Chapter Ten

The funeral was that Tuesday, and it may have been the most difficult day of my life. Early in the morning, Sakura and Sasuke came over to my tiny house, dressed in their black formalwear. Once they had come over, Naruto and his parents left my house to go get changed. I could tell by the twist in his face that Naruto wanted anything but to leave my side. I was still emotionally unstable, and he knew that, but Sakura promised him that she and Sasuke would look after me.

When Naruto left, Sakura took me upstairs and picked out a plain black dress for me to wear. Luckily, she chose one with sleeves, because the wind was blowing terribly outside. I dressed, feeling a chill run down my spine. I didn't want to face this day. I wanted to return to my bed and keep myself locked in a dark house with nobody here.

But I couldn't do that, especially not with people around me who care about my well-being. Sakura wouldn't allow me to miss my parents' funeral; she said that if I didn't go, I'd regret that decision for the rest of my life.

I lifted the pile of hair on my back up, so that Sakura could zip the back of my dress. I could hear a sigh come from her as she did so, and I knew that she was taking in the severity of the day. This was the last time I would ever see my parents, and I may not have the opportunity to even see them. Minato told me that, depending on the condition of the bodies, they may have to have closed caskets.

I turned my gray eyes to the full-length mirror hanging on my wall and examined my body, smothered in the thin, dark dress. It barely reached my knees, and my calves were extremely white in comparison.

"You're beautiful, Hinata," Sakura murmured to me and took my hair in her hands, pulling it away from my shoulders. My eyes closed as I felt the urge to cry again; I've been doing so much of that lately. "I bet your parents are so proud of you."

The muscles in my face ached as I tried so hard not to start bawling again. They trembled, and my eyebrows contracted towards one another. Despite how hard I tried, tears broke through the dam I created, and they flooded down my cheeks. So much air that had been stored in my lungs came out in deep breaths.

Sakura moved in front of me and constricted her arms around my shoulders, holding me tightly as I broke again. My body wasn't in control whenever I returned the gesture; My arms slithered around her torso and my hands gripped the fabric on her back.

I had never dreamed I would have a friend who would hold me when I was sad. I never really knew how comforting it could be. Before, it was my mother who alleviated me of my sadness by sitting with me and holding me.

Thank you.

OoO

Naruto and Sakura stayed by my side the entire funeral service, because I had nobody else to see. I had no family; my grandparents were all deceased, and my aunt and uncle were Neji's parents, who died a few years before. The only family I had now was Neji, who was still in the hospital.

I knew that the accident had been bad, and I almost breathed a sigh of relief when I walked into the funeral home and saw both of the caskets, side-by-side, lids closed. A part of me wanted to see them, because I needed closure. The other part of me remembered what Neji's body looked like, and he was the only survivor.

Maybe it was a good thing, that the caskets were closed. I wasn't entirely sure that I would want to remember my parents as cold, white and dead. Whenever I would think about them, I wanted to think of them as warm, alive and nurturing. I didn't want any of my memories of them to falter. I'm certain that seeing their corpses might have erased every jovial memory I had of my parents.

Lee ended up coming back from college for the service, and the moment he saw me, his face contorted into a pitiful grimace, and he embraced me tightly. He smelled nice, and I had forgotten how nice he actually was, and how he made me feel like such an important person. His hair grew longer, but it was still cupping his face like a giant bowl. It was so great to see him, despite the occasion.

"Hinata, how are you doing?" he asked, and I took notice to how he still refrained from using contractions.

I nodded, and I spoke up, my voice softer than usual. "I'm doing okay," I lied. I really wasn't doing okay. I was in pain, and some unknown force was still trying to pry my heart from my chest. I wasn't sure if my eyes were still puffy from random breakdowns, but I think I was safe to say that they were.

"That is good to hear," he said, and I could tell by observing his face that he knew I was putting on a brave mask for the sake of my friends. "How is Neji holding up?" That was the first time I had heard Lee breathe Neji's name, and I was still waiting to hear the vice versa.

All I could think of was the sight that I saw on Wednesday last week, of Neji lying half-dead in the hospital bed with all of those cords and pipes.

But I trusted what Minato had told me on Sunday.

"He's in bad condition, but he's going to survive."

Please, let Minato be right.

Lee nodded once and turned his eyes away for a moment, his vision glued to the wall on my right. "I am glad that he is okay."

"I'm going to see him after the funeral." That word stung my tongue, and I winced inconspicuously. "Do you want to come?"

Lee slid his hands into the pockets of his dress pants and returned his gaze to me. I could tell that he was a bit nervous, and that he did want to see his former best friend. However, I knew better than anybody what it felt like to be a burden on the people around me, so I recognized the twist in his face. He did not want to show up in Neji's hospital room uninvited, and worry about getting Neji all worked up. With his condition, an increased heart rate would probably not be for the best.

"Send him my best wishes, and my condolences," Lee finally said, and I understood completely and forced a grateful smile.

"I will."

