Random Trivia: This site only allows 2 tags per story. If I had unlimited tags this trilogy would have been labeled with "Humor, Romance, Drama, Adventure". As if it wasn't obvious already.
Episode 9: Kei
"Very well, if you have prepared yourself I would like to start the lesson." Kei looked at her one and only student with expectant eyes. She stood in front of a holographic projector with the keyboard in reach of her hands.
"Just shoot away!" The red-head gave her the okay.
"This is very exciting." Nepgear said from the bench behind Uzume. She was the only other person attending this private lesson. Whether she was Uzume's moral support or some sort of advisor wasn't quite clear to Kei.
"First I will explain to you the basics of Gamindustri's current political and economical situation then." Kei cleared her throat and began her extensive monologue.
The longer she spoke the more uneasy she got. The reason for that was Uzume's response to her teachings. Her orange eyes were slowly closing more and more. And it seemed like her enthusiasm went into the same bottomless pit that Blanc's patience disappeared to on a regular basis.
Nepgear was listening more intently than the one who was supposed to learn something here…
"Ahem." Kei huffed and clapped her hands loudly, which made Uzume jump. She was actually startled? It was true that a continuous monotonous stream of a professional voice like Kei's could be tiring even to the most eager of listeners. Lastation's former Oracle knew all too well of her own flaws after having to tutor and advise much less patient people over the last year. "Did you get that?" She asked with doubtful eyes.
"Y-yeah, totally. You gotta watch the Share bar on the screen and when things go down the drain, just start some PR event or somethin'." Uzume said with more confidence than such a vague statement deserved.
Kei sighed while Nepgear laughed dryly.
"Do you know what PR even means?" Kei tried to loosen the atmosphere with a joke. It wasn't her métier, but when faced with this 'adversary'…
"'Party Rock' right?" Uzume grinned cheerfully. Not even a hint of irony.
"S-she isn't entirely wrong. Conceptually speaking. I think?" Nepgear raised her hands to calm Kei down before she had a very un-Kei-like breakdown.
Was this really the only hope of Gamindustri? Kei truly felt spoiled now, having worked with Noire for all these years. She had always pitied Histoire for having to deal with Neptune's quirkiness, but at the very least she still had Nepgear as a backup of sorts.
How could one mold that into a passable ruler?
"Let's change our approach for a bit." She wasn't about to give up just yet. Her repertoire had grown significantly, hadn't it? "The public relations office wants to commemorate an upcoming ten year anniversary of your reign." She pulled up three pictures on the holo-projector. "They suggested a giant statue of the CPU as their new symbol of trust. The merchant clientele requests reduction of export taxes. A non-profit organization asks for funds to help build more orphanages. As the CPU you are also allowed to make your own suggestions of course. How would you approach this scenario?"
Multiple choice questions with distinct stakes and solutions were the best way to make a beginner engaged in the topic! It had been proven countless times by statistics. Kei could already see Uzume's eyes light up in excitement.
Nepgear seemed happy as well. She understood Kei's approach. She probably had her own answer to this problem as well, but she wouldn't interfere with Uzume's contemplations.
"That's easy." She rubbed her nose confidently. "Just do 'em all!"
Kei's right eyebrow twitched.
"U-Uzume… That's a little…" Nepgear was sweating more than the one who made the ludicrous suggestion.
"What? She said I can make my own suggestion too. If it's some big anniversary event then we should make everybody happy! Don't you think a statue would be, like, super cool? And building orphanages is even better. I know a lot of kids who would love to have a home and real parents. Nobody likes taxes anyway, so let's give the merchants a share too." She explained her logic with an arm leaned over her chair.
Kei controlled her urge to facepalm. This fledgling CPU…
Of course she wasn't wrong. Kei had given her the option to make her own suggestion. But to think she would try to please every side at once? That was completely unexpected. Someone with restraint and forethought would have known that the budget was limited. There was no way she could make everybody happy. To be honest, she had not expected this choice at all. If she had known then she would have added a monetary factor to the question.
