Journal 9
Disclaimer: I don't own Gravity Falls or Chrono Trigger
Talk-normal,
Talk-3
"Talk"-3 to Dipper
Warning's for 3's short temper, language, and slight canon divergences.
On polls, not counting reviews
Girl-4
Boy-1
It- 1
Time Traveler's Pig
"I think we're gonna die!"
Grunkle Stan had decided to create a fair to rake in some money from the bored people of Gravity Falls. However, his frugalness had reared its ugly head. Dipper and 3 had been 'volunteered' read forced to test out the sky tram. It started out okay until it started shaking and groaning.
The sky tram violently lurched and they plummeted to the ground with 3 and Dipper screaming. They landed next to Stan and Mabel.
"When I can think straight, remind me to 'haunt' Stan later." 3 said in a small voice. They had recently decided to prank Stan by hiding 3 in hard to reach spots and making noise to scare Stan.
"I'll do that when my bones are healed." He turned to Stan and informed him that, "I think the sky tram is broken. Also, most of my bones."
"Ha ha, this guy. Alright, alright. I got a job for you two." Stan laughed and pulled out a bunch of fake safety inspection certificates with the letter A+ on them. "I printed up a bunch of fake safety inspection certificates. Go slap one on anything that looks like a lawsuit." He handed them to Dipper, who handed some to Mabel.
"Let's burn them."
"Grunkle Stan, is that legal?" Mabel asked.
"When there are no cops around, anything's legal! Soos, how's that dunk tank coming along?"
Soos is blowtorching the target onto the dunk tank and called out, "Almost ready to go, Mr. Pines."
"Stan bangs on the target, the seat in the dunk tank barely moves, he grinned and announced, "Ha, you've got it rigged from here to Timbuktu! There's nothing on Earth that could knock me down!"
"Yeah, except for like a futuristic laser arm cannon." What are the chances of that happening?
"Ah. Hey, you haven't seen my red screwdriver, have ya? Darn thing went missing." Stan asked as he dug around in his toolbox.
"Maybe some magical creature or paranormal thing-um took it."
"Oi! You've been spending too much time with those kids. Alright, let's see where I put that thing."
Later, 3 heard Stan announce the Dunk Tank was open and taunting people to try to dunk him. Dipper was with Wendy eating corndogs in the shape of a "?" and talking about how unnatural and delicious it was laughing.
Mustard then dripped on her shirt and she left to clean up.
"I'll be right here! Ha-ha! I love you!" He whispered as she walked past him, Mabel then came up to them with 2 cotton candies.
"Look at you two! Getting all romantic at the fair!" They're just two friends hanging out, 3 said tersely, not pouting.
"Eh, it's no big deal." See!
"Yeah, it is!"
"Okay, you're right, it is! Isn't this amazing? I just dove in! I said, "Hey! You wanna hang out at the fair?" And you know what she said?" Dipper gushed to 3's aggravation. "'Yeah, I guess so!' It totally worked! All your advice about just going for it, it's finally paying off!"
"When are you gonna learn, Dipper? I'm always right about everything! Hey, do you smell a gallon of body spray?" She asked sniffing as a shadow fell on them
Robbie walked up to them and asked in an uncaring manner, "Hey, have either of you dorks seen Wendy around?"
"I think she jumped down the bottomless pit to once she smelled you coming, you should probably catch up to her." 3 muttered.
"Who wants to know?"
Robbie takes a bite out of Mabel's cotton candy, who protested.
"Yeah, I got some new super tight jeans. Thought she might want to check them out."
"Who would want to look at your chicken legs?"
"Yeah! You know, I think I saw her in the Bottomless Pit. You should really go jump in there." Dipper said, repeating 3's insult.
"Maybe I will, smart guy." He said, bumping Dipper on his way out.
"Please do!"
"He is such a jerk." Mabel said angrily looking at her ruined candy.
"Yeah, but he's a jerk with tight pants and a guitar. I need to keep him away from Wendy at all costs."
"I'll be there with you, brother. Whatever happens, I'll be right here, supporting you every step of the- OH MY GOSH A PIG!" She ran off, leaving 3 and Dipper behind.
