I meant to update yesterday, but I had a forensics tournament. Our school got third place out of about fifteen, so, yeah, that was good. Unfortunately it also threw me majorly off. Anyways, here's the next chapter of this giant