A/N: PLEASE don't hate me.

Love always,

Elm

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Sometimes I wonder where it will take me. Life. Will we ever be free of the Illusive Man and my father? I am not certain, and that worries me. The only thing I know is that I will die to protect you. So if one day I'm not around anymore, you will always have Rue. And she will love you, more than life itself.

A NEW BEGINNING

She rubbed her bloodied hand with her thumb, pressing down hard with the soap bubbling up between her hands and turning pink as she wrung her hands roughly. She blinked into the dull sink as the water rushed down the drain in a tiny whirlpool.

Rinsing her hands she gazed into the mirror, a haughty, pale version of herself staring back and she hung her head low watching the swirling and mixing of blood and water. The white of her coat caught her attention as it groaned against the side of the sink. She grimaced. Dark blood stained it, a violent contrast against the bright white colour of her coat.

Miranda Lawson's blood. All over Liara's clothes. She swallowed still remembering the wet, slick blood pulsating through her fingers coating them in its sickening warmth. She remembered steeling herself, a mask of control slipping onto her face as Miranda started to shake, her face losing all its colour. She can hear Rue mumble for Miranda to stay awake, the usual commanding tone gone. The fearless commander isn't giving orders -she's pleading- begging Miranda to keep her eyes open, to stay awake, and then finally to not leave her. Liara could hear it all, her brain not quite comprehending what's going on as she desperately tries to stop the bleeding, but there is too much blood. There are too many holes screaming up at her from the informant's chest.

Then the informant starts crying, her hand flying up to grab Rue's shoulder her eyes widening in pain -or fear. Liara cannot tell difference from where she's kneeling.

"I know, I know," the commander says. She tries to sound calm, but Liara can hear the panic in her voice. "Stay with me, Ri. Just look at me, baby." The word slips out before the commander can think of it, rolls off her tongue as if it's the most natural thing in the world. It cuts Liara like a dull razor digging itself into her flesh, but she pushes the emotions aside focusing on pressing her hands down hard on the bleeding wounds. Miranda is whispering something, her voice too weak to speak and she can't make out the words. Liara's gaze falls to the floor where thick blood pools around the lithe body, soaking her knees. There's too much!

Then suddenly the shaking stops. Just like that. A soft whisper of breath cutting through the air as time stops, a sudden silence settling in the room.

"Ri!" Rue shakes Miranda's body as if to wake her from a good night's sleep. "Ri!" She calls out again.

Liara looks down at her hands still pressed to the chest. It doesn't move, but remains as still as a cool summer night and she slowly lifts her hands staring numbly at the pale woman on the floor.

She looks nothing like the Miranda Lawson she had hated so fiercely. That Miranda had been so arrogant, her pride an ever present expression on her face with her perfectly rosy cheeks. That woman had had impeccable skin, hair that seemed to never fall out of place and the perfect body, one that women and men could only dream of. And if that wasn't enough the woman had been given a mind so bright and brilliant Liara couldn't help but admire her.

"Dr. T'Soni?" Glyph's voice ripped her from her thoughts and she looked up blinking as if waking up from a bad dream.

"Yes, Glyph?"

The drone hovered in the air before her bobbing up and down slightly. "My readings tell me you are feeling," the drone paused shortly, "sad."

Reaching for the towel she gave the drone a wane smile. "It's been a long day today."

"You still have surveillance in Miss Lawson's room and the Commander has gone to inspect it. Would you like me to show it?"

"No, Glyph. Not this time. She needs to be alone for now."

~o~

"These cells are broken," she said and pointed to the tilted panels on the large fields next to the greenhouses. Her dad let his eyes sweep across the sea of solar panels that helped keep the whole colony running and self sustained.

"Can we get them fixed?"

"Do hanars sink in water?" She grinned.

"Not if they wear life vests," he chuckled and looked down at her. She shook her head. Her dad was such a dork!

"I can have them up and running in a few hours." She flicked the top of her omni-tool, a small screen popping up to greet her.

