Chapter Ten
In All My Dreams I Drown
Devil's Carnival
This time Reid and Riley were able to watch as Candace and Tucker dragged in the next woman, still drugged, and straps her to the chair. The brighter lights turned on again and it took a moment for their eyes to adjust but right before the lights, Reid caught a glimpse of stairs through the door as it closed. Good, now he was sure they were in a storm shelter.
"Alright, let's try this again." Tucker rolled his sleeves up as he had done the last time. Candace stood stony faced with a gun to the other woman's head. This lady was Asian, very pretty, and young. Maybe in her early twenties and from what he could guess, this woman was homeless. Her face was dirty and her clothes were torn and a little too small for her. Riley wondered if the girl was a runaway. Reid swallowed hard with the knowledge that her life was in his hands. It didn't matter that she may not have a family, she was still a human and he didn't want another innocent person to die because he couldn't do what he needed to do to save them. "Put your hands on the wall."
"The wall?" Reid questioned, not sure if he had faded out of reality and missed the first part of that sentence.
"I said, put your hands on the wall. Both of you, get over there now. Face the wall and put your hands where I can see them. One move and the woman dies." Tucker was already sounding like his patience was waning. Riley looked to Reid for confirmation and he gave her a faint nod. The pair stepped to the far side of the room and placed their hands on the wall. Reid kept the eye contact of his female companion, knowing she was growing more and more uneasy as the moments passed. His own stomach was in knots now but he resisted grabbing her hand.
They could hear the door open and Riley jumped when it slammed closed. Tucker was getting closed and Reid swallowed hard as he thought of the words to say. "I'm ready to learn now. But this woman…she isn't who I want." Reid said, licking his lips after he spoke. Tucker stopped and when Reid was convinced that the unsub was listening, he continued. "There… there's another woman I would rather have. I've been seeing her behind Riley's back for a while now. Get her and let Riley go and I'll learn everything you can teach me about how to put her in her place."
Before Reid could get any further Tucker grabbed him by the back of his shirt and flung him to the floor. It knocked the breath out of Reid and he drew in a ragged breath as Tucker came to loom over him. "Dammit boy. You just don't get it. All women are yours to take. If you want one, take her. I don't give a shit if you've been seein' some other woman behind that tramps back." He pointed a thick finger at Riley who had backed up to the side of the dresser. "You say you wanna learn to put them in their place? Well I'm about to teach you by example. A meaty hand grabbed a handful of Reid's hair and pulled him up on his knees. The other fist made contact to the left side of Reid's face and stars lit up his vision.
The blurry figure of Riley jumped on the bed and then down on the other side. She was distancing herself. Reid just kept telling himself he could handle it, hoping the beating would stall everything enough that Reid would have time to learn more about their captors and hopefully get an idea of how to escape.
The blows just kept coming, one after the other, and all Reid could do was cover his face and take it. A kick to the head almost blacked him out but he held on. Through the smashing sounds of Tucker's hands hitting him, Reid could swear that he heard Riley yelling and then everything stopped with the sound of shattering glass. A few pieces hit the floor by Reid's head, he could hear them skittering across the floor.
When Reid looked up, Tucker's face was red with rage and Riley was standing on the bed, brandishing what was left of the shattered lamp from the bedside table. Reid's eyes went wide in shock as Riley's words broke through the fog.
"Leave him alone!" She yelled as Tucker faced her. She was shaking with fear but still she stayed defiant, staring Tucker in the eye but before she could react, his hand swung hard and with a nasty backhand, Riley fell to the floor. Tucker snatched the lamp off the floor and with one move he ripped the cord out and hit Riley with it a couple of times before he left her whimpering on the floor. Reid backed away instinctively as Tucker approached. The larger man leaned over and grabbed a handful of Reid's shirt and pulled him up close.
