishing eye contact as often as possible. Santana's knew she wasn't going to last long. The visual in front of her is one she'll never forget. Brittany on her knees, mouth bobbing up and down on her cock, hand jerking the base. All the while water runs down her body. "Oh God Brittany." She reaches down and holds onto her other hand that was resting on a tan thigh.

Brittany loves this. She loves making Santana feel this way. She loves the way it makes her feel. If both of her hands weren't presently occupied she would have considered touching herself. She could feel that pressure growing inside of her again only this time she wasn't afraid of it. She wanted it. She swirled her tongue around the head of Santana's dick, flicking her slit repeatedly with her tongue. Santana felt her knees nearly give out and knew would be coming soon. One last look from Brittany, her lips perfectly sealed around her cock, her blue eyes darkened with lust, and that was all it took. It happened sooner than Santana anticipated because she would have warned Brittany. But the blonde swallowed her cum, going back to gentle sucks and licks to the head to work her through the orgasm.

After she was done she pulled Brittany to her feet and pressed her against the wall kissing her deeply. "God the things you do to me. Watching you dance. I wanted to take you right there." Santana growled into Brittany's ear before nipping her ear lobe. She moved down kissing the column of her long neck, laying rows of kisses across her color bone, and down to her breasts. She took one nipple into her mouth sucking hard enough to make Brittany press her hips into Santana's looking for friction.

"San please don't tease. I want you." Brittany's voice was dripping with need. Santana gave her exactly what she wanted. She ran her hand slowly down the blondes toned stomach and slowly down between her legs to cup the blonde who immediately bucked into her hand. "More. Please." Santana was all too happy to oblige. She ran her finger through the blonde's folds, moaning at the moisture she felt there. Doing this to Brittany would never get old. Never.

Brittany continued to buck into Santana's hand searching for the friction her body felt like it needed. When Santana started to finally circle her clit she moaned loudly. "Oh God. Inside. I need you." Brittany reached her own hand down and felt Santana's hand. She held it there as she felt Santana push two fingers inside of her. Brittany moaned deeply, holding Santana's hand still while she adjusted to the feeling. When she moved her hand and placed her arms around Santana's neck, the Latina started pumping into her.

So hot. So wet. She had never had Brittany be this demanding and she loved it. She loved knowing what the blonde wanted. She began to finger her harder as she felt the blonde bracing more and more of her weight on the Latina.

Brittany had no words left. Just guttural noises of pleasure. But she knew if Santana didn't stop she was going to fall over soon so she once again placed her hand over the hand that Santana was fingering her with and stilled it.

"Doesn't it feel good?" Santana panicked slightly. Why did she have to stop? Brittany seemed to like it. She didn't want to stop.

"Too good. Gonna fall over." Brittany's breathing was still uneven and she was so wet she swore she could feel it running down the inside of her legs.

"Let's get out and finish in the bedroom." Brittany nodded. Santana helped her out and they hurriedly dried and brushed their hair before Santana got impatient and pulled Brittany into her room, neither of them bothered to cover up with towels.

When they got into Santana's room, the Latina pushed Brittany up against the wall again and started kissing her with all of the passion she felt. The blonde started to grind her hips into hers again when Santana thought of something. She pulled away from Brittany with a slight pop of their lips and a whine from Brittany as she followed trying to pull Santana back into a kiss.

"Britt, could I maybe go down on you? I want to. Really bad. But if it makes you uncomfortable we don't have to." Brittany swallowed hard and felt her heart rate pick up. She wanted to, she was pretty sure. She wanted everything with Santana. So she nodded.

"But we can stop if I ask right?"

"Always Brittany, always." The kiss that followed was slower, more loving than heated as Santana walked Brittany backwards to the bed, their lips never parting. Brittany lay down and scooted herself back so she was lying on the pillows. Santana turned all the lights off except one in the corner of her room, hoping that the semi darkness would make Brittany more comfortable. "Are you ready baby?" Santana asked gently. Noticing how the tone of this evening had shifted so dramatically. She loved this tone too. Needy Brittany was wonderful, but so was demure Brittany.

