A/N: Sorry I didn't update yesterday everyone, it was a Uni friend's 21st birthday party on Friday night and I want to forget every single minute of pain that was the resultant hangover….definitely wasn't able to edit, let alone write! After hating myself and resolving to never drink again, I am back on the writing wagon and currently faffing about with Chapter 11. I might start doing every-other-day updates from now on, as they'll probably start being longer and will include more people, and I want to make sure everyone sounds in character and blah blah blahhhhh, hope you won't mind tooooo much! I'll try and make it all super duper good :D

And thank you for your reviews on the last chapter, it was my favourite one to write so far and I'm so glad you all liked it!

Once again, DISCLAIMER ALERT: Nothing is mine. Except my obsession.

Chapter 10. It's Alright, It's OK.

''No Tony. You are not doing this. Tell me you are not doing this''.

Tony stared at the petite redhead in front of him, seeing the fear and confusion in her eyes, noticing the way her voice changed after the second pause from utter disbelief to desperate pleading.

''Pepper…'' he reached forward, meaning to catch her arm, to hold her, reassure her, but she pulled away, her lip wobbling and tears biting at her eyes.

''How can you – just what did you think – I can't believe – why Tony!'' her voice was strangled, and Tony detected anger under the distress, anger and revulsion. He pulled his hand through his hair for the thousandth time with frustration, frustration at himself, at Pepper, at Loki, at Fury, at all of them, at everything.

''Look, I don't know'' he implored, searching Peppers face with his eyes, silently begging her to just listen, to try and understand, because he didn't even understand himself yet but if Pepper could, then maybe they could work through it together, and maybe he wouldn't be left feeling like he'd just ridden 8 hours non stop on the loop-the-loop at Six Flags. ''I don't know, OK? I can't explain...not properly. Not yet. All I know is, this guy's hurt, and he's screaming out for help, and if he wasn't here, he'd be getting broken into a million pieces by someone hell bent on trying to mend things without taking into account the core of the problem. He's - ''

He was cut off by the burst of laughter that exploded from Pepper's mouth, a maniacal, ragged type of laugh.

''Mending? Broken? This is not one of your suits, Tony, this isn't some – some problem with one of your prototypes that you can just tinker over in your lab until the pieces fit back together. This is a murderer you're talking about, a murderer from another planet, who killed over a hundred people, who killed one of your friends, and you're telling me YOU'VE INVITED HIM TO LIVE WITH YOU!''

Tendrils of hair had escaped Pepper's usually neat up-do and were flying round her face, she seemed electrified with rage.

'I did not invite him to live with me!'' Tony drew quotation marks in the air, as if to reinforce to himself and Pepper just how absurd and ridiculous that notion had sounded. 'That was Fury's contrivance, born of his infinite wisdom in – in who knows what fuckery. I never suggested having Loki here. I only wanted him to be given a chance at – at some kind of rehab, or whatever, because contrary to what the rest of the world might think, I don't believe murdering someone charged with murder to teach others that murder is wrong is exactly logical! I just wanted someone to offer him the alternatives that I had. Because if you remember, I wasn't always Mr Superhero myself''.

Pepper looked as though she was about to argue back, but at Tony's last words, she closed her mouth, defeated, although her eyes were still shiny and her pupils too large for her to appear entirely calm.

''Tony, you're…that's…that was completely different''.

''Is it? Is it Pep? I was a mass murderer. I made things that went bang and killed everyone in the vicinity, regardless of whether they were innocent or not, regardless of whether they were women, children, men. I sold those things to people who didn't care either way. Don't tell me you've forgotten, because Christ, if you have, you need to give me a dose of whatever you took, and you better make it a triple''. Tony's voice had taken on the tense, disgusted tone that was reserved for discussions about his own past, a tone that Pepper had heard more than anyone, although that never made it easier.

''Tony….'' This time it was Pepper who reached out an arm, and Tony who shrugged her off, moving so his back was leaning against the wall, kicking his heel at the skirting. ''Tony, this isn't about you''.

