AN: Hello and welcome to The Adventures of Puddin! I'm so sorry for my absence. This took a long time to get right and I have had writer's block with all of my other stories too. However, I have to inform you guys that I will be taking part in NaNoWriMo this year, so no chapters whatsoever in November. As an apology, I am making sure every one of my stories gets an update this month. Thank you so much for following my fever dream of a fanfic and I hope you enjoy the new chapter.

As always, eternal thanks to my lovely beta, annbe11 (who is writing a Tiger's Curse fanfic called Tiger's Circus so if there are any Tiger's Curse fans out there be sure to check it out cause it's really good. Yes! Most subtle of plugs!)

Chapter 10 – Vile Nemesis! Notice me, Villain!

Four weeks after Christmas…

The morning had come to Conton City, as well as a new school day at the Time Patroller Academy. Students of all shapes, sizes, and colors flocked through the gates of the Academy, prepared to learn even more about what it meant to be a Time Patroller and defend the very timeline itself.

And then there were some who were dragging their feet, knowing the lectures would leave them bored out of their skulls.

Dailli was most assuredly in the latter group.

The male Earthling yawned as he walked the last few streets to the Academy, scratching the back of his neck as he went. He'd been up late playing Duty Calls with his buddies and had barely gathered the energy to leave his apartment. He tugged at the collar of his school uniform and readjusted his bandanna, reassuring himself that he could at least catch a few winks during class.

When he turned the last corner before the Academy, however, he froze.

"No fucking way…" he said to himself.

Standing right outside the Academy front gate, dressed in a school uniform, was that Demon Girl. His vile nemesis. Puddin.

It had been a long time since she humiliated him at that baseball game. Since then, Dailli had thought about her often and about the great vengeance he would visit upon her. Finally, he would have his chance.

Dailli ducked back behind the corner and peeked out, watching her closely. The girl in question was standing in front of the gate, but she made no move to enter. If anything, she looked like she was stuck in place. She even looked like she was trembling a little.

Dailli smiled.

This is perfect! She's clearly distracted. If I defeat her right now, I can prove that I am truly the superior fighter at this school. Everyone will fear my power.

Dailli smiled at the thought.

She'll be completely demoralized and humiliated, she might even give up on being a Time Patroller entirely! Hehehe- the hell is HE doing here?!

While Dailli had been plotting to himself, Paata had arrived at the school gates and came up behind Dailli's nemesis. Paata had a small smile on his face as he reached Puddin's side.

"Hey Puddin," he said. The girl didn't move. With a look of confusion, he slowly reached out to her. "Puddin?"

The moment Paata put his hand on Puddin's shoulder, she let out an ear-splitting yowl and leapt nearly twenty feet in the air. As she came crashing down to the ground, she was panting, almost hyperventilating, as she turned to stare at Paata. He stood there with his hands on his hips, giving her a flat look.

"A little high-strung, are we?" he asked. Puddin sheepishly looked at the ground and shuffled her feet. She looked kind of… cute when she did that.

Dailli grit his teeth, suppressing any thoughts relating to considering Puddin 'cute'.

"Sorry Paata," she said. "I'm just a little nervous. Y'know, first day of school and all."

Paata gave an understanding nod.

"This is big for you, I know, but It won't really start until you actually walk into school."

"Yeah," Puddin said, blushing a little. "Okay… okay, I think I'm ready."

Together, they crossed the threshold of the school gate. Dailli darted forward, taking cover behind the gate and watching them as they made their way down the path to the front door.

"This isn't so bad," Puddin said, looking a little less nervous. "Maybe this is going to go just fi-"

At that moment, a hoverbike crashed straight down into the grass in front of the school and deposited a green-haired Earthling male dressed in an unkempt school uniform out onto the paved path. He rolled across the ground before landing in a sit and shaking his head to dislodge a small cloud of smoke and dust that had clung to him.

Oh god dammit, thought Dailli. Why did it have to be Cray?

As soon as the new arrival caught sight of Paata, he practically teleported to the Saiyan and grabbed him by his jacket.