"Huh, 5 seconds, that's a new record."
"I think your sister has ADHD."
"Thanks for the Bottomless Pit insult."
"No problem. Though I can't see the appeal of having more, book eating farm animals." 3 said in revulsion, it had developed a bit of a phobia of farm animals and water.
"Oh, there's Wendy!" Dipper said, running off, leaving 3 to wonder if he also has ADHD.
"Whoa, check it out! Don't know if it's a duck or a panda, but I want one!" Wendy said looking at a purple pack, dunda, puck?
Dipper walks up to ball toss game and said, "My uncle taught me the secret to these games. You aim for the carnie's head, and take the prize when he's unconscious."
"I can believe that." 3 said out loud, causing Wendy and the carnie to look around. Wendy then laughs, thinking it was a joke. "One ball, please."
"You only get one chance." The carnie warned as Wendy gave him a thumbs up.
"And a-one and a-two and a-three!" He threw the ball; it misses, bounces back, and hits Wendy in the eye. Ohh…100 points.
"AH! MY EYE!"
"Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Wendy! Are you okay?" Dipper asked frantic.
"Does it look swollen?" She asked, taking her hand off it to see a black eye. Everything's gonna be fine! Don't worry! I'll-I'll go get some ice!" He ran to the ice box, gets ice, "Where is she, where is she?" He panted, looking around and ran into a bald man and dropped the ice. "Hey, watch where you're going, man!" The man grabbed a tape measure and ran off.
"That was weird."
"No time for that now!"
He ran back to Wendy and stopped dead when he saw Robbie there, holding a snow cone over her eye.
"Just ease your eyeball into that freezy cone."
"Robbie thanks. That's really sweet. The gesture and the flavored syrup."
"Yeah, I was just here at the right place at the right time. You know, I've been meaning to ask you." He began nervously, "We've been spending a lot of time together, and I was wondering if, maybe, you want to go out with me?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
"Sweet!"
Dipper looked crushed and at that moment balloon shaped like a heart is popped by a dart behind him and he dropped the ice.
Mabel chose that moment to come back holding a pig. "Look, Dipper! I won my pet pig! His name is Waddles. I call him that because he waddles! Waaaaaaaa-dddllleeessss!" Get that book eater away from me!
"Everything is different now." He said in a pained voice.
"What are you looking at?"
He points at Robbie and Wendy getting on a ride called "Tunnel of Love and Corn-dogs"
"Oh..."
Night falls and the lights on the Ferris wheel are turned on. Dipper lies down on the Slopey Toss. He ignored a man trying to play the game, who left. Mabel came by again to shove her pig in his face dressed like a doctor.
"Paging, Dr. Waddles, we got a boy here with a broken heart. Ha-ha! Come on, man. These are the jokes."
"Mabel, do you ever wish you could go back and undo just one mistake?" I know I don't. "Nope! I do everything right, all the time!" She said proudly as she played with Waddles.
"I mean Wendy only went out with Robbie because he was there with the ice, and she needed the ice because of the baseball, and I would've had the ice if it wasn't for...that guy!" He gasped looking at the bald guy from earlier he walked up to him, shouting. "Hey, you! Toolbelt! You ruined my life! Don't huh me. I've seen you before, what's your deal? Are you following us?"
"And why are you bald? What's that all about?" Mabel asked in the same tone
"Why are you stalking children, you pedo."
"AAAAAGH! My position has been COMPRIMISED! Assuming stealth mode!" The bald man yelps and started to mess with his watch, making his suit change to different backgrounds. Were those dinosaurs in amber?
"Color match! Initiating color match! Come on, dang it!" He takes out Stan's screwdriver and tries to fix it.
"That's amazing! Are you from the future or something?" Mabel asked.
"Uh, NO! Who told you that?! MEMORY WIPE!" He throws a piece of paper in Mabel's face.
"This is a baby wipe."
The bald man sighed and said, "All right, you've cornered me. I'm... a time traveler."
"So wait a minute, if you're from the future, do you have like a time machine, or something?"
"That's... kind of how it works." He said as Robbie and Wendy rode by on the Ferris wheel.
