Chapter 10: Saving a Child
In the morning, after breakfast, Alistair found himself alone with Starr. They had the kitchen all to themselves. Nervously, Alistair spoke up, "Starr, do you have a minute? There's something I want to talk to you about."
Starr hadn't slept last night, thinking of the events of the previous day. She turned tired eyes to Alistair, and smiled. "What is it, Alistair? You can't be ready for a snack already, can you? You just finished breakfast."
"No, it isn't that. Sit down, please," Alistair waited until Starr sat down, then sat next to her and took hold of her hands. "Starr, we've been friends a long time, and now we 'have a child' together. Marcail is great, and you are obviously a good mother. There's something between us, I'm not sure what it is, but I know you feel it too. I can see us together years from now. Many people start married life with less than that," as Starr's eyes got wide; he rushed on, "Starrelena Feyorlin, will you marry me?"
Starr pulled her hands from his and shot up, "No, I can't, I can't marry you; I can't marry anybody. I, I have to go!" She quickly left the kitchen and castle, leaving Alistair confused.
Alistair continued sitting for a minute, "Well, I wasn't expecting that reaction. Why wouldn't she want to get married? No, why can't she get married? Maker, she's not married already!" He panicked for a second, "No, that's not it. I am going to find out what's going on, but I better let her calm down first." Thoughts kept chasing each other in his mind. Getting up he decided to find Teagan and take care of his son. He really liked the sound of that, 'his son.'
Alistair didn't have an opportunity to talk to Starr. The morning soon got busy. A scout reported that the mages were on the way. Starr, Bella and Kaitlyn worked quickly to make sure there were refreshments available for the comfort of Connor's benefactors, Elissa and the others. Morrigan joined Teagan, Isolde and Alistair in the hall, assuring them that Connor was still calm. Zevran whiled away the time flirting outrageously with Starr, Bella and Kaitlyn, which succeeded in irritating both Alistair and Teagan.
During the activity, Marcail and Bevin were able to sneak in and hide themselves in the hall where they could see everything. After all, Connor was their friend, they wanted to make sure he was all right, besides, they might never get the opportunity to see a bunch of mages performing magic again. Soon, the mages were here. Bevin and Marcail looked at each other in bemusement; they were all wearing dresses, even the men! They turned their attention back to the hall.
The older woman who came to Redcliffe with the Wardens lay on the floor, they saw Marcail's mother come in with some cushions for her comfort, and Lady Isolde scowling and wringing her hands. The remaining mages gathered in a circle and began waving their arms and chanting. The boys held their breath in anticipation and watched as the air around the mages seemed to shimmer and sparkle. Elissa, Alistair, Starr and the others remained on the edges of the room, watching intently. The guards that came with the mages kept their hands on their swords, but the boys couldn't figure out why. Marcail thought they must be uncomfortable with those buckets on their heads, and how could they see properly? What's the use of being prepared to fight if you can't see everything? Marcail didn't think that was very smart at all and promptly dismissed them.
The boys kept waiting for something else to happen, but they were disappointed. Finally, the mages relaxed, some sagged, and Alistair helped the old lady off the floor. When Teagan told the mages that Starr had arranged a meal for their benefit, one of the mages, a blond man, took Starr's hand and brought it to his lips and exclaimed that she was the perfect woman: beautiful and kind. As the boys came out of their hiding place, the First Enchanter intervened before Alistair's scowl could become permanent, "Anders, that's enough, you're embarrassing the lady." Turning to Starr, he smiled kindly, "I'm sure we would all appreciate a good meal."
Marcail and Bevin ran up to the First Enchanter before they could leave, "Are you done, is Connor ok? Can we go see him?" The boys anxiously waited for his reply.
"Marcail Alistair Feyorlin, have you and Bevin been here the whole time?" Starr demanded, turning from the over-friendly mage to look at her son, hands on her hips. "You know very well you aren't supposed to be here." She waited, eyes stern, for an answer.
Marcail knew he was in trouble when his mother used all his names. He looked up at her pleadingly, "Mom, he's our friend. We need to know he's ok, please?"
Bevin nodded his head and chimed in, "Please, Aunt Starr," and waited for her to reply.
Starr softened; she bent down and kissed both boys on their heads, making them turn red with embarrassment. "The two of you have good hearts, Connor is fine and he's going to need his friends. However, you still weren't supposed to be here. So now, you are both going to help serve dinner; if you do a good job, you can take some sandwiches, milk and cookies up to his room for all three of you. Understand?" The boys weren't happy, but they nodded. It could have been a lot worse.
Starr's mouth twitched as she heard Marcail ask Anders why he was wearing a dress, and if Connor would have to wear one too. Lady Isolde had already gone to see her son, which gave her the added benefit of not being in the company of the mages. Starr took the First Enchanter's arm and led him to the dining hall, following Teagan and Wynne. Everybody enjoyed the meal, relieved that Connor was going to be fine. Afterwards, Kaitlyn helped the boys carry food to Connor's room while the mages and templars took their leave. Anders whirled Starr around in a brief dance and asked her to marry him before the templars could hustle him away. Wynne shook her head in amusement as she watched her fellow mages go back to the Tower.