"Tell me you saw it!" he said, looking frantic.

"Saw what, Cray?" asked Paata.

"There were two naked ladies on the Space Internet!"

Dailli had to stop himself from slamming his head against the school gate. This idiot was so goddamn stupid.

"Um… that's called porn," said Puddin. "It's been there since the dawn of time."

"No!" shouted Cray. "These two were famous!"

"For what?" asked Paata, despite looking like he wasn't really looking forward to an answer.

"For being naked!"

So goddamn stupid. This time, Dailli did slam his head against the gate.

For a moment, Dailli was distracted. That was the moment when Puddin made her move.

"Look!" she shouted, pointing off to the side of the school. "An obvious distraction!"

"Where?!" said Cray, looking in the direction she had pointed.

Dailli also looked in that direction, but there was nothing there out of the ordinary. A student named Turrip was indulging his hobby of flipping off the giant dragon in the sky, but that was nothing new.

When Dailli looked back, Puddin and Paata were gone.

He blinked. He blinked again.

"Dammit!" he roared, slamming his fist into the grass. She'd pulled the wool over his eyes and slipped right out of his hands.

Truly, she would prove herself to be a cunning foe.

Luckily for Dailli, he only had to wait another two days before he crossed paths with Puddin again. It was the start of Timeline Studies, which was right before lunch and his favorite class to nap in. He was quite surprised to walk inside the classroom and see Puddin sitting eagerly in the front row. He gritted his teeth and was about to scream out a challenge at her when the teacher strode in and ordered them all to take their seats.

"Now, class," the teacher, an old and wrinkled Namekian, said, "we will be talking about the various alternate timelines and time warps you will have to contend with when you become full Time Patrollers. The challenge, however, is knowing what does and does not need to be fixed."

Dailli was only half-listening to the teacher drone on and on. He was focused on Puddin, trying as hard as he could to defeat her through sheer thought. Why was she just ignoring him like this?

"Mister Dailli," said the teacher, jolting Dailli back to the present, "could you please explain to us the difference between a Canon Timeline and a Non-Canon Timeline?"

"Um… uh…" he stammered. "Uh, one of them has more… cans?"

Anger burned in his gut as students began to snicker around him. The teacher sighed.

"That was… actually, no, Mister Dailli, that was not close. Not close whatsoever. I suggest you read the homework twice tonight to make sure it gets through." He turned to the rest of the class. "Does anyone else know the answer?"

Instantly, Puddin's hand was in the air.

"Yes, Miss Puddin?"

"A Canon Timeline is what we associate as the normal flow of the universe as the Z-Fighters battle against threats to Earth," she said with a smile. "A Non-Canon Timeline, however, is made up of changes in the timeline that have naturally reached a state of balance with the Canon Timeline. These are including, but not limited to, the invasion of Earth by Lord Slug, Goku's battle against Cooler, and that entire Broly debacle. It's not part of the Canon Timeline, but it won't throw the universe out of whack if it randomly pops up."

"Excellent answer, young lady! Most excellent!" He turned to the rest of the class. "Make sure you make note of that. Non-Canon Timelines can be seen as a benign time warp that doesn't put the universe at risk."

By now, Dailli was shaking in his seat, his teeth grinding together in rage. Suddenly, he slammed his palm down on the desk and shot to his feet.

"YOU THINK YOU'RE FUCKING SMART?!" he bellowed. As the class jumped at his outburst, Puddin only gave the barest of glances before turning back to the front of the class. "LOOK AT ME WHEN I-!"

"Mister Dailli! That is enough!" shouted the teacher. "Leave my classroom!"

Dailli grimaced but did as he was ordered. He glared at Puddin as he walked past, but his nemesis didn't even look up as exited the room. When he was out in the hall, he smiled to himself.

"Ha! She's so intimidated, she can't even look me in the eye! My victory is assured!"

"Son, you need to stop talking to yourself," said the janitor at the end of the hall as he mopped the floors. Dailli ignored him and leaned against the wall.

