Routine was one of the very few things the two villains had in common, so when they found one that suited both they stuck to it like a tack in a shoe, or at least Hades had thought so.
Each morning Hades tumbled out of bed at six, pulled out his ear plugs and dressed, ready for his morning ritual of popping in to check on the underworld. Maleficent woke when he did, but stayed in bed until six-thirty, less than eager to get up at all. They ate breakfast together at eight after she had finished her morning walk and he had made sure everyone in the underworld was still miserable and dead. Then from there, they went their separate ways. Hades set himself to doing whatever nefarious planning he had for the day and Maleficent worked through some old spell books, trying desperately to figure out how to get rid of her nightmares. By lunchtime, they were both tired and willing to set aside villainy for the day. Sometimes he surprised her with a picnic, which she had no qualms about taking in the afternoon, but most times they sat at the smaller table he had fashioned and traded words over simple meals. Maleficent napped from then until four, while he took a tour of the kingdom, enjoying the mayhem his unique appearance caused as well as his sudden departure. At four, they walked together, going nowhere really but a circle back to the castle. Then it was supper at five, wine and cuddling afterwards and then bed. They loved every moment of it.
Two weeks into this arrangement, Hades ruined everything.
To be fair, the fact that 'everything' was 'ruined' was an opinion and little more.
The day began like any other and continued similarly until he began his continued tour of the kingdom. It was a hobby actually and little more. But he did it anyway, eager to gather more information about 14th century life mainly because he had no other current aspirations.
"Lunch okay?" he asked, walking along with Maleficent. She nodded, looking rather drawn today. He decided not to comment on it and opened their bedroom for her. "Well, rest well." he smirked, drawing her against him for a pleasant kiss. She smiled, taking a moment to long to recover from the activity. He convinced himself that she was just tired. If he bothered her about it, she'd snap and that would help no one.
He changed into period friendly trousers and shirt, altering his natural appearance enough to allow him to explore in peace. If anyone bugged him he'd yank out his real self like a sword. Usually he did not bother, but today he wanted to blend.
The streets in the village he'd picked at random were narrow and smelly. Waste lay here and there as if someone had dumped their potty buckets in the first clear location. He wrinkled his nose and stepped over a yellowish puddle. Sheesh, his own century had better plumbing.
There was a travelling merchant group in town. Acrobats twirled brightly coloured batons, dressed in clashing stripes that would make any clown proud and envious. He found himself enjoying the antics. There were dancing girls too, scanty clad for the era, but unappealing to his. The large 'dancing' bear caught the majority of his attention though. It stood on its hind legs and staggered back and forth, wagging its huge collared head. It was fascinating and horrific all in the same blissful moment. That was what the castle needed, he mused. A few animal skins laying around to warm the place up. Besides, he smiled mischievously, he'd heard wonderful things about the merits of rugs.
He noted, as fellow bear-watchers milled about him, that the bear only stayed where it was meant due thanks to a large chain fastened to the collar. A delicious thought came to mind. What would a dancing bear do if unchained? He liked to think it would do horrible things, but on second thought, vetoed the idea. There was too great a chance that it would just stand there. No, he needed a real monster. Something like he'd used back when to try to off his nephew.
Mind made up, he pointed a finger at the bear and zapped it. At first, nothing happened, but then as he leisurely walked away, the bear's eyes darkened. By the time he was far enough away to in no way be linked to the occurrence, the creature's fur was rippling and it was roaring in anger. Before the started peasants, the bear grew to nearly five times its former size, easily snapping the chain as it struck out. Pandemonium broke out and Hades chuckled as he continued on through the town. Finally something really entertaining.
He planned to find a nice hill to set up a chair, lemonade and watch the festivities. It truly was the 'little things' in life that kept the ball rolling.
"Mama?" a voice wailed somewhere to his left. He froze, almost literally as a cold hand gripped his leg. Even with his trousers on, which chaffed to Mount Olympus, the iciness of the little fingers sent a shiver up his blue spine.
"What gives, kid?" he growled, turning on the culprit. He had several choice statements all ready to dish out until he had fully taken in the kid.
It was small, dirty and ragged. Black hair grew unkept, uncombed and unwashed over wide tearstained eyes and soil smeared cheeks. "Whoa." Hades blinked, suddenly not as angry as he'd been a mere second ago. He guessed the kid was three, maybe four, but hey, he was no good judge of age. Only kid he'd ever 'done' anything with had been Herc and he'd been pretty sure the 'infant' his brother had been showing off had to have been at least two.
"Mama." The little lips quivered and the immortal found himself back in the oracle's dilapidated home staring into a bubbling pot at the miniature Maleficent. Oh no, he almost shouted, backing away from the kid. Not this. No. When he'd murmured those sweet nothings to Centy about their future and all that, he'd meant going fifty-fifty on groceries and the like. Long walks, giving her shoulder rubs and being willing to endure black feathers on the floor... not this. Never this. Hades hated a great deal, but on his list, kids were number two and that ranking only existed because he hated anyone who created them aka parents even more.
But the tears dripped and the arms extended despite the internal war. As if he had not suffered enough, his brain screamed as he almost robot like scooped up the kid. "Papa." the child cooed, a smile breaking through the filth.
Hades looked around desperately for the parents of the wayward urchin. Surely there was someone looking for the bony imp. But as the panic continued around him and he held the child, it became clear with each passing second that no one cared that the innocent child had been scooped up by a stranger.
He walked, in a daze, trying not to crush the kid with his powerful hands. He could feel the wild thumping of the kid's heart against his arm and there was almost no weight to speak of. A fairly good judge of human depravity, he had to admit the child was abandoned in one sense or another.
But why come to him? Why trust him when there was a whole village of saps?
Ah hah! Hades set the kid down and altered himself back to his normal appearance. Shock and horror would send the kiddy screaming toward some other pathetic being. But the kid just stared, smiling as if he'd offered ice cream and free tickets to some children's show.
"Looks like I'm the pathetic sap today." he muttered, tossing the kid up onto his shoulder. A straw of a leg moved over his head to ride better and here he was, lord of the underworld a horse to a child.
"I'm getting the couch tonight."