She crawled up form the foot of the bed, parting Brittany's legs as she went. Her long legs parted easily, Santana felt no resistance. Had she, she would have stopped. She stretched her body up to kiss Brittany again, feeling the blonde ease even more under the soothing kiss, and touch of her hands. When she felt like Brittany was ready she started to kiss slowly back down her body. Sensing now that there was no need to rush. When she got far enough down she scooted her lower half and lay down between the blondes legs. She began by laying soft kisses all around the soft patch of damp curls. She kissed softly down her lips, careful not to part them. She was waiting for Brittany to become comfortable with this level of intimacy before she went any further. While she kissed, she ran one of her hands over the blonde's abs and down her thigh. When she heard little noises of enjoyment start to come from Brittany, she used her left hand to part her gently, and dipped her tongue in for the first time.

She never wanted to leave. Ever. She had been extremely turned on by the idea of going down on Brittany but the reality was even better. She pressed her tongue against the tight ring of muscle at Brittany's opening, feeling the blonde move her hips lightly encouraged Santana but she wanted to take her time. She nudged Brittany's clit with her nose, enjoying the intake of breath she heard. She ran a light lick from her opening up to her clit and flicked across it a few times before drawing her tongue back in her mouth fully tasting Brittany. It was salty, and tasted exactly how Brittany's arousal smelled. Which was amazing to Santana.

How they hadn't done this sooner Brittany will never know. Somewhere lingering in the back of her mind remained the self-consciousness that she felt earlier about having Santana do what she was doing right now. But it felt amazing. She found it hard to believe the Latina had never done this before. She wanted it to go faster and never ever end at the same time. "Santana" She moaned the other girls name at a particularly well-placed stroke that sent a jolt through her.

On her next pass down she decided to try something new. She began to press her tongue inside of Brittany. The squeak of surprise followed by a moan was a clear indication that the blonde had enjoyed it. She moved her tongue in and out a few times before pulling back out and licking back up to her clit. Brittany sighed at the loss. Santana knew what she wanted and she grinned into her as she slowly entered her with two fingers, while continuing to place small kitten licks to her clit. After a few moments she started to very slowly move in and out while placing her softened lips around the sensitive bud and sucking gently. The resulting scream was encouraging as Brittany accidentally bucked up into her. Santana felt herself growing hard again with the taste of Brittany and the sounds she was making. She pressed herself into the blankets to relieve some of the tension that was building in her as well.

She started to move her fingers in and out faster as she flicked Brittany's clit back and forth with her tongue. "Mmmm uh" Brittany was making nonsense noises now. Just moaning. The only word Santana could really pick out at this point was her name. She continued to grind into the blanket in time with her fingers pulsing in and out of Brittany. She couldn't deny that she wanted desperately to be inside of the blonde but she was also very ok with what she was doing. When Brittany started to pant harder she started circling her clit with her tongue, something she knew Brittany liked when she did with her finger. The blonde tensed up and Santana knew she wasn't far. She continued to do this until she started feeling Brittany shake, which she knew meant that she was just on the edge. Between licking Brittany, listening to her, and the delicious friction of the blanket on her she didn't know that she would last much longer either. She was to turned on to be embarrassed.

When Brittany started shaking Santana once again softened her lips and started to gently suck as she fingered Brittany harder. The blonde's body violently trembled before Santana felt the fingers inside her being squeezed. The blonde arched her back up trying to get as close to Santana as possible. "Sa-an. I'm cu-cumming". Santana moaned onto Brittany's clit. She'd never heard something so sexy in her life. She felt the blonde's walls clenching and unclenching around her fingers. The Latina ground into the bed twice more before she herself started coming again.

Brittany thought something exploded inside of her. She thought maybe something broke. But it didn't matter. It felt better than anything had ever felt before and she never wanted it to stop. When her orgasm started to subside though she felt Santana pull her fingers out and press one more light kiss to her now swollen folds before kissing her way back up her body. The blonde could not catch her breath and her body was still shaking when Santana lay next to her, pulling the shaking sweating body into hers and kissing Brittany with every emotion she felt.