"Women are not our equals boy. They were put on this earth to serve us, just like dogs serve their master, and cows provide food." He snarled in Reid's face, shaking him a little as he spoke. "You will train this one. You'll teach that little bitch to serve you and respect all men she comes in contact with." He pushed Reid as he released him and walked back over to Riley. "You will obey him, you will obey me." He kicked her over onto her back so she could look at him. "Come here boy."
Reid stood shakily, pain shot through him from his fresh bruises. Bracing himself on a wall for a moment, he knew what he was about to have to do. A voice in his head told him that nothing he could do to Riley would be as bad as what Tucker was doing, but still he couldn't rationalize it in his mind. He felt sick with himself. He swallowed the lump in his throat as Tucker pointed to Riley. "Hit her."
"I don't think I'm ready. Why don't…why don't you show me again." In a flash he was back in front of that computer screen with a paper in his hand; 'Me for her'. In essence that was what he wanted. Anything to not have to hit Riley. It simply wasn't in him. His eyes were locked with Tuckers but he could see Riley shaking her head in protest. She had lashed out and attacked this man twice her size to protect Reid and Reid felt he couldn't do anything but just stand there.
"You aren't stupid boy. I already showed you and you damn well know I taught you well enough. Get over here and hit her or I'll do it myself." Tucker growled. His patience was wearing thin. Reid came to a terrifying realization that he had no more options. Tucker wouldn't be persuaded to let Riley go and he certainly wasn't stupid enough to beat Reid again. He knew the younger man was just stalling.
Tucker stepped back away from Reid as he approached Riley. For a moment Reid considered going after Tucker in that instant but he knew that he and Riley couldn't take down the larger man with brute force. With a thud his knees hit the floor beside Riley. His heart was beating loudly in his ears and his throat stung but he couldn't allow himself to cry.
"Do it Reid, it's ok." Riley whispered, barely loud enough for Reid to hear. Shaking hands covered her face as he raised his hand. He was trembling as he had been the first time he raised a hand to her. It was like sitting on the rail of a bridge, looking down and knowing that you have to let go. That first step was always the hardest and in this case, Reid felt it might be impossible. "Do it." She said again and Reid swung down, eyes closed tight. He felt the contact but it almost didn't seem real. After a few more trembling blows, Tucker knew that Reid was taking it easy on Riley.
In a fit of rage, the large man grabbed Reid by the back of his collar and pulled him away. Reid was flung back onto the hardwood floor and before he could react, the heel of Tucker's boot made contact with Riley's ribcage. The sound she emitted was one that Reid had never heard come from a human before and one that he hoped he would never hear it again.
"Stop. Stop!" He protested, hands out in a pleading gesture. Tucker stopped and turned to Reid. "She's mine right? Then I should be the one to do it." He would never hurt her like Tucker was. She would be lucky if her ribs were still intact after that last blow and he knew that if he did it himself, he would be keeping her safe. Maybe it was his brain finally breaking down but he could have sworn that she looked relieved that it would be him instead of the unsub. Whether she was relieved or not, he still couldn't watch. Eyes shut tight he hit her, over and over until he heard Tucker speak.
"We're getting somewhere. Good job boy. There might be some promise for you yet." Then the door slammed shut. As soon as the overhead light went out and they were plunged back into the dim light of the remaining bedside lamp, Reid's hand fell to the floor beside Riley's head. He leaned over her, on the verge of sobbing, his breathing vast and irregular. He could hear as the woman on the other side of the glass was taken away, drugged but still very much alive. Where were they keeping her? Reid wasn't sure but it was not his first priority right now.
With some difficulty, the young FBI agent helped his battered friend to the bed. She took a few deep breaths as he sat down beside her. Her skin had grown pale and her forehead was dotted with sweat. "I'm so sorry Riley. I …I didn't know what else to do."
"It's ok Spencer. You weren't as bad as him. I think he cracked my rib." Her hand pressed to her side as she spoke in ragged gasps. After a few moments of silence she had calmed down and her color was coming back. As well as a dark purple bruise over her left eye. Thin trails of blood dotted the side of her gown and Reid was sure that it was worse on her back. The cord from the lamp had obviously done its part and it made Reid sick. "Are you ok?" She whispered, blue eyes searching his face.
