It's Part of the Plan…

Recap of chap 1: Phoebus "deflowers" Esmeralda and she doesn't enjoy it.

Recap of chap 2: A cloaked figure brings Esmeralda to a strange place and comforts her…and then tells her he loves her and she faints.

Recap of chap 3: Esmeralda finds out a little about the man she is now with.

Recap of chap 4: Esmeralda begins a sort of introspection, thinking about the men that have been in her life. She begins pondering the intentions of this new man and makes a decision about him.

Recap of chap 5: Claude confesses what he has done to Esmeralda. Esmeralda attempts suicide.

Recap of chap 6: Esmeralda having a major epiphany about her own sexuality.

Recap of 7: Esmeralda blames Claude for not stopping Phoebus. More of Esmeralda's epiphany. She decides to see just how far she can take things with Claude without going all the way. She discovers how she can use him, but then things go wrong.

Recap of chap 8: Claude gives Esmeralda a grand speech about love and Esmeralda begins wondering what type of girl she is.

Recap of chap 9: Esmeralda still wondering what type of girl she is and wonders how Claude can love her now that she is no longer pure. Claude overhears Phoebus talking with Jehan and relays what he overhears to Esmeralda.

Summary for chap 10: Esmeralda sees Phoebus again…make that Esmeralda sees Phoebus with Fleur-De-Lys and she becomes enraged. Claude really begins seeing Esmeralda as a scared little girl. Esmeralda wants to be who she was before and questions why she ever "loved" Phoebus in the first place. Jehan pops in for a visit.

As this is book based all characters and what not belong to Victor Hugo.

Constructive criticism is greatly accepted…flames/rants not so much. Please review whether you like it or not.

Esmeralda lay awake and vacant on the bed, drained of energy, yet contemplating her feelings towards Claude. At times she felt attracted to him, there were times when she liked him and times when she never wanted him to leave. There were also times when she was afraid of him and when she hated him. What she now felt for him went beyond the sickness between her legs…what she felt for him really did make her feel like a child. She didn't want to love him and she didn't want him to love her; she wanted him to worship him and make him promises she never intended upon keeping. But there was a small part of her that wondered what real love felt like, as no man had ever truly loved her. She had come to terms that men lusted after her, that men were attracted to her and she now saw how she could use that to her advantage. Up until now love had been the equivalent of hero worship in her eyes. But Claude was no hero. A hero was a strong and handsome knight in shinning armor who rescued damsels in distress and took them to safety. Phoebus had been her hero, but he did not make her feel safe. Claude made her feel safe. But telling Claude that she really loved him would be the same as giving him permission to abuse her the same way Phoebus had. And then she thought anew about her power.

"I could have princes and even kings and I would live comfortably…"

She then shook her head, knowing that this was how harlots thought. She was determined not to be one. She was determined to figure out what real love was and to have it, whether it be with Claude or Gringoire. In all fairness she preferred Claude…he was powerful and captivated her in such an odd way. Claude was downstairs, praying as always, so she decided to look outside. It was a beautiful day and she needed the air.

"If Claude does love me, then he will understand why I cannot make love to him."

She mused, as she looked down into the Parvis. And then came the familiar sound of hooves and a familiar voice to go along with them. But this time there was another voice with it, a female voice.

"Phoebus!"

Her voice was a frightened whisper. She was frozen on the spot and knew not what to do.

Claude too had heard the hooves and the voice and fearing that Esmeralda would attempt suicide a second time he stopped what he was doing and flew up the stairs to see her glaring down at him with hate in her eyes.

"Phoebus!"

She shouted down to him and Claude looked on, deciding to intervene only if she became a danger to herself.

"Phoebus look at me!"

Her eyes had grown wild and feral, as her hair rocked forward with the jerking motion of her body.

"Ah! And who is she? Just another tart! Look at me you callous bastard!"

She ran back inside, looking for something that would gain his attention. She found a bag of rocks and vials of unfinished experiments. She first took up the rocks and ran back over to the balustrade.

"Look at me!"

She threw down the first stone.

"For God's sake and my own look up!"

The first stone nearly grazed his head, but she missed.

"Does she know?"

