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Forgotten Maze
A breeze floated over Wade and Laura, and both of them opened their eyes, finding themselves laying at the beginning of a long corridor with tan brick walls with burning sconces attached and giving faint light around them. Both stood, and Laura dusted off her pants before glancing to Wade.
"Do you remember how we got here?" She asked.
"Not at all. Last thing I remember is eating tacos." He replied and looked her over.
"I remember playing war with you, and that is it." She stepped forward and sniffed the air. It was humid and smelled of blood and sweat. "We should see this through by assuming we have no healing factor again."
He gave a shrug. "You know I thought of something while you slept after the last trial."
"What is that?" She asked and took a few more steps forward. She could hear air blowing around somewhere in the distance, it almost sounded like someone was breathing from the pattern she heard.
"We still have to have some of our healing factor or else we'd be dying. You from the adamantium in your system and well me from-"
"We are not alone." Laura interrupted him and took another step forward.
"Then quit walking and wait for me." He commanded and caught up to her. He grabbed her arm and pulled her to a stop before she could move again. "How do you know we're not alone?"
"I can hear heartbeats. A lot of heartbeats." Laura answered.
"They're not more dinosaurs are they?" Wade asked. "Because I don't want to deal with them again."
"This hallway is not large enough to hold a dinosaur unless it were those Eoraptors, and then they would not stand still and wait for us to come to them." Laura explained.
"You know it's a good thing you're not a parent because you'd be terrible at comforting your children if they had nightmares." Wade crossed his arms in front of him. "At least this time, I have some guns not just my katanas."
"I was not aware that parents did such a thing." Laura didn't even spare him a glance, only her response showed her recognition of what he said. "Let's go. We need to get this over with."
"Nothing like ripping off a band-aid. They always lie and say it will be painless when it really hurts like hell." Wade commented and followed just behind her.
"You should try your best to remain silent." Laura cast him a sideways glance.
"How silent are we talking, like Spiderman silent, Batman silent, or you silent?" Wade asked.
"We are trapped in a tunnel in which we can see no end or no escape. It is so dark we can barely see what is ahead of us, and we know we are not in here alone. You should emulate one of your victims and do not make a sound." Laura commanded in a lengthy answer he didn't expect.
"I can try, but I can't promise anything." Wade closed his mouth and began humming again.
"If it wouldn't kill you, I would cut out your vocal chords." Laura muttered and faced forward again before they continued walking through the dark corridor.
About fifteen meters ahead, the hall ended and turned to the left. They began to step around the corner when Laura halted and grabbed Wade's arm and pulled him to a stop as well.
"Can't you hear that?" Laura asked as she sniffed the air, meeting a rancid odor.
Low grumbling breaths reached them, and a scuffling sound echoed their way too. Laura grabbed the burning wood from the wall sconce and tossed it down the darkened hallway. As the fire flew fifteen feet away, it lit a low glow on a large grotesque beast with bare yellowish skin and sharp teeth dripping with saliva. It's enormous body took up the hallway with only an inch wide on either side allowing it movement. And after being hit by the flaming stick, a low grumble sounded as it took a heavy step forward.
"At least we have guns and sharp objects." Wade commented and took two guns from their holsters.
"We have the upper hand." Laura replied and her claws extended.
"How?" Wade glanced at her, but her attention remained focused on her target.
"He cannot move more than two inches one way or one inch both way, and with his girth that means he will not be able to turn around. We do not even have to kill him, as long as we get by him, we will be safe." Laura explained and then added, "From him."
"Again, you really need to work on your pep talks." Wade turned back to the beast walking toward them with slow steps. He shrugged. "We just have to get past him?"
"If my calculations are correct, and they are never wrong, then yes." Laura nodded.
Wade pointed his guns at the beast's thick arms hanging to its sides. "Okay, you go first."