"Why did you do that?" He asked, brow furrowed. "Why did you attack him like that?"
"He was hurting you. I don't know I just reacted." She shrugged, sitting up and propping against the pillows. Everything hurt, from her face to her feet, everything felt as if it was bruised.
"You helped me and I…"Reid covered his face with his hand and shook his head. She risked it to help him and he hurt her in return.
"Stop it Spencer." He felt her warm fingers pull his hand away from his face so he would look at her. "You saved that woman. I know they won't release her but she is still alive and that is what matters. Besides…that guy doesn't hold back. You know that. I would rather it be you than him."
They sat in silence for a moment when Riley brushed her knuckles across Reid's cheek. He flinched a little but he refused to look at her. "He got you worse than I thought. You're bleeding." She ripped the hem from her gown and dabbed his cheek with it. "Thank you Spencer."
"Thank you? I hit you Palmer. There's nothing to be thankful for."
For the first time during this whole ordeal, he called her by her last name. Her hand stopped moving, her eyes boring into him. This was what the unsub wanted. To make Reid distance himself from Riley and she just couldn't let that happen.
"Don't do that Spencer. Don't distance yourself from me. He wants to separate us. I don't want to go through this alone and if you allow him to put a wedge between us, you'll be my enemy. I don't want you to be my enemy." He still wasn't really responding so she tried something else. "Why don't we think about what else we've learned from them?"
"I don't know. I had my eyes closed." Reid rubbed his eyes and tried to remember anything he could. "The woman…she was homeless I think. She was dirty and her clothes didn't fit right."
"So he may not have gone far to get her. Maybe a nearby city?"
Reid shook his head a little as he thought. "I don't think so. The unsub would want to keep us isolated and chances are, they would have to get a permit to have an underground bunker in their back yard. Most cities won't allow that so I'm sure we're outside city limits."
"A smaller town would notice if anyone went missing, even a homeless person. So what other options do they have? If we aren't inside city limits, and a small town would be too suspicious, where else could they go for a homeless person?"
"What if they took her from the side of the road? If we are out in the middle of nowhere, it would be really easy to pick up a hitch hiker. And there are plenty of prostitutes that stay around truck stops, he could be taking them and the victims would be almost impossible to track. No one to notice they are even missing. I think I know where we are. Or, pretty close anyway."
"Really? Well don't keep it to yourself, share with the class." She jibed as she readjusted on the bed. Her ribs hurt like hell but Riley did her best to keep it in. She really didn't want Reid to feel any worse about the situation than he already did.
"When the initial victims were taken, an unrelated woman was usually taken from her home. The unsubs have to be stalking these people so some degree or they would have been caught by now. They know what their victims do and where they go and are taking them from places close to their homes. The victims comfort zones. But the extra women have all gone missing from around the same area. They've all been within a 1200 mile diameter with the center being about…."His fingers tapped the air and his eyes darted around at an invisible map as his lips mouthed the names of the places the other women were taken from. "Somewhere in Nebraska. Possibly the north eastern section? I didn't make the connection before because it's such a wide range and covers multiple states."
"That would explain a lot. We're almost literally in the middle of nowhere. Far enough away from cities to be able to have an underground bunker, close enough to truck stops to have a good supply of hitch hikers and prostitutes, and in a central part of the US that would allow for a wide kidnapping range. I just hope the rest of the team can figure that out before…" Her words trailed off into territory she just didn't want to explore.
"We're going to get out of this ok?" Reid took her hand and squeezed it. Deep down he wasn't sure himself if they could get out. It was locked down tight and the unsubs took great measures to ensure they were careful about where their victims were when they entered or exited the bunker. If only he had some way to contact the team their chances would be better.
"Yeah…." She didn't seem convinced.
"Riley, I know you don't really know me very well, but please trust me." He forced her to meet his gaze and after a moment, she nodded. There may have been a part of her that still doubted him, but at least she was making an effort to trust him.