After a few seconds the blondes breathing evened out but she was still shaking. "Cold baby?" Brittany nodded into Santana's chest so the Latina stretched out and worked the blanket from under them and pulled it on top. The action reminded her that she would need to definitely wash it tomorrow. Brittany pressed her body back into Santana's kissing her again.

"I like tasting myself on you." Brittany said before languidly stroking Santana's tongue with hers. She warred with herself briefly between being exhausted from the week and wanting this night to never end. She pressed herself in tighter, wondering if the Latina would make that decision for them. She expected to feel Santana's hard appendage pressing into her belly but she didn't. She pulled away from Santana quicker than she meant to. "Did you not like it?"

"Wait what?"

"Doing that. Oral. Being down there. Because you're not hard and I thought that maybe you would be." Santana's eyes went big for a moment and then looked down. She was kind of hoping she wouldn't have to tell Brittany about that event because it was kind of embarrassing.

"No. I really liked it. Like really really. I'd do it again, often, preferably. I liked it so much I" she sighed. "I came. Already. From pressing myself into the bed. I was just so turned on I couldn't help it." The idea of Santana being so turned on by her that she came without being touched was extremely sexy to Brittany.

"God that's hot Santana." The Latina had been expecting laughter so when she heard Brittany voicing breathy approval, she let go of her embarrassment about the issue. They fell into a comfortable silence. Santana thinking about what they had done, and Brittany thinking about something they had yet to do.

"Santana." She said quietly. Santana made a noise indicating that she was listening. "I just wanted you to know that I really like doing that stuff too. What I mean is" She took a deep breath. She wanted this thought to come out as clearly as possible. "I love when you touch me. I want it, even when we aren't together. I don't I had ever really been turned on before you and I'm glad it's you that got me to feel it. I love how close to you I feel when you're touching me or I'm touching you. And I want you to know that me not being ready to have sex with you isn't about you. I'm almost ready. I just need a little more time to retrain my brain to thinking about sex in a good way. Everything so far has been amazing and I don't want to ruin it by doing it to early. But soon. I feel myself wanting it. And I think that's a good sign that I'm almost ready." Santana swallowed back her emotions. These were good things Brittany was saying and she did not want to let herself get caught up in negative feelings of remember why Brittany is uncomfortable, or afraid of sex in the first place.

"I'm glad that you want to, I do too. Any way I can be close to you on a deeper level, I want it. I want to make you feel good like that. I want it to be something that is amazing. I want to make love to you." She barely stutters on the world love. Brittany doesn't react at all, Santana believes this is a good thing. "But I do want you to know that I would wait forever. If I had to, I would."

"Oh no it definitely won't be forever. There's no way I could resist you for that long." Brittany replied. Then she yawned a huge yawn, knowing that she was fighting a losing battle of being tired.

"Go to sleep babe. You've had such a big week." Santana kissed the blonde again before cuddling down closer to her. Not long after she felt Brittany's breathing even out which is a sure sign that she's sleeping. Santana followed by only a few minutes, both of them completely exhausted.

In the room down the hall Quinn had her IPod headphones plugged in and the volume turned up high trying to drown out the sounds that she had been hearing all night. She was trying not to be angry, and was trying even harder to pretend that she wasn't ecstatic about her best friends happiness.

---

AN 2: To clear up a few things that have been showing up in reviews. No Beth never happened. Brittany does have an older sister, for sure. I know that got confusing because I'm an idiot but she does have an older sister.

Santana's brothers will be back. Promises.

I'm changing my mind due to a great point made by one of my readers about my decision to put them in school at NYU. So now they are in school in New Jersey at Rutgers. I don't know if that school has all of the programs or facilities that I talk about in this story, I literally know nothing about the school, it's a location thing.

OK. I think that's everything.

Thoughts and feelings?