Shibara1310 skips in, oblivious to the fact that there is something wrong…her couch isn't there…neither is the wooden chair, but lo and behold, there's a director's chair instead! Shocking…you wonder what this could mean…Shibara opens her book and flips a few pages before sitting in the chair with a megaphone in her lap.
Shibara: Okay…well, today we are having the Christmas play! Yay! It might be short because I'll have a few characters narrate and yet act out scenes from The Nativity Story, which is my favorite Christmas flick besides Elf.
Silence….
Shibara: All right…well, first we're going to have a discussion, special guest Rufus and updates! Then we'll end with the Christmas Play and truffles.
Disclaimer: Shibara1310 owns NOTHING!
O Come All Ye Faithful
Shibara: Dang…
Zack: What is it?
Shibara: I had a day…whew…
Genesis: What happened?
Shibara: Well, first I have to explain something.
Zack: Like what?
Shibara:…
Cloud:…
Pikachu: -sneeze-
Genesis:…
Zack:….SAY IT, DAMMIT!!!!
Shibara smacks him: You will not cuss in this chapter!
Genesis: He already did.
Shibara: Oh…well…if any of the characters cuss during this wonderful chapter, you'll get thrown out of the window!
Zack rubs his jaw: Ouch…what window?
Shibara: The magic window…
Cloud:…okay….
Shibara: Now, first I will say what happened at school, what I found when I got home, and an update on my story. Then we will do the Christmas play! Warning: This chapter may not be that funny…
Zack: None of your stuff is funny.
Shibara: Is too.
Cloud: Is not.
Pikachu: PIKA!!!!
Genesis: Is not….
Shibara: Is too!
Cloud: Is not!
Shibara: IS TOO, IS TOO!!!!
Zack: IS NOT!!!!
Shibara: Wooooooooo, ve, vroooom!!!!!
All: O.o….
Shibara: FRIED GRASSHOPPERS!!!!!!!
Silence…..
Zack: Wow, I think she's lost it….
Shibara: I have not!!!!!! Burn the Furbies!!!! And Pluto is a planet!!!!
Genesis: Pluto? I thought that was just a hunk of space matter that scientists confused as a planet….
Zack: No, it's a moon…
Cloud: …it's an illusion….
Shibara: You're all out of it…I personally don't know….
All:…..
Shibara:…I have a spider on my computer named Sweeny Todd.
Zack: What kind of weird name is that?
Shibara: Hey, I wanna see that movie!!!
Genesis:…doesn't it have Johnny Depp in it?
Shibara: Yes! He's a good actor…acting wise…I don't know him personally, so I can't say anything about him.
Cloud:…okay…
Shibara: Yeah. Well, that movie is rated 'R' and it's a musical…
Zack: You hate musicals.
Cloud: You even hate 'The Sound of Music'.
Shibara: I DO NOT!!!!! I just don't like the songs that much…as much as I adore music and ahem certain artists….::stares at Genesis::…I can never watch a musical unless it makes sense…
Genesis: Um…like how?
Shibara: Like 'The Phantom of the Opera'!
Zack:….but 'The Sound of Music' does make sense…I mean, the title? Duh?
Shibara: Have you even seen it?! The woman sings randomly! Who sings about 'Fa so, do, re, lo, do'?
Genesis:…you did not get that right…
Shibara: Of course not! I meant to get it wrong! Now, onto our first topic: School.
Zack: Oh yeah, what happened at school?
Shibara: First we need to have everyone here. You three macho men are just here to start off the chapter.
Genesis: Ah…
Sephiroth enters: Do I have to play the shepherd…and carry a lamb?
Shibara: Uh huh!
Sephiroth: Why can't it be a stuffed lamb? I hate animals…
Shibara: You hate all living things. Why else would you want to destroy the Planet and kill everything? You psycho maniac….
Sephiroth: …I don't like you…
Shibara: Well, that's obvious. Where's Yuffie and Vincent?
Sephiroth:…
Shibara: Does anybody need to hear me ask again?
Zack: They were on a date last night.
Cloud: Yeah…
Genesis: Totally….
Shibara blinks: Okay, well, it's a whole 'nuther day.
Sephiroth:…maybe they're sleeping in late?