The sudden clanking of the food slot door startled them both. Once it closed, they could hear faint footsteps ascending the stairs, then silence. If the door wasn't so thick, they could probably tell about how far underground they were. Not that Reid thought it would do much good. Digging out was an option he had crossed off the list for various reasons.
Reid and Riley didn't realize they were holding their breaths until they both exhaled sharply. Their shoulders drooped as they shared a look of relief. Reid rose to examine the meal. Soup, salad, and meatloaf for him, same turkey sandwich, crackers, and water for her. He began to divide up the food when Riley stopped him.
"Wait." Riley struggled to get out of bed but once she was on her feet she had to stop and catch her breath. Once most of the pain subsided, she slowly made her way to Reid. His eyes were so sad, pleading for her to stay in bed but Riley ignored the look. "Meatloaf, soup, salad….it must be lunch."
Reid's face morphed from worried to perplexed. He simply didn't catch on to where Riley was going with her statement. So she continued.
"Our first meal after our abduction was steak and potatoes. Second was eggs and bacon. I really don't know how I didn't see it before. This gives us a rough idea as to what the time and day it is."
It all came together for Reid. "If we're in Nebraska, like I think we are…" he tapped the air with his fingers, calculating in his head. "It took approximately fourteen hours to get here from the abduction point. Three pm…fourteen hours…figure in the time change…we arrived here at six am. If our first meal was dinner, then something happened. The unsub said, 'we start in the morning'. That could mean any time before noon, but we didn't wake up until before dinner."
"You mean, they kept us drugged all say? Why keep us sedated that long?"
"I don't know." Reid shrugged. "Maybe they were trying to decide whether to keep us or not."
"If we knew why the unsubs chose those specific victims, it would be easier to figure out. But nothing seemed to match up. Age, gender, race…"Riley took a seat to think, careful of her ribs.
"What about jobs?" Reid pondered. "They all lived too far apart for there to be any personal connections between them. But maybe there's something in their careers that link them."
"Not that I can think of. They were all pretty diverse. A musician, a lawyer, a writer…" Riley sighed as she tried to recall the case files she had spent so long preparing. Still, nothing seemed to click.
"Those are pretty interesting occupations. Not just everyday jobs. They produce all types of people. The unsub wants to find someone who he can train to be like him. It seems like he wants his message to be taught all over the world. He seems to want every last man to believe like he believes. Going back to our suspicions of an internet following, I remember seeing something in the case file of the first victims about a video online but it was very vague."
"Yeah, there was a video livestreamed online of the first couple online the first Friday after they were abducted but the link was closed before anyone could track it. No one in my department had the skills that were required to prove it ever existed so I had to write it as speculated evidence. No other video ever surfaced but we assumed the unsub made one for every couple he kidnapped."
"Today is Thursday." Reid felt sick as his eyes met Riley's. "We can assume he has hosted a livestream for each couple…"
"We'll be next."
"It's ok." Reid knelt beside her and took her hand gently. When she looked at him, he would hold her gaze as he spoke, thinking in the back of her head about how beautiful her eyes were. "Garcia is the best. She read the files, I'm sure she's already found the source of the video by now. We'll just have to wait it out and hope they made the same connections we did. Assuming they don't get here before the video is aired, we'll have to think about what we'll say, or more, what I'll say to tip them off on our location. That's how they found me when I was abducted by Tobias. I can do it this time too."
"I hope so. I just hope that you can figure out a way to get our location across to the others. Guess it wouldn't do much good to hope they get here before the video airs would it?" Riley tried to force a smile but she simply couldn't keep it up.