As time passed, Dailli decided that now would be the perfect time to prove his superiority in combat. He would challenge Puddin as soon as she emerged from the classroom. With his plan in mind, he stood against the wall and waited. He didn't move a muscle for a whole hour.

When the bell finally rang and the students began filing out into the hall, he stayed in place. All he had to do was wait. Any moment now…

Puddin was the last person to leave the room, no doubt sucking up to the professor, and she started walking down the hall. Her eyes skated right over him as she went on her way. He stalked after her, managing to make it a few steps and opening his mouth to call out his challenge when…

"Puddin, hold on!"

An instant later, something slammed into Dailli and sent him skidding across the floor and into a wall.

"Whoops! Sorry kid."

Dailli looked up to see Master Punohsa standing where he had been. The Majinn instructor was dressed in her normal ninja garb with a bag hanging from her shoulder. She turned from him and faced Puddin.

"How are you today, Puddin?" she asked.

"Doing good, Master," Puddin said with a smile. "I think I'm really getting the hang of things and I'm doing well in my classes."

"Great to hear, Puddin," Punohsa said with a smile. She reached into her bag and pulled out a cloth-wrapped bento box. "I made you a lunch, Puddin. I want to make sure my favorite student gets nice and strong so she can be an awesome Time Patroller."

"But I made my own lunch," protested Puddin.

"I've seen your lunches, kiddo," Punohsa said with a smile. "They're about three-quarters candy. You need real food." Puddin, looking a little crestfallen, nodded and took the bento box.

"Thank you, Master Punohsa," she said, managing a small smile.

"Hey, wanna come eat lunch with me?" Punohsa asked with a grin. "I'm about to go eat with my friend Taino. You can ask about her Time Patroller missions."

"Taino?" asked Puddin with stars in her eyes. "As in Commander-Taino- of-the Taino-Force Taino?"

"You bet."

"Nyah! I'd love to!" cheered Puddin. The Majiins departed, with Puddin bouncing down the hallway before turning around the corner.

Dailli lay where he had fallen and growled to himself.

"One day soon, Puddin," he swore. "One day soon…"

Dailli crouched down behind a brick wall encircling a cafe. He had woken up early today to ambush Puddin on her way to school. He had also chosen this exact spot because it was on her route to school. This time he wouldn't allow pesky students or pesky school officials to interrupt his battle with his rival.

This time she would acknowledge how much stronger he was than her.

Another waiter came over in a pathetic attempt to take his order, but Dailli growled and made shooing motions at the waiter until he left. Dailli's eyes never left the street.

He would be ready this time.

At last, at exactly thirty-three minutes and twenty-seven seconds after seven o'clock, he saw Puddin come around the corner at the end of the road. She was now only three blocks away. As soon as she came close, he would lunge from his hiding place and take her down before she knew what hit her. He smiled as his foot began to tap in excitement.

There is no way this could possibly fail, he thought to himself as he readjusted his orange bandanna. Puddin is mine.

Just then, the sound of a whirring engine came from somewhere nearby. He blinked in surprise before looking around in confusion. There were no cars on the road. Where was the noise coming from?

Dailli finally thought to look up. Unfortunately, he was too late.

CRASH!

A large green time machine suddenly landed on top of him, making the surrounding bricks and concrete crack and buckle. It came to rest before the glass dome opened and a strange figure jumped out.

He was a member of the Freeza race, but there was something odd about him. Something almost… gooey about his body. His horns were small black spikes atop his armored white cranium. He wore black pointed shoes, billowy white pants, a red spandex shirt with a white armored breastplate, and bright pink gloves with a neon green wristwatch. There was also a sword sheathed across his back. He looked around the street, his face looking panicked.

"What year is it?!" he demanded of the various cafe patrons.

They were all so surprised by his sudden appearance that they all just stared at him. He grabbed at his horns in such a way that would have been hair-pulling if he had any hair to speak of. When he looked toward the market plaza, however, he froze as he stared at the giant statue of Demon God Dumplin.

"…Only one statue?" he breathed. His face suddenly became panicked again. "Crap! Too far!"

