Not my characters or songs. For Elle. Chele beta'd. MsKathy preread. My thanks to all 3, and my lovely readers/reviewers.

"Jasper!"

"Merry Christmas, Bella."

"Yeah, Merry Christmas to you, too. What's going on? Come in."

I opened the door wider so that he could step into my dad's house and warm up a little. I frowned when he didn't budge.

"I'm sorry, I really can't right now. Jane and I just got over to my dad's to pick him up, and we're headed to my uncle's house. Crazy day, you know?"

"Oh, of course," I replied, a little disappointed that he couldn't stay. We hadn't seen one another since he'd visited Tampa with the band. It felt like a lifetime ago.

"Will you be around tomorrow or the day after? We could do something then." He seemed hopeful but hesitant for some reason I couldn't quite distinguish.

I frowned. "I wish I would have known you were home. I have to fly out tomorrow morning."

"Bad timing," he said sadly. "I just got here last night."

I chuckled humorlessly, but more than anything, I missed him. It was easier to bury those feelings when we didn't see each other or talk much, but being face to face, my heart ached for him to have a more frequent presence in my life. He was just...my Jasper. Being here, back home in Bellevue, reminded me of childhood games in the neighborhood and quiet afternoons of reading and guitar on the back porch. But that wasn't my life anymore, and it certainly wasn't his.

"Well that sucks," I finally offered. "Are you coming home for Lauren Mallory's wedding?"

"I will if you are. Who the fuck gets married on Valentine's Day anyway?"

I burst out in a hard laugh. "Obviously, Lauren. It completely suits her."

"Yeah, it does," he agreed, smiling slightly.

Biting the inside of my cheek, I braced myself for my confession. "Uh huh, so...I'm bringing my...boyfriend. To the wedding. Charlie wants to meet him, and it seems like a good opportunity, so...yeah."

A hard look eclipsed Jasper's previously gentle expression. "What boyfriend?"

"I, uh, we've been dating for a while. I guess it just never came up."

"How long have you been dating him?" His voice was steely, and I sensed a little irritation.

"Since like, September or early October," I offered quietly, knowing I had made a mistake in this situation. "He's a nice guy," I added, as though that would make up for everything.

"Must be, if you're bringing him home to meet Charlie."

I just nodded and shrugged, mumbling some sort of acknowledgement. I knew this had to happen eventually, and to be honest, I wasn't really certain why I hadn't told Jasper prior to that moment. I had convinced myself it was because we didn't talk often, and there never seemed to be a context, especially in text messages, to just blurt out, "Oh, yeah I've been seriously dating someone for months." Jasper was clearly thrown off guard by my news, but it was difficult to tell if he was mad at me for having a boyfriend or hurt that I had kept something from him.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. We haven't talked much and-"

Before I could continue, Jasper waved his hand dismissively and shook his head.

"It's fine. Whatever. I get to meet him in a couple months, so no problem, right?"

His words didn't match the flat tone of his voice as we discussed my current status or the upcoming trip. It made me feel a little guilty for not telling him about my relationship sooner. I honestly couldn't blame him for his reaction; he was supposed to be my best friend, and this was something significant, considering that I was bringing the boyfriend all the way across the country to meet my father and attend Lauren's wedding with me.

"Yup," I replied dumbly.

"Well anyway, I have to go," Jasper said quickly, pulling something out of his coat pocket. It was a thin square, gift wrapped in simple Christmas paper. "I just wanted to drop this off and say Merry Christmas."

I took the gift he had extended toward me and stuck my finger into the seam to pull the paper off. It was a CD.

"Advanced copy," he told me.

A huge smile lit my face, and I bounced a little in excitement. "I can't wait to listen to it! Anything I know on here?"

"Yeah, you'll recognize a couple," he said. His face returned to a softer, friendlier expression, and I was glad we wouldn't be ending our brief conversation on an awkward note. "I'll see you in February."

With that, he gave me a hug that didn't last nearly as long as I hoped it would, and I watched him walk down the driveway and across the yard toward his dad's house. A pang of disappointment burned in my chest, knowing those few minutes were all we'd have on this visit. I hadn't realized how much I'd missed him until I felt the calm comfort of his arms around me. I should have called and made plans with him when I knew I'd be home for the holiday; now it was too late.

Later that day, after Christmas festivities with Charlie and my grandparents, I lay on my childhood bed with Lost Like You's new album playing in my old boom box. I flipped through the little book inside, glancing at song titles and lyrics. In the back, there were lists of thank-yous from all the band members. My eyes immediately went to Jasper's, and instead of a long list of names like the other guys, his was simple.