''No, it is. This is about me. Even if I don't want to be – do you think I want this? I don't have a choice. Loki and me…we're similar. Too similar. And I only just got that today, and I think I'm the only one who gets it. And that's why I'm doing this. I don't give a damn if nobody else ever gets it. Except him. I'm going to make him get it, and I'm going to put an end to his fucked up cries for help''.

''Stop being – just stop trying to be a fucking superhero Tony!'' Peppers eyes were fresh with tears again, she had moved opposite him and sunk down onto the bottom step of the staircase. ''I know what this is! You're trying to beat everyone again, trying to be the guy that made the evil guy good – trying to show that you can save more than just the world, that you can get one up on everyone else. But this is Loki, Tony, this isn't a fucking game - ''

Tony was shocked, Pepper never swore. When she did….it was bad. When she did, it was usually because he'd fucked up, big time. It was usually because she was hurting so much, and from experience, it was usually Tony who had done the hurting. Directly or indirectly. Seeing Pepper like this caused Tony physical pain, and she made him feel guilt like no one else ever seemed to. Except for himself, and now, apparently, Loki. Watching Pepper sobbing on the step was unnaturally close to seeing Loki lose it in his penthouse earlier, and Tony felt a brief sharp stab pass through his chest – did that mean he felt protective of Loki? – before forcing the thought away, intent only on making Pepper understand, making her stop crying. This was a hundred times harder than trying to persuade the Avengers that Loki deserved a second chance. Pepper was practically family, a part of himself. She was his 'better half', she made sure he ate and didn't drink too much and looked after his diary and his company and all the other things he just couldn't pretend to care about. He needed her on board, more than anything. If Pepper was behind him, Tony could kid himself this was normal, that he had made the right call. Pepper was voicing all his own doubts and insecurities, and Tony couldn't afford to have them materialize now. It was too late for doubts.

''Pep….I am a superhero'' he said softly, slowly easing himself down so he was sitting next to her. ''Besides, I'm pretty damn good at it. Out of everyone…you really think there's someone other than me who could tackle Loki? Come on Pep, you know they'd be flattened in a nano-second''. His attempt to cheer her up with a joke didn't have quite the effect he wanted; although she stopped hiccupping, the tears continued to fall silently from her eyes.

''It's dangerous Tony. He's dangerous. How do you think I feel, knowing that he's going to be in the same building as you, how do I know I won't arrive one day to find you killed in your bed and the whole of Miami torn to the ground? How can you trust him, how can you stand to be near him, after what he's done, after everything - ''

''He's not going to kill me. That much I'm sure of. Well, 90% sure''. He shut up, seeing the fresh wave of sobs wrenched from Peppers lips at his ill timed quip. ''Sorry, that was shit of me. Seriously though. It's fine. Or as near to fine as it needs to be. And I'm going to make it more than fine. I don't trust him, not entirely, but…it took me a long time to trust myself. And I still have doubts. Loki is just one massive pile of doubt. He doesn't trust anyone, let alone himself. And that's how I can stand to be near him. Because I know the one person he wants to destroy above all others is himself, everyone else who gets hurt is just a by product. While he's here, there are no by products. He can't do anything to me that I haven't already done to myself. Without any toys, he'll be looking for other ways to occupy himself….and that's where I come in. I'm going to show him other ways. Give him stuff to do, stuff to think. I don't know what, and I don't know how, but…I'll figure it out. SHEILD will help. And the others…they'll be around. In time. It's his last chance, Pep. Doesn't everyone deserve a last chance?''

Pepper turned to him at those final words, recognising them, they were the same ones she herself had said to him all those years ago, on one of the nights where he'd practically drowned himself in alcohol and she found him slumped over the kitchen table, incoherent, self destructive, filled with self loathing. She could see now the spark in his eyes, the fierce determination that accompanied his words, the hammer headed resolution that told her he was doing this, the same look he got when fighting demons, internal or external. Regarding Loki, she supposed, it was a bit of both.