With that, he jumped up into his time machine and revved up the time engine. In moments, the device had vanished. It left behind some smashed bricks, a shallow crater, and a severely bruised Dailli.

"…Ow," he whimpered.

That moment, Puddin walked past the cafe. She smiled and hummed to herself as she continued her way to school, blissfully unaware of what had just happened.

Dailli moaned as he slowly dragged himself out of his crater. First he had to deal with interfering students, then it was interfering teachers, and now it seemed that the universe itself was conspiring against him.

"No… matter…" he said to himself as he managed to start crawling down the sidewalk as people stared and made way for him. "I'll have my battle. I'll have my vengeance. It's just a matter of time."

It was a Saturday afternoon as Dailli crept through the bushes of the suburban area of Conton City. Keeping an eye out for any security cameras, he made a dash forward out of cover before flattening himself against the wall of a house. He smiled to himself as he began to crawl along the side toward a nearby window. Finally, this was a plan that would work. It had to work.

The house in question was the home of Dumplin and Puddin. After his disastrous attempt at ambushing her on her way to school, he thought that it made much more sense to challenge her after school hours. He could knock on her door, or maybe kick it down if he was feeling dramatic, and challenge her to a battle. It would be over in moments, and he could hold his head high knowing that he was the most powerful fighter in the City.

He reached the window and carefully peeked inside. He had a view of the kitchen and a tiny bit of the living room beyond that, but there were no signs of life. A second glance, however, showed there were moving shadows on the wall of the living room. There was definitely someone in there, but he needed a better view. He lowered himself back down and continued creeping along the side of the house.

He could feel his excitement growing as he came closer to the window. This was the moment. He could feel it.

When he reached the window, however, he hesitated. He could hear an odd sound from inside. It sounded like… panting? As well as… creaking? He inched forward and peeked inside.

On the couch in the living room, there was a large blob of… something. The formless mass was shifting around as well as expanding and contracting at a rapid pace, almost as if it were breathing. It looked vaguely like someone had mixed together scoops of slightly melted Earl Grey and strawberry ice cream. He strained his ears, trying to hear any more sounds from inside.

"Oh… yeah… like that… right there… ah!"

Dailli felt his face start to heat up. He had spent enough private time on the Space Internet to know what those sounds were. But… how? What? How?

Suddenly, the lock on the front door clicked, causing the blob to freeze and the sounds of pleasure to stop. The door creaked open, allowing Demon God Dumplin to walk inside and flick on the light. He looked at the panting blob and froze.

"Puddin?" he asked.

With a slurping sound that almost turned Dailli's stomach, the blob separated into Puddin and Cupcake. Both were staring at Dumplin and neither had a stitch of clothing on them. Puddin blushed dark gray and grabbed a nearby blanket to cover up. Cupcake, meanwhile, seemed to feel no such inclination and just smiled.

"Hey Dumplin," she said. "What's up?"

"Uh…" the Demon God said.

"Daddy," squeaked Puddin, suddenly looking anywhere but him. "We were… um… we were just… uh-"

"Stop," Dumplin said, closing his eyes and holding his hand up to stop her. Puddin fell silent. "Just answer a few questions for me. Question one, are you both doing this because you want to?" After a moment, they both nodded. "Good. Question two, is anyone getting hurt by you two doing this?" They both shook their heads. "Good, that's all I needed to know. I don't need to know anything else. I don't want to know anything else. If you'll excuse me, I am going to find a barrel of water to shove my head into and scream for a while. Good day, ladies." With that, he closed and locked the door.

There were a few long moments of silence.

Suddenly, a pair of yellow arms took hold of the back of the couch. A yellow Majiin, equally as naked as the other two, crossed her arms on top of the couch and rested her chin on them.

"Well," said Captain Taino, "that was awkward."

Puddin let out a loud groan as she covered her face and curled into the fetal position.

"Oh my god, I want to die!" she wailed. "He's never going to be able to look me in the eye again."

