Love at a time of War
Well... that was a cliffhanger but I don't think our 'favourite' Chosen One will be on the scene just yet, I think this has also transformed itself into a stop ROTS from happening (in the sense of order 66 or Anakin's turn to the darkside I am not sure of yet) as well as dealing with Obi-Wan, who's fundamental character was totally misunderstood by Anakin thus causing this demise. Shame really.
Anyways onwards with the story. Again please Read and REVIEW as this is my skills project for DofE and also i spend time on it.
Obi-Wan stood in the middle of the council chambers as he recalled, for the umpteenth time about his mission to some unknown planet with unknown culture. He closed his eyes, carelessly throwing his thoughts back to how he and Qui-Gon used to research a planets 100 year history, grasping the language, politics, economics of any civilisation before even attempting to find craft. Back when the Jedi were peace keepers and not some unknown, closed military force. Military intelligence they were calling us now, no different to the bureau of information, but with more power. His hood was up, as was his companions', a sign of mourning amongst the Jedi, yet he had to be strong. He didn't risk a glance at her, fully concentrated on the meeting.
"A shame it is, for one so adept" Yoda murmured in conciliation, while Master Windu's eyes seem to bore into Kenobi's, challenging him to admit that once again he had failed, this time his padawan. Wearily he mental shook himself, attempting once again to find his balance. Beside him his grand-padawan whimpered slightly. It wasn't Jedi like, not remotely, however the whole situation was- as far as Obi-Wan was concerned- unjedilike: gone were the days when Padawan of deceased master's were allowed to reconcile their thoughts; given time for mourning even if their next destination was Bandomeer. Many weren't willing to take on another padawan, and those that were the Council had refused due to some attachment or another. Now, Obi-Wan knew that even though there were fewer masters there were fewer still padawans, either due to them dying faster than knights, or simply because initiates were lower, parents choosing to risk having an untrained child as opposed to releasing him to, what was considered certain death amongst the front. Now, many masters would vie for Ahsoka's padawanship, yet she didn't know this, all she knew was that her master, her father-like figure was gone. Just as Obi-Wan's brother, best friend, was gone. She had only known for a matter of minutes, and it was a testament to Anakin that she had held onto her jedi training.
"He's not dead" Obi-Wan sighed again, he had told a distraught Padme, he had told the Chancellor, who- for all this caring of Anakin- had just watched and stared, like a spider that had his eye on two juicy flies. He had told the clones to keep searching, that something was wrong. He had felt the bomb yet, he had felt the surprise of Anakin, he had felt a presence, but he had not felt the snap and excruciating pain of a death, not like he had with Master Qui Gon, not like he had with Siri, or even Cercasi. He closed his eyes trying to desperately hold onto something, yet the Force was slippery, running away from him like dry sand. He tried desperately not to panic. Panicking would not help his (if he had it his way) soon to be padawan, nor his cause to go back to the said unknown planet and rescue his former padawan. He tried to ignore, with the Jedi calm, the looks he got from them: that finally what they had known all along, that he was too attached, was correct. The Team was no more and Obi-Wan may be quite mad. He rose above it, focussing instead on the way he would retrieve his errant partner from that sith stinking unknown planet. He paused his thoughts, releasing his pent up frustration into the Force before he started sounding more like Anakin. He had to get out of here, guide Ahsoka through some meditation, they could all feel she was practically vibrating with pent up energy, and, Obi-Wan knew what sort of outburst that would release. Just don't do it in front of the council, he all but mentally begged the padawan, hoping the tiny little bond he shared with her would accept and transmit his plea.
"Master Kenobi" Plo-Koon spoke, looking at Ahsoka, the younger jedi master sighed wearily, pleased at least one of the councillors had noticed the presence of the padawan. "Perhaps a meditation is in order before we can resume?" Obi-Wan nodded, meditation was the last thing Anakin's padawan needed, but it was an exit from the council chambers. He'd have to take her to his quarters, Force knew what it was like to loose a master and be expected to sleep in a bed that still smelt like him, still had his stuff in it, still… he blocked his thoughts, releasing the anger he felt at the council into the Force. He would not allow Ahsoka to feel the same anger, yet he must keep an eye on her, who knew what Sith-spawned ideas she was having about escaping the temple right now? He bowed, and frowned when he did not feel Ahsoka bow. Insolence would not help her case right now, but it might help his.