"Uhm, this is really expensive, but I think Uzume's choice is good." Nepgear suddenly raised her hand as if she was in class.
"Are you… certain of that?" Kei looked at the former CPU candidate as if she had lost her mind.
"Yes! Although it would require a lot of money, this anniversary is a really rare event. If she can pull it off then the people will be extremely happy. If she does it during that time where her reign is supposed to be celebrated then the people will definitely think she is a generous person!"
"We could get rid of the statue if it's too expensive. Would be pretty embarrassing to stare at my own stone face every day anyway." Uzume rubbed her head.
The statue was the worst choice by far, but Kei was surprised to hear her let go of that one first. She cupped her chin. Nepgear's words had a grain of truth in them. It was a bold move indeed, but with the right marketing it could be used as a bargaining tool as well.
The correct choice in her eyes would have been a tax reduction. It was only natural for a business minded individual. But now she was not so convinced anymore.
"I understand your way of thinking now." Kei said with closed eyes.
"Huh?"
"Was this a test?" Nepgear blinked.
"Mhm. There was no entirely correct choice here. Each choice would reveal something about the thought process of the questioned person. Their character would come to the forefront if you will." The silver-haired girl extended her hand and gave them a cunning smile. "I admit that I assumed you would choose the statue out of a sense of pride."
"I mean, everyone probably dreamed of that at least once. I ain't saying it's a super good idea." Uzume was fidgeting around.
"A sentimental person would likely have focused on the orphanages and with your background I did also consider that as you preferred choice." Kei shrugged. "Yet somehow you have thwarted all my expectations and not even by making the choice that I would have made."
"You're way smarter than me Kei, so if you would've chosen the taxes I'd have agreed to it too." Uzume admitted. "But if I can do it I want to make everyone happy!"
No matter how feasible her ideal choice was, she had at the very least given it some thought. In a moment of weakness Kei mentally admitted that she quite liked that honest and naïve approach as well. A straightforward ruler like this girl might very well be incredibly popular with the people.
But as a former Oracle and the one who had looked at the yearly balance of the Basilicom's expenses she could only feel bad for Uzume's future staff. As long as she had Nepgear around as a backer she would be someone who was hard to refuse at the very least.
"What would Noire have chosen?" She quietly wondered to herself. Once she had known Noire's calculating way of doing things, but these days? It was a mystery.
A few hours of unrivaled suffering later Kei was finally free to move about the Basilicom. She had drilled as much knowledge and common sense into Uzume's head as she was able in such a short time. The girl was by no means unintelligent; she just had a tendency to approach things too directly. Subtlety was something one had to acquire with experience.
After make a short stop in the kitchen and downing a rejuvenating coffee she decided to check on Histoire. The two oracles were friends after all. A term she used very rarely.
They discussed Uzume's progress and caught up on a few minor events before Histoire politely asked for some time to herself. She was investing as much of her concentration in her data analyses as she could manage.
Knowing that Mina and Chika were busy with their own workload she finally decided to head to Lastation's office. There was nothing else for her to do at this point. According to the watch on the wall it was already past midnight. Uni should have gone to sleep already, so Kei could use that time to review her work.
During her walk through the magnificent hallways she reminisced about the last months. She had been walking halls and fancy rugs for a while already.
Her journey led her to the highest of positions. She was advisor to kings and business magnates alike. In that time she had learned a lot about patience and selfishness. Nobles had a sense of entitlement unlike anything she had encountered in Lastation. Their decisions were unreasonable, their desire unquenchable and the only individuals worse than the foolish players were the shrewd schemers.
"Illogical." Kei had been forced to learn the hard way how to appease these incomprehensible people. Sometimes her life depended on it. Much to her chagrin she had to make deals and engage in trickery to achieve goals for her employers.
These experiences had all given her a new perspective and just instilled a sense of gratitude in her to have worked with girls as competent as Noire and Uni.