"Jasper would like to thank God, my bandmates, my family, and most all, Bella. You're the words that come out easy."

I recognized the words of his final statement, but I couldn't quite place them. Where had they come from? Regardless, seeing my name there in his brief thank you made me choke up, and I wasn't quite sure how to process that. Instead of pondering the meaning behind his note, I focused on the emotional, melodic collections of songs on the album and tried to fall asleep.

.

"Please tell me this isn't going to be a Catholic wedding. Ugh, have you ever been to one of those? They take forever!"

I reached over, intertwining my fingers with my boyfriend's and squeezing. "Relax. Lauren would probably burst into flames if she stepped into a church. Apparently the groom's family is loaded because everything is being held at their 'estate.'" I snarked, contorting my voice to a snooty tone with my final word. He chuckled at me and eased up a bit.

"You look hot. Only you would wear red to a wedding."

"Hey, it's Valentine's Day. I'm sure I won't be the only one. You don't look so bad yourself, either."

A few minutes later, we pulled up to the gates of the "Brentonshire Estate" and followed a line of cars to what could only be described as a mansion. Valets were handling the parking for everyone.

After climbing a large set of front steps, we entered the house and came into an atrium where a pre-ceremony cocktail hour was taking place. A string quartet was playing off to one side, and guests mingled throughout the large space.

"Bella!" I heard from across the room, and I looked in the direction of the voice to see Jane practically running at me, dragging Jasper behind her. She was all grown up now, halfway through college, and a beautiful young woman. She waved excitedly as she approached, and when she reached us, she flung her arms around my neck, hugging me tightly.

After she'd thoroughly squeezed me, Jane looked up at my guest, giving him the once over with a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Hey there, hot stuff. Who are you?"

I couldn't help but laugh at her antics as I introduced them. "Jane, this is my boyfriend Demetri. Demetri, this is Janey. She grew up down the street from my dad's. And her brother, Jasper," I said, gesturing toward him.

Demetri was cordial in his greetings, kissing Jane's hand and shaking Jasper's. There was a stony expression on Jasper's face as he looked Demetri up and down, scrutinizing his expensive, tailored suit. I noticed that he wouldn't meet my eyes, and I couldn't figure out why. Jasper was dressed nicely, of course, but his look came off much more casual and cool than Demetri's proper one.

"Can't say I've heard much about you," Jasper said blandly, "but I hope you've been taking care of this one or I'll have to kick your ass." With a wink that looked more malicious than teasing, Jasper placed his hand on Jane's back and mentioned something about finding a seat for the ceremony.

"What crawled up his ass?" Demetri asked.

"Watch your mouth!" I scolded him with a light smack on the arm. "They might kick you out of a place like this for swearing."

His mood lightened immediately as he shook his head.

"Don't worry about Jasper," I added. "We've known each other forever, and he's just a little overprotective. Let's go sit down."

After a reasonably short ceremony, guests were ushered into another part of the house for a second cocktail hour before dinner. It seemed like practically half of Bellevue and Seattle were present, so Demetri and I mingled, saying hello and making introductions to other high school acquaintances. I was not, in fact, the only woman in red, but my sweet talking boyfriend mentioned several times that he thought I was the best looking. I gave him skeptical looks each time, but I really did enjoy the flattery.

Dinner seating found us with Jasper, Jane, and a few other people who had grown up in our neighborhood, and I was honestly amused with Lauren for that. Even though most of us hardly knew each other anymore, the conversations were friendly and light.

As the night wore on and more alcohol was involved, Demetri became more touchy feely. That wasn't anything new to me; he was always a bit more handsy when he'd been drinking. He regaled the table with stories of his lucrative real estate career in the Bay area, selling beachfront properties to retirees, athletes, and other well-to-do part-time Florida residents.

"What about you, Jasper?" one of the other "neighborhood kids" asked at one point. "I'm sure you've met some interesting people while on tour. Any famous celebs or bands?"

"Oh, I'm sure no one wants to hear about me," he replied blandly. "Nowhere near as exciting as our buddy Mit over here."

"Mit?" Demetri asked, glaring at Jasper. Jasper's expression had turned just as hard.

"Well sure, you seem like a yacht club and croquet kind of guy. I thought it might be a more appropriate nickname for you and your golfing buddies," Jasper replied snidely.

"Thanks for the consideration," Demetri sneered, "but Demetri works just fine."

The tension between them was so thick you could have cut it with a knife. Everyone at the table watched the strange spitting contest volley back and forth between the two men. It was perplexing, and I was getting upset by whatever the hell they were up to.

