We got to Washington late that night. Levi was still passed out on my shoulder and I couldn't understand why he'd feel safe enough to sleep next to me. I couldn't understand anything he did. Him holding me at night when I started crying, or how he refused to kill me no matter how much I begged and pleaded. I don't know when I stopped thinking of him as a thorn in my side and more of someone I needed to lean on. Maybe it was the night he stitched me up. Maybe it was when he saved me.

I wasn't sure what to think.

No, I guess that wasn't true. I knew what this was I just refused to acknowledge it.

I gently shook Levi awake and he sat up more alert than I thought could be possible after a nap. He jumped out of the car and stretched, making a small noise in the back of his throat. Sasha led us into the house. It was huge and despite the pictures and furniture around the place it still felt empty. Or maybe I just felt empty.

God, when did I get so cynical.

"If I remember correctly there's only five rooms, so we're going to have to pair up." Sasha said. "Connie and I can take one. I assume you and Mike will share one too?" She looked at Erwin who only nodded. Mike reached over and took his hand in his. I watched their fingers intertwine thinking of what Erwin had told me on the way here. Mike was his reason for living. Even if he still wanted to die he wouldn't do it because he found something good.

Armin was good. Mikasa was good. Levi, dare I say it, was good.

I tore my eyes away to look back at Sasha.

"Christa and I will share a room," Ymir said.

Sasha flashed a grin at them. "Okay, two rooms left."

"Levi needs to share one with Eren," Erwin spoke up.

I looked up at him about to protest, but Mikasa beat me to it.

"Why him," she argued. "I'm his sister."

"Because Levi has had more experience with vampires then you have," Erwin told her. "Especially newborns. If something goes wrong Levi knows how to handle it."

"But-!"

"I also don't think Armin would appreciate sleeping in the same bed as me," Levi said. "He'd feel more comfortable with you."

She looked like she wanted to argue more, and I wanted her to do so also, but she looked at me for a moment before closing her mouth.

We all parted to go to bed, Levi and I taking the bedroom at the very end of the hallway. I dumped my suitcase onto the floor at the foot of the bed and Levi did the same with his.

Levi sat down on the bed, but I couldn't find it in myself to go to sleep quite yet. I pulled out a granola bar from my bag remembering Erwin saying that I still needed to eat human food. At least that was one thing I didn't need to give up. I nibbled on it quietly, choosing to look out the window instead of face Levi. I was still pissed at him for not doing what I had asked of him.

"I'm sorry things have turned out so shitty," Levi spoke up. "And I'm sorry I can't give you what you feel you need." He paused for a moment. "Well, actually I guess I'm not. I just wish I knew how to make this easier for you."

"You can't." I told him, keeping the emotion out of my voice. This was the last thing I expected of him. Levi didn't seem like the type to go out of his way to console someone, let alone me.

He sighed behind me. "I know. Eren, I need you to understand something. We need you. Mikasa and Armin especially. Leaving them behind would be selfish of you, and maybe it's selfish of me to make sure you keep living but….." I heard the bed creak as Levi stood up. "I need you around too."

The bathroom door closed behind him, and I fell to my knees sobbing into my hands.

I didn't know how to do this.

Mikasa knocked on my door the next day, and before I could even answer she walked right in. I frowned at her and grabbed an old shirt from the floor and tossed it at her.

"Don't walk in like that," I grumbled, a little annoyed. "What if I was naked."

"It's nothing I haven't seen before," she said. She walked over and sat on the bed patting the spot next to her. "We need to talk."

"If this is about-."

"You're not allowed to kill yourself." Mikasa cut me off before I could finish. I frowned at her for a moment before crossing my arms and looking away. This was the exact conversation I wanted to avoid having with her.

"First Erwin, than Levi, and now you." I muttered under my breath. "Do any of you understand?"

"Eren, I don't think you understand."

I cocked my head confused, "What do you mean?"

"Do you understand how much easier you can hunt now that you're one of them?" She asked. "You can keep up with their strength and their speed. There's less chance of you dying now that you're one of them. You can-."

