ROLLERCOASTER

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Ode To Joy

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'Freude, schöner Götterfunken, Tochter aus Elysium…'

'Ode to Joy? Really?'

'Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, Dein Heiligtum.'

'It's just that you don't strike me as a Beethoven sort of a girl.'

'Got roped into joining a choir recently, if you must know.'

'You know, I have the original manuscript for that work…'

'And I'm not a Beethoven sort of girl, or any sort of girl. I'm a grown woman, in case you hadn't noticed.'

'Oh, I'd noticed.'

Tasha gave her prisoner a curt, sarcastic smile, and went back to her notes, still singing under her breath.

'Deine Zauber binden wieder…'

'Not the statement again,' Fajo groaned, his hands pressed in exasperation to his temples. 'This is cruel and unusual punishment…'

Tasha continued to study her notes. 'You threw a vial of corrosive liquid at Lieutenant Commander Data…'

'Just to get rid of that damned uniform, since he refused to take it off. I didn't hurt him.'

'You stripped a prisoner, against his expressed consent.'

Fajo threw himself violently into a sarcastic pantomime of childish woe, rubbing his fists against his eyes and stamping his feet. 'Oh, Boo-Hoo-Hoo! Took the robot out of its original costume! Whaaah!' He folded his arms, sullenly. 'What if I did? What difference does it make?'

Tasha shrugged, nonchalantly. 'Well, since that classes as a Personal Assault, it makes a difference of an extra couple of years on your sentence.'

'What?!' Fajo spat.

'Oh, I wouldn't worry too much about it,' Tasha added, 'the stretch you're looking at already is so long it'll be a drop in the ocean.'

Fajo just glared at her.

Tasha fought back a smirk. '"Boo-Hoo-Hoo", indeed.' She sang softly once more, re-reading Data's statement for any more misdemeanours she could throw the book at Fajo for. 'Was die Mode streng geteilt…'

'Ode to Joy?' asked a voice from behind her.

She turned to see Data give Llewellyn the door guard a courteous nod as he was allowed into the Brig. Tasha was satisfied to see the scowl on Fajo's face deepen even further.

'I do not believe that I have ever heard you sing before,' Data added. 'You have an agreeable tone. I am anticipating your chamber choir's recital…'

'Data,' pleaded Fajo, peevishly, 'call your Guard Dog off, for pity's sake.'

'Commander Yar,' Data began to explain in the same patient tone he had used on Q, 'is not a…'

Tasha pushed forward to address Fajo, nudging Data aside with her shoulder. 'You know, you're the second prisoner I've had in the last couple of months who's referred to me in that way.'

'Why,' Fajo sneered, 'what did the last one do?'

'He regretted it.'

'Is that some sort of threat?'

'I am certain that Commander Yar would not let you come to any physical harm under her guard,' Data informed his former abductor, calmly. He paused. 'However, I would advise against purposefully enraging her. She has… certain methods…'

'She's been spending the last two hours tormenting me with a list of countless trumped-up charges that your people are going to persecute me with.'

Data peered at Tasha's notes for a moment. 'These charges are all valid, to my recollection,' he told the prisoner. 'As for being persecuted; you are a criminal. You must face judgement for what you have done.'

'But she's enjoying it! She's gloating!' Fajo paused, sourly. 'I can only guess you've come here for similar reasons.'

'No,' Data told him simply, before taking Tasha to one side, addressing her with a hushed tone. 'Wesley informed me that you were particularly upset when the crew was made to believe I had perished…'

Tasha rolled her eyes. 'Well, thanks a lot, Wesley.'

'…that, in fact, the main reason you had for joining the chamber choir was that you expressed a wish to sing at my memorial ceremony,' continued Data, not appearing to pick up on Tasha's discomfort, 'that you assisted tirelessly in Geordi's investigation over the discrepancies of the shuttle explosion since, in your words, you "would give anything for even the most remote chance to bring back that sweet, stupid bag of bolts"…'

Tasha bit down a sheepish grin at the android's repetition of the words she had spoken in exhausted emotional turmoil less than 24 hours previously. 'Next time we see Wesley, remind me to punch that boy in the kidneys.'

'Hello?!' called Fajo from his cell, 'I'm still here, you know…'

'I can remind you if you so wish,' replied Data, bemused, 'but you must be aware that carrying out such an act would be extremely inadvisable. In fact, I would personally restrain you from doing so if you attempted such an attack.'

'Stop ignoring me!' Fajo tried waving his hands above his head in order to attract their attention. 'Why are you ignoring me? You must have had some reason for coming all the way over here to see me, so…' He trailed off. 'Unless, you didn't come here to see me at all. You came here to see her, didn't you?'

Tasha and Data glanced in unison over at the prisoner, who broke into a vicious grin.

'So. It has a girlfriend.'

'No, it doesn't,' Tasha replied, correcting herself with 'he doesn't,' before Data could draw breath to pick her up on her momentary pronoun trouble.

'Oh, that's just too precious,' Fajo continued, happily. 'I thought your ethics were weakness enough, but sentimentality…? That, Data, is a true Achilles Heel. If only I'd known about that sooner…' he shrugged. 'Oh well, at least I know now. For next time.'