Lee stood behind me when the pallbearers lifted the caskets that contained my parents, and Naruto immediately inched closer to my right side, knowing that I was going to be mourning. As a comforting gesture, he slipped his fingers in between mine and squeezed my hand so tightly, and I returned the action. I think I may have hurt his hand when I contracted the muscles in my fingers, baring down on Naruto's hand. But he didn't say anything; he allowed me to clutch as hard as I needed to.

I grinded my teeth as the pallbearers began marching in my direction, and then turning to strut past me, carrying the source of my strength out of the room with them. I couldn't help it; I lost it as they removed my parents from the room, and I followed them, almost wanting to chase after them and beg them not to take my family away from me.

Naruto led me to his father's midnight blue car, where we slid into the back seats and waited for the procession to begin. Minato and Kushina took the front seats, of course, sitting down and shutting their doors, cutting off the bitter wind.

Neither of them turned to look back at me, and I appreciated the fact that they didn't. In the funeral home, my skin burned every time somebody's eyes bore down upon me for more than an instant. I knew that I was the topic of interest in there, and I heard my name being whispered over and over again. But what the world didn't seem to understand is that I didn't want their pity. I didn't want them to feel sorry for me.

The only person that was allowed to feel sorry for me was me.

A bunch of peers that I recognized from school were in there, and I wondered why they had come. I mean, it was a thoughtful gesture, but I didn't know most of them, and I doubt any of them knew of my existence.

I glanced out the window and realized that this procession to the cemetery was very small; the majority of the people who had shown up for this event were mostly those people from school. I didn't mind that it was small, and I don't think my parents would have wanted a bunch of unnecessary people attending.

I felt my hand compress, and I glanced down, still seeing my fingers interlocked with Naruto's. Our hands rested on both of our thighs, which were touching.

For a moment, I blushed, but then I began to cry; not because I was sad, but because I was overwhelmed with happiness that my parents did not leave me all alone. They left me in the care of the person that I'm head over heels for, and with his kind and nurturing parents. They left me with Neji, who would live and come home eventually.

I wasn't alone.

I pressed my forehead to Naruto's and I weeped for both my joy and my sorrow. We both closed our eyes and sat, thigh to thigh, hand in hand, forehead to forehead. I could hear my own sobs as I tried so desperately to control myself.

"Naruto," I forced the voice out of my throat, and his head retreated just enough to where he could look me in the eyes. I let my eyelids slide open, and I stared into an ocean of blue, drowning again. Here he was, right in front of me, just like I always dreamed he would be. "Thank you."

Naruto let my hand go, and he cradled my face with both of his strong hands, wiping away my tears with the pads of his thumbs.

"For what?" he asked me, his voice low, almost a murmur. Desperately searching for an answer, he scanned my tear-streaked face, and his features softened, melting, almost. I overlapped his hands with mine, squeezing them gingerly.

"For being my friend."

Naruto stared at me for a moment, and I was afraid that I had said something weird. My eyes clearly painted out my terror, because he felt the need to reinforce that he was not going anywhere. Naruto wrapped both arms around my figure, one hand cradling the back of my head, the other gripping my back.

At that, both of us let out all of our emotions in a wave of tears.

OoO

I stepped into Neji's room with Naruto stalking close behind, never once leaving the area of my shadow. My cousin's eyes were open, and he stared at the ceiling, tracing the outlines with his pupils. While his body was still a wreck, and the cords and pipes have not decreased in number since I was here on Wednesday, he did seem better. Maybe it was due to the fact that he was conscious, and didn't look completely dead.

"Neji?" I spoke softly to him, and his pupils revolved around to face the sound of the noise. I could tell, just by the look on his face, that he was in so much physical pain, and I wished that there was something I could do to help relieve him of that burden.

I pulled a chair up to Neji's bedside, exactly the spot where I had fallen almost a week ago. Naruto mimicked my actions, and drug a chair across the floor of Neji's room, moving closer to his bed.

Neji's eyed Naruto cautiously, and I wasn't sure why.

"How are you feeling?" I gripped his hand, and he squeezed mine in reply. He returned his gaze to the ceiling, letting his vision wander. I began growing nervous. What if he couldn't hear me, or what if he didn't know who I was? Fear struck me, and it hit hard. For a moment, the wind was knocked out of my stomach, and it became difficult to breathe.

I remembered that the lady with the red lips at the Critical Care desk had said that Neji had some bruising on the surface of his brain, and that the doctors weren't entirely sure if it would heal or not. She never did tell me, however, what part of his brain that the bruising occurred. What if he could no longer see the things around him?

"Why was I chosen to live?" Neji spoke, finally, and I gaped at him in perplex. I wasn't following what he meant. "Aunt and Uncle...they should have been allowed to return to you."

I turned my eyes to our hands, and I noticed how many veins were visible in his wrist now, and wondered if it was temporary.

"Lee," I began telling him, trying in despair to change the subject. "He sends his condolences, and he wishes that you make a full recovery."