"What does it matter," I looked at her incredulously, trying to figure out how she could look at this so positively. A vampire killed our mom, and now I've become one. How could she possibly be okay with this? "You know I'm going to outlive you right? You and Armin are going to die and I'm going to be all alone."

"So you're going to die first so we're the ones who have to suffer?" Mikasa was getting angry now, and that only pissed me off even more. "You know I refuse to leave you alone. I'll turn into one of those damn vampires myself. Mom told me to take care of you so that's what I'm going to do."

"I don't need to be taken care of!" I shouted. I clenched my fists and ground my teeth trying to keep myself under control.

"You obviously do!" She shouted right back. "Here you are trying to figure out when you can go off and kill yourself, and if you did that then it means I've failed! You and Armin are the only family I have left and I refuse to let you do this to me."

"It's not your choice!"

"What about mom?" she asked. I looked away sharply and glared at the wall. She didn't speak for a moment, like she was waiting for me to, before continuing on. "What about the monster that killed her? Didn't you promise to kill him? I thought that's what we did all this for, to find him and take him out. Are you going to throw that away so quickly all because of this?" She waved her hands at my body in emphasis.

I bit my lip and scowled. Truth be told I hadn't thought about that, not since the night I was turned. I felt sick now. Guilty. I was frustrated with myself for forgetting that so quickly and easily.

"So stick around, Eren," Mikasa said softly. "We still have a job to do. I still need my family."

I let out a breath as she stood up and walked up to me carefully.

She was right. I couldn't die yet.

"Okay," I whispered. "I'll stay."

She let out a sigh of relief and wrapped her arms around me, squeezing me tightly. I hugged her back and buried my face into her shoulder.

It became normal for me to share a bed with Levi. I hardly even thought about it anymore. We were four days into our time in Washington but I felt like time really hadn't passed at all. I spent most of my time in bed or in the living room with Armin and Mikasa watching whatever they managed to find on TV. With each day I felt an ache growing in my bones and my throat and I knew I'd need to feed soon, but I couldn't find it in myself to ask for help. I pushed it down and to the back of my mind. Mikasa had mentioned letting me drink from her but I could bear the thought of her blood in my mouth. It made me queasy just thinking about it. So I ignored it the ache.

Hanji and Erwin were busy trying to pinpoint the exact location of the Titans, or at least the general area they were in. It was a lot harder than they anticipated.

"We've managed to narrow it down to about three cities," Hanji explained. "They're all next to each other so its still too much ground to cover but we're getting there."

"I know everyone has been antsy lately," Erwin spoke up. "We need to lay low, though. If they find out we're on to them they'll slaughter us before we could even pull our weapons. We're far enough away that I doubt they'd come to this town but just in case I want everyone armed before they leave the house to do anything. If you leave you will bring someone with you and let the whole group know where you're headed and what time you'll be back."

Erwin pulled me aside later that night, worry etched on his features. "Eren, you haven't drinking anything."

"I had a water," I mumbled, knowing that wasn't what he was asking but refusing to play into this. If I annoyed him enough maybe he'd go away.

He sighed in annoyance, "Eren, the longer you go without blood the more volatile you become. I will not put my people in danger because of your stubbornness. Either you drink from someone or I will force it down your throat."

I paled at that, gripping my hands tight. As much as the thought scared me it pissed me off even more that he would actually threaten to do it. I wanted to hit him. I wanted to hurt him. Erwin couldn't make me do anything because I was not his to boss around.

But he was right, and I hated myself for admitting it.

"Are we clear?"

I ground my teeth together for a moment before nodding stiffly.

"Good," Erwin put a hand on my shoulder. "I'm going to bed, its getting late. I'll see you tomorrow."

I didn't say anything as he walked away. I waited for him to close the bedroom door behind him before I walked into my own. Levi was on the bed drying off his hair and I took a step back in shock when I realized the only thing he was wearing was a towel around his waist. I swallowed audibly before turning my attention to my suitcase to grab a pair of pajama pants to sleep in. I kept my back to him as I slid my pants off.

