Most Hogwarts students could not believe their eyes when they happened to encounter James and Lily walking down that hallways engaged in civilized conversation. They even seemed capable of working together in class without calling each other names or sending hexes flying in each other's directions. The teachers appreciated the reprieve from the constant bickering, but were unsure what to make of it. Only Professor Dumbledore seemed to encourage a Potter-Evans alliance. The new relationship happened to be the topic of discussion after a Prefect meeting late one night. Lily and Gideon were out patrolling the hallways when Gideon decided to bring up the subject.
"So you and James seem to be getting along swimmingly," Gideon Prewitt commented slyly.
Lily started to blush furiously. She was getting tired of constantly answering questions about James. Today alone she had at least five people come talk to her, most of the girls. They were concerned that James Potter was off the market. At first Lily just laughed at the thought of being in a relationship with James, but now she was just getting irritated. Couldn't people just accept the fact that they were friends? Plenty of people had managed it in the past, why was it so hard to believe that she and James were capable of civil relationship?
"Yes well we have come to a mutual understanding of each other and have decided it is for the better that we stop biting each others heads off," Lily said.
"Well I'm impressed that you managed to avoid falling for the Potter charm for this long," Gideon said with a wink.
With this comment, Lily grew a very irritated look on her face. She didn't like James in a romantic fashion and she wished people would stop thinking that she fancied him. She thought of him like she did her female friends. He was someone she could talk to about her aspirations and that was it. His messy hair and arrogant smile still bothered her. She knew he still hexed people and baited Snape so he was still a git, but for some reason it didn't bother her as much as it used to and he was taking steps towards deflating his head. The thing that had improved most in their relationship was that he had stopped constantly pestering her to go out with him. Although at times she felt herself missing the attention, but she would never admit that to anyone.
"I haven't fallen for anything Gideon. We are just forced to work together on McGonagall's project," Lily said bitingly.
"Yeah that's how Dorcas and I started out and now we have been together for two years," Gideon replied with a knowing smile.
"Stop it nothing is going on, we are barely friends. We just tolerate each other and that's it," Lily said coolly.
Unbeknownst to Lily, James had overheard everything on his way back from detention with Filch. In a fit of excitement after the Gryffindor Quidditch team's first win over Hufflepuff, he had "accidently" set off some dungbombs in the care taker's office and had been stupid enough to get caught. He had spent the better part of the night polishing the school's trophies without magic. Thank god he had the mirror with him so he could talk to Sirius, who was busy doing detention with Flitwick. He had heard Lily's voice and had decided to hide around the corner from where she and Gideon were talking so he could scare her when she passed by.
What he heard had hurt him and when Lily turned the corner and saw his stricken face, he immediately turned around and headed straight back towards the common room. How could she treat their relationship with such callous disregard, he thought to himself. He thought they had made progress and that she was actually starting to like him. How could she be so cold? He reached the common room and went straight upstairs to his room. He was in no mood to talk to anyone. A Fifth year approached him as he made his way across the room and tapped him on the shoulder.
"James, I was wondering if maybe you would like to go to Hogsmede with me this weekend?" the girl asked quietly.
"Bugger off Flora," was all he could get out as he pushed past her.
The girl blushed with embarassment and ran back over to her friends on the verge of tears.
"See I told you he was dating Lily," another girl said.
After hearing this, James became enraged. He was tired of all the gossip. Why wouldn't people just leave him alone.
Sirius and Remus were busy talking to a bunch of 6th year girls, but turned around when they heard James stomp upstairs. They turned and looked at each other.
"Reckon we should follow?" Remus asked.
"Nah let him blow off some steam then we'll see if he wants to talk," Sirius said as he turned his attention back to the girls.
James reached his room and flopped down on his bed. If she only wanted to merely tolerate him, then he would do the same to her. No more helping her with Transfiguration homework, or telling her his secrets. He would treat her as if she were any other acquaintance. She said she would be there for him and she wasn't and that hurt the most.
Back in the hallway Lily's cheeks burned with embarrassment. He had obviously heard her and she felt terrible. Should she go apologize? Her pride made her want to ignore the situation, but her heart told her to go talk to him. She didn't feel the way she had told Gideon, but she couldn't admit that to herself. She actually enjoyed James' company and he could make her laugh the way no one else could. She wanted to run after him, but her pride refused to let her take a step.