"Alright, but one condition."

"What?" She frowned.

"Dinner first."

"But dad!"

"Look kid, I said dinner," her dad said giving her his very best adult face. "But I didn't say we have to eat it with mum and Ina." A grin tugged at the corner of his mouth as he held out two plates carefully wrapped.

"Mum actually let you convince her to eat out here?" Her mum was never that adventurous. Dinner time was sacred to her mother. The one time of the day when they all sat down to converse about their day. If she could, Rue had no doubt her mother would make the whole colony sit down together and eat.

"Oh you know your mother. She has her weaknesses," her dad said conspiratorially.

"And you happen to be one of them?"

"Ha!" He barked out a laughter handing her one of the plates. "You're a smart kid, you know."

"Is this when you tell me I have to go to uni?" Oven baked pork, boiled potatoes with a thick creamy sauce and...she grimaced. Vegetables.

"It wouldn't hurt," her dad said as he sat down on the ground.

"Then who would look after the panels?" She sat down next to him. "Or you for that matter?" She glanced at the cast on his arm.

"Hey! It was hardly my fault that space cow rammed my ladder." He put the fork in his mouth, an expression of pure bliss crossing his face as he tasted the food.

"Not at all. Who could have guessed a space cow would get all defensive of its territory?" She asked in mock shock. "Oh yeah, anyone who's ever worked on a farm."

"Smart ass," he muttered taking another bite.

"Dumb ass," she countered, mashing the potatoes in the sauce.

"Brat."

"Old timer." She smiled when he stayed silent, knowing he let her win the playful banter. Her dad always let her win.

"So…" He said slowly after a moment of silence. "Mum tells me you've had a bit of a heartache lately."

She sighed. "She told you?"

"Yeah," he chuckled softly. "It is your mother we're talking about. She tells me everything."

"Of course she does," she sulked.

"You going to tell me about it?" Her dad asked.

She took a sip from her water and grimaced. "Why? What's the point? Haren dumped me, she's not going to change her mind."

He set his plate down and put his arm around her and pulled her close. "Haren is a fool."

"She's a beautiful fool."

He laughed. "You know, when I was young I had quite a few dalliances. I remember this one girl, Dahlia. Oh man, she broke your poor dad's heart so bad." He sighed at the memory before continuing. "I swear I thought I'd never meet anyone as great as her, but then…" She could see him glance towards their house.

"Then you met mum and the 'universe stopped'," she quoted him. The amount of times she'd been told about their first meeting…

"Roll your eyes all you want, but there'll come a day when you bring home a girl that takes your whole world and just shakes it up, who'll change things up and breathe life into you that you never even knew existed." Her dad -the dreamer- was speaking and she loved it when that side of him came out. "And you'll know and your mother and I will know that that's the one. That's the one you'll never stop fighting for. That's the one you'll have a bunch of brats with and grow old and saggy with. Haren, for all her beauty, is not that one."

~o~

The room lay cloaked in darkness the only source of light two monitors that hung silently on the wall. Rue stepped into the room her chest tightening into a knot as Miranda's familiar scent teased her senses. Swallowing thickly she looked around the room. Makeup lay strewn out across the desk and Ellie's toys and clothes cluttered the bed. Dark holes where the projectiles from Campbell's weapon had hit, gaped out at her. She clenched her jaws and walked up to the chair next to the desk, where Miranda's top lay slung across the back of the chair. She grabbed it and buried her face in it, closing her eyes as she breathed in the sweet smell of summer and white flowers.

"Balta's Excotic Foods?" Miranda looks up at the glowing sign above the street kitchen. "Please tell me it's not exotic in the same way that vorcha food is poisonous to humans."

"I can't promise you that, but I can promise I'll hold your hair back when you need to throw up," Rue fires off a grin as she leans over the counter. "My squad and I used to stop here every time we visited Omega. They have the best Salarian dishes out there."