"Padawan" he mentions warningly, applying a small about of pressure with The Force, it was underhand and only worked due to her muddled and exhausted state. He even doubted she recognised it as a Force suggestion. The council certainly didn't. Slowly he rose, preying that Ahsoka would follow his lead as he walked out the chambers.
"This way" he says gently, guiding her along a different series of corridors than what she was previously used too. She follows without question, not even looking up around her new surroundings, what was the point? Her master was gone, she was left with what? too old to now be considered by another master, not that she wanted to replace Anakin, not by a long shot. But she owned it to her brilliant, unorthodox, feeling Master to continue with her Jedi training. I will touch the Force now that he cannot, a familiar lesson pulled from when younglings first started to consider death as something more than abstract. Yet who would consider the Padawan of someone most Jedi thought was too suited to war and bloodshed, to someone that the council openly denounced training of, and the championed cause of a whimsical master? all this she had learnt from the Archives. Her fate now rested with the Agri-Corps, and it was not wanted. "In here" The soft tones pull her away from her thoughts and a hand presses into her shoulders, lightly propelling her through the door into the room. "Let it out" the voice speaks again, taken on an eerie distant quality: a force suggestion. It is then that she breaks down, not as a Jedi would but the way an emotional teenage girl in danger of loosing everything she knows right after loosing her teacher and guide. Through it all Obi-Wan never commented, never mentioned a single part of the code. Instead he made ready to weather the emotional storm that was currently the Force in his apartment.
His comm link beeped, slowly drawing Ahsoka out of her foetal position. "Master?" she murmured, the look in her eyes a total contrast to even half an hour before, nearly causing Obi-Wan to loose the fragile hold he had on his own emotions. She appeared dead, even her Force signature was blurred and marred by uncertainty, he knew that feeling well- it had dogged him through his late childhood: Agricorps. Ahsoka hadn't needed to take trials, born at such a time there were too many masters to padawans, and with those that could take on padawans actively encouraged to seek them out or have them placed upon them like what the council did to Anakin. It made even those that shouldn't be allowed to become Jedi Knights were being trained, and it ended with more falling at the hands of the Separatists: either under equipped padawans or desperate masters trying to protect their charges. Now, the Agricorps found members through half trained padawans. Young teenagers whom like Ahsoka, had not completed training and had no other option. He almost smiled sadly at how little faith his padawan's padawan placed in him, and it made his thoughts flash back to Anakin: his carefree laugh rattling around in his head, causing him to almost drop his comm link.
"Master Kenobi" he answers, frowning at Ahsoka in concern. How he longed to reach out to her, but to do so now, while it was clear she had no trust in him as a mentor, would merely make things worse- for both of them because he was sure that as soon as he actually saw her break down again he would loose his own grip on his double bladed pain: he had failed his padawan, who had apparently disappeared without a trace, and his own master.
"Kenobi, it is time" Master Windu's Korun accent filled the room, emotionless yet at the same time daring. It made Obi-Wan flinch, flashing back to when he himself had to pack his bags. Mildly he was surprised that such an adept padawan was being thrown out, that there weren't masters'- as he had previously thought- vying for her service. Once again he had to remember the social stigma attached to being with Anakin, and whose fault was that? Not his, he had tried his hardest to get Anakin to interact on a social level, he refused to acknowledge any other reason. He looked kindly at Ahsoka, desperately willing her to speak to the Master, to hold her fate up as something to be proud of, even on the outside. Show off Anakin's training until such a time that he was able to throw down his own cards.
"So soon?" he inquires mildly. "I was just going to take Padawan Tano through some medication exercises". He feels Ahsoka look up at his emphasis on the word Padawan, he saw hope blossom in her eyes, was this how I looked every time his master had given him a mild hint? How his dignity had suffered on that trip to Bandomeer.
"The council has put in place strategies once she gets to her new assignment" Windu cut in curtly, the light died down behind Ahsoka's eyes, and Obi-Wan could only sigh. That was three Padawan's that the council had refused to train: one championed by Yoda, another by Qui-Gon. It must run through the bond's that connected him back through to Yoda: His Master's master's master. The third would be championed by himself.