She threw down two more stones, but they too missed.

"Tell her. Tell her what you did to me! I will tell her if you do not."

She frantically threw stone after stone, until they were gone. Not a one hit him or caught his attention. She darted back inside and grabbed a few vials of odd looking liquid.

"I hate you. I hate you! I HATE YOU!"

The first vial fell to the stone ground and crashed, never hitting the captain. Here Claude became nervous and wanted to intervene, as any one of those vials could easily burn through Phoebus' skin. They could even bring great harm to his sweet Esmeralda. So, he looked on with caution filled eyes and worry.

"You have looked for me, hoping I would become your harlot."

Tears flowed freely from her lovely eyes, as a second and a third vial dropped dangerously close to the captain. Phoebus turned to see liquid and glass at his heel. And Esmeralda grinned triumphantly.

"Oh no!"

Claude watched as the captain looked up and Esmeralda's face contorted into a grimace of disgust.

She kept throwing vials down, aiming for his head and screaming that she hated him and wanted to see him dead. Claude decided that now would be the best time to intervene. Grabbing her by the waist with one arm and reaching for her wrist with the other, Claude hoped to stop Esmeralda's tantrum and pull her back inside.

"Let me go! I want his new girl to know about what he does."

She elbowed him in the ribs, causing him to release her. He now knew that taking a calm and delicate approach would not help in these matters.

"Esmeralda!"

He violently grabbed both her wrists, causing her to gasp and try to pull away.

"Damn it Claude let me go!"

She kicked, she screamed and cursed, but Claude held tight and led her back inside. Once inside he threw her down onto the bed.

"You want his fiancée to know about you? She will in time! At some point men like him always slip up in their lies…she will find out sooner or later."

This was not a comfort to the seething gypsy girl. With that he turned and left to go back down into the cathedral. This was what his relationship with her was to be; an emotional upheaval every time the captain rode by. The girl felt too many emotions! One minute she was sad, the next angry and the next happy. Why couldn't she just pick one and stay with it? And was that the captain entering the cathedral just now? Had he seen Esmeralda? Phoebus began making his way over to Claude.

"Good day to you sir."

Phoebus seemed respectful and charming…it was too bad for him that Claude knew the truth.

"And to you captain. What brings you hear on such a fine day?"

Claude would not pick a fight with the captain here; out in the streets, yes…in the cathedral, no.

"I am not quite sure how to say this, but someone seems to be throwing things from up in the bell tower."

Claude nodded, letting the captain know that he was aware of what was going on.

"Yes…my ward…Quasimodo…I have had him stop…"

Lying in the cathedral, he was surely going to Hell now.

"And what reason does he have for throwing things at me?"

Claude thought quickly for another lie.

"Er…Perhaps he is jealous Captain. Perhaps he saw you the other night with that young Egyptian girl and is now seeing you with another young damsel. He has shown an interest in that dancing girl…"

He was becoming as skilled at lying as the captain. He noticed Phoebus sneering, which surely could not be a good sign.

"Tell that hideous beast of yours that I will have any woman I choose, as I can."

With that the captain left and Claude now felt his face turn red with jealousy and hatred. Phoebus would remain the same and never learn anything…he would forever be the handsome captain, whom girls fell over themselves for if only for a chance to be in his arms. They would cry over him, but he would move on to the next beautiful girl. Claude turned and looked towards the stairs, wondering what Esmeralda was doing now.

Upstairs, Esmeralda was going through everything and anything she could get her hands on. Jewels she discarded, vials of odd liquid wouldn't help, books, books and more books were of no use. And in a small drawer of Claude's desk she found it. A sharp gleaming dagger! The golden handle felt cool and excellent in her hand. This would be her new weapon against men. She took the dagger and raised it to her right cheek. It glided smoothly over her fine skin and released the ruby colored fluid beneath that fine brown skin. Surprisingly, there was no pain. This actually, in some sick sense felt good. She sliced her left cheek, her arms, legs…and then she heard the doorknob begin to turn.

"Brother, are you in here?"

That was not Claude's voice! Esmeralda gasped and looked around for a place to hide. Claude had left the door unlocked and now anyone could walk in and see her in this state.