Miranda wrinkles her nose skeptically and Rue laughs. "Ok, let's start slow. How about getting something humany? Like-"

"What are those?" The informant asks as she points towards the back of the small stall.

"Oh no, those are horrible you don't want to try those."

"Krogan Delicacies? How bad could they be?"

"Bad." Rue shudders.

She let her finger run across the desk trailing its length until she reached one of the drawers and she curled her fingers around the small handle and pulled it out. The bag was see through the dried dead fish staring up at her with hollow eyes. She shook her head smiling. I knew it.

"How bad?"

"It's dried fish that can only be found Tuchanka. I swear they're poisonous or something."

"Dried fish?" Miranda perks up next to her. "Oh, I want one of those."

She turns to stare at her lover. "What? No!"

"Why not?"

She pauses looking at Miranda incredulously. "Do you really want them?"

"Yes!" Miranda laughs. "Why? Aren't you going to kiss me if I eat those."

Snorting she jabs her finger towards one of the small bags and nods to the cashier. She places her credit chip against the small scanner on the bar disc and grins. "Oh don't you worry, Miss Lawson, I'm going to kiss you for the rest of your life."

"Shit." Rue closed the drawer again a cold tingle darting through her chest. She pinched the nose of her bridge and closed her eyes. Miranda's face flashed before her eyes, pale and frightened as she was slowly slipping away from her grasp. Remember me. Standing in the small quarters it was all Rue could do, the memories assaulting her all at once, hitting her like a tidal wave.

"Fuck!" She screamed and banged her fists against the desk sending makeup and a few datapads flying as the desk shook violently. They clattered back to the surface and she leaned over the desk her head hanging as she heaved heavily. This was not the time to be falling apart. She pinched her eyes together and pushed her closed fist into her mouth as she bit down hard into it. Cerberus had played them again, only this time they had gone after her family. The one thing more important than this war, than anything else, and the worst part was that she had been too blind to see what was going on. How could I be so blind?

"GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!" In a fit of rage and despair she recoiled from the desk and pulled out her gun firing it into one of the monitors that hung above the desk. It shattered with a piercing wail of its own matching the rapid popping of her gun as she emptied it, pulling the trigger until all she heard was the hopeless clicking of an empty weapon.

Staggering backwards she let her gun drop to the floor as she slid down along the wall and hid her face between her arms allowing herself this brief moment of weakness.

"Rue?" Karin's voice said gently as the doctor crouched down next to her. Rue hadn't heard her come in and she barely recognised her presence. "She's awake and she needs you." We all do. The unspoken words Rue knew lingered at the back of Karin's mind. Looking to her side she observed the doctor. Her grey hair had a mass of white strays streaking through it, her face weary and exhausted. Did she get enough sleep? Did any of them? "You need to be strong right now. More than you have ever needed before."

She drew a deep breath and nodded. "Yeah."

"Come on," Karin said and helped her to stand back up.

She closed her eyes one last time as she inhaled sharply, then opened them again. "Let's go."

~o~

"So did you always know?" She asked, leaning in to her father where they sat, their empty plates discarded on the ground next to them and the vast nightsky stretching above them, embracing their small planet with its comforting darkness.

"Always know what?"

"That mum was the one?"

"Yes. Even when I didn't know it." He replied cryptically.

"Even when her parents said they hated you?"

A hearty laughter tore from his lips and she could feel his chest shake with it. She grinned. Her mother's parents had despised him. To them he had been no more than a high school dropout and rebel with a bad influence on their daughter.

"Your grandparents could have disliked me for all they wanted. There was never any doubt that Lenora was the girl."

"So how did you change their minds?" She asked, quickly adding, "assuming you did."

"Why you cheeky little bugger," he snorted jokingly and brushed his scruffy beard. "It was easy."

"It was?" A star shot across the sky, a thin tail chasing after it as she frowned. She found it hard to believe either of her grandparents had been easy to win over. Once they had their mind set on something that was usually it.