"What if I had found a suitable Master" Kenobi asks again, rubbing his beard and tugging on it, allowing the movement to help him find a centre, it used to be his use of a Padawan braid so long ago, that had helped him grab him and pull him through whatever emotional storm he would be experiencing. Those that said Anakin felt too much didn't… he stopped, noticing his own thought process was beginning to address Anakin in the past tense, another barrier was slowly erected around that particular thought. He needed to mediate, that old thing that caused him to abandon his own Padawan in his early years: that was the last thing Ahsoka needed right now, she needed him to go through meditations with her.
"The council decided that this would be better for Ahsoka" Windu replied after a moments hesitation, and Ahsoka whimpered totally out of smart remarks to say, and lacking the energy to get angry. A trip to Bandomeer would be the last thing she needed in this exhausted state, yet this wasn't a conversation to be held over a simple comm link. Kenobi merely uttered an affirmation and hung up before looking at the Togruta.
"I remember an Intiate that went to Bandomeer and came back a Padawan" A voice at the doors spoke kindly, directed at Ahsoka who looked up to find Bant standing looking at her and Obi-Wan smiling, noting with concern the way her friend practically sagged in relief of another understanding Jedi being there for support.
"I also remember that once about how a master came for an orphaned padawan and took her in." Obi-Wan followed through after a pause, admiring the way his friend didn't even flicker with the age old sadness that even he carried at the death of Master Tahl. He turned back to Ahsoka who had been watching the pair curiously.
"You won't be going to the Agricorps" Bant replied, enveloping the young padawan into a hug of comfort. Once more Obi-Wan resolved to stand up against the council on this one, only this time he wouldn't be alone, many in the Jedi would want to help Ahsoka, even if they weren't prepared to accept her as their Padawan they wouldn't want her cast out. To her credit the young Togruta pulled away from the mon calamari's grasp and stood up, squaring herself after mere hours of alternatively quiet and loud mourning.
"I won't need to take anything" Ahsoka replied steadily, free of any warmth or tenacity that it had once processed, Anakin's disappearance- because Obi-Wan knew he wasn't dead- had punched something out of her, but the Jedi's final rejection had carved out everything else and thrown it away to be left on some wretched battlefield somewhere. "I am ready, not everyone can be a Jedi" Echoing words form so long ago made Obi-Wan flinch as old wounds, thought to be long healed, ached in now unfamiliar places. Bant merely nodded, propelling both of them towards the door, her head down. Kenobi looked at her once, the emotions surrounding her of a mix of shame and mourning, before setting off with new resolve: to continue Anakin's legacy.
Mace Windu was waiting for them, arms folded, looking sternly around at the too loud younglings. Often it had merely been Master Windu's presence that had quietened down a whole clan's canteen, Yoda had been playful with them, earning respect through friendship, Windu merely demanded respect and self discipline from those around him, and had the knack of being able to sense the disruptive initiates and force them through meditation exercises. Beside him was Master Plo Koon, looking as emotionless as ever but projecting a great deal of calmness towards Ahsoka. Did he, the one that had found the Padawan in the first place, accept this fate? Or did he know of Obi-Wan's resolve. It was largely frowned upon for a master to take on the training of one that he had found, and led to disastrous consequences such as Xantos. Another reason why Ahsoka's fate was doomed.
"Master's" Obi-Wan bowed at them each in turn, Ahsoka moving to do so- her bow to half heartened to be considered of anything but a force of habit. "I don't agree with this decision" Obi-Wan followed his bow with instant disobedience, his hand reached out and grabbed Ahsoka by the shoulder propelling her to stand with him, as a padawan should when in the presence of her Master. It was not missed by Plo Koon who nodded approval to Kenobi. Something that was gratefully accepted, I am not alone in this reasoning Obi-Wan thought, The Force be willing this will not be that bad an outcome. "I have no Padawan, I haven't for a while" He proceeded, following a line of reasoning that would show warfare strategy with a good mix of diplomacy thrown in for good measure. He ignored the way Windu frowned at him. "I could take over Ahsoka's padawanship for now, then when she is ready for trials both of us are free to take on two Padawan's each- be it from orphaned or fresh stock" It was a cringing moment when he identified strategic advantages of training more Padawan, outside of what the Force ought to be suggesting. Silence met his words except from Ahsoka's not noticeably quickened breathing, the idea that hope was not totally gone and that there was somebody still fighting for her cause.
"You had planned this" Windu asks, his dark eyes seemingly boring into Ahsoka's damaged soul as he surveyed as potentially still useable. Ahsoka looks up to her one protector, allowing her to be guided through the maze.