"Puddin, this is your dad we're talking about," said Cupcake, who honestly looked like she was enjoying this a little too much. "He's the Demon God. If anyone's not likely to judge you, it's him."

"My life in this city is over," Puddin moaned. "I'm gonna need to move to an Apocalypse Earth just to get away from everyone." Cupcake and Taino shared a look.

"I think we need to distract Puddin from her problems, Taino," Cupcake said.

"I reckon we do, Cupcake."

Together, the two Majiin girls managed to roll Puddin into an upright position, where Taino grabbed her hands and held them firmly against the couch. Before Puddin could give a word of protest, Cupcake started tickling her, filling the room with high-pitched laughter. Eventually, the tickling stopped and the interactions became much more… sensual.

Dailli didn't like this. He didn't like this at all. His eternal rival was in there, and he was out here. He hated watching this, but he found himself unable to move from his hiding place. He simply stayed frozen where he was, watching what happened inside.

"Ahem," said a voice behind him. Dailli's hair stood on end before he cautiously turned. Dumplin stood behind him, glaring angrily while drumming his fingers on his crossed arms. "What in the fifteen hells do you think you're doing?" He sounded calm. Scary calm.

"I…" said Dailli. "I thought there were only nine hells."

"I made six extras," said Dumplin, grabbing a fistful of Dailli's shirt. "Would you like a tour?"

"Um… I'd prefer not," Dailli whimpered.

Dumplin's eyes narrowed as a circular black portal opened in the air right behind him.

"Too bad," said Dumplin before he turned and heaved Dailli into the portal.

Darkness.

Death.

Pain.

Despair.

Mimes.

These were the only things surrounding Dailli. His agony was unending, his consciousness infinite. He didn't know where his body ended and his mind began. Pain was life. Life was pain. He begged mercy from the uncaring void. He confessed his sins to the silent gods. Nothing changed. There was only torment, only darkness. His world burned. His world froze. His world became nothing. He became nothing. He was surrounded by-

Grass?

For the first time in what felt like an eternity, there was light behind his eyelids. The first attempt to open his eyes blinded him, but his eyes soon adjusted, allowing him to recognize his surroundings. He was in the bamboo forest of Conton City, on the other side of the city from Dumplin's house. He allowed his hands to skate over the grass, marveling at their softness and how they didn't burn his flesh from his fingers. For the first time, he truly felt at peace.

"Did we learn a lesson?" a voice asked. Dailli looked up to see Dumplin staring down at him.

"It… it was awful," Dailli rasped. His mouth was dry from endless screaming. "It never ended. My agony was the equivalent of a thousand times a thousand deaths. An eternity of torment has-"

"You were only in there for eight seconds," interrupted Dumplin.

"…What?"

"Eight. Seconds," Dumplin said slowly. "And you got off lucky because I'm not in the mood to do any lasting damage to you. Be warned, though. If I find you peeping on my daughter again, I'll leave you in there for an hour. Clear?

Dailli stared blearily at him before giving a small nod.

"Clear."

"Good," said Dumplin. Like that, he was gone, leaving Dailli alone in the forest.

"…I want my mommy," he whimpered.

The setting sun seemed to set the sky aflame as it dipped below the horizon. The roof of the school building was turned a bright orange as Dailli stood in the center. His back was ramrod straight. His eyes were closed. His breathing was even. His arms were crossed. While the previous experiences had been traumatic and painful, they had only made him stronger. They had been the crucible that reforged him into an unstoppable force.

He would not be denied his destiny. Today was the day. This time, his challenge would be assured. This time, nothing would go wrong.

"Any moment now…" he murmured to himself.

The roof access door creaked open, drawing his attention. Puddin walked out onto the roof before giving Dailli a strange look. A sheet of paper with pronounced fold lines was grasped in her hand. Puddin tilted her head quizzically at him before lifting the note and reading.

"To my eternal rival, the time has come for our fated battle to finally commence. No more shall the universe drive us apart and no more shall we ignore this fire of battle between us. Meet me on the roof of the school at seven o'clock and we shall end this dance for good. Sincerely, your nemesis." She glanced up at Dailli for a moment before looking back down at the paper. "P.S. - You smell nice." She gestured with the message. "Yours, I presume?"

