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Chapter 10

The hospital chapel was small but welcoming. Linka blinked to adjust to the scarce lighting and took a seat on a pew close to the altar. The chapel was empty. Her hands were clasped in front of her and her eyes lifted to a statue of Our Lord on the cross. She replayed the events of the last couple of hours in her mind. The Planeteers had all gone in to visit Wheeler before a nurse announced that the room was off limits for the duration of medical rounds. She had assured it would not take long. Minutes later, in had rushed Wheeler's mom, her countenance a mask of worry. They had sat her down and explained the nature of things, watching as she listened quietly while fidgeting with her fingers in her lap. Even though they had met before, Linka continued to be stunned by how much she resembled Wheeler. She had his eyes and lineaments, except that her hair was light brown instead of Wheeler's red. Overall, she was an attractive woman, even though her face told the story of someone who had not lived an easy life. Then, Gi had asked the question that had been on everyone's mind. Where was Wheeler's dad?

"Well, he kind of went into shock when I told him the hospital had called and that it was serious," Mrs. Sloane had explained with a small sigh. "He gets overwhelmed easily. He just needs some time to process things, I'm sure he will get here soon."

Linka had watched her twist her wedding band around her finger, like a nervous habit. She had felt her heart softening for this woman. It was easy to see where Wheeler had gotten his sunny, warm disposition when one met his mother. There were no traces of wickedness or haughtiness in her.

When the nurse had informed them that visitors were allowed in the room again, Mrs. Sloane got up hastily, clutching her purse close to her. Linka had volunteered to accompany her and the older woman had nodded, seeming grateful for the proposal. She had even taken Linka's hand down the hallway. Linka had decided to stand in the doorway as Mrs. Sloane had walked to her son's bedside, allowing them some privacy. Linka had seen the tears that were running down her face as she had taken his hand.

"Oh, Jacob," had been the anguished whisper of a hurting mother, as she brought his hand to her cheek. "Mama's here now, baby. Don't you worry."

Linka had silently made her escape because tears were threatening to erupt on her face once more.

Alone in the chapel now, Linka was thinking about the decision Wheeler's father had taken to not come to the hospital. She knew there was friction between the two. Wheeler never openly talked about him, but when he did, his whole aura changed from day to night. It was hard to believe that things were so dismal in the relationship that a father would not come to support a son fighting for his life.

Linka's thoughts were interrupted by light steps echoing in the silent chapel.

"Oh, I didn't mean to bother you in here, honey. I can come back later."

Linka shook her head at the woman's voice and looked up at her.

"No, please sit down if you would like, Mrs. Sloane." She slid further down the pew to make room for Wheeler's mom.

"Not Mrs. Sloane, just Candy," corrected the woman as she took a seat beside Linka. "I'm not nearly that old, yet. But, gosh, where has the time flown to?"

She sighed quietly and shook her head with a whimsical smile. "It seems like days ago that Jacob was just a little baby in my arms. The first day we took him home, I spent hours and hours just watching him sleep. I remember thinking how perfect he was. I could not believe it for the life of me. I had had a lot of miscarriages earlier and all of a sudden, when I had nearly lost all hope, I had this little miracle to look after! He was the most active baby ever, happy as a clown, too. A handful even then, let me tell ya! Always a handful that one, but, Lord, how I love him."

Linka watched her eyes become sadder as her glance fell on the crucifix up front.

"Maybe God is punishing me for being a bad mother, for not protecting him enough."

Linka took her hand and held it firmly, before speaking with conviction.

"'The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.'"*

Mrs. Sloane turned to Linka, expression surprised. "That's a verse from the Psalms. You are as wise and intelligent as you are beautiful, Linka. Jacob was right."

Linka smiled a little at her words and the two women were silent for a few moments.

"Please know, Mrs. S… ehrm, Candy, I mean, that every time Jacob talks about you, it is with the strongest affection. I believe he would do anything for you. If you really were a bad mother, he would not have turned out as wonderful as he is."

Mrs. Sloane patted her hand and their eyes met.

"Thank you, dear. You are very kind to say that. It's very easy to see why Jacob's in love with you."

Linka's heart began a tribal dance in her chest upon hearing the revelation. Did he love her, then? His mother would not speak with such certainty unless it were actually true. Unless he had told her, or unless she had read it in him, which were equally valid in Linka's opinion.

It was in that dim chapel, holding on to his mother's hand, emotionally exhausted beyond reason but with a new glow in her heart, that Linka realized she was in love with Wheeler.

*Psalm 103: 8 (NIV)

/ ~ / ~ /

It was now going on three days. Wheeler still showed no signs of waking up. The toll it was taking on everyone was starting to show. Wheeler's mom turned out to be heaven-sent. She raised everyone's morale, made sure the Planeteers were eating adequately and even insisted on a hotel room close to the hospital so that they could rest. Linka was the only one who refused to go. She dreaded leaving Wheeler's side for fear he would wake up and not see her nearby. So she made do with little naps on the uncomfortable waiting room chairs, waking up wrapped in a blanket Wheeler's mom had procured from somewhere in the hospital.

