i suuuuuck. i'm sorry updates are few and far between. it wont hurt my feelings if you wait til this is complete before you read it. i have an out line but i also have anxiety, three kids, school, chickens, cats and dogs... lol

a big thanks to Kim my kick ass beta, who makes me look articulate. she wants more EPOV. i'm gonna try for her.

so on with the show!

Chapter 10

Bella POV

I don't know what my problem is. I keep walking from room to room like an old lady with Alzheimer's. I feel like the minute I say we're good and we leave, I'll remember something that's important and we'll be fucked out of extra batteries or marshmallows or whatever. I take a deep breath after my fourth run through of the dining room.

I stop and look around. I was raised in this house and aside from my brief stint in the college dorms my first go, this is the only place I've ever lived. I feel like I'm saying goodbye to an old friend that I know deep down I'll never see again. Edward keeps reassuring me that we'll be back in a couple of months. He thinks the undead will probably start to just fall apart as they shuffle along. I'm not so sure though.

I saw smoke over the tree line this morning. It's thick black smoke that hangs heavy in the moist air. When the breeze blows just right, I can taste it. Acrid and plastic-y like standing too close to a burning couch. I think the town of Forks is burning down. I'm not sure the flames will make it this far and it rains here more than not but it wouldn't take much with nobody left to stop the bad things. Maybe my old neighbor, Mr. Holmes' gas line blows, who knows…..I'll miss this house.

Before I make my way back to the garage, I lock all the windows, pull all the shades and curtains and lock doors. If the house is still standing I want the contents to be intact too. It makes me think of looters; living like nomads, going through houses for anything useful. People living under some kind of Mad Maxand the Thunder Dome rules or Lord of the Flies or something. I shake my head at myself. I think I watch too much T.V. If I come back and my house is standing but trashed, I'm gonna be super pissed.

Walking into the garage, I can see that Layla's sitting in the driver's seat of the R.V. looking at all the buttons and switches. The look on her face through the windshield tells me she's fighting everything inside her not to touch at least one button. I didn't make it thirty seconds in that seat without turning on every freakin' thing in there when dad brought this beast home.

Edward is securing the extra gas cans to the top with bungee cords. I have to forcefully avert my eyes so that he doesn't catch me openly ogling him as I make my way to the back ladder. We've been keeping it pretty G-rated since this morning. Nothing is normal about our current dance. Love and lust are hard cards to play during the potential end of days. Figures too, he's pretty perfect.

"I know by saying this I'm screwing us out of a box of candles or a plunger or something that I'm gonna remember later, but I think we're all set to go." Edward nods at me and quirks a half smile before starting his climb down from the roof. I blow out a deep breath before climbing into the R.V.

There's barely any sitting room with all the shit we have crammed in here. It looks like a mobile version of a Hoarder's episode. The only room not stuffed with supplies is the bathroom. It's a 3 by 3 space already and I like to pee without being squashed by boxes of bullshit.

As I'm trying to set up a place for Layla to chill out during the ride, Edward makes his way in. "the garage door opener is dead with no power and I'm pretty sure that door is solid wood." I nod my head at him in agreement. It's a really, really heavy door. "We should try to prop it open with a board or something so we can get out, then one of us will have to close it after if you want to keep your house secure, Bella."

Leaving the garage open isn't really an option I'm down with readily accepting. "Well… I can probably kick the board in to shut the door if you wanna drive?" it comes out sort of a question. When I look up at Edward, he's quirking an eyebrow at me.

"How 'bout you drive and I'll pull the board out." I'm not sure if I should be pissed that he doesn't think I can do it and almost say so, but he cuts me off before I can, "I'm just worried that if you kick the board out, the door will break when it hits the ground. I can probably bring it down some with my hands before letting it go."

I instantly get his logic and feel like a dumb ass for not thinking about that. Breaking the door would definitely defeat the purpose of going out in the first place, plus I'd be so mad I'd probably cry. I nod my acceptance of his idea and attempt a soft smile before I make my way to the driver's seat.

I'm buzzing with a mix of excitement and pants shitting fear as we get everything into position. Layla's strapped into her little nook towards the back of the Winnie. Edward's standing by the inside of the closed garage door looking like he's deep into a self-given pep talk. We found a big board left over from when my dad rebuilt the back deck to prop the door open while I drive the RV out.

"You about ready, love?" Edward's got this weird strong but super stressed face on.

"You know what sucks?" I poked my head out of the driver's side window so I can see Edward clearly. He just raises an eyebrow and waits for me to finish. "Besides the glaring obvious?" I pause and wait for the nod I know is coming from him.