Without saying a word, she lowered her head to rest it on Tony's shoulder, and didn't move away when he wrapped an arm around her waist. She was consenting, at last, she was still reluctant, still scared, still probably doubting his sanity, still angry. But she was still there, she hadn't left in disgust, she would stand behind him as she had always done. And for the first time, Tony truly believed that everything was going to turn out OK.

XXXXX

The jet had been cruising at 25000 feet for the past 2 hours, and Tony was getting restless. One more hour to go, and he'd be home…and he hadn't yet decided if he wanted to hurry up and get there or have his pilot turn the plane round and hare off as far as possible in the opposite direction. Usually, returning back to his Malibu mansion after an Avengers mission was like arriving in heaven, but this time it was different. This time, there would be no relaxing by the pool, having JARVIS fill him in about anything he might have missed, or any parties going on in the area that night; there would be no ordering take out and getting Pepper over and getting finely mashed on cocktails till dawn. No celebrations this time, because the prize had already been given.

And it was currently sat in the back of his plane, handcuffed and bound, staring out of the window as if looking into another world entirely.

Which Tony supposed was technically true.

It was nothing compared to the far side of next century he expected to be kicked into when Pepper found out just what his prize was.

XXXXXX

Tony felt Pepper lean into him, and allowed himself to take the weight of her body and all the emotions that were still leaking out of her every pore, swirling around them like a blanket. Tony knew Pepper hadn't agreed with him, as such, but she had given in, for now – given him a chance to prove what he had only recently convinced himself of. All in all, it was a better reaction that he had anticipated – he'd had the shouting, the crying, the begging, the threats…but she hadn't walked out on him, and she didn't hate him. When he had felt the jet begin its descent, he had contacted JARVIS through the comms and ordered him to ring her, telling her to be round within 30 minutes. That had given him enough time to get Loki (and Thor) into his house and over to the second wing, where they were both to be staying – Loki had been given a small, relatively empty room at the back of the house, with Thor the slightly bigger one next to him; and Tony had wasted no time instructing JARVIS exactly what locks to tighten, what alerts to give him, where the younger Asgardian was allowed to go, and when, and who he was allowed to talk to. Thor had been given no such restraints, but as his primary purpose was to guard his brother, he hadn't exactly required a room by room tour either. That would come later, after Tony had introduced Pepper to his new living conditions.

Priorities. After all, although they were no longer 'officially' an item, Pepper still had a huge part in Tony's life, as his best friend, CEO and platonic 'other half'; and he barely went a day without seeing or speaking to her. If he was in New York, so was she, and he made sure if he was going to be at his Malibu pad then she got 'time off' her work schedule to join him. They fitted together, they were easy company, he knew no one like her. Which is why as soon as he was visited by Agent Coulson a couple of days ago and recruited for the latest Avengers mission, he had sent her straight to Miami, out of the way, to prevent her from harm and to prevent him from worrying about her. They had decided 'it' just wasn't working a long while ago, (Tony's ego, incessant flirting, insanely erratic work schedule and seeming inability to ever grow up each playing their own relatively large part in the decision), but Tony doubted he would ever care for someone in the same way as he cared for her. He loved her, just wasn't 'in love' with her. Thankfully, she had seen the sense in their reverting to 'just friends', and they had fallen back easily into what they had today, which was something that Tony would never take for granted, and which he knew was going to indispensible to him throughout the whole 'Loki situation'.

He bent down and brushed his lips softly across the top of her head, silently thanking her for being the one true constant that he suspected he was about to become himself, to someone who hadn't been grounded in so long he probably still felt like he was still falling. Falling down, looking up at the people he wanted most of all to save him. Tony was about to become those people, but with a difference – he was going to make sure Loki never let go again.

Page breakers and really don't like each other do they? Sorry if mine get confusing...the middle italic paragraph denoted with the two 'XXXXX's' is a flashback, hopefully you all got that anyway though! I tried to do lines and dashs, doc uploader said no. Gah.