"Of course" Obi-Wan replied tartly, before hastily moving towards a more diplomatic tone. "My former Padawan and I have many agreements with each other, this is a war zone and we are only Jedi, not some all seeing all powerful race" he paused, ignoring the incredulous look Ahsoka gave him, how could she not think they had planned for each other's potential deaths especially when the council shoved them through massacre after massacre. Between them they had seen more action that most of the council combined, and even many of the knights. However even Obi-Wan was the first to admit that he was slightly more prepared for death than he was this disappearance of his former Padawan. "I agreed readily to take on Ahsoka in the event of Anakin's death, or should I rephrase: in the event Anakin cannot continue her learning" Because his former Padawan was not dead, the chosen one could not have died on his watch. It just shouldn't have happened. "She will not be going to Bandomeer" he emphasised, his hand maintaining a resting point on her shoulder.
"Master?" Ahsoka whispered looking up at him, smiling lightly as she watched his face crinkle into the best smile that could happen at the time. She pulls away from him slightly but even she can feel the fine thread connecting their minds almost bulge as the elder master presses emotions through it, trying to connect the two of them together as if to convince Windu this was a good idea. It wasn't his decision to make, but with Yoda away on the front there was little choice to be had, there would be a vote with only half the council present. It all hinged on Master Mundi and Master Fisto, the latter who had taken on an orphaned Padawan, however which were willing to stand up the Master Windu?
"Lil 'soka should be trained" Plo koon spoke, "She has displayed many abilities both on and off the battlefield that have saved beings time and time again" he paused. "Her shortfalls means she is not ready to become a knight, but instead we must watch her progress through the trial of spirit and see if the Force has chosen a… kinder path than the one we are giving her". He moved slightly, changing the playing field by standing against his superior. Obi-Wan held his breath, as he felt his friends presence and heard two sets of footsteps.
"I second the motion" The voice of Kit Fisto rang through all of them as he came to stand beside Obi-Wan, Bant beside him. "I know first hand what it is like to raise an orphaned Padawan, however I did not know how it felt to feel that bond break, Kenobi, we must remember, knows both. Skywalker was an orphan- for he bore attachments freshly torn from his mother and planet, and he knows what it is like to loose his Master" He turned to Obi-Wan eyeing him up, regarding him as if a Padawan once again. He levelled the gaze with one of his own, turning it into a regarding of equals, Kit nodded once before turning back to Master Windu, who was looking steadily more displeased.
"It is passed then" Windu said finally, looking at Kenobi. "I hope you know what your what your doing Obi-Wan" he warned as he passed.
"So do I" Obi Wan agreed before turning back to the masters that were assembled. "Thank you for your help masters" he bowed at them slowly, "I am gladdened that what spoke to me in The Force wasn't a misinterpretation and that Ahsoka shouldn't have been allowed to go to Bandomeer" They nod, acknowledging his thanks, before dispersing, each with an apologetic smile or comment to Ahsoka, who merely nodded, utterly spent from the few hours she had had. Even Obi-Wan realised that he hadn't actually slept since Anakin's disappearance, a worrying thought now that he had a charge to look after. He wondered if he would be moving back into his old room, where Anakin slept as 'Master' but thought better of it. Tonight he would sleep on the couch, and hopefully Ahsoka may sleep without a Force suggestion placed on her.
"I will help" Bant's quiet voice murmured to Obi-Wan, as they guided the Togruta back through the halls. "I know what it is like to be her age Obi" she attempts to explain without dismissing his own pain. "I was almost turned out too remember?" a gentle nudge to show that she was indeed right, she hadn't been there when her master had died either and somehow that was worse that Obi-Wan running to catch up with his Master. He wasn't going to argue with her, but he hoped she would never live to see someone she cared about struck down, like he had…. too many times now.
"Thank you" he said quietly as they reached the door, lurching into a clumsy hug with the mon calamari, smelling the familiar scent of saltiness and dampness of material. "I am grateful for your help, and Ahsoka will be too, in time" Bant's eyes sparkled in brief amusement before moving away from the door. Obi-Wan sighed before turning back to Ahsoka.
"He is not dead" Obi-Wan supplied, wondering if Ahsoka could sense what he did, or if his bond with Anakin was merely stronger. "And we will find him, but for now my Padawan let us proceed with stage 3 meditation" Slowly he pushed her into a corner of the room and sat down with her, preparing finally to sort out the mess of emotions that was the pair of them.
Please read and review