Just then, the band leader announced that all the single ladies needed to go to the dance floor for the bouquet toss, but I stayed frozen in my chair. Jasper turned his face toward me.

"You'd better go, Bella. You and Mr. Perfect might just be next. Go get your bouquet, girl."

Dumbfounded, I stared like an idiot with my jaw dropped open as he pushed his chair back forcefully and stormed out of the dining area. Jane looked helpless and Demetri moved to stand, but I pushed him back down into his chair.

"Just stay here. I'll be back."

Grabbing my purse, I practically ran after Jasper, following him into the atrium. When I finally caught up with him, I grabbed his wrist and pulled on him until he turned to face me.

"What the fuck was that?" I asked, whisper-yelling.

"Leave me alone." His voice was even, but there was anger boiling beneath the surface. I could see it in his eyes, and I wanted an explanation.

"No, I won't leave you alone. You're acting like a total ass, and I want to know what your problem is, Jasper."

He yanked himself free of my hold, walking away from me again and heading for the door. It was cold outside, but I still followed him. I was going to get my answers.

"Go away, Bella," he repeated through gritted teeth. We were far enough down the sidewalk that the valets wouldn't hear us, but his voice was still low and warning.

"No! Not until you tell me what's going on with you!"

He leaned over me, eyes full of anger and frustration. "You want to know my problem? I doubt you really do, but you asked for it. I think your boyfriend is a fucking douchebag. I think he's a cocky dickhead who looks at you like a piece of arm candy and likes the sound of his own fucking voice so much that he doesn't even realize what a pompous ass he is. I think you-"

I'd heard enough. Jasper and I had never fought like this before, and it was too much. He didn't know a thing about Demetri ‒ he hardly knew me anymore ‒ and he actually had the nerve to make such harsh judgments? No fucking way.

"Fuck you, Jasper. You don't know shit. The only reason you don't like him is because he's the exact opposite of you. Demetri is ambitious, he's work oriented, and has goals and aspirations! You think that just because he wears nice clothes and enjoys his career there's something wrong with him, but I think you're just jealous that he's doing something with his life!"

"Jealous? What the hell do you think I've been doing for the past two years? Are you saying I'm not doing anything with my life?"

"Yes!" I yelled. "What are you doing, Jasper? You dropped out of college to fuck around with your band. I love you guys and your music, but is it getting you anywhere? Are you making any real money? Do you have a plan if things don't turn out well? I don't think you do, and that's just fine and dandy isn't it? You're perfectly content to play your guitar, get drunk every night, and fuck your way around the country."

I knew I'd struck a chord because he didn't say anything. Instead, he turned his back on me and walked a few steps away. I watched his shoulders rise and fall with heavy breaths, and his hands went into his hair, tugging at it in frustration. I waited, rubbing my hands over my cold arms, trying to generate some warmth. Finally, he turned around again, but he stayed several yards away.

"You know what?" he began, much calmer than our previous argument. "This is ridiculous. Demetri is a carbon copy of every other guy you've ever dated, so I don't know why I'm surprised. Ivy League Edward, Peter, the future doctor, this guy, and any other boyfriend you've had. They're all the same.

"But don't try to judge me when you have no idea what my life is actually like. You make your assumptions, but when have you ever put forth the effort to really know me anymore? You wrote me off as soon as I decided to pursue the band."

"You're never around," I defended. "We communicate through texts and a few rare phone calls."

"And who initiates those?" he challenged me. "When, in the last two years, have you been the one to call or text me first?"

He was right. As I looked back, I had always thought that he was too busy, so I never bothered, always waiting to hear from him. Still, he had been a complete jerk to Demetri for no good reason. I refused to apologize until he did because he had been completely out of line in there.

That never came, though.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," he said in response to my silence. His anger still lingered, but he looked so detached. I could only watch as he walked over to one of the cabs near the valet station and opened the door. "You're wrong, Bella. You're the one who doesn't know shit."

.

A month later, I received an alert in my email from Lost Like You's blog. A new song had been posted, and even though I hadn't spoken to Jasper since Lauren's wedding, I still opened it and listened.

The song wasn't as smooth and upbeat as their usual style. It was harder and louder, with rougher vocals. The lyrics reeked of bitterness and spite, professing a "you don't know me" vibe.

It was only called "Untitled #6" on the track name, but it may as well have been titled, "Fuck you, Bella."

E/N: "You're the words that come out easy" in Jasper's thank you note is from the song "The Closest Thing" by The Juliana Theory, who I imagine he would be a fan of. No, Bella doesn't make the connection.

And now I'm going to run and hide.