"And what have we here?"

Jehan had spotted her.

"Oh God!"

He saw the blood oozing from several wounds and left.

"Brother!"

He shouted through the cathedral and finally Claude appeared.

"What is it Jehan?"

"A girl…There's a girl up in…your cell…"

Jehan was completely out of breath from running. He looked at his brother's face, but the news of a girl being in his cell did not seem to phase him.

"She's…she's bleeding…looks like knife wounds…and…there's a girl in your cell!"

At the news of his sweet love being harmed in any way, Claude turned and stomped back to his cell. Jehan followed, wanting to know more about the girl and why she was in his brother's private cell.

"Who is she? What have you done Claude? Is this girl part of an experiment?"

"Jehan will you be quiet!"

At the top of the stairs, Claude made a sign not for his brother to enter and he braced himself for what he was about to see.

"Child…"

That was all he could say as he sat down beside her. He quickly assessed the wounds she had inflicted upon herself and decided that they were not deep, nor were they life threatening.

"I finally found a solution to my problem."

She stated, as Claude gently removed the dagger from her hand.

"It is my beauty. If I am not beautiful, then men won't harm me."

Tears began to mingle with the blood.

"Oh Esmeralda!"

Claude placed one arm around her back and the other hand in her hair. He drew her near and let her cry into his cassock.

"Lie down a moment."

Claude placed her head onto a pillow and then he retreated out the door. Jehan was still standing at the top of the stairs.

"Get me bandages…lots of them…and…well that is all for now I suppose-"

"Who is she and what is she doing in your private chamber?"

Jehan was still pressing his brother for answers, but Claude's only concern now was Esmeralda.

"Do as I say and then I will tell you."

Claude handed his brother a small purse with more than enough money for bandages.

"And I can keep what is left?"

"Fine. Go, now!"

Claude went back into the cell. He used a small basin that was constantly near the bed and filled with cool water to wipe away the excess blood. The wounds were indeed not deep, they were superficial but on her they appeared life threatening. Esmeralda flinched, feeling the cold water on her skin.

Once the excess blood was gone, Claude rubbed something on her to help the wounds heal and to prevent scarring. And then he carefully wrapped each wound with bandages. There were no words between the two as he did all this, but Esmeralda's eyes were becoming more and more greedy.

"Claude."

He was too busy to notice the sultry tone. She decided to make her point more clear by brushing a hand over his cheek and leaning in to kiss his lips. He loved her when she was beautiful, when she was pure. He loved her when she was ugly and when she was impure. He loved her no matter what. She was constant in his eyes and that was what she wanted. He saw her for a sweet and innocent girl, not some harlot. She wanted him to see her as innocent and pure, as that was how she defined herself. She never really loved the captain and he never looked at her like Claude did. She now wondered why she was attracted to him to begin with. It was youth and looks and nothing more. Claude was more, a lot more. Esmeralda placed one hand on the back of Claude's head to deepen the kiss and pull him down onto the bed. Claude's hands had dropped the bandages and slid up to caress the sides of her breasts. And then he pulled away.

"What were you thinking you stupid girl! You could have killed yourself!"

This sudden change in his mood shocked her and made her back away.

"I was thinking that if I were ugly, then men would not want me…and the man who would ever want me would be the man who truly did love me and I would…I would love him."

She shook her head negatively, realizing that Claude loved her when she was beautiful and he loved her with cuts on her face, arms and legs.

"Why did I love Phoebus?"

She looked to Claude for some form of explanation and he looked down into her eyes, searching for the answer there.

"I think you loved him, because he was handsome. He rescued you and you saw that as an admirable quality in a man."

"I wish I had never loved him."

She sobbed, tossing something aside carelessly. She placed her head on the pillow and faced the wall. Had she never loved him she would still be Esmeralda; unique, chaste and beautiful. Now she was just Esmeralda; just another pretty girl, some unimportant and jaded youth. Had she never even seen Phoebus her life would have gone on uninterrupted and joyful. But without him she would have become stagnant and now all she wanted more than anything was to somehow go back in time and tell herself on that night that he rescued her all she knew now and somehow change the course of the events.