She put a hand to her pale forehead. It was still cool. Despite her patience being tested over and over again, she had never once lost her composure. At some point she had wondered if perhaps…
As she opened the wooden door with a long creaking sound she was surprised to see Uni still up and working.
Kei immediately spotted the red eyes. Quite contrary to her words she realized what they were actually implying. Knowing Uni's prideful side she assumed it would have hurt her more to admit her tears, so the Oracle didn't bring it up.
"Kei… Can we talk a little?" Uni's voice was shaking a bit when she made that request.
Kei was frankly surprised to hear that. She never had the feeling to be someone people would turn to for personal support. It stirred something inside her.
"I always listen to the very end, you know so."
Uni looked up to her with gratitude. Then she pulled her legs up on the chair and rested her chin on her knees. Such a defensive stance.
"I don't know what my purpose in life is anymore." She said.
The first and foremost trouble had now been thrown into the room. Kei had expected it, but that didn't make it any easier to address.
"Even if you lose one destiny another will soon appear." Kei replied.
"That doesn't sound like you at all… Are you just trying to comfort me?" Uni said with a sad smile.
"Those words were not mine. I picked them up when the prince of a certain kingdom was bereft of his throne. The court wizard told him exactly that and a few weeks later the prince became the leader of a rebellion. They overthrew the despotic king and created a democracy."
"Seriously?" Uni stared at Kei.
"Yes. During that time I was the financial advisor for said king. I pointed out that the taxes were too high, but he insisted on raising them."
"Wow. You have been doing some crazy stuff, huh?"
"Indubitably." Kei shrugged slightly and leaned herself against the desk. "The wizard's words hold weight. If you lose one opportunity, reach for another. Your sister has already done so."
"Big sis is strong." Uni said with a downcast expression. "I can't be like her."
"Is there any need to? Noire has her own regrets, I'm sure. She probably envies your determination as well."
"My… determination?" Uni listened up.
"You came to this place to secure the future of Gamindustri. Noire could not overcome her regrets so she chose to go her own way instead." She was probably putting too much conjecture into these statements. Kei could not reliably claim these things as objective truths. But sometimes objective truths were not necessary. She had learned that as well.
"That's not true! It's not true at all." Uni grit her teeth. "I didn't come here for anything great like that… I just wanted to be with Nepgear." She admitted her shame.
"…pardon?" Kei made a poker face. Uni's frail, yet longing expression gave her a very specific image. But that couldn't be accurate.
"I j-just want to be with t-the ones I l-love..!" Uni exclaimed. "But she shines too bright! She wants to help everyone! I can't drag her down again! That's why I decided to suppress these feelings!" Uni poured her heart out to the world.
Love? Kei put hand to her mouth and analyzed the outburst. Not just Noire, but Uni as well? There had been a strong friendship between those two girls, but did they actually become a real couple? If she had known that she would have approached the whole conversation differently. Uni had build a emotional dependence on someone other than Noire and this was the result…
Uni looked away with a flushed face. A mix of embarrassment and sadness.
Kei put down her hand and exhaled. This wasn't the time to go all analytical.
"I wasn't aware of your relationship. It was insensitive of me to speak as if I knew your feelings." She bowed her head.
"Please stop." Uni looked guilt ridden. "I can't ask Nepgear to look just at me." She wiped the fresh tears away.
"…" Kei had no response. Uni was correct. Saying anything to the contrary would be irresponsible.
"I don't want to sleep. I have these terrible dreams." Uni leaned her head on her hands. "I am standing at big sis' grave. And Nepgear stands next to me… and then she fades away."
"Are you afraid of dying?" Kei asked directly.
"It's scary… but I don't care if I die." Uni said darkly.
"You are afraid to lose other people." Kei nodded. "Turning human has some inconvenient side-effects to it. Aging, growing old, dying. We cannot avoid that reality."
