Chapter Nine - Torpor
"Miss Granger?" I hear a voice call through the haze. "Miss Granger?"
I wriggle in my seat and groan in protest.
"Miss Granger, you'll have to wake up. Everyone has left, and I still have to contact a certain Mr Thomas about a hippogriff and his grandmother's false teeth before students are to be in their common rooms for the night."
I open my eyes slowly.
"Alright there, Miss Granger?" Madam Pince asks me, as I rub my eyes wearily and yawn.
"Just got a few things on my mind, that's all," I reply, beginning to gather my books into a neat pile.
"I can tell." Madam Pince states bluntly, smiling weakly.
"How?"
"Well, you've never fallen asleep in the library, Miss Granger. Never." Madam Pince taps the table I'm working on with her long nails. "Now, come on, it's almost nine o'clock. You've got lessons tomorrow and you need to get some sleep."
"I think I've had enough of that. . ." I mumble under my breath, hoping Madam Pince hasn't heard me.
She appears not to as she continues speaking to me.
"If there is an important or tedious essay you have to complete, then feel free to return in the morning, though, Miss Granger." Madam Pince continues kindly, opening the door of the library for me (my hands are occupied by a mountain of books) as she smiles. "Okay?"
"Sure, Madam Pince." I answer, returning the smile.
As Madam Pince closes the door behind me, I begin walking down the corridor and spot Harry at the end of it chatting to a Ravenclaw.
"Harry!" I attempt to wave at him, forgetting my hands are not free to do so, and the books I am holding tumble out of my possession and land in a messy heap on the floor. I sigh and roll my eyes, before I kneel on the ground and start to pick up the books. I hear footsteps and they grow louder as the amount of books on the floor decrease.
"Hey Hermione," I hear Harry say above me. I raise my head and smile at him. "You didn't visit Ron earlier...are you alright?"
"I'm fine, Harry," I reply, finally collecting the last book and standing up. "Just got a bit sidetracked earlier. Sorry." I yawn again. "Is Ron okay, though?"
"Um, yeah. He wasn't very talkative, but he didn't seem too drowsy or anything, either, so that's a good sign, I suppose." Harry holds out his arms and raises his eyebrows. "Want me to carry any of those books for you? They look really heavy."
They are, indeed, incredibly heavy, but I shake my head, assuring Harry that all the books are as light as a feather, - even if they don't look it.
"We'd better get to the common room, then," Harry says. "Filch will be out patrolling the corridors the moment the clock strikes ten, and I'm sure right now isn't the best time to get a detention. What with Ron and everything. . ."
"Harry, no offence, but I hardly think Ron will notice we're not there. He can't remember what happened last week, let alone that we'd be the kind of people to visit him every day." I interrupt Harry rudely, rolling my eyes as I finish my sentence. We begin to walk down the corridor and towards Gryffindor common room.
"It didn't seem like that this evening, to be honest." Harry comments, chuckling lightly. He grabs one of my books out of my arms, flips it in the air and skilfully catches it as gravity's pull drags it to the ground.
"How do you mean?"
"Nothing, nothing." Harry says, shaking his head. "We'll go see Ron straight after our last lesson tomorrow, yeah?"
"Okay. I think I have some homework to complete, so maybe I'll have to meet you a little bit later than that."
"Hermione, you aren't trying to avoid seeing Ron, are you? Because you can just say - don't try and dodge the subject. You can tell me anything, you know that." Harry pauses on the spot and I do the same.
"No, that's - that's not it, Harry. I told him I'd go visit him tonight but I forgot to because I had an essay to write for tomorrow. Is that alright?" I snap. "I don't see him for one evening and suddenly I'm trying to avoid him? Why would I do that? He can't remember you either, remember? It isn't like I'm the one on the spot here! Honestly, why does everything have to have a reason behind it? Maybe, just maybe, I was slightly tired and I had piles of homework to complete and decided to go to the library to finish it? Of course that wouldn't be it, would it? That's way too simple!"
Throwing all my library books to the floor in rage, I storm off, leaving Harry standing in the deserted corridor with the books surrounding his feet randomly. Suddenly, I feel absolutely terrible.