"Do you think he heard me?" Lily finally asked Gideon. She just needed conformation that she had made a complete ass out of herself.
"Well the expression on James' face tells me that he heard you loud and clear," Gideon said.
This was a complete turn of the tables. Usually James was the one putting his foot in his mouth. She felt ashamed of her childish behavior.
"Should I go apologize?" Lily asked worriedly.
"That depends on what kind of relationship you want with him," Gideon said seriously.
With that, Gideon left Lily and headed back to his common room. He felt the urge to tell Dorcas how much she meant to him. Seeing James and Lily so miserable made him greatful for all that he had.
Lily stood there in shock. She thought about what Gideon had said and realized she had no idea what he was talking about. She wanted to continue being friends with James and that was it. She was scared to go back to the common room because she was sure that she would see James there. She wasn't ready to face him. She had to think about what she would say to him. She decided to go to the heads room to take a bath and relax her tense muscles. Perhaps there she would get some sort of epiphany about how to solve her crisis. She desperately needed to sort out her thoughts.
The next day James wearily walked down the steps to the common room intending to make his way to breakfast. He usually waited for his friends, but this morning he just wanted to eat in solitude. He was in no mood to be social and listen to Sirius ramble on about his latest trist or have Remus tell him how he should act. He suddenly came face to face with a very worried looking Chloe. She seemed panic stricken.
"James have you seen Lily? She didn't come back to the room last night," Chloe asked.
This was exactly the situation that James didn't want to deal with. He didn't want to have to worry about Lily, but he did. He knew that he would end up looking for her with Chloe, but it angered him that he cared so much for her and she merely tolerated his presence.
"No I haven't seen her. Lets go look for her," James said tiredly.
When he found her, he would give her a piece of his mind and tell her off for being so unfeeling. He would tell her off and say exactly what was on his mind. He grabbed Chloe's hand and they quickly exited the room. They started with the astronomy tower, which was a famous place for people to run off to when they were upset. When she wasn't there, they tried the potions dungeon, the herbology gardens, the prefect meeting room, the quidditch pitch, and finally the dinning hall in hopes that she would have shown up for breakfast. When she wasn't in any of the locations, Chloe and James began to panic. They had one last place to try, but they didn't have the password. They found Gideon Prewitt eating happily with his girlfriend.
"Oy Prewitt, I need the password to the heads room," James said irritably.
"Hold on James I can't just give it to anybody," Gideon said, angry at James' rude interruption.
"Lily is missing and we want to see if she's in there," James said impatiently.
With that explanation, Gideon began to smile. He very much wanted James and Lily to patch things up and he would do anything he could do to help them along. He knew all to well the pitfalls of young love. James and Lily might be oblivious to their blossoming feelings, but he wasn't.
"The password is animagi. It was Lily's idea," Gideon said.
James and Chloe were off and running towards the heads room. Thankfully James happened to have a very useful map and he knew exactly how to get there. They got to the portrait that protected the entrance and Chloe shouted the password. The portrait swung open and both sprinted inside.
The first thing they saw was a sleeping Lily. She was curled up on the couch and was sleeping soundly. James saw this and started to back away. All of his courage suddenly disappeared and he wanted to run out of the room and hide. Just looking at her hurt him. How was such a small thing capable of inflicting so much pain on him. He didn't have a chance to sneak out before Chloe approached Lily and then started to yell.
"How dare you scare me like that Lily Evans. You had me up all night worrying about you. Do you have any idea what I thought had happened to you?" Chloe shouted.
Lily bolted straight up and came face to face with an angry Chloe. She immediately turned a dark shade of scarlet and felt extreme embarrassment for falling asleep in the heads room.
"Calm down Chloe I'm fine," Lily said grogilly.
"That is no excuse. You had James and me running over the entire castle looking for you. I was about ready to call the ministry of magic," Chloe continued.
Lily's heart stopped when she heard Chloe say James' name. She looked around the room and saw a silent James standing in the corner. He was obviously trying to hide from her. Her stomach dropped when she saw the hurt look in his eyes. Lily desperately wanted to apologize for what she had said about him the night before, but she couldn't find the words.
"Alright lets go get some breakfast, I'm starving," Lily said after Chloe had finished ranting.