Wade fired at both his arms, and the creature released a grumbling roar and raised his arms, swiping at the bullets Wade continued to fire. "He sounds like Ol' Wolvie when you wake him from his nap," Wade shouted.
Laura ignored his commentary and ran for the hole between the creature and the wall. The beast saw her coming and let Wade continue to fire while he reached down to swipe at her. Laura leapt over his arm and kept running. Once she was behind him, she turned on his back and began clawing at him. The beast roared again and tried to reach behind him to grab her, but his arms wouldn't fit. Wade took the opportunity and holstered his guns and brought out one of his katanas. He ran up to the beast and continued to run up his large girth and face. He stabbed the creature in the head and jerked his katana free from his brain and skull as he jumped behind the beast and landed beside Laura. He pulled Laura behind with him as the beast teetered and fell backwards, landing just two inches away from where they now stood.
They continued through what they now discovered to be a stone maze, and with no incident for what felt like an hour, they were surprised when they were drawn to a halt by a large chasm. A pillar stood in the very center of the chasm, and when they peered over the edge, it was pitch black, so they couldn't see if it ever ended.
"Ladies first." Wade offered and stepped back.
Laura glanced at him with a raised eyebrow. "I do not understand your statement."
"It is based on chivalry, stating that women always go before the men." Wade explained. "I don't really care about things like that except in these situations."
"You mean in situations where I might die before you?" Laura countered.
"Hey, you're smart. Has anyone ever told you that?" Wade asked.
Laura turned away from him, and without a word or a running start, she leapt from the edge of the floor across the hole. She landed on the pillar and then repeated her leap, landing without issue the second time as well. Wade replicated her jumps, landing just as she did, and when he turned to face her, he was cut off with her stern face.
"You will be going first from now on." Laura commanded, and she turned away from him and continued onward.
"Did you just call me a lady?" He called after her before sprinting to catch up.
"I simply made a statement. It is your choice how you take it." Laura replied without sparing him a look.
He opened his mouth to retort, but before he could, a tall creature stepped around the next corner and stared them down with his black eyes. He was so tall that he had to hunch over, and the back of his head still lay against the ceiling. He had large hands with pointed nails on each finger, and he had a body that reminded the two of a tree.
"I feel like we're in a Lord of the Rings crossover." Wade commented. "Or that with a mix of Harry Potter."
"I do not understand." Laura stepped back with him as the being advanced towards them.
"No one does," Wade looked at her and then back to the monster. "Let's run for his legs."
"Good idea." Laura drew her claws out again.
"What are you doing?" Wade asked.
"We should cut off his legs so he can't follow us." Laura announced.
"Why is that your go to move?" He shouted just as she charged forward. He unsheathed one of his katanas and ran after her. They dodged his large hands grappling for them and ran through his legs, cutting through his thick flesh and bone as the passed under him. He let out a shriek and fell forward, and only two feet behind him was another chasm this one only slightly smaller and without a pillar in the middle.
"We could've just knocked him down and used him as a bridge." Wade shrugged and sheathed his sword.
"It would not have worked." Again without offering anything else in the way of words, Laura ran and jumped across the chasm. Wade followed after her, and they continued on through the maze. They continued deeper into the maze for what Laura counted in her head to be an hour, but they were drawn to a halt by a hall way layered from floor to ceiling in large cobwebs. They stepped forward across the first line of web, and a glob of saliva landed on Wade's shoulder. Laura grabbed his arm and pulled him to a halt, and he looked at her.
"Do not move." She commanded.
"Why?" He asked. Then he followed her line of sight above his head. Spiders almost twice their size covered the webbed ceiling. The arachnids didn't seem to notice them yet, and Laura pressed a finger to her lips to signify silence. Wade nodded and turned to continue on with her following close behind him. They stepped around many webs, and they could see the end of the nest ahead when something made a loud crack beneath Wade's boot. They both looked down and saw the human femur Wade stood on.