"Indeed," Dailli said, uncrossing his arms. "At long last, my great and worthy opponent, we shall have our climactic showdown. One will show themselves as the superior warrior, and the other shall show themselves to be nothing more than a pretender." He shifted his feet, dropping into a martial arts stance. "Now, we face each other, to put this glorious rivalry to a close, once and for all! What say you, vile nemesis?! What say you now?!"

Puddin blinked for a long moment before cocking her head quizzically to the side.

"Who are you, again?"

Dailli felt something break inside of him. His arms fell to his sides and he dropped to his knees. He felt a lump travel up his throat. All attempts to hold it in were useless and he burst into gushing tears.

"You… *sniff* you don't even… know me?" he asked between sobs. Puddin, looking more than a little uncomfortable with this situation, shook her head, sending Dailli into another bout of sobs. "But… but I was so sure… I thought that… that fighting you would…would…"

"Hey, now," Puddin said gently, taking a knee next to the crying man. "It's okay," she soothed, rubbing his shoulder. "It's okay." Dailli let out a few hiccuping sobs before he looked up at her, tears still streaming down his face. "You're okay," she said with a smile.

"No… I'm not…" he whimpered.

"Of course you are," she said. "You're training at the greatest combat school in the entire universe, preparing for the most important job in the cosmos. We're crazy strong already, and we're only going to get stronger from here. It makes no sense to have a 'climactic showdown' before we even reach our peaks, right?"

"I… I guess so," he sniffled.

"See?" she said, beaming. "You are okay. And now you need to promise to get even better at being a Time Patroller. What do you say?"

Dailli took a few deep breaths before wiping his eyes of any remaining tears.

"I say…" he swallowed. "I say that I will work hard to become as strong as I can. I say that I will become a powerful and decorated Time Patroller by the time we face each other."

Puddin smiled, and for a moment it seemed as if the entire world became brighter. Dailli's heart fluttered.

"And I promise to smash you into the ground when that time finally comes," Puddin said. She gave him another pat on the shoulder before standing up. "I need to head home, actually. Dad's making a macaroni casserole seasoned with the tears of young children. I definitely can't miss that." She lifted off from the surface of the roof and waved to him. "See you later at school," she said with another smile before flying away.

Dailli knelt on the roof for a few long moments. Slowly, he lifted a hand to his chest, feeling his heartbeat. It was slower now, but he knew what he had felt.

"My heart flutters when I am close to her," he said quietly to himself. "When she is close, the world seems… brighter. More happy." He lifted his eyes and stared at the setting sun. "Is this… can this be….rivalry?"

For a moment, there was only the sound of the wind.

"BAH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!"

The evening calm was shattered by deep, roaring laughter. Confused, Dailli looked in all directions, unable to find the source. Then he thought to look up.

The Sky Dragon to the north was laughing at him.

"Ha ha ha… Yeah… yeah, kid," it said through it's laughter. It raised a giant claw to wipe at his eyes. "That's exactly what rivalry is like. Hoo boy, are you right! Ha ha ha… ahhh." It turned it's glowing gaze toward him and gave a smile with teeth the size of skyscrapers."Thanks, pipsqueak, I needed that."

"Go ahead and laugh!" Dailli shouted up at the dragon, "You would never truly understand." He put a hand to his heart and gave a small smile. "For the sake of my rivalry with Puddin, I will train twice as hard and twice as long from now on." He laughed a thrust his fist into the air. "I will become an eternal rival truly worthy of her! That is my vow as a Time Patroller! My vow as a warrior!"

There was a pause for a few moments before the Sky Dragon seemed to smirk and nod at him.

"Well, then," it said, "I guess you better get to work kid."

With his spirits soaring high, Dailli nodded to the Dragon before he made his way home and crawled into bed.

"You better get yourself ready, Puddin," he said with a smile as his eyes closed. "I will make sure that our battle will be legendary."