"Can I borrow it?" Dipper asked hopefully. "Come on, can I use your time machine just once?"
"No! Out of the question! You know, this is sensitive extremely complicated time equipment." He pulls out a tape measure. I expected a time machine to be more…grand.
"It looks like a tape measure." Dipper said, unimpressed.
"You shut your time-mouth!"
Dipper looked at Mabel and asked, "This making any sense to you?"
"I think he's just crazy." Ditto.
"Oh! You don't believe me?" He pulls the tape measure, disappears, and then reappears a few seconds later in old fashioned clothes, "Guess where I was!"
"Whoa!"
"Renaissance?"
"That's right! 15 years ago there was a costume shop right here! One second!" He disappears, and then reappears in his normal suit, which is on fire, "Ah! Aw, heck! Pat! Pat down!" He pats the fire out.
"So, who are you again?" Mabel asked.
"Blendin Blandin, Time Anomaly Removal Crew year twenty snyeventy-twelve. My mission is to stop a series of time anomalies that are supposed to happen at this very location! But-but I don't see any anomalies! I don't know if it's some kind of paradox or I'm just really tired..." Maybe you caused them by being here?
Dipper then says, "You know, you sound like you could use a break."
"Definitely, definitely. Might we recommend one of the various attractions at the Mystery Fair?" Mabel said, holding out 2 tickets to Blendin.
"You know what? What the heck! I'm worth it! But I've got my eye on you! Ehh... ehhh..." He said running off.
They followed him and grabbed the belt from under Soos nose while Blendin was distracted and ran back to the Mystery Shack. Dipper, 3, Mabel, and much to 3's ire, Waddles was sitting at the table looking at the Time Machine.
"Here it is, Mabel. Our ticket to any moment in history." Yeah…
"Let's go get two dodos and force them to make out!" How about no…We could always see my Father, but that could create a paradox where he hides me somewhere Dipper would never find me.
"No! We gotta be smart about this. All that paradox's talk kind of freaked me out. All I'm gonna do is go back and fix my one mistake. If I don't miss that baseball throw, I won't hit Wendy in the eye, and Robbie won't comfort her, and they won't start going out."
"I'm coming, too! I wanna relive the greatest moment in my life: winning Waddles." She then kisses Waddles.
"See you later."
"See you earlier!" Mabel told Waddles, laughing.
They then reappear in same spot, with Dipper's hat on fire which he quickly put out. They grin at each other and heard Stan once again announcing that the Dunk Tank is open.
"Do-over?" Dipper asked, grinning.
"Do over!"
Dipper soon catches up with Wendy and called out, "Hey, Wendy!"
"There you are. Hey, what happened to your hat?" Pointing at his singed hat.
"Uh, nothing. Hey, look! What's that?" Pointing at the carnival stand, Dipper redid the game and to Dipper's and 3's surprise, it repeated exactly, even though he knocked over the bottles. "That's so weird..."
Wendy hooked up with Robbie again and Dipper met back up with Mabel.
"The exact same thing happened twice; it was spooky."
"You're telling me."
"Oh, maybe it's a time-curse. Waddles, can you say "time-curse"?" Mabel said as Waddles oinked.
"Your face is so fat!" Mabel squealed.
"It is possible that the forces of time naturally conspire to undo any new outcomes? No, I just need to try again. Third time's the charm!"
"Maybe the variables are off?"
"How hard could it be?"
Dipper and Mabel retried 3 more times and no matter how hard he'd tried, he couldn't win without hitting Wendy.
"Dipper, maybe we should abandon the puck, pack, dunda and do something other than try to win the doll?" 3 asked logically, fed up with the attempts.
"Yeah, you're right."
He asked, "Wendy, how badly do you want that stuffed animal thing?"
"More than anything in the world, Dipper." It's just a badly made doll! 3 groused, annoyed by Wendy forcing Dipper doing all of this for her.
"Okay..." He tried again and broke open a bag off balls that spitted on Wendy.
Robbie appeared from under the stand helped her up and shook his head at Dipper.
Mabel, 3, and Dipper are waiting near a popcorn machine. Dipper is writing on it, trying to figure out the dynamics of winning without hurting Wendy.