Chloe relented and the two girls exited the room and James followed close behind. Lily didn't say a single word to James during the long walk to breakfast and when the three students got to the dinning room, James left and went over to find his friends. He couldn't believe that Lily had said nothing to him. She had just stared at him and then acted like he hadn't existed. She didn't even thank him for coming to find her or for being concerned. She was so selfish he thought to himself. Yet, despite all of that he couldn't help but care about her.
James and Lily didn't talk for the rest of the day. They exchanged awkward glances in class and were both thankful when Professor McGonagall didn't make them pair off and work on their projects. James was still furious at her and Lily's pride was getting in the way of apologizing to him.
That night, after Lily got back from patrolling the hallways with Gideon, she walked in to find the common room empty except for one loan figure. James was busily working on a piece of parchment for Defense Against the Dark Arts. He was determined to get top marks on the assignment. He took off his glasses and rubbed his tired eye than he ran his hands through his hair messy hair and let out a yawn. He started to stretch his arms and that is when he noticed Lily staring at him.
"Can I help you Miss Evans?" he asked coolly.
"I...we need to talk," Lily stammered.
She decided to suck up her pride and straighten the situation out. She wanted to let James know that she hadn't meant to be so nasty. She needed to put James straight.
"As you can see I'm sort of busy right now. The whole world doesn't revolve around you," James replied flatly.
Lily was a tad taken aback by James' less than enthusiastic response to her suggestion. She thought he would jump at the chance to talk with her, but then again maybe that was the old James. She was astonished at how self-centered she was. Why did she think James would forgive her so quickly? So she dug her heels in and was determined to win this battle of wills.
"No I suppose it doesn't, but I need to explain a few things," Lily retorted.
"You have nothing to explain. I believe you made yourself perfectly clear last night," James said.
"Please just hear me out," Lily pleaded.
"If I do, will you leave me alone to finish my work?" James asked.
He wasn't going to give in easily. He wanted her to show him how she really felt and so he was going to make her work for his forgiveness. At his suggestion Lily reluctantly nodded her head. She had to choose battles. She went and sat down next to James and looked him straight in the eyes. James found this a bit unnerving, but he put his book down and gave her his attention.
"I want to clarify what happened last night. What I said to Gideon was out of frustration and I said some things I didn't mean," Lily said confidently.
"Well that makes me feel a whole lot better. Here I was thinking we were finally getting along well and you tell Prewitt you merely tolerate my presence," James said heatedly.
"James you know that isn't true. I....well I don't know what I want to say, but I know that you have changed and for the better since your parents' deaths," Lily said.
There she had said it. She had put her foot in her mouth royally and she couldn't take it back. She was ashamed at how callous she could be. James looked at her in shock. His face turned a shade of red and he found himself speechless.
"How dare you talk about my parents? After everything I've told you how can you be so cold?" James said furiously.
"James that's not what I meant and you know it. Stop twisting my words around," Lily said too proud to admit her mistake.
"You know something Evans, you are terrible at apologies," James spat out.
"Well you are a terrible listener. You won't admit that you did anything wrong because you have such a fat head," Lily shouted back.
"That is the pot calling the kettle black. I haven't done anything wrong and you know it," James yelled back.
"Well you shouldn't be lurking around in hallways and listening in on other people's conversations. And you should learn to accept an apology when someone tries to make one," Lily replied with her fists clinched in anger.
James looked at Lily's green eyes that were sparkling with anger. Her red hair was flowing around her face that had a furious expression on it. He almost had to laugh at how she tried to make her petite frame look bigger than it actually was. She was fiery and that is what he loved about her. She never gave in, but this time he was right and she had to know it.
"You never apologized Lily. You can't do it because of your stupid pride. Get over yourself and admit that you were wrong," James finally said.
Lily looked at him with great contempt. She wouldn't admit that he was right. She was tired of him being able to criticize her so correctly.
"Never," Lily growled.
She turned towards the staircase to her bedroom and marched straight up it. She opened the door to her room and slammed it shut behind her. She wasn't going to admit her feelings about James to anyone and especially him. She wouldn't be another twittering idiot in the James Potter fan club. She had let him get too close and she wouldn't make that mistake again.
Back downstairs James' head was still spinning from the events that had just taken place. He couldn't understand how she could be so stubborn. Somehow she had managed to blame the whole situation on him and that impressed him. Although he hated to admit it, she was definitely his match, but he was going to let her make the realization on her own. He went up to bed and couldn't help, but smile because tonight Lily undoubtedly would be thinking about him.