"Shit." Wade glanced to Laura, and she pushed out her claws. Spiders leapt from the ceiling toward them, and Laura jumped into action. She hacked at as many spiders as she could, and Wade pulled out a gun and began firing at the remaining spiders she couldn't reach. Twenty-seven arachnids twitched on the ground around them, and they wasted no time in running past the dying bodies to get out of the nest. They'd only found they were plunged into a pitch black corridor as they rounded the corner. It was so dark that neither could see the other. Even Laura's claws reflected no light.
Laura reached her hand out to the black space in front of her body. "Take my hand. We must be sure not to become separated."
Wade nodded in agreement even though she couldn't see him, and he took her hand. "Ooooo . . . I've made it to first base with X-23."
"If hand holding was first base, you would be the only person to have ever made it that far with me." Laura remarked and stepped forward to take up his side as they began walking forward.
"Wait . . ." Wade paused. "You've had sex? Does Daddy Wolvie know? He can't, he'd probably kill the guy . . . or girl. He killed the person didn't he?"
"I do not understand your fascination with this subject." Laura sniffed the air, and something deep within it smelled like the strong odor of bovine.
"How is that not a surprise to me?" He countered without pausing his saunter.
Laura halted Wade before he could waltz around the corner. He cast her a look she couldn't read through his mask, but she simply held up her hand to signify for him to wait. So far, her instincts proved useful, so he submitted. The two waited and listened. Heavy breathing, almost huffing grew closer and with it echoed the click of what sounded like hooves on the stone floor.
"How did a cow get trapped in here?" Wade asked in what he felt was a whisper but was in all actuality a regular tone.
"Shh . . ." Laura replied and stepped behind him to grab the flaming sconce off the wall.
"What are you doing with that?" Wade asked.
Laura responded by leaning around the wall and tossing the torch as hard as she could. It smacked against a solid form and under the glow as it clattered to the ground, Wade and Laura could see a beast of immense size, half-man and half-bull. As the flame died out, the beast set his red eyes on the pair. They jerked back around the corner.
"A minotaur? Could he not think of something more original?" Wade complained. "Like fluffy bunnies with bat wings or turtles with vampire fangs?"
The heavy breathing grew louder and the beast's hooves slammed against the stone floor as he charged down the long hallway. Laura held out a hand. "Give me a gun."
"No. Get your own!" He commanded.
Laura rolled her eyes and ripped two guns from his holster before he could stop her. She shoved one into his hands before leaping around the corner. He followed her, and they both opened fire on the minotaur as it ran toward them. Wade shot at both its kneecaps, and Laura put a bullet between its eyes. Bullets lodged in his chest, and both watched as the wounds ejected the bullets and closed up.
"Good news, Laura! I found where our healing factors are!" Wade shouted.
"Run!" Laura pushed the gun she took back into his hands and darted back around the corner. Wade chased after her while holstering his guns. He caught up to her, and they could hear the pounding hooves chasing after them.
"What's the plan?" Deadpool asked.
"Run." Laura replied.
"I like this plan, but got anything more creative?" He asked.
"Just run and make sure you get across the chasm." Laura's breathing sounded as though she were taking a moonlit stroll.
"What chasm?" Wade asked, still watching her.
"That chasm!" Laura pointed ahead to the rapidly approaching chasm they'd crossed only moments earlier.
"Oh where did that come from?" Deadpool remarked, and he sped up and leapt across with ease.
Laura could feel hot air on the back of her neck when she was still too far from the edge to jump across. A glance over her shoulder and seeing the beast reach out for her, she looked back ahead.
"Jump!" Wade shouted.
She calculated the jump in her head and she knew she would just barely make it, if she made it at all. She allowed herself a quick burst of speed and pushed off from the ground. The minotaur's hand just bumped her leg as he reached out, pushing her off from her trajectory. She knew she wouldn't make it, and she stretched her arms out and caught hold of the edge of the wall. Strong hands grabbed her wrists before she could even catch her breath. Laura looked up and saw the gloved hands clasped over her arms and Wade's muscled arms and masked face leaning over the chasm to pull her up. Laura planted her feet flat against the wall and helped him by walking up the side slowly while he pulled her up over the side. After the reached the top, they fell back and Laura pushed herself off him to lie on the ground next to him while they took the time to breathe.