"...I just thought the wind speed…factoring cotton candy..." 3 watched him worried; he was becoming obsessed with winning the stupid thing and could end up hurting himself for a girl who didn't even notice him. Now I know how all those boy's feel in Mabel's Rom-Com's.
"Face it, Dipper, you're obviously fated to have a bad day at the fair, just like I'm fated to be with Waddles. She said knitting a sweater with Waddles on it, much to 3's disgust. No need to rub it in.
"Like there's variable missing..."
"What's a variable?" Mabel asked from behind the popcorn machine.
"That's it! I've figured out to win the toss, not hit Wendy, and stop Wendy and Robbie from going out!'
"Great! I'm gonna go win my pig again." She started to walk off, but Dipper stopped her.
"Whoa whoa whoa, you can't leave; I need you for my plan!"
"But what about Waddles?" Your dumb pig can stand waiting a few more minutes for you. Besides, you promised to help him before you met Waddles-the-book-eater.
"It'll just take a few minutes, let's go!"
They go meet Wendy and Dipper checked the wind speed to trigger his plan.
"Are you gonna go, man?"
"And a-one and a-two and a-uh!" He threw the ball straight up as Wendy sighed in disappointment.
"Ah! Dude! You missed!"
"Did I?" The ball came back behind them as they both ducked and Dipper finally won the puck.
"Your stuffed creature of indeterminate species, miss." The carnies said giving Wendy Duck-panda.
"Oh, awesome!" Wendy exclaimed squeezing the dunda as Dipper catches the ball with his hat.
"Congrats!" 3 called out, causing Wendy and Robbie, who just arrived, to look around.
"There you are, Wendy!"
"Hey, Robbie."
Robbie asked, "So I was wondering if I…You a..."
"Look what Dipper got for me!" Wendy said interrupting him.
Robbie looked crushed and said, "Pfft. Whatever. Can't even tell what species it is. Stupid." He pulls hood over face and walks away. I'm suddenly reminded of Sweater Town.
"What's his deal? Looks like I came to the fair with the right guy." Wendy smiled, patting Dipper on the shoulder as a carnie yelled out.
"We have a winner!" 3 was happy for Dipper, but something deep inside of its conscious stirred in anger. Dipper and Wendy rode in the corndog of love and 3 heard a scream that sounded like Mabel echo throughout the area.
"That was even more awesome the third time around! Funnel cake! Let's go get some, Dipper!" Wendy then run off as Mabel ran over, screaming.
"What's-" Dipper tried to ask, but was cut off by Mabel's screaming until it snapped 3's worn temper
"SHUT UP!"
This snapped Mabel out of it and Dipper quickly asked his sister before she could question the disembodied voice, "What's wrong?"
"We messed up the timeline! Pacifica saw the flyer and won Waddles before I did! She TOOK Waddles, Dipper!"
"Oh, Mabel, I'm sorry."
"It's okay. We just need to go back and do things differently." Mabel snatched the time machine.
"Mabel! Wait. Look. I did the math. In any other timeline, Wendy ends up going out with Robbie. I can't mess up this day again!" 3 agreed; Let Dipper have his time with Wendy.
"But if we don't go, I'll lose Waddles forever!" They wrestle for the time machine and a car comes by and stretches it out then let go, sending Dipper, 3, and Mabel back in time and on their faces.
"When are we? "
"The real question is: when are we? Oh wait, did you already-" Mabel said confused.
"Yeah, I already-"
"Alright."
"It's the same thing. Do hear that?"
A stampede of Buffalo suddenly comes out and they started running, they ran off the cliff and landed on some flour in a covered wagon. Did we go back to Pioneer Day?
A settler called out, "Be on the lookout for mountain lions, travelers!"
"Dysentery! Who wants dysentery?"
"Forge ahead, mighty oxen, for a new life awaits us on this... Oregon trail."
"Where are we? The 70s?" Mabel asked.
"You sent us back 150 years, genius, its pioneer times!"
"By, Trembley! Fertilia, it seems you've given birth to two more children!" The settler said, looking at pregnant woman, surrounded by children of various ages.
"It appears I have. More little hands to render the tallow."