Then, suddenly, a mission took shape in Linka's mind. Except it wasn't so sudden because she had been giving it some thought since the arrival of Mrs. Sloane. Linka was not sure what kind of whim it was, but it had to be something strong, since she stepped out of the hospital doors for the first time in days. She quickly stopped by the hotel room to shower and change her clothes, secretly admitting that it felt good. Body and mind renewed, she called a taxi, silently praying for strength on the way over to Brooklyn.

The neighborhood was squalid and heavily spray-painted. Nothing much had changed since Wheeler had taken her here. Linka paid the driver, who kindly told her to take care. It was probably solid advice given her surroundings. She thanked him and entered the apartment building that had once been home to Wheeler. The handrail was broken and missing in places, so she kept her hands in her pockets until she reached the second floor. Linka rang the doorbell while drawing a deep breath. She suddenly wondered what she was going to say. She had not planned an elaborate speech. Nervously, she ran a hand through her long, blonde hair and shifted her weight to her other foot. She tried the doorbell again and waited. There was a slight shuffling coming from inside and, minutes later, the door opened.

Wheeler's dad was tall and bulky, brown eyes lifeless as he stood in the doorway. He was wearing a wrinkled t-shirt that said, "Go, team!" over faded jeans. He appraised Linka and turned away from the door without a word, walking over to the sofa with a slight limp. Wheeler had revealed to her that an accident at work had injured the leg, causing him to lose his job. A baseball game was on television, the volume turned down. There was an uncapped, half-full beer bottle on the coffee table. The surroundings in the small apartment were nothing out of the ordinary, but Linka felt awkward and out of place just the same.

"Hello, Mr. Sloane," she voiced quietly and attempted a smile. "May I come in?"

"Door's open, ain't it?" was the gruff reply.

Linka understood the way things were going to be, and closed the door behind her. She neared Jack Sloane but did not sit down. It was he who, surprisingly, spoke up first.

"How is he?"

He was toying with the remote control in his hands, flashing her glances in between.

"There are no changes," Linka shook her head a little. Then, with a stronger tone of voice, "Jacob needs you."

The air took on a different feel and his head snapped up to examine the girl standing before him.

"The kid's never needed me a day in his life."

"What son does not need his father?" Linka remarked, voice unwavering. "And what about Mrs. Sloane? You do not think she would like to have you by her side at a time like this?"

"I know what I'm doing. It's best to lay low right now."

"That sounds incredibly selfish."

A part of Linka wished she could take back her brutally honest words once she saw the anger that registered on Mr. Sloane's face. But it was too late now.

"Who the hell do you think you are, parading in here, my own house, and telling me what I ought to be doing? It may work on Jacob, he always did have a weakness for beautiful women, but it ain't gonna work on me. He shouldn't have been so careless in the first place. I always told him he was gonna get shot if he stuck his nose in other people's business. It's the way it is around here, Miss Russian Princess."

"Your son's 'carelessness', as you call it, saved a young girl's life!" Linka corrected him, jaw locking in anger at his reasoning.

"How can you sit here and not be worried about his condition? What if he does not make it? How are you going to live with yourself afterwards?"

Wheeler's dad seemed surprised at her outburst and watched the Russian girl with what seemed awe for a few moments.

"I am worried," he blinked, his tone more mellow now. He seemed to appreciate that she had the guts to stand up to him.

"Well, show it, then," challenged Linka, fists balling up at her sides. "I know you and Jacob have had problems in the past. It cannot have been easy. But it is never too late to try and fix things. He wants you in his life. He has never stopped loving you. I made a promise to him. I told him that all the people he loves would be by his bed side, and if you do not come to see him, I cannot fulfill that promise."

Linka watched as he passed a hand over his eyes, then through his receding hair. His face seemed older than its actual age.

"Things aren't that easy."

Linka turned, wordless, and made for the door. It shocked her that he called out to her as soon as she placed her hand on the doorknob.

"Hey, where are you going?"

"Where you should be. Back to the hospital, to be with Jacob."

He studied her further from his seat, arms crossed over his chest.

"You're different from the other girls that used to chase after him. You just speak your mind, don't ya? Don't care about the enemies you make along the way."

"That was not my intent, to make enemies," Linka explained, calmly.

"I love Jacob, and his welfare comes before anything else. I do not care about how I come off."

She took another step towards the door before turning one last time to him.

"Will I see you at the hospital?"

"How are you so sure that's the right thing to do?"

He was not mocking or assessing her, for a change. Linka felt it was a genuine question, one that a lost person pronounces. Almost as if he were asking for her help. She met his glance, standing fearless, and spoke one short sentence.

"For once, put them first instead of yourself."

Linka pulled the door open and exited the apartment, down the staircase and into the street, until she could feel the last rays of the sun on her face. Her heart was filled with the hope of new beginnings, for all.