"I always knew that, but suddenly I can't control this fear anymore." Uni was really lost.
"For me it was always a normal part of life. The important thing is to use that time wisely. To achieve what you want to achieve and then pass on without any leftover regrets." She was really not good at comforting someone. "Uni, if you have affections for Nepgear then you should use that as your starting line. Use your time wisely. Staying away would be a complete waste. It can only lead to regret."
"You want me to get closer to her, even though she works so hard?"
"There aren't very many people who work harder than you Uni." Kei countered. "I have seen your growth over the years. And now that I have returned that just became more apparent."
Uni's face lighted up ever so slightly.
"Why did you leave us Kei?" She asked while letting down her legs. "You said you wanted to improve as a Oracle. Is that true?"
"It is." The silver-haired girl chuckled.
"But you were a great Oracle already."
"My qualifications were purely… logical." Kei gazed out the window. "My journey was not started to improve my knowledge of business or bureaucracy. The thing I sought was… empathy." It was not easy to confess this, even for her. "I never understood people very well. I could tell what they wanted or how they tried to achieve it, but I never really understood them. The same goes for Noire and you. I saw you as the CPUs and the people I work with. I criticized Noire's decisions when they were not adhering to my logic."
"I didn't know you felt that way…" Uni was shocked.
"I have set out to see the perspectives of many different people. To comply with what was demanded of me I needed to understand my adversaries better than just on a want and need basis." She sighed. "It might have been a fool's errand."
"I think you were fine the way you were… Sometimes I thought you were too strict, but you did the right thing when necessary." Uni expressed her own thoughts on the matter.
"I have been cold. It was something I regretted dearly. If I had stayed here I would certainly have stopped Noire from pursuing her relationship with Lady Neptune. I would have easily forgotten Noire as my CPU and served Gold Third."
"Even if I can't be like you or Noire, I will try to follow your advice." Uni's words touched Kei. The girl was facing all these problems and still tried to encourage her back. "I will… try to be with Nepgear. No… no matter what." The hesitance in her words was apparent.
It seemed that even her best attempts were not enough. She needed to discuss this with someone who knew Uni even better.
Three days passed after the night of that emotional discussion.
Kei was now strolling through a park in Lastation. It didn't appear to be for relaxation. Every time she turned she subtly looked over her shoulder. After making an unnecessary stop at the hedge maze she finally slipped into the shadows of a back alley. From there she reached a backdoor that she knocked on in a specific pattern.
The instant her fist left the door for the last time the handle was pushed down and then the silver-haired girl was dragged in forcefully. Right away the door was closed and locked again.
Kei adjusted her suit that had been pulled so forcefully and looked at the door guard. She was wearing very tacky sunglasses and a ridiculous light blue wig.
"Did nobody follow you?" Noire asked with uneasy movements. She checked through the peek hole and the curtains of the window.
"I did my utmost to prevent it." She replied with a raised brow. "What is the meaning of all this secrecy about your location? This is the third time you changed your address since I contacted you three days ago." Perhaps there was a hint of irritation in her cool voice.
"I'm sorry; I had to get away from those places as fast as possible." Noire sighed in relief after making sure they were alone. "Let's go up to the apartment." She waved her to follow her upstairs.
"Who are you running from?" Kei pursed her lips, but followed obediently.
On the highest floor they finally entered Noire's new apartment. It was incredibly spacious and lots of costumes, instruments and other equipment were strewn about the ground. This was just another sign of Noire's hasty move. Admittedly this place was a paradise for any newbie artist or performer. It had a very nice atmosphere.
"I'm not running from her!" Noire looked up from the kitchen counter and pointed her finger at Kei.
"Her?" Kei wasn't deterred.
"Nnnngh… Neptune. She keeps finding me somehow." Noire grumbled and pushed a cup of piping hot coffee into Kei's hand.
"I didn't take you for someone to brag about your relationship." Kei said with a sly grin.