'You do not seriously believe that you will be able to escape a lengthy prison sentence?' Data asked. 'Even if you manage to do so, your assets are gone. You will no longer be able to buy the equipment and manpower that you used to detain me before. You have also lost Starfleet's trust, the element of surprise…'

'But I wouldn't need any of that to make you compliant,' Fajo spat, 'now would I? How'd you like to see your little Guard Dog on a choke chain, hmm, Data? Bet you wouldn't be so insubordinate then, would you?'

Tasha put her hand on the android's shoulder. 'This guy's starting to bore me, Data. Shall we take this conversation elsewhere?'

'Very well.'

'Oh,' Fajo continued to rail, 'then you'd do what you were told. I bet you'd do tricks. I bet you'd…'

Tasha addressed the door guard, warmly. 'Will you be all right babysitting our guest for a while, Llewellyn?'

'Sure,' replied the stoic guard.

'And for the record,' she added to Llewellyn, confidentially, 'he couldn't be more wrong about that whole Girlfriend thing.'

'You're the Boss,' replied Llewellyn with a faint smirk.

'He is wrong!' she insisted as she led Data out of the Brig.

'Come back!' Fajo called as they walked out, 'don't you dare think I'm done with you! I'll get you back for this! Oh, I'll get you, my pretty. You, and your little dog, as…'

The door closed behind them, mercifully shutting out Fajo's irate cat-calling.

'Do you really believe that I am a "stupid bag of bolts", Tasha?' asked Data, suddenly.

'I did say you were sweet, as well.'

'But stupid.'

Tasha smiled. 'OK, so that was a little harsh…'

'And, unless you were referring to certain social difficulties I occasionally succumb to as mere "stupidity", it was also inaccurate.'

'I meant it fondly,' argued Tasha.

'I do not dispute that,' Data replied. 'I have found reports of your response to my apparent demise to be surprisingly devoted. Is it true that you wept considerably over my supposed death, on at least two separate occasions…?'

'Wesley told you about that, too?' She asked through gritted teeth.

'Actually,' Data admitted, 'that was Geordi.'

Tasha cast a glance ceiling-ward. 'Men. All you ever do is gossip.'

'Hey,' called a youthful, male voice from behind them both, 'wanna hear some gossip?'

Tasha turned to see a particularly excitable Ensign Crusher bounding towards them like a puppy with a new squeaky ball. Tasha hated puppies, with or without squeaky balls.

Wesley bounced to a stop. 'You will never guess some of the loot we've confiscated off of Fajo…'

'Tasha?' Interrupted Data.

'Yes, Data?'

'Punch Wesley in the kidneys.'

'What?!'

'Commander Yar requested earlier that I should remind her to do so the next time we saw you,' Data explained to the horrified Ensign. 'However…'

'However,' interjected Tasha, 'I guess you're off the hook, since somebody told me recently that to do so would be extremely inadvisable.' She wrapped a friendly arm around Data's shoulder, and gave Wesley a meaningful glare. 'Somebody who is very smart, and not a stupid bag of bolts.'

'Oh,' sighed Wesley in sheepish understanding. 'So that's why you're mad at me, huh?'

Tasha grinned. How could she be mad? How could anybody be mad on a day like today? The stars outside were particularly shiny, the air particularly sweet. Justice had been meted out to an exceptionally nasty crook, and the good friend that she had thought dead was alive and well and at her side. It was a day to be joyful. It was a day for singing Beethoven.

'Don't worry, Wes,' she replied genially, 'we're just playing with you.'

'We are…?' inquired the android at her side, a little lost.

Wesley offered Tasha a relieved, but still slightly sheepish smile. 'Guess all's well that ends well.'

'Guess so.'

Wesley jerked a thumb in the direction he'd previously been excitedly heading. 'So, are you guys coming to the cargo bay? Worf said it would be OK as long as nobody touches anything…'

'Me and Data were sorta in the middle of a conversation,' Tasha replied. 'We were just going to continue it over a cup of coffee.'

'But you can't miss out on seeing something like this,' persisted Wesley, 'we're talking about pretty much every important artefact that's gone missing over the last two decades, all together in the same place…'

'I know,' Tasha replied with an uncommon patience. 'I'm the one who organised bringing it all carefully on board.'

'And I was all too recently the newest addition to the "loot" of which you speak,' added Data. 'I am in no hurry to return myself to it.' He turned to Tasha. 'Shall we take coffee now?'

'I don't see why not.' Tasha gave Wesley an over-sweet smile. 'Unless you have any more embarrassing stories to tell about me, Ensign, we'll be on our way.'

Wesley watched as the duo about-turned a little awkwardly, since Tasha's hand was still on Data's shoulder, and walked off in the direction of the Turbolift together. As they walked he heard the Chief of Security begin to softly sing – her voice growing in volume and confidence as the android at her side, automatically, it seemed, took up the tenor line of her tune.

'Deine Zauber binden wieder, Was die Mode streng geteilt…'

He shook his head as they rounded a corner and disappeared from sight. 'Strange people.'

He stepped away, and the voices of the unseen singers faded into the hum of the ship. 'Alle Menschen werden Brüder, Wo Dein sanfter Flügel weilt.'