"Yeah, all I had to do was have you and your sister." He winked at her.

"Yeah right…"

"It's true," he said a little more serious than before.

"Really..?"

"It's one thing disapproving of your kid's immature boyfriend, but once they have kids...well, they're your grandkids and the immature boyfriend has probably been forced to do a lot of growing up."

"How did you know you were ready for it? How did mum know you were ready for it?"

"You don't," he laughed. "Oh boy, you really don't, but then it just happens, you get thrown into it and you're scared to death. What if it breaks, what if it's faulty..."

"It?" She glared at him.

"But then suddenly you stand there with your kid in your arms and before you know it that kids is sixteen years old asking you a lot of difficult questions and you realise you've been ready for quite some time now."

"I still don't see how that persuaded grandad and grandma to like you," she admitted. "Having kids doesn't really make you a better person."

"But it does and it makes you family. That's your legacy, right there and suddenly you know, you'll never be alone." He turned his head to look at her. "It's...when you have children of your own you'll understand."

She snorted. "I might never have any."

"Oh, you will," he said calmly pulling her closer leaning his head onto hers. "And when you do you can bet your mum and I will be there to fuss over your kids just like your grandparents have done with you an Ina."

"I'm already dreading it."

~o~

Rue pulled to a stop by the door to her cabin and looked over at Karin. "What if I can't do this? What if I'm not ready? I'm not ready!"

The older woman smiled. "You'll be fine."

"Ok," she breathed trying not to let her feelings show.

"Hey," Joker stood up as she entered.

"Joker," she smiled. "EDI kick you out of the cockpit again?"

"Yeah, turns out a robot's ball and chain reaches all the way to the Captain's cabin," he joked back as she walked up to him.

"I heard that," EDI's voice rang out. "But for the record, my reach goes much further than that, Jeff."

Joker glared towards the ceiling as Rue passed him. She grinned giving him a pat on his back. "Under. The. Thumb," she whispered through the corner of her mouth drawing a growl from the helmsman.

Turning her head her gaze fell to the cot next to him and she stopped dead as reality slapped her in the face. Frightened and excited all the same. Something moved in it and she stared, her eyes transfixed on the thick fabric of the cot. She swallowed, her throat feeling dry, panic racing through her like a pack of wild dogs. Bracing herself she walked up to the cot and peered into it.

Ellie lay on her back, the usually mirth in her eyes replaced by a look of confusion. Her lips moved in unspoken words kicking her legs in frustration. Rue eyed the dark hair, the pale skin full of freckles, the green eyes and petite nose. There was no doubt Ellie was Miranda's. She paused. And hers. Ellie was hers.

Leaning down to pick the child up she felt her hands tremble. Rue placed her hands around the small child, carefully, as if Ellie would break if she squeezed her too hard. A small sob escaped Ellie's lips ripping like sharp claws at Rue's heart and she pulled her close, embracing her with her arms, a sudden need to protect her daughter overwhelming her as Ellie sniffled, her baby cheek warm and wet on Rue's neck. She'll breathe life into you that you never even knew existed.

"Ssh," she whispered kissing the cheek softly, her chest tightening with emotions. Then suddenly you stand there with your kid in your arms. Her father's amused voice echoed in her head. And all of a sudden you know, you'll never be alone. "I'm right here." She rocked Ellie gently, her eyes burning with the unshed tears. "I'm right here."

"Do you want to know what Miranda named her?" Karin asked from somewhere behind her.

"Ellie," she whispered, her voice thick with emotions.

"Elinor Ina Shepard."

Elinor Ina Shepard. Dad, you'd be so proud. Grief and joy mixed and mingled together and then for the first time in years she cried for the family she lost, her new family embracing her, guiding her through the storm of emotions, and she took shelter in their strength.

~o~

"I know you said you could have it fixed in a few hours, but…" Her father's voice trailed off. "I think maybe it's getting late. Why don't you finish it tomorrow?"