I'm totally talking out of my ass right now, I'm so nervous and scared, and not just for me. It bugs me that in all the movies and stuff you never really hear much about kids. I suppose that's some kind of FCC thing or morality thing or whatever. There's this little kid in the back of my RV and I love her. I really do and that probably scares me more than anything. If something happens to Edward, I'm solely responsible for Layla. "It sucks that I'm putting you in danger over a fucking house I probably won't see again." I kind of trail off at the end so I'm not sure if he heard me.

I shake my head at myself and take a deep breath. My heart is heavy; a hard emo heavy that my deep breath doesn't really ease. My dad is dead, my roommate is missing and the only other grown up I know is risking himself becoming a zombie buffet item to save an empty old fucking house.

"You know what Edward?" I take a deep breath. "Fuck it, I'm gonna start the Winnie, you prop the door open then grab the side ladder and I'll book ass outta here. When it's clear I'll stop so you can get in, ok?"

"What about closing the garage door, Bella?" he's looking at me with a mix of relief and curiosity.

"Fuck the door Edward, the connecting house door is locked. It doesn't matter." I'm trying to keep a straight face and failing hard. I can't decide if I want to frown or smirk. Going back and forth must make me look like I'm in the midst of a seizure. Edward nods with a look of thanks and I nod in acceptance.

Turning my attention to Layla, I notice she's coloring on the back of some random papers she's found. "Love, you ready?" She looks up, innocent and wide eyed and smiles at me nodding her head. I'm not sure she sees the danger past the adventure. I hope we can keep it that way for a while.

Everything's in place. The keys are in the ignition and Edward is in position waiting for the signal. I'm trying not to hyperventilate. I've only driven the R.V. a hand full of times so my biggest worry is I'll gun it to hard and Edward won't be able to jump onto the ladder. I'm at least grateful it's an automatic. I need to chill out. We've been keeping an eye on the front yard and stuff and haven't seen a single dead guy, but that doesn't really mean shit if they're shuffling around in the neighbor's yard behind the shrubs.

"Ok Bella, on the count of three, I'll lift the door and you throw it in gear. Sound good?" I nod and try to still my shaking hands as I fire up the engine.

"1….2….3!"

The door goes up, Edward grunts from the excursion of holding the beefy door up and fumbles with the board as he jams it into the tracks. I step on the gas and we bounce out of my safe haven. I don't look to see if Edward grabbed the ladder. If I do I'll panic if I don't see him. Once the rear wheels are out of the garage, I give her more gas and we tear out of the driveway.

I don't slow much turning out of the driveway and a bunch of crap starts tumbling to the floor of the Winnie and bouncing around in the back. I'm glad now we had the forethought not to put anything but clothes and pillows around where Layla's sitting. I definitely hear shit breaking as some of the boxes hit the floor behind me. Layla sounds like she's on an amusement park ride the way she's squealing and giggling. In a way it takes the edge off the stress in my head.

Just as I have the wheel straight and am on the road accelerating. I look in my mirror, finally, to make sure Edward's hanging on. He's there; I see a strong arm and a little of the side of his head. Before I can turn my attention to driving I see a sight I was pretty sure I'd never see come flying towards us from the rear. "Oh my God!?...It's Jake!"

I immediately slam on the brakes and almost choke myself out with the seat belt strap. The tires squeal and I'm about positive I hear Edward's body slam into the back of the Winnie so I cringe a little. When we finally stop, I look back to make sure Layla isn't bleeding to death in a pile of broken jelly jars. She looks perfectly fine. So I smile and laugh. "My friend Jake's here!" Before she can answer my seatbelt is off and I'm flying out the driver's side door. I'm out of the Winnie in time to see Edward rubbing his shoulder, but standing strong in front of Jake's rabbit.

I never thought I'd ever see that rusty piece of shit, or its driver ever again. All at once I'm bawling like a baby and running full throttle toward my childhood best friend.

"Nee-Nee!" It comes out in a desperate squeal-scream as I slam myself into his hard chest. He's barely unfolded himself from the car but manages to catch me.

"Jesus-glitter-loving Christ, busy! Where in the flaming fuck have you been!" his words are soft but laced super heavy with worry and relief. He holds me tightly and I'm glad or I would've crumpled to the ground. I can't answer him around the sobs so I don't try. After several minutes, I finally start to calm down. I lifted my head and find Edward sitting on the Winnie's steps with Layla awkwardly waiting for me to come back out of my breakdown.

"I've been busy Nee-Nee."