Neji's eyes returned to me, and his eyebrows smooshed together.

"Lee?" As if they were on a single-lined track, his eyes moved back to study the contours of the ceiling. "I haven't talked to him for a while."

"I know," I said, and exhaled slowly, clearing my head. "He and I are close friends. We write letters, since I don't have a phone."

After I quit talking, the room was silent for an awfully long time, and the three of us sat there in taciturnity. Neji and I never let our grip on each other's hand falter; it was as if we held on to each other for dear life. We couldn't bear to let the other slip away when we were so close.

Neji's breathing wasn't entirely steady. Sometimes he would miss a breath, and then suck in a deep one. I sensed that he was having difficulty with something so basic. After all, he had metal rods jutting out from his thorax, stabilizing his ribcage.

That terrified me. What if something bumped into one of those rods; would it be enough to cause a compound fracture in his ribs? My stomach churned at the thought.

"Naruto," Neji spoke up, his voice cracking, and the blonde boy beside me turned his eyes towards my cousin. Neji took in - what looked to be - an excruciatingly painful breath of bleachy air. "Thank you. For taking care of Hinata, I mean." His words shocked me. Neji never thanked anybody, besides my late parents. He rarely spoke to anybody, even, besides me.

I think he stopped speaking to people after his parents died the summer going into high school. That must have been why he cut his ties with Lee. I didn't realize it until now, but I was convinced that that was the reason. Neji became cold to the outside world once the shock of his parents' death subsided, and he only spoke to my parents and me.

"You don't have to thank me," Naruto said to Neji, causing him to run his eyes along the imaginary cord in order to face my lifelong crush. "She needed my help, and I came running. I always will." I was silent, and his words caused my heart to skip a beat. Neji just stared at him with soft eyes - something I hadn't seen out of him in the longest time. "And I'll do the same for you, because you're important to her."

Neji, if he could have, I knew, he would have nodded at this time, giving me a sign of approval to chase after my dear Naruto and give him my heart.

Oh, Naruto.

"Hinata, there's something you should know," Neji began, and both Naruto and I turned our full, undivided attention away from any distractions. "Don't ever drop out of school," he said, and I cocked my head, my blue-black hair falling to the side. I wasn't planning on dropping school; I was so close to finishing.

I turned around to glance at Naruto, who gave me the same confused gape.

"Because our family was poor and scraping the bottom of the barrel for money, Uncle decided to take out a life insurance plan. He didn't want something to happen to him, and to leave you on the streets with nothing.

"Finish school, and finish strong, because the insurance is going to be paying your way to college."

College? I knew that I wasn't going to be able to further my education past high school, because my family just couldn't afford the expenses, even if I attended community college. So, in my world, higher education only existed in fairy tales.

"Your parents loved you so much, Hinata," Neji said, and my eyes cast a soft gaze upon him. "Don't ever let yourself regret a single thing. If you want something, you've got to take it before somebody else snatches it right out from under your nose.

Naruto...

"I know you've had your issues with confidence, and you've come such a long way in only a year. I'm so proud of you, Hinata. You're finally allowing yourself to bloom like the beautiful flower you are.

"Just, never forget who you are. Never forget what your heart desires. And never lose sight of your goals."

I closed my eyes, letting Neji's inspirational words sink into every cell of my body.

Thank you, Neji. I nodded internally. I won't.

OoO

Naruto and I stepped out into the bitter night, silent with one another. Neither of us had really said anything since Neji had given me that motivational speech; I think I was safe in saying that both of us had been moved.

Never forget what your heart desires.

What my heart desires most is walking home with me in the darkness of night. He had both of his hands in his pockets, and his eyes flickered from the ground to the vast sea of stars watching over us. Our breaths created foggy mists that shrouded our mouths.

I wasn't entirely sure how far we walked before Naruto stopped dead in his tracks, turning his eyes back to the pavement below our feet. I halted, too, twisting around to look at him. My legs were freezing, because of the dress that I was still wearing from the funeral, and they began to tremble.

"Naruto?" I asked, turning my entire body to face him. "Are you okay?"

Naruto had a serious look in his face as he filled the space in between us, and he stared down into my eyes, causing me to blush.

"Neji said that if you want something, you've got to take it before someone else takes it first, right?" he asked, and I wasn't entirely sure where he was getting at, but I nodded my head.

"Yes, he did."

"Do you believe that people should be so greedy?"

The word 'greed' reminded me of myself, and why my parents were gone in the first place. I had become too greedy, wanting too much.

However, in the context that Neji had put it, I knew he was telling me never to let Naruto slip through my fingers, because he was a precious gift that I had received. I never wanted to give him up, and so I knew how to answer his question.

"Yes."

"Good," Naruto said, and then clasped both of his hands onto my cheeks and yanked me towards him, pressing his lips to mine both tenderly and forcefully.

He had caught me off guard, and when I realized exactly what was happening, a little part of me died as I stood there, smothered in his embrace.