Shibara glares at him: I won't ask what you mean, but I hope they'll be here on time…
Aeris enters: Why do I have to play Mary? Why can't Tifa and Cloud be Mary and Joseph? I have too many lines to memorize!
Shibara: Well…make up some lines!
Aeris:…all right…
Kadaj enters, flipping his hair: Sephiroth, you need to dry clean your clothes once in awhile…
Shibara: Ah, Kadaj, I see you're here….now, you're the wise man with the frankincense. Got it?
Kadaj: Franchise, right?
Shibara: No.
Kadaj: Franken..franken…cents?
Shibara: Yeah! You got it! Well, it's the closest you can get…
Tifa enters: Where's Rufus?
Shibara: How rude! You enter without saying hello, and you demand to know where your rich snobby boyfriend is? How inconceivable!
Tifa: Hello Shibi…now, where's Rufus?
Shibara: He'll be here.
Cloud:…..
Shibara: You say something, Chocobo?
Cloud: No…
Tifa: I have no lines! All I have to do is stand beside Cloud as he answers the door!
Shibara: Yep! Now shut up…
Tifa:…
Pikachu: Pika-chuuuuuu!
Shibara: Oh right!
Yuffie enters: Owwie…
Shibara: Got a migraine?
Yuffie: Uh huh!
Shibara: Suck it up, you're still playing the shepherd boy.
Yuffie pouts.
Vincent enters: What do I do?
Shibara: You, my dear vampire, have the gold.
Vincent:…
Shibara: Yeah…hang on a sec…
Zack: What?
Shibara: Where's Reno? If that apivorous zincous is slacking off, he's in major trouble…though he's not a major character…
Reno enters: Yo, wassup, everybody?
Shibara hits him across the head: You're late!
Reno: I was sleeping in late.
Shibara: How come everyone is sleeping in late….Oh, like totally coolness!
Genesis:…what?
Shibara: I found a wallpaper on By the way, thanks punkiemonkie for telling me about it! I got a desktop for my computer!
Cloud: What is it?
Shibara: Well, when one looks at it, it has the background of Aeris' church with Aeris in the front…
Aeris blush: Aw, I'm touched!
Shibara:…hot Zack in the front, kinda standing behind her carrying his bad…boy sword…
Zack: I could tell you almost said something else…
Shibara: Shut up! I just don't want to kick myself out the window…
Tifa:…what window?
Shibara ignores her: And our sweet Cloudy-pooh off to the side!
Cloud:….
Shibara: And Sephiroth is off to the other side behind Zack and Aeris…
Sephiroth:…must….kill…..sheep….
Shibara: Huh? You say something?
Sephiroth: No.
Genesis: Hey, how come you don't have me in there?
Shibara: You are in the picture.
All:….
Genesis: I don't see myself…
Shibara points at the very top of the right hand side: There! You're sitting on the rafter!!!
Genesis: Oh….
All: Oh….
Shibara: Ooooooh, weeeeeeeeeeohhhhhhhh, vooot vooot!!!!!!
All: Ooooooh, weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, ohhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!
Shibara takes a picture with her cell phone: Wow, you should see the looks on you guys faces….I'll post it on my MySpace blog!
Zack: Oh gross, you have a MySpace?
Shibara: Yeah, I'm going to delete it once I get my phone back.
Genesis:…you have your cell now…
Shibara: Oh, heh heh, whatdya know? I'm dreaming right now and I totally dream about getting my baby back…
Cloud: Your baby?
Shibara: Yeah, you know, like how you call Fenrir your baby?
Cloud: Shut up…
Tifa snorts.
Cloud:…
Shibara slaps Tifa: Your hurting his feelings!
Silence…
Shibara: Okay, now onto school…
Yuffie: Nyuk nyuk! What happen? Let the Great Ninja Yuffie know!
Reno: Zutto, what happened to Fugly?
Shibara: Well, it was the last hour of school and a lot of kids were driving home. Endlesshorizon, forgiven4ever and I were walking in the hallway when we saw these guys hiding in one of the empty classes!
Genesis:…oh really?
Shibara: Yeah! We all watched through the window as Fugly went to his car. He was so pissed when he started up his engine because the students from a certain class stuffed shredded money in his air conditioning unit.
All:…
Vincent: The point?