"Tallow? What?" Mabel asked, revealing her braces. To make candles.
A boy noticed and called out, "Her mouth is filled with silver, mother!"
"These are called braces."
"Mabel, we can't start messing with the past!" I agree! You could end up never being born!
"Oh, said the guy who messed with the past all day and cost me my pig?" It's just a stupid pig that'll just eat me, you selfish little girl. Besides, we wouldn't even have a problem if you kept your promise in the first place! 3 said, defending Dipper.
Mabel grabbed the calculator and held it up, "I'll mess with the past all I want! Check it out! A magic button machine! Shoes that blink!" She stomps on the floor and her shoes light up, much to the delight of the pioneers.
"Hey, sister! Guess who gets to vote in the future! Ladies! Up top!" She gives the woman a high five. "That's called a high five! Teach it to your friends!"
Dipper takes time machine from her, "Give me that! I'm gonna set the timeline right!" He pulled the tape and he and Mabel disappear. They appear in front of a large carnivorous dinosaur. Oh Shit.
Dipper presses buttons and they disappeared.
They appeared in a war torn area, everything is in ruins and there are two moons. One person noticed them and screamed.
"Run! Run!"
"IT'S COMING!"
A giant baby floats over with the same symbol on its forehead as the Time Machine and destroyed a building with lasers from its eyes.
"This future seems neat!" Mabel said in a chipper voice. What the Hell is wrong with you!?
Dipper takes time machine and presses buttons frantically.
They appear at the Gravity Falls Lake. I remember this, this is the day the crazy old man chased us with a machine!
"I'M COMING, WADDLES!" She ran off with Dipper chasing after her, dropping the calculator
Old Man McGucket was yelling, "I SEEN IT! I SEEN IT AGAIN! I remember this, this is the day the crazy old man chased us with a machine!
They are at the unveiling of Wax Stan as Stan was saying, "But enough about me behold: ME!"
Dipper tripped over wire and loses his shoe.
They then appear the day 3 and Dipper met, with the gnomes are cornering the golf cart. Mabel's flower pin flies out of her hair.
They appear again in the same spot years ago, but this time it is snowing.
Mabel started to juggle the machine, "This thing is getting hotter! HOT! HOTHOTHOT!" YOU'VE OVER USED IT!
"What did you do?!"
"I DON'T KNOW!" They traveled again and appeared in complete darkness.
"Where are we?" Mabel asked.
"There's nothing but inky blackness for miles! Mabel, don't you see? We've transported to the end of time!" Shouldn't there be a street lamp and an old man with a bucket?
They began screaming
"AAAGH! Wait, why does it smell so bad in here?" Mabel asked then found a door and opens it. They are in the portable toilet at the Mystery Fair, "Look, we're back in the present!"
"But which present?"
"This is the best present ever!" Wendy said celebrated as Waddles tried to escape Pacifica
"NO!" She chases Dipper," Gimme that thing! Dipper give it back!"
Dipper climbed to top of portable toilet and desperately said, "Look, Mabel, it's over! Okay? Give it up! I've worked too hard to lose this!" Stop being selfish, your brother deserves some happiness after the day he's gone through, no thanks to you. 3 said annoyed.
"But what about Waddles? He was my soul mate!" Mabel begged. It's a pig!
"You said that about a ball of yarn once! Do you really want Wendy to date Robbie?"
"I don't know..." She said with tears pricking at her eyes and starts to hit her head against the totem pole.
"You're not guilt-tripping me, Mabel. Not this time." He said as she banged her head against the wood.
"Come on, Mabel, I know you. You're gonna forget about this in a day!" He takes the time machine out of his pocket, "Here! Hey! I'll prove it!"
He went forward a day, "See?" Mabel is still hitting her head on the pole, "Okay, maybe you'll forget in a week..." She was still doing it. "A month! She'll better in a month!"
Vines growing on her legs, "Waddles...Waddles..."
Soos soon came by, leading a tour, "...And when you look at you're left, you'll see Miserable Mabel: a girl who went bonkers after her dreams were shattered by some heartless jerk. Oh, hey, Dipper!"