"Nice ass, Jaeger."

I thought I was going to die.

"Shut up," I mumbled, slipping on my pjs quickly.

"Bite me."

"Do you just like vampire puns or something?" I asked turning around.

He stared at me wide eyed, like he was suddenly scared that I had caught on. He looked away to grab a brush from the bedside table and run it through his hair. "Um, no. A friend of mine used to say it a lot and it kind of grew on me."

I didn't ask anymore, the way his back tensed up had me regretting even bringing it up in the first place. I pulled my shirt over my head and stuck it in the corner with the rest of my dirty clothes. I was running low on choices to wear so I'd have to wash them tomorrow. I grimaced slightly at the idea before turning back to Levi.

"You haven't drank anything," Levi said as I laid down next to him.

I ran a hand down my face with a groan, "Why is everyone obsessed with my blood intake?"

"Erwin talk to you about it?" he asked.

"You could say that."

It was quieted for a moment before Levi said softly, "Bite me."

I looked at him in confusion, trying to figure out what I had said to make him throw his shitty vampire joke at me. "What? Did I say something?"

He grimaced. "No you idiot, I'm being serious."

I stared at him in shock, "Wait, what?"

"Are you deaf or something?" Levi rubbed his face in annoyance. "Fuck, you really are a brat."

I sat up a little offended, "Don't be an ass, Levi. I'm not going to bite you."

He just regarded me coolly as he sat up with me, "You need to drink, if you don't you'll just get sick and attack someone else."

I paled at that. "But-."

"I know this isn't what you wanted. Trust me, nobody would have wanted this for you either. This is your reality now, though, and you need to take it seriously before you hurt someone." He put his hand to the back of my head, rubbing my scalp as if he was trying to sooth me.

I stared at him unable to think of anything decent to say. Of course I didn't want to hurt anyone. That was the last thing I wanted. Drinking blood though, from someone who was living and breathing as I did, scared me.

"I don't want to," I whispered. "What if I can't stop?"

"I'm not giving you a choice," Levi told me, voice commanding. He pulled my head closer to him. "I'll make sure you don't kill me."

"But-."

"Eren, please shut up."

He pulled my head into the crook of his neck and I started shaking. I could hear the blood in his veins and the beating of his heart and it made my mouth water. I whimpered and closed my eyes.

"Hurry up."

I placed one hand to the back of his head and the other to his shoulder and I realized he was shaking too. He was just as scared as I was. I took a shaky breath and gently wound my fingers through his hair to coax him to tilt his head just a little more. His own hand tightened on the back on my head and I fought back a complaint.

I opened my mouth a little and tried to steel myself for what I was about to do. I was more than terrified. I genuinely liked Levi, a lot. I didn't want to hurt him. I realized though that the more I stalled the more he started shaking, so I took a deep breath and bit into his shoulder before I could dwell on it anymore.

Levi gasped and I found myself whimpering again as his blood filled my mouth. It was different then what I remembered Armin's tasting like, better, but I chalked that up to it just being a different person. I suppose no two people taste alike.

It was different though in that I was aware of myself too. I knew I could stop if I wanted to but I trusted Levi to know his limits. He'd let me know when to stop. His hand relaxed in my hair to run through it instead. He was still shaking and it made me feel terrible but I didn't know what to do about it. I rubbed my thumb into his shoulder to try and let him know that I was okay and in my right mind. It seemed to work.

The ache in my bones soothed as I drank, and after a moment Levi whispered, "Okay, thats enough."

I pulled away from him, licking the two puncture marks on his neck as blood seeped from them. Levi shuddered against me and I watched patiently as the holes closed up and healed over before pulling away.

Levi looked at me slightly dazed before frowning. "You have blood on the corner of your lip."

I blushed and quickly licked at my mouth. "Are you okay?"

He waved a hand in nonchalance. "Perfect. Let's go to sleep."

I watched him warily as he laid down, pulling the covers up over himself and turning his back to me. I laid down beside him worried that somehow I had hurt him.

Just as I was almost asleep, his hand reached out and grabbed mine.