Shibara: It was soooo funny! His car is his baby! Like my phone is my baby, and Fenrir is Cloud's baby.
Cloud:…
Shibara: Goot, Pottah, now grrrrrrrrrrab da sneeeeeetch!
All: O.o
Shibara: I swear, haven't you ever seen Harry Potter the Chamber of Secrets video game? It's hilarious! I like mimicking them in a German accent!
Zack: Okey dokey.
Shibara: Yeah. You know, most people think I look Italian when they first meet me….
Genesis: Weird…
Shibara: Yeah, especially since I have no Italian blood in me.
Cloud:…weird…
Kadaj: Has anybody seen mother?
Silence…..
Shibara: Ho hum, let's get on with this…special guest, Angeal Hewley!
Angeal: Zack.
Zack: Yo ki!
Angeal:…Hold fast to your dreams….
Zack: Mah?
Shibara: Whoah, random Japanese lines from Zack the Puppy, okay, yes….Angeal is the angel!
Angeal shows his white wing: Apparently…
Genesis:……
Shibara: Well, sorry, Gackt-look-alike, at least you're considered the 'Guardian Angel' in my freaking story!
Genesis: Oh yeah…
Shibara: By the way, I need to introduce Cloud in my story…
Zack: Yeah, you're gonna have me in the next chapter…
Shibara: Yeah….now, who wants to start the play!
All:…
Shibara: Hrmm, I take your silence as a yes, Shibara the Great, we accept with gratitude! Now, it'll be short…it ain't a big deal, kinda like how the Thanksgiving play was, okay? Good! Let's start! You guyses thoughts on it?
Zack: Let's mosey!
Cloud: I can't help anybody…
Genesis: Fear me if you dare!
Shibara: Okay…oh! Punkiemonkie gave me the best icon ever of Genesis with that line!
Silence:….
Genesis: Hrrm, cool, now you have me on your icon…
Shibara: I wuv it!
Pikachu: Pika, pika, pika!!!!!!!
Reno: Zutto…
Sephiroth: I hate sheep…
Kadaj: Franchinsince…..isly?
Vincent:…
Yuffie: Lalalala!
Tifa: Where's Rufus?
Enter Rufus: Yo.
Shibara: There, now shut up….
Aeris::sighs::…
Zack:…
Shibara:…
Cloud:…….
Sephiroth:….can I carry my sword?
Shibara: Instead of camels, we have chocobos…
All: O.o;;
Scene One…Shibara stands up and clears her throat: In this scene, the angel comes to Mary, who is played by Aeris, and tells her that she will bear a child with the name of Jesus! She tells her parents and Joseph, who is played by Zack, is mad, though later that night he is visited by the angel as well!
Aeris: Ho hum, I'm tending to my garden…
Angeal enters the stage: You will have a baby boy who will be named Jesus!
Aeris:…Cool…but there's a problem!
Angeal: What?
Aeris: I'm not supposed to be married to Zack, I mean 'Joseph' now!
Shibara: Exactly. That's why Mary is scared! Now, we'll cut to the part when Joseph and her parents find out, but we'll have Rufus playing Aeris' dad.
Rufus:…
Aeris: Oh, okay…ahem…Dad, I'm pregnant.
Rufus:…
Zack: What am I supposed to say?
Shibara: Why me? Okay, you get all pissed off and ask who's the father!
Zack: Oh…okay….how did you get pregnant?
Aeris slaps him: I still say that's perverted!
Shibara: Your line! Dang it…
Aeris: I was visited by an angel of the Lord! And he told me I would give birth to a boy named Jesus! A virgin's birth!
Zack: Oh…
Shibara sighs: In the movie, they still didn't believe her…
Zack: I don't believe you!
Shibara: Though he didn't say it flat out…
Rufus: Oh, what a shame you have brought on the family…::bows head::
Aeris:…sorry?
Zack: I will call this child as my own!
Shibara: Cut!
Aeris: Did I do okay?
Shibara: I swear, did you even read your lines? And Zack…go get acting lessons, you suck! Rufus was the only one doing it correctly! Gosh…
Rufus: Heh…
Zack: Hey, I can't help it! I don't like acting!
Aeris:…
Shibara: All right…now we're moving onto the next scene, which will be in Bethlehem!