-
Why do I act like that? I may get upset and angry sometimes, but there is never an excuse for treating my friends like that. It's hardly ever their fault (unless it's Ron and then, in that case, it always is) so what is the point? I'm wasting my breathe lecturing on about something that I could've prevented happening myself.
"Miss Granger, is there something troubling you?"
If this is another adult or teacher planning to have a long, tedious heart-to-heart with me, then so help me –
"Nick!"
I go to stand up, ready to give Nick a hug, when I realise the obvious - he's a ghost. Sometimes I have these idiotic moments. I just choose to hide them well.
"Miss Granger, I see you've been sitting out here for the best part of an hour. Is there anything wrong?" Nick - Sir Nicholas de Mimsy Porpington to others - asks, floating over to me carelessly.
"No, there's nothing wrong, Nick. I think it's just the stress of the upcoming exams." I lie, biting my lip nervously.
"You've always been a worrier, Miss Granger. It's a habit you must kick someday." Nick begins, grinning at me knowingly. "Live every day like it's your last; don't worry about the small things - it's pointless."
But this isn't just a 'small thing'. Ron can hardly remember me, Harry is starting to get suspicious and I don't see how I'll be able to concentrate on my schoolwork while this is all occurring.
"I know, Nick, but I can't help it."
"Something more than schoolwork and exams are troubling you, Miss Granger. What is it?" Nick scratches the seam in his neck that connects the latter to his head. "I won't tell anyone, Miss Granger. The living are ever so eager to learn the secrets of the dead, but I won't tell a soul."
"A soul?" I giggle.
"I won't tell a soul, Miss Granger. Neither a ghost nor human will know of your troubles." Nick says. "But I always find it best to share things with others - it won't do you any good to keep it all bottled up now, will it?"
My chin trembles.
I want to cry. I want to cry so much that my breathing is caused to halt. I want my stomach to tie itself into a thousand knots in anguish as tears roll down my cheeks. But the problem is, once I've started doing what I have wanted to do for so long, I won't be able to stop.
As I gaze away from Nick, I notice the sun is only just rising. It's almost laughable how beautiful the sunrise looks while I'm on the verge of tears. The weather can't mirror my mood; it decides to mock me instead.
"Ron - he - I can't -" I stumble through my words, trying to find a possible way to explain my situation without giving away my secret. Nick may believe telling them cleanses my soul, but I think otherwise.
"Ah, yes, I've heard of Mr Weasley's unfortunate predicament. I can imagine how hard that must be on you and Mr Potter right now." Nick says sympathetically, clearing knowing what I'm trying to say. "But you can't let that get you down. I hear he hasn't forgotten everything entirely; that's a good sign, surely?"
"S'pose."
Nick wiggles his neck around slightly as I stand up. I've been sitting outside beside the lake for the past hour and my toes are starting to get slightly numb, so I decide to retreat indoors. Even if I have to be in the company of Lavender, I'll be warm at least. On the outside, anyway.
"I should be heading inside. I've got lessons today and I've got - I have something to do. Thank you ever so much, though." I say to Nick, as he nods his head and floats away, leaving me to walk back to Gryffindor Tower by myself.
-
"Are you sure?"
"Of course I'm sure! Obviously if it isn't okay with you, I'll not do it. It's up to you, really."
"No! No, Hermione," Harry shifts in his seat slightly. "I have no problem with you using it. I'm just - you would be breaking a few - and by a few. . .I mean several more than that - school rules doing that, and I want to make sure you're sure."
"Just give me the damn cloak, Harry," I chuckle as he passes me his Invisibility Cloak with ease. "and I'm still sorry about how I treated you yesterday, by the way."
"Hermione, you've already apologised about five thousand times." Harry sighs. "Stop it; it's fine. I command you not to say it again!" Harry waves his wand in my face.
I raise my eyebrows.
"That extra homework is really going to your head, isn't it?"
Harry shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly with a smirk on his face.
"Teaches me not to transfigure Malfoy's greasy hair into a lampshade in Charms, then, doesn't it?"
I roll my eyes and, at that, I wrap the invisibility cloak around my body tightly, concealing me. Then I, in the literal sense, disappear into the night.