"Ha. Ha." Noire was exasperated. "You heard about our bet, right?" She sat down on a loosely placed mattress. It wasn't attached to a bed.
"Yes. Quite bold." Kei replied neutrally while sipping on the burning hot coffee without even shifting her facial expression.
"It seemed like a good idea at the time." Noire's hand went though her wig that was still perfectly covering her twintails.
"My assumption is that you are afraid of committing to such a rash decision now, which is why you do not want to meet Lady Neptune." Kei deduced.
"No, I definitely want to marry her." Noire replied calmly and picked up her own cup.
Kei almost chocked on her coffee.
While tapping her chest and coughing she stared at Noire. "…then what is the matter with meeting her?" She forced out between coughs.
"Don't look at me weird, okay? The reason why I'm avoiding Neptune…" She put down her sunglasses and gave her a serious look. "…is because I want to be the one to propose."
"…" Yes, Kei was indeed looking at her weird right now.
"Neptune has always been the one in control. But if I propose to her, then I will finally be ahead." Even Noire realized that it was rather silly reasoning.
"I understand. You wish to prepare a proposal that completely eclipses anything she has done before." What a very Noiresque move.
"But she keeps showing up to propose to me first!" Noire bit her nail and shifted her red eyes.
"You could simply refuse." Kei suggested.
"Never." Noire's voice suddenly turned cold. "I couldn't stand it if that happened to me. There is no way I can hurt her feelings like that."
Love was complex. Kei realized once again that she couldn't comprehend this mindset.
"I see. Then I will have to leave this matter to your judgment. But what is distracting you from proposing yourself?"
"Uh… I am currently preparing for my new… j-job." Noire was nervous. "It was a real surprise, you know? Apparently I am really good at singing and playing instruments, so I just happened to be scouted. Because I lost my position I thought, why not try it? It's not like I really care about it, but it would help me pay the bills!" She was making big gestures and acting as if it was a complete coincidence.
Right, she thought that nobody knew about her hobby and 'secret' concerts. Kei's eyes turned dull. For someone so smart Noire was acting like a fool rather often.
Aware of Kei's doubtful look, she shifted the topic.
"So what about Uni? You called me because you wanted to talk about her." She switched from foolishly embarrassing to worried big sister in a second. "She didn't seem to be in trouble when we talked during our daily call yesterday."
"She is putting up a front for you." Kei pointed out the obvious. "There have been some issues between her and Nepgear." She set down her coffee mug.
"Ah. I-is that so?" Noire was not used to talking about relationship drama, especially if it wasn't her own.
"I tried to give her my best advice. She has been sticking close to Nepgear and Uzume for the last few days, but that seemed to have created more discontent."
Noire nodded for her to go on.
"They have been getting into small fights repeatedly. I only noticed it by accident. Nepgear does not seem to be the aggressor however."
"Uni…" Noire held her forehead. "Just be honest with her."
If irony were a type of explosive, the entirety of Gamindustri would just have been vaporized in a pillar of flames.
"She also seems at odds with Uzume. Although she doesn't seem to realize it." Uzume was incredibly slow on the uptake. Kei was not especially emotional, but even she could tell what those glares were supposed to mean.
"I can understand why it would be frustrating to work with Uzume." Noire shrugged. "But Uni hasn't taken out her frustrations on others before." She was concerned to hear it.
Kei would have liked to contest that claim. While Noire had been trapped in the Gamindustri Graveyard Uni had quite often lashed out on Nepgear and her friends.
But those times were long gone. She agreed with Noire's assessment of the new Uni. She wasn't the type to be this aggressive.
The real reason she was mad at Uzume was complex, yet simple. Kei was not sure how to address it though.
"I am at the end of my wits." She revealed.
"I get it. Then let me take care of it." Noire said seriously. "Once I am done with the proposal I will confront Uni about it."
Overcoming her own trial before solving others. That was probably a wise move.
"Should I prepare a marriage form for you?"