Their moment of calm was brought to a halt when they heard the scrape of hooves against the stone floor. They both sat up and watched the monster drag his hoofed-feet along the stone and stare them down. Heavy breaths flared out of his nose. Laura and Wade both stood.
"You want this?" Wade shouted, raising his arms in front of him. "Come and get it!"
Laura grabbed Wade's arm and pulled him a few steps back alongside her. The more steps they took, the more the beast scratched at the ground. In what seemed like an unbelievable moment, the minotaur charged forward and jumped across the chasm in a single bound.
"I guess he's more man than cow." Wade commented with a shrug of his shoulders, as if he weren't even impressed. He turned to look at Laura just as the creature began stomping toward them. "So what now?"
Snikt! Laura pushed her claws out. "Attack!" She charged at the minotaur.
"Yay! My favorite part!" Deadpool turned and pulled both his katanas from their sheaths. He advanced forward as the beast seized Laura by the throat and threw her back into the wall. Three loud cracks echoed out, and she slumped to the floor for only a couple of seconds before she was back on her feet as if her spine hadn't just snapped and skull fractured.
Deadpool ran toward the minotaur and before he could bring one of his blades down across the monster, it ripped both from his grip and tossed one behind it and flipped the other around before stabbing it through Deadpool's chest. Wade stumbled backwards, but he could tell from experience that none of his major organs had been punctured. He didn't have time to react as Laura leapt over his head and landed before him. She swiped at the minotaur with her right hand, and he dodged only to find himself slashed in the stomach with her left foot claw. Blood splashed over her face. The beast lowered his head and let out a shriek as he charged towards her, horns aiming straight for her. Laura held her ground and grabbed the horns. She kicked him once in the groin, again in the stomach, and a final kick in the upper chest with her full force, pushing him back so he teetered on the edge of the chasm.
"X, move!" Wade shouted as he pulled a grenade from his belt. She stepped aside without casting him a glance, and threw the grenade at the minotaur. The creature caught it in his cradled hands, and without hesitation, Laura kicked out her right foot and pulled the pin with her claw. Wade finalized the moment by jumping and double kicking the beast in the chest, making him fall backwards down the chasm, while his own sword still stuck out of his chest. He and Laura leaned over the chasm and watched as the grenade exploded, erupting the bottomless pit with fiery light and body parts.
Laura stepped back from the edge and looked at Wade. "We need to get you out of here before you die."
"Why?" He asked and then looked down to the katana hanging out of his gut. "Oh, I don't feel a thing. It's just a flesh wound master."
She didn't respond; only cast him a confused glance.
Wade shrugged and pulled the sword from his chest before replacing it in his sheath. He turned and jumped across the chasm and picked up his discarded sword, replacing it as well. Laura crossed the chasm again, without trouble this time. They continued on through the maze until they reached the hall the minotaur guarded. A large wooden door stood at the end with chains wrapped around the handles.
Upon approach, Wade turned his head to the side. "This is kind of anti-climactic, wouldn't you say Junior Bub?"
Laura looked at the bleeding gash in his chest and raised an eyebrow.
"Well except for the stabby and bang-bang part." He nodded.
Snikt! Laura turned back to the door and sliced the chains free. They dropped to the ground, and the duo pushed the doors open and found their cell waiting in darkened silence for them. Wade entered the room, and Laura turned around and stepped backward into the room, keeping her eyes on the doors to the maze. As she crossed the threshold, the doors ceased to exist. They didn't fade or close or disappear, they just no longer were, as if Laura blinked and they were gone only she could hold no memory of blinking but held every memory of the maze and its events.