"We're going to get out of here, I promise." Reid divided up the food and handed her a plate. For the longest time she just stared at it. "Eat. We'll both need our strength tonight if the others haven't found us by then. "Reid knew that their time was winding down quickly. They had only about thirty hours before the unsub would livestream them as he had done the other before them. Reid really didn't want his team to see him hit Riley. He hated that he had to hurt her, but it also hurt him to think of how his team would look at him once he and Riley were rescued. If they were ever rescued. Reid promised Riley that they would get out of here but he wasn't even sure himself that they would survive. He wasn't sure she believed him, but he had to give her hope or she might give up.
"You said that he might be taking people of certain occupations right? I hate to shoot that idea down but the unsub doesn't know what we do. Actually, I don't recall him ever asking you what you do for a living." Riley took a tentative bite of her half of the sandwich.
"Hm. You're right. He never asked and we both know we didn't have our credentials on us. Just my gun and cell phone but it didn't have any personal information on it. Nothing he could look at and know what I do."
The pair ate in silence and the quiet remained for a while after. Riley shook her head. Neither of them could make a definite connection but one thing was for sure, if the unsub knew they were FBI he may have disposed of them sooner. But what was the connection? I really can't think of any reason they would have chosen us." Riley said, and then paused. "It had been speculated that the unsubs were watching their victims before abducting them. Nothing was ever confirmed though since the victims were never taken from their homes. If the unsubs do have specific people they are after and the connection lies in their jobs, maybe they took us by mistake? We weren't in town long enough for them to have stalked us. It all seems too random."
Reid thought, turning the idea over in his head. Many of the specifics for victims didn't match. They had already ruled out age, race, gender, and personal connection but the potential for a job connection was not something he was willing to cross off his list until he was sure.
"Why don't we try a cognitive interview?" Reid suggested. "I know what I remember from when we were taken, but maybe there was something you saw or heard that I didn't. Are you feeling up to that?" He knew that she was in pain and he didn't want to do anything that would cause her more discomfort or stress. When she nodded he turned to face her, placing one knee on the bed, his shin pressed against her crossed legs. "Okay, we're going to start in the van, right before we got out at the gas station. We'll end at what you remember when you woke up in this room." The part where they were in transit was the part he was worried about making her recall. Her panic was so intense before that she could panic again and end up hurting herself. "I want you to take my hand and try to stay calm while you answer my questions ok? I'm right here."
With a deep breath, Riley took Reid's hand, taking a mental note of its warmth, just like when she first met him and shook his hand. It was only yesterday but it felt like a lifetime ago.
"Alright, close your eyes and relax." He placed his other hand around hers, hoping it would soothe her, while also bringing him a strange sense of peace. He licked his lips, only just realizing how dry they were. "We're in the van. What do you hear? What do you smell?"
"I hear…everyone talking. Beyond that there's the clanking of metal on glass. Morgan isn't wearing his seatbelt. I can hear cars passing by. I smell after shave and cologne…and the scented tree handing from the mirror. It's actually sort of strong. But Rossi had his window down so that helped. I could feel the wind a little."
"Good. You're doing great. Now, the vehicle stops. What do you see now?" Reid calmly directed her to the next scene, keeping his voice soft and focused.
"Hotch, Rossi, and J.J. went ahead of us. You, Morgan, and I stepped out to stretch. Morgan was slightly ahead of us and we were talking about Doctor Who. The gas station was busy and sort of loud. I almost bumped into a woman when she and a man walked out in front of us. That's when the female unsub got our attention." Her brow furrowed with confusion as she remembered the encounter. "She looked past us."
"What?" Now Reid was confused too. He hadn't been looking at the woman as he turned. He had looked at Riley. Morgan and Riley heard the woman and turned first so Reid must have missed what Riley was remembering.
"Yeah, she spoke when we turned around and tried to look around us. Then she put her attention on us and asked for our help. What if she was trying to speak to the couple I almost bumped into? They were directly in front of us." Riley opened her eyes but Reid slipped his hand over her face to close them again.
"We'll go over that in a minute. Right now I need you to focus. What happened next?"
Riley reluctantly closed her eyes and inhaled deeply to focus her mind again. The memory faded back in from the darkness.