Teagan went upstairs with the wardens to meet with Isolde and check on Eamon. Starr and Bella took care of the dining hall and kitchen, Starr packing up some items for traveling. Bella looked over at Starr and teased, "So, what did you think of Anders? I thought he was rather attractive. He even proposed, were you tempted?"
"Must be something in the water," mumbled Starr, refusing to look at her friend.
"Oh?" Bella waited.
"Alistair asked me to marry him earlier this morning," Starr admitted, grudgingly.
Bella looked at Starr, sadness in her eyes. "You refused, didn't you? You deserve to be happy, Starr."
"Of course I refused. And you know why. Alistair deserves better, somebody whole who can make him happy, I can't be that." Starr looked so miserable that Bella went over and gave her a hug.
"Starr, you're scared to try. You need to talk to him; he seems like a good man. Give him a chance; don't deny both of you because you're afraid. I don't think he would disappoint you. I can tell you one thing, I would give my back teeth to have Teagan look at me the way Alistair looks at you when he thinks you're not looking." Bella blushed; she hadn't meant to admit her feelings for the nobleman. "At least think about it."
Neither woman realized that Zevran was nearby and had heard the entire conversation. "So, Alistair proposed. Poor Alistair, if he is really romantically interested in the lovely Starr, he has bigger obstacles than his own ineptitude." Zevran tried to push back the unwelcome feelings of concern, and quietly strolled away. "Zevran, you are letting the first good food since you arrived in Ferelden mess with your judgment. It is none of your concern, except as amusement."
It was fortunate that Zevran moved away when he did, as Starr went upstairs to get Marcail. She stood in the doorway and watched the three boys as they chatted about this and that. When Connor got quiet, Marcail and Bevin talked or played until Connor was ready to join back in. She noticed that Connor looked tired, "Boys, you can talk to Connor again tomorrow, when none of you are having lessons or doing chores. Right now, it's time to leave." Marcail and Bevin told Connor they would see him later, and left with Starr. Marcail was quiet, when they got outside Bevin ran home.
"Are you leaving now?" Marcail asked, lower lip quivering slightly. "Do you really have to go?" He looked up at his mother, hoping she had changed her mind. Starr walked with him over to the docks and they sat down.
"Soon. I love you, Marcail, more than anything in the world. I would like nothing better than to stay with you, but the Blight will destroy everything if somebody doesn't stop it. As your mother, I have a responsibility to keep you safe. Teagan and Bella can take care of you in Redcliffe, Bella loves you and Teagan cares about you. But, they can't help with the darkspawn, I can. If I didn't think the best way to keep you safe was to help the Wardens, I wouldn't leave. Remember when I went to Ostagar? Remember our star?" Starr waited until he looked at her and nodded. "I promise you, every night I will look up at that star and think of you, tell you I love you. Will you do the same?" Marcail promised and they hugged each other, tightly.
That's how Alistair found them. He swallowed past the lump in his throat, he felt overwhelmed by the feelings engendered by the sight of the two of them, and the knowledge that he would be leaving shortly. "Maker's breath, I wish I could stay. I can't believe she named him after me, Marcail Alistair. I like the sound of that." He walked forward and sat down next to them, then cleared his throat. "Starr, it's time," he said hoarsely. "Marcail, I wish I could stay and get to know more about you. I am going to miss you, more than you know." His eyes filled with tears when Marcail hugged him and sniffled. He blinked them back, "I want to let you both know something, I am so happy to be your father, Marcail. I wrote a letter acknowledging, telling the world, that I am your father. Bann Teagan currently has your copy; the Revered Mother has the other copy. I want you to have proof that anybody can see, in case I'm not able to say anything and you need it." He didn't want to think about the possibility that he might not be there for Marcail and Starr, his family.
Starr leaned against Alistair and laid her head on his shoulder, Alistair put his arm around her shoulders, loosely embracing both of them. Marcail looked at him, eyes wide, "Does this mean I can call you Dad?"
"I would like nothing better," Alistair smiled at him.
"Mom, you need to tell him about our star, so I can talk to him, too. Is Fen going with you?"
"Of course I'll tell him about the star. Don't you want Fen to stay here?" Starr looked him in the eye, seeing how important this was to him.
"He'll help you and Dad. You know a lot of people here don't like him. He's going to be awfully upset with you if he's here and you're not."
"Fen?" queried Alistair.
"I'll explain later," Starr told him. To Marcail, "If it will make you feel better, Fen can come with us." Marcail nodded vigorously. "Well, that's decided. I guess we should go back to the castle, now, they're probably waiting for us." Holding hands, Marcail in the middle, the three of them slowly walked to meet the others.