A/N: Our next applicant is Rameau. Good luck.

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the bitchin' plot.

Granny May watched with a diligent eye as the new girl rolled out the dough for the pie. "Are you sure you've had no baking experience, Deary?" she asked sweetly.

The young woman shook her head. "Not professionally, Ma'am," she answered. "I would help my mum a little bit though, when I was younger."

The elderly woman patted her shoulder affectionately. "You're doing fine, Sweetie," she said with a smile. "I'll have to send those nice people at the staffing firm a box of homemade donuts to thank them for you."

"Thank you, Ma'am."

"All right," Granny May said, walking to the back with her cane. "If you need me for anything, just hit the intercom button and I'll be right out. I've going to go take some pain medication for my poor old knees and rest a bit."

"Yes, Ma'am."

Granny May disappeared into her office, leaving the temporary helper to handle the small bakery, aptly named 'Granny May's Bakery'.

As soon as she bolted the doors to her office, Granny May tossed her cane aside and slid the photograph of her late husband (who are we kidding; the picture came with the frame!) and placed her thumb on the print scanner, granting her access to her secret conference room. Granny May was not a sweet little old lady with gouty knees. No, she was in actuality the head of a rag tag group, intent to take out ShinRa.

Scanning the faces around the rich mahogany table, she nodded when she saw everyone present. Mary, the bio-hazard specialist; Clark, the electrical engineer; Michael, the one obsessed with lethal bacteria; Vernon, the muscle; Jessica, lab student, interning at ShinRa Labs; Eric, assistant teacher at Migar University; Sam, martial artist and paedephile; Jenny, the mathematician; and Granny May herself, the one who had brainwashed all these promising people to do her bidding to exact her revenge on ShinRa.

But what reason did Granny May, seemingly sweet little old lady who ran a bakery have to destroy ShinRa? Simple; Rufus' father broke her heart, some thirty years ago. Now, she was going to break everything he had worked for.

Each member of her rag tag organization contributed to her plan. Mary, Michael and Jessica were the ones developing the special 'yeast' she used in her special batch of donuts she sent to the ShinRa building everyday. The bacteria and other toxins were in small enough amounts that they could not be detected easily and would gradually kill anyone who consumed it over a set period of time, that time having been determined by Jenny and Eric. Vernon and Sam provided protection for Granny May and her other cohorts as they set this plan in motion. And Clark...well, Clark was Granny May's son, so she had to give him something to do.

For a week now, Granny May's Bakery had been delivering 50 dozen of the deadly donuts to the ShinRa building, and getting paid for it! Within the next two weeks, the more feeble of the employees consuming the toxic treats would start to show symptoms of the poisoning; though it could not be traced to one single factor. The symptoms would be flu like in nature, starting with aches and nausea, then escalating to searing pain and finally death. Once the symptoms began, it would start an unstoppable chain reaction that could not be treated. The company would actually eat itself to dealth.

No wonder gluttony was a sin.

Granny May had only just hired an apprentice baker to actually see to the real part of the bakery. Revenge was not her main priority. There was gil to be made, after all.

"So the symptoms should begin showing when?" Granny May asked, setting herself down at the head of the conference table.

"As soon as 7 days, no later than 14," Jenny replied. "That's when the aches and nausea will begin."

"Good," Granny May said, a sinister smile covering her pale dry lips. "This plan is genius."

Vernon sniffed. "Mmm," he said, drool slipping down the side of his mouth. "Granny, what's that good smell?"

Granny May breathed the air in as well. "Oh, that must be the pie my apprentice is baking," she said proudly. "Smells like she's doing a damn good job."

Everyone breathed in deeply, enjoying the smell of the freshly baked apple pie. One more deep breath, and every head around the table hit the mahogany with a thud.

Back in the kitchen, the apprentice baker closed the air conditioning vent and smirked, glancing up at her two customers.

"Good morning," she said cordially. "How may I help you today?"

The women in their immaculate black suits smirked. The first one, her red streaked dark brown hair falling over her shoulders hopped on the counter. "Let me taste your wares," she teased.

"Show me first your penny," the apprentice teased back.

The second, a red head, emptied her pockets. "Indeed we have not any," she laughed and the other two joined her. "We don't get paid till next week."

"Status, Ram?" Kandi asked.

"The baker's been butchered by the candlestick," she said, gesturing to the air conditioning vent. She shrugged. "Well, the toxin was in solid form and looked similar to a candlestick. I'm not good with nursury rhymes."

"Doesn't matter," Katrina said, hopping on the counter next to her partner. "So, Granny May's dead and gone. Pity. I liked her donuts."

"Yeah, when they weren't poisoned," Kandi said, snatching a jelly filled treat. She was about to take a bite. "This one isn't...is it?"

Ram shook her head, her blond hair falling out of her ponytail. "Nope, I made that one," she grinned.

"Sweet."

Tseng entered the bakery just then, glaring at them. "I'm assuming that this break indicates the problem has been dealt with?" he asked sternly, though his eyes were twinkling with merriment at the sight of three of his newest Turks.

"Done, Sir," Ram said, removing her apron and leaping onto the counter between the other two. "Nine corpses await your approval."

Tseng's lips twitched at the corners. Katrina laughed. "I think you made the bastard smile!" she said.

"Impossible!" Kandi said, strawberry jelly staining her lips. "Tseng doesn't smile. He glowers, scowls, smirks, scoffs, sulks..."

"I do NOT sulk," Tseng sulked.

"He's sulking now," Ram said with a grin.

"All right," Tseng said stepping to the counter and lifting each girl down to the floor. "In the car. We need to be gone before the clean up crew gets here."

Each girl planted a kiss to the Wutain's lips as they passed him, laughing as they did. Tseng actually did smile at that. New recruits were actually...fun.

Especially these three...his little Amazons.

Mission Report: Targets eliminated by implantation of lethal toxin in building's ventilation system

Turk Assigned: Ram

Status: Rookie

Specialty: Science, hacking, locks, undercover ops, language specialist, death by sex (aka Black Widow Syndrome), martial arts

Target: Granny May and her Syndicate

Dealth by: Inhalation of Deadly Toxin

Mission Complete

A/N: Ram and Katrina are my Amazon Sista's, so that's why Katrina and myself are in here with Ram. Review! KD Zeal...your next!