"She said she had a flat tire and we went to help her. I can hear gravel crunching under our feet, but none of us said much. We walked up to the truck….you went around back and when I leaned over the seat, the woman jumped on me and wrapped her arms around my neck. She shoved a rag in my face and I kept telling myself not to breathe in but I couldn't help it. I was wondering where you were, why you weren't helping me. Then I realized something was happening to you and…." Riley shook her head, the memory taking her back to the rush and confusion, Reid's hand tightened around hers. "Everything went black."
"You woke up on the way. Do you remember?" This was the part of Reid had been bracing himself for?
"Everything was dark. When I first came to, I couldn't move and I panicked. My arms are trapped. There's something heavy on my and it's so hot. I smell oil and gasoline. My heart was beating so fast. I couldn't see you or hear you and I was calling for you but you didn't answer." Tears streaked her face as her hand gripped his tightly. "I was being too loud. The woman pulled the truck over and I think the man must have pulled up behind us in the semi because I remember seeing a bright light through a crack near my feet, then it was gone. I can't tell if I'm hearing the diesel engine or if it's the ringing in my ears. I can hear him. He's walking up to the truck and I heard him say something to the woman."
"What did he say?" Reid licked his lips again, listening intently.
"He…he wants to kill me. Reid, he's coming." Her hands were shaking in Reid's grip.
"It's ok, I'm here Riley. It's not real, it's just a memory. Just relax and try to remember what he said." He made an attempt at calming her down. A moment passed in silence as she composed herself.
"I'm being too loud. Candace…I think that's what he said….the woman. Candace made a mistake. That's what he said. They walked to the cab of the truck and then I couldn't hear what they were saying anymore. The heat, the hallucinations, the feeling of being restrained…I started thrashing around, trying to get free when I felt your hand and heard your voice. They sedated us again didn't then? They must have. I felt a needle in my arm before everything faded out again. That's all I can remember before I woke up in here." Riley didn't want to tell him exactly how much she felt like she needed his voice or his touch in that moment. Anything to not feel so alone in her panic. Her azure eyes opened but she didn't want to look at him just yet, maybe she was embarrassed at needing him. Maybe she just didn't want him to see through her.
They sat in silence, piecing together the puzzle when Reid realized her was not only holding her hand, but stroking her knuckles unconsciously as he thought. The palm of his hand still tingled with her warmth but instead of facing her, facing the feeling, he started to pace, recalling his observations.
"They made a mistake. The couple that walked out in front of us was who they were after, but when we turned around she had to think fast and decided to take us instead. Then again, I don't think it would have mattered much to her if Morgan would have come instead of me. If you had been with Morgan, this whole thing probably would have been avoided."
"I'm glad it was you." Riley chuckled and shrugged, her smile quickly turning to embarrassment when he glanced at her. "I mean….Morgan is ok but I just…I don't really have much in common with him and if I was going to be locked away for hours on end in need of a conversation, I don't think Morgan would be the one I'd want to try to chat it up. Besides, I like uh…" Her voice tapered off as she looked at him, losing any courage she may have just had and rerouted it to energy to pick at her fingernails. Luckily for her he didn't seem to have caught on to what she had said. Sometimes he was so clueless it was sort of entertaining.
When he couldn't make sense of it he began to pace again. Riley readjusted herself on the pillows. She watched Reid from her peripheral vision as he paced across the floor, biting his thumbnail as he did. His external peril was obvious, but paled in comparison to the storm that raged in his mind.
Internally he was wrestling with himself. On the one hand, Reid hated hitting Riley and wasn't sure he could make himself do it again. Knowing he may have to do it again only made it worse. On the other hand, he saw how hard the unsub laid into Riley and Reid knew he would never hit her nearly that hard. He had to pick the lesser of two evils while trying to keep himself together for Riley's sake. This was simply too much for him to handle all at once.
Frankly, he was doing a terrible job at keeping Riley calm. His pacing was making her nervous and she wished they had something to talk about. The situation was far too stressful to even think about light conversation. Still, she had to do something so stop his infernal pacing. She just couldn't handle it anymore.
