OMG! Quick! Get in here and shut the door quickly! I'm sorry; it's nice to see friends again and I don't mean to be bossy, but this is the first moment alone in the last couple of days. Suddenly Superstars and Divas are coming up to me and talking to me; I'm not sure how to react to that. I know I should be happy; but I'd gotten so use to being left by myself and whispered about, that this sudden onslaught of people is a bit overwhelming. Now I am rarely alone; at least never for long and now I have to explain to people about my disease and my journal. It's kind of nerve-wrecking. How did this sudden change occur you ask? Well; I'm guessing it has something to do with Jessie having made her WWE debut on Friday night; I already had a meeting with the WWE creative team. They thought the whole 'Jessie' character was great; they said they were surprised that I would go off script and create a whole new identity without clearing it with them, but that the fans loved it and so had they. So starting on Monday Night Raw; I am supposed to stop being Sam and start being Jessie! How the hell do I do that? We are two separate people; it's like me asking all of you to become someone else. It's a good thing I'm a good wrestler; hopefully I'll be able to fake it. It's crazy; but that is just the start of the story.

Friday night I came forward while in the shower. As usual I had no idea what had happened in the span of time before realizing I was in the shower. I finished up and stepped out; starting to towel off. I happened to glance in the mirror and I froze. I had a hickey on my neck; and what looked like faint teeth marks on my neck and shoulder. I immediately panicked; I obviously had been attacked, I wrapped the towel around myself. I felt violated and confused; I reached the bedside table and grabbed what I hoped had the answers, the journal. I opened it to the last page there was writing; I was happy to see an entry from Jessie. I read the entry; I wasn't surprised to hear that someone from the Authority came after me, but the last sentence was a surprise. Jessie had sex with Jon. I sat there on the bed and re-read the last sentence. I was oddly not mad. I know you are all wondering why I wouldn't be mad, she slept with my boyfriend; my boyfriend that I hadn't even slept with yet! Ok…maybe I was a little mad. That must be where the marks and the hickey came from. Duh Sam! Of course that's where they came from; you know the Authority didn't suck on your neck and bite you. I needed more information. I needed to know if she started things off or if Jon had used the fact that Jessie was forward to have sex. It didn't seem like something I would expect Jon to do; but honestly we hadn't been together that long. Maybe there was a side I hadn't seen in him yet; I needed to know and I knew he was the only one who could answer the question. I looked at the clock; it was midnight and I didn't care. I threw on clothes and headed to the room I knew he was staying in. I paused briefly at the door of his room; thinking about how crazy it was that I was going to wake him up at midnight and ask him about sex with my alter. At least I wasn't a hysterical, screaming banshee; who was going to make a big spectacle out of things. That would have been embarrassing; yet here I was knocking on Jon's hotel room door. I heard him yell, 'Go Away'! I didn't go away; I knocked again. I could hear him cursing in the room; I won't repeat what he said. I heard the stomping as he approached the door.

"Who the fuck is it?" he growled as he yanked the door open. Jon was pissed; I could see it in his face. Duh Sam! You just woke him up out of a sound sleep; of course he's pissed. It wasn't until he realized it was me that his demeanor changed. He watched me for a moment; I could tell he was trying to decide who was standing in front of him.

"It's me; Sam. I need to know about earlier; I mean I know about earlier, I just need to know more about earlier." Jon let me in to the room and let me sit down in a chair, while he took a seat on the edge of the bed. He was clearly uncomfortable and part of me did feel bad for him. "Jessie wrote in the journal that the two of you had sex. I am guessing she told me in case things got awkward with us. More awkward than me coming to your room and asking you about having sex with my alter. I'm sorry Jon. I'm not angry about it; honestly. I just…I just need to know if Jessie came on to you or if you came on to her." Jon raked his hands through his hair and I got this feeling I wasn't going to like the answer.

"I'm sorry Sam; I wasn't sure how this would play out, I wasn't sure of what was going to happen. Jessie came on to me; but I'm just as equal in the blame. I could have said no and I didn't. I guess I just convinced myself that because the two of you are the same person; it wasn't cheating on you. Fuck! I don't know. Was it cheating on you? I don't even know. I should have said no." Jon hadn't thought about it; it wasn't pre-meditated and now he felt horrible about it. It was written all over his face. I moved from the chair to the edge of the bed beside him.

"It's ok Jon; I suppose in a normal situation I would be freaking out and would call it cheating. I really can't call it cheating Jon. You were with me; but not me. My last boyfriend had sex with Jessie; I didn't get angry with him. I can't blame a man really; she doesn't have the issues with sex I do, she doesn't worry about what would happen if another alter came out. She's the more sexual one of the three of us. I can't tell you that I'll be ready anytime soon to have sex with you or anyone Jon; I know my illness is hard on other people besides myself and if you want to get out now, I would understand. Life with me is hard and even for me it's hard."

"I'm not out Sam. I have never quit on anything I've wanted ever. I wouldn't be so sure about Jessie though. She cares more than you might think. She wanted me to stay the night; I think she enjoyed having someone close to her or you. You know what I mean. She asked me to go; well actually she started to ask; but I volunteered. I understood why she was asking; she was worried about Emily coming forward, she was worried about you coming forward and thinking I had forced you or something. She cared enough to take her chances and tell you we had sex; so that we would be ok. I'd say she cared a lot. When you are ready and feel comfortable; I think that I would be very lucky to be the guy in your life. I can be patient; I can try anyways." I hugged him.