"Pffffth?!" Noire spat out her coffee all over the apartment.
"…" Kei patiently wiped the liquid from her face. She should have seen that reaction coming.
"W-w-w-we d-don't need to get m-married right away! J-just getting engaged first, preparing my heart, going for a good location, must find a dress-" Her reply was becoming pretty tangled up. The heat of her face was raising the room temperature explosively.
"Yes."
"What's with that look that says 'This will never work out'?! I will show you! And I will show Neptune too! Just a few more days until I am done with my preparations." Noire was rebelling against fate.
"Lady Neptune is just as stubborn as you. She will not stop."
"I have something up my sleeve." Noire chuckled ominously.
"I will pray for your success. Albeit the goddess I am praying to is rather unreliable right now." Kei got up with a wry smile.
"How is Uzume doing?" The currently blue-haired ex-goddess was avoiding eye-contact as she asked.
"She has potential. We won't let the world end while you do what you have to." Those were her genuine feelings.
"!" Noire stared after her former Oracle as she left for the locked door.
Kei opened the door carefully and looked out for any spying eyes.
Noire deserved this time of normal worries and a common happiness. Kei would secretly cheer her on from her spot on the sidelines.
(To be continued)
Doo-bi-doo-bi-dee-doo.
"Welcome back my little song notes, to this one and only Hi Five Radio Extra! The only show with your host 5pb."
A few seconds of silence.
"And that's it. Cave is on a special monster extermination mission today, so we're back to the beginning when this was my show hahaha."
Whispering.
"And Miss Manager is also here of course. Well it feels a bit lonely, but should we get to today's question right away? Let's see what Chirper has to offer~"
[Has anybody else noticed this lovey-dovey atmosphere between Miss 5pb. and her supervisor?!]
[I totally ship them tbh.]
[Unforgivable!]
[Poor Miss Cave. It will be hard to make Lady 5pb. notice.]
"Huh? S-some lovely conversations are happening I see. Question, question…"
[They don't fit at all.]
[Opposites attract!]
[I want to… see pictures…]
[Miss 5pb. belongs to everyone!]
[The supervisor is also her bodyguard. That's so romantic :3]
"Ehh… You got it wrong. That's not it at all… We aren't like that…"
Concerned mumbling.
"No, I can pick the question out myself Miss Manager. Is this why Cave took over…?"
[Listen everyone, what if they are already hooked up and are just hiding it? I can like, totally see that.]
[For real!?]
[I'm jeaaaaloussssss!]
"…"
Sound of putting a phone down.
[Hello 5pb. My name is Kei Jinguji and I require your assistance.]
"Oh, a question from Miss Kei! Phew, I thought I wouldn't find one today…"
[The people around me all seem to be falling in love with each other and are starting relationships. I honestly did not expect it from such serious people.]
"W-wow I think I know what you mean."
[I am not very emotional, but it did kickstart some inconvenient thoughts. What if I realize my own feelings all of a sudden, but it is too late? The person I am looking at might already have moved on when I realize these feelings.]
"!"
[Well that is the hypothetical I have been considering recently. It is irrelevant to my duties so I thought of asking you, as you seem to be giving advice on love and everything related. Thank you for your time.]
"Aha.. haha… This isn't actually a show about love advice. It just turns out that a lot of people care about it."
20 seconds of silence.
"Right! My advice! Uhm… Do you really think that person would just move on? If your feelings are true, even when it took you some time to realize them… You should at least tell them about it. Otherwise that could stand between you. And nobody likes an awkward friendship, ehehe."
Sound of hand being placed on shoulder.
"I'm fine Miss Manager. Sorry if my advice didn't help this time. B-but you said it was just a thought experiment, so let's keep up the good vibrations instead! After this we will play a few cheery songs, how about that everyone~?"
Audience clapping track plays.
"Just kidding, there is no studio audience here! Until next time, 5pb. is plugging out~"
Fwoop.