"You're still a good person Reid." Sure, it was a stab in the dark but if she was in his shoes she would be seriously questioning herself right now.
Reid stopped and looked at her. The surprise on his face said it all, but he didn't open his mouth to speak. Who was the profiler now?
"Don't be so hard on yourself. I don't envy you. I would hate to be in your shoes right now, but I want you to know that no matter what happens, I don't hold anything against you. Come over here and quit pacing. You're making me nervous." Riley carefully pulled her legs away from the end of the bed and waiting for him to sit. "You're so sweet, I don't know why I was so intimidated by you before."
"Why would you be intimidated?"
"I know that profilers really can't really read minds, but there's something about profilers that make me uneasy. Not a lot of people know me personally and coming into a room with a profiler for the first time was a little nerve-wracking. I was trying so hard to be calm and you say right through me anyway. I would hate to know how much you know about me just from the short time we've known each other."
"We really try not to profile each other or people that we work with from outside sources, but I admit that sometimes we do it unconsciously. I've come to some conclusions about you, but none of it's bad. If anything it's helped me figure out how to handle the situation and even….that I wouldn't mind at all if we keep in touch after this whole ordeal is over."
Riley watched him intently as he spoke; paying close attention to how his mouth moved and how his eyes shifted as he spoke. So much like a man, and yet, so much like a boy. He really was attractive in his own way and she wished she could get inside his mind like he could do to hers.
"I wish I could do what you do." Riley's face for red when she realized that what she thought had blurted out of her mouth. But it was true. She did wish she could do what he did. Have the skills he had. It seemed he could look at her and know what she was thinking if he wanted to.
"Why?" There was that confused look again. Riley just smirked. It was a cute look. In a weird way she liked confusing him. For someone so smart his train sure did derail a lot.
"I don't know, I just…urg, it's too embarrassing." She laughed a sighed, eyeing him closely before she chose to finish her sentence. "Ok we may not get out of here so I'll just say it. Don't laugh but I just wish I knew you better. Could know you better. There's just something about you that I can't quite put my finger on."
Reid looked away, his eyes searching the floor as if the words to say would materialize from the wood grain. Riley's stomach dropped. "That was really weird of me to say, I'm sorry Reid." Damn, she felt so embarrassed now. She was starting to care about him and he probably didn't think he could ever see her as anything more than a friend.
"Spencer." He answered. It was her turn to be confused.
"What?" Riley met his gaze again.
"Call me Spencer." He grinned at her and she couldn't help to smile back.
"Alright…Spencer. Well, since that was embarrassing enough, how about you help me to the shower? I don't have soap and shampoo but if I die here today I want to die clean." Her voice was laced with sarcasm but it still made Reid a little uneasy. He really didn't want to think about her dying. Images of Maeve flashed in his head. Images that only subsided when Riley reached out to him, needing him to help her up.
"Thanks Spencer. I've got it from here." Riley let go of his arm and ran the water in the shower. It didn't take long to get warm but she still didn't waste any time. The hot water felt good on her skin but standing up for too long was causing her more pain that she originally thought it would. When she came back into the main room, Reid was laying on his back on the bed, hands resting on his chest. His eyes were closed which gave Riley a moment to just watch him. He didn't flinch when she lay down beside him, her fingers entwined over her stomach. It was the only way she could lay on her back without her ribs hurting. What an awful time to sleep, and yet her eyes just didn't want to stay open.
"Riley?" Reid's voice was barely over a whisper. He sounded sleepy too.
"Hm?" Riley hummed in reply.
"I'm sorry. For everything."
Riley reached over and grabbed his hand, pulling it to the bed between them. "It's ok Spencer. I forgive you. But…if you're really that tore up about it, you could always buy me dinner when we get out of here." Riley joked, Reid smiled and agreed. Before long, they both drifted off into a calm sleep. Whatever they would face in this hell, they would face together.