Genesis: Why? I mean, that's at the end of the story! And you left out a lot of stuff!
Shibara: Well, we don't have time! Besides, I still have announcements to do!
Zack: Oh…
Scene 2: Zack and Aeris are at the stable with the baby doll, Sephiroth and the rest of the shepherds come in with the flock of sheep, the wise men come in on their chocobos, but first we'll have a short scene with Zack and Aeris knocking on the inn's door. Okay? Good!
Zack knocks the door with Aeris sitting on a black chocobo. Cloud opens the door.
Cloud: Yes?
Zack: Do you have a room for two?
Shibara: No! It's 'do you have any available rooms'! It's not like Joseph and Mary have a choice, you know!
Zack: Oh…scratch that, do you have any rooms?
Cloud:…
Tifa enters with a provocative t-shirt: Nope! But you can take the stable!
Shibara: Tifa…
Tifa: Yes?
Shibara: Mind my language, but what the hell are you wearing?
Tifa: What, I like it!
Tifa's shirt was white with a picture of Rufus on the front with black lettering saying 'Rufus ShinRa: Making Wheelchairs Sexy Since 2005!'
Shibara: Whatever…back to the story…Mary and Joseph reach the stable and Mary gives birth to Jesus!
Aeris: Yay::Holds baby doll::
Zack: Ahem…
Sephiroth, Reno and Yuffie enter…with no sheep…though Yuffie is carrying a stuffed animal that resembles something of a horse…
Shibara: Sephy, where are the sheep?
Sephy:…..
Shibara: Where. Are. The. Sheep?
Sephy:…
Shibara: Need I repeat myself?
Reno points across the room: There.
Apparently, Sephiroth ran all the sheep through with Masamune.
Shibara: SEPHIROTH!!!! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!!!!!!!
Sephiroth runs off, leaving Reno and Yuffie.
Shibara: God, he's gonna get it….look! He left a whole puddle of blood! Oh wait…
Reno: What, Zutto?
Shibara: We can eat barbecued lamb for the Christmas dinner!
Yuffie: Yummy! What does it taste like?
Shibara: Chicken.
Yuffie: I love chicken!
Shibara: Anyways…
The wise men come in on chocobos!
Genesis: Ahem…here's my gift of the Goddess! I mean, myrrh!
Vincent:…Gold….
Kadaj: And FRANKENSTEIN!!!!!
Shibara: It's frankincense, you dimwitted oncubourous!
Vincent's Chocobo: WARK!!!!!! Wark, wark, wark!!!!!
Shibara: Oh God, take me now!!!!
Zack: Can we just end this?
Shibara: Sure, whatever…
Rufus: Thank goodness…
Tifa: …::sighs::…
Cloud:…
Shibara: Hrrmm…now, let's go onto the awards!
Pikachu: Pika!!!!!
Shibara: No, Pikachu, you did not win the singing awards…
Pikachu:…..
Zack: Wow, that's the first time I heard it go silent….
Pikachu: Grrrrrrr……PIKA!!!!!! –jumps on Zack-
Zack: Ow, ow, get this frickin' thing off of me!!!!!
Shibara: I'll think about it. Anyways, the winner is….'Tifalicious'!!!!!
Tifa: Oh joy…
Cloud: I'm thrilled.
Shibara: Yup! Special thanks to punkiemonkie for the vote! You get a Zack plushie! Cloud, too, if you want him…
Cloud:…
Shibara: Hee hee…now, the next contest is the hottest guys awards! I will list the following…
Cloud
Zack
Kadaj
Genesis
Sephiroth
Vincent
Rufus
Reno
Yazoo
Loz
Cid
Reeve
Barret
….and any other guys I missed…
Zack:…Why on earth are some of the other characters on here?
Genesis: Yeah, we never see them on here…
Shibara: I'd thought it'd be fair! Send your vote on a review! You can vote for more than one character. I'm voting for four characters, and I ain't saying who!
Kadaj: I know!
Shibara: Shut up! Anyways, I know it wasn't that funny…Sorry…I'll try better next time! I don't own Tifa's T-shirt. I saw an icon on photobucket that said that…anyways…review please! Thanks!
Next chapter: Zack gives Shibara a piggy back ride and we talk more about Advent Children! Plus, Tifa has a surprise for us all.