"Dad," she crossed her arms in protest. "If I get this done tonight I could help out with the water supplies tomorrow."

"The Jetsons can take care of the water supply," he said and picked up the plates. "Besides, you know your mother doesn't like it when you're out here on your own in the dark."

"What's the worst that could happen? We're just farmers." She smirked. "It's not like pirates or mercs come out here to raid all our corn..."

Looking up towards the sky her father scratched his beard. "Alright, but I want you back in an hour."

"Done deal."

"I mean it, Ruealin. Don't be late back," her father said giving her a serious look.

"I won't," she promised, turning back to the panel she had been working on. If she hurried she could have all the panels fixed in two hours. Her father wasn't going to notice the extra hour.

Whistling she worked as quick as she could, replacing the broken cells, adjusting each panel before moving on to the next. Her omni-tool beeped, but she ignored it as she dashed towards the last panel. Two hours fifty minutes. Ok, so maybe he'll notice that. Her omni-tool beeped again. And again. And again.

Frowning she set her tool box down and pulled up the small screen on her omni-too. Ten unread messages from dad and Ina? She tapped the first message.

[Dad 21:03:13] Get home ASAP.

[Dad 21:03:21] Rue you need to get home now!

[Ina 21:04:06] Where are you?! Why aren't you answering? The colony are under attack! We need to get to the safe house, but dad has gone out to find you! COME HOME NOW!

[Dad 21:04:11] When you get this stay where you are, I'm coming to get you.

She looked up in terror just in time to see the explosion tear through the building next to the field. It shredded the walls as if it they were made of nothing but paper and she ducked, closing her eyes as an ear deafening sound ripped through the night.

"Run!" The familiar voice shouted through the ringing in her ears caused by the massive explosion. She spun around, her eyes darting from one side to the other until she saw her father dash towards her closely followed by three dark figures. One minute he was running, shouting for her to run, to flee, the next, three tufts of red blossomed from his head, shrapnel ripping through his skull before his body slumped to the ground. Run!

~o~

Rue leaned against the headboard of her bed with Ellie propped up against her knees.

"Why aren't you tired yet?" She let her finger stroke the tip of Ellie's nose drawing a giggle from her. "Less giggling, more sleeping," she whispered stroking the soft head lightly and Ellie closed her eyes momentarily.

"Alright, let's put you to bed." Getting up she put Ellie back into her cot, but before she could move away she heard a small, miserable whine. "I guess on a day like this it's ok for you to sleep in…" She paused, the word feeling unfamiliar and odd. "In mummy's bed…"

"Ummy," Ellie seemed to agree.

"Alright, come here, but don't complain to me if you get squished." What if I really do squish her? Shaking her head she crawled into bed. Stop being paranoid. Ellie settled in next to her and she turned her head to look at the small child snuggling with her armpit. Smiling Rue looked up through the large window above her bed, the glittering of a million stars blinking back at her. After her family had been murdered she used to look up at the night sky pretending they were out there somewhere still looking out for her. She hadn't allowed herself to think of them for years. I miss you. She wiped away the dampness in her eyes. And I wish you were here. Looking down on Ellie she swallowed the thick burning lump in her throat and cupped the small head in the palm of her hand. Ellie blinked and yawned as she tried her utmost to stay awake.

"Sleep little bugger," she cooed and Ellie stirred as if to protest to the request. "You know," she said slowly. "When I was a kid I liked to spend hours looking at the night sky. We had a field right next to our house and mom would pack blankets for me, dad and Ina so we could go out and watch the sky before bedtime. I was always trying to spot falling stars…Whenever I saw one I would make a wish. It was so magical." She smiled wryly. "Until my dad told me they were just orbiting satellites…" She chuckled softly at the memory. "All that time I'd been making wishes on orbiting satellites. Satellites or not...this is by far bigger and better than anything I ever wished for back then…"

TO BE CONTINUED...

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A/N: Any thoughts or feelings about this chapter? Please review!