Chapter Nine

"Hello everyone, and welcome to this press conference. I mean, it's right after the last one, at which I've kept you all afternoon while I shrieked into the void, but it is a new press conference, and it is beginning now. Thank you."

The reporters said nothing. No one in the conference, the mayor or the reporters, made any indication that they noticed Leon, Cecil, and Carlos entering the room. They sat near the back as Mayor Pamela Winchell went on.

"As you know, the world is dangerous, and our lives' directives inevitably point us toward the void. The void, into which I have been screaming at my last press conference, the void, to which none of us can escape when we breathe our last. We can all put it off to the back of our minds, but it is coming and coming soon.

"So of course, we, as humans, put it off. We procrastinate death. And I, as your mayor, feel that it is my duty to help you procrastinate. So, citizens of Night Vale, I encourage youth to come to the vacant lot behind the Ralph's tomorrow morning from two to eleven for a free, government-mandated vaccination from the T-Virus."

Leon's heart skipped a beat, and stopped in his chest. The T-Virus here in Night Vale? Surely vaccination from it was proof of its existence here.

"This virus is often used as a weapon, and we don't want one of Desert Bluffs' rivalry pranks to catch us off guard, especially with the high school basketball playoffs coming up."

"What the hell?" asked Leon, to Carlos. "They don't have any priorities here!"

"They do," said Carlos. "Just be happy they're vaccinating, rather than organizing some sort of uncalled for preemptive attack."

"Damn Desert Bluffs," said Cecil, who was seething, fists clenched in his lap, on the other side of Carlos. "Always trying to prank us with deadly acts of bioterrorism." He turned to Carlos. "This'll interrupt your scheduled sleep time, because I'm assuming you'll want to not lose any time in the lab, but I'll wake you up, don't worry."

"It's okay," said Carlos. "This is important."

"This is very important," said Leon. "I fight bioterrorism; it what I do. And the last biohazard outbreak I dealt with ended with a lot of people dead."

"No one's attacked yet," said Cecil. "But knowing Desert Bluffs, they probably will…"

"There is reason for your mayor to do this sort of vaccination on such a large scale," said Leon. "Which means I'm going to have to talk to her."

It was then that the three of them realized that the entire room was completely silent. They looked up from their own conversation to see that everyone, the people from the newspaper, some concerned citizens, and even the mayor herself were staring at them. The three men sat up straight in their seats and did their best not to make eye contact with anyone.

"Oh, I'm sorry," said Mayor Pamela Winchell, sarcasm dripping heavily from her voice. "Was I interrupting your press conference? Please, go on, I'm sure we would all love to hear what you have got to say. That's why we're here, right? To listen to you?"

The three men couldn't find any sort of retort. They sat there, stunned and silent, uncomfortable with the attention that they were receiving. Mayor Winchell stared them down as fiercely as the rest of the people in the room, drumming her fingers on the podium and letting out a low monotonous hum.

"Um, we, uh…" Cecil began to try to speak, but the mayor cut him off, ceasing the finger-drumming and humming.

"Sherriff's Secret Police? Take them to the holding cell downstairs. Make sure that they don't give you the slip." The armed secret policemen surrounded the three men and handcuffed them, leading them out of the room. "I don't want them interrupting any of my press conferences. Ever. Again."

The doors closed behind the guards and their prisoners as she began speaking again to the assembled citizens and media outlets. "When I was in the third grade, I thought it was weird that I…" But her words were cut off when the men were being led away, to the basement of Town Hall.

"Should we try to fight our way out?" Cecil whispered to Leon, out of earshot of the secret policemen who held them. Leon just shook his head, trying to figure in mind if who he had seen at the end of the press conference was the early the woman he thought it was.

Lauren and Daniel sat in the Station Management office. The Seans had left, and Ada had gone to see the mayor's press conference, presumably. Lauren reached under her desk and pulled out a moderate-sized cardboard box, which she set on her desk, between her and Daniel. The box was sealed with packaging tape, and on the side it carried the StrexCorp logo.

"I want you to go to the Town Hall and switch out box 21-B with this one," said Lauren. "It is filled with syringes that look exactly like the vaccines that are already there."

Daniel looked from the box to Lauren. "Why not replace all of the boxes instead of just one? It would ensure that the virus would spread faster, reach more hosts, and there would be no resistance."

Lauren waved away the calculated suggestion. "I don't aim to kill everyone," she said. "Just do as I say, or I'll send you back to corporate for reprogramming."

Daniel stiffened at this suggestion. He took the box and stood up, heading toward the door. "It will be done" he said as he departed, shutting the door behind him.