"That's nice! Mabel is just being a selfish brat who can't handle losing to her brother!" 3 screamed in anger.
Dipper sighed, "3, it's okay…I guess this just means Wendy and Robbie are supposed to be together."
"But Dipper, you tried so hard! Maybe, Mabel will get over that farm yard scourge in a year; just lead a cute boy towards her."
Dipper smiled sadly, "I can't, and I can't stand to see Mabel so miserable. If Waddles makes her happy, then she should have him. Who knows, maybe Wendy and Robbie will break up sometime in the future." He held up the time machine.
3 sighed, "If you think it's for the best, I think I can handle another one of those farm animals in our room. But the moment he starts sniffing me with a gleam in those eyes, I'm learning how to make pork roast with no hands." 3 gave in.
He goes back to the ball stand where Wendy was saying, "I don't know if it's a duck or a panda, but I want one!"
Dipper sighed and reluctantly said, "Wendy, I just wanted to say that, well I just wanted say that people makes mistakes. And when they do, you should forgive them. And also that tight pants are overrated."
"Dude, you lost me."
"I know. One ball, please."
"You only get one chance."
"And a-one and a-two and a-huh!" He threw the ball, hits Wendy.
Robbie comes up on time and says, "Hey, Wendy are you okay? You know this is the perfect time for me to ah... ask you something…"
"It is done." Mabel then tackled Dipper to the ground, shouting.
"DIPPER! THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!" She lifts up Dipper. Happy you got your way, 3 commented scathingly. Waddles oinked.
"He's saying thank you in Pig! Aren't you, Waddles?" He just continued to oink as Pacifica was pecked by a chicken.
"I couldn't break your heart, Mabel. Besides, there's no way Wendy can date Robbie all summer, right?"
Blendin suddenly grabs the time machine out of Dipper's hands, "YOU TWO!" Dipper, 3, and Mabel screamed as Waddles squealed.
"Do you have any idea, how many rules you just broke?! I'm asking; I wasn't there with you...it was probably a lot, right?" He asked angrily.
Two futuristic cops appeared on either side of Blendin. "Blendin Blandin…"
"AAAAGH! The Time Paradox Avoidment Enforcement Squadron!"
The other cop continued, "That's right, and our phones have been ringing off the hook! There are settler's high-fiving in the 1800's and calculators littered through eight centuries!" Way to go Mabel.
"You're under arrest for violation of the Time Traveler's Code of Conduct." Blendin was handcuffed him and was led away.
"It was those kids! And their leader, Waddles!" How desperate are you to blame an animal.
"That's a pig, Blendin." One cop scoffed.
"I'll get you for this! I'll go back in time and make sure your parents never MEET!" That doesn't sound good.
"Well, we're still here."
"Guess he forgot to go back."
The cops passed by Stan who was taunting the tourists, he then called out to the cops who responded by firing a laser at the target, causing him to fall into the tank.
"So I guess we never found out who was causing those time anomalies Blendin was looking for." Mabel said as the twins ate snow cones.
"Wait, Mabel; I think it was us." I think you're right.
"Ugh, my brain hurts."
"Oh, geez, I gotta deal with this all summer?" Dipper said, pointing at Robbie hamming it up to Wendy with a caramel apple.
Mabel then smiled and pointed to the apple, Waddles charged at Robbie causing him to run and drop the apple. He crashed into a bucket of hot water causing his pants to shrink.
"My pants! They're shrinking!" This caused everyone to laugh at him as Wendy covered her face laughing.
"Oh man."
Dipper looks at Waddles and said, "That'll do pig, that'll do." I think we'll get along fine, Farmyard scor- I mean Waddles.
The twins walked away and Mabel said, "You know Dipper, for a while now I've been hearing a disembodied voice nearby." 3 and Dipper gulped nervously and said, "O-oh yeah? Weird, I hadn't noticed."
"Maybe we can go on a mystery hunt and solve it! Isn't that right Waddles?" She walked away.
"3, maybe we should let Mabel in on the secret."
"I think you're right…"
A/N: Well it's done. Waddles is in the picture. After this I'll start playing with canon. That means I'll either switch or skip over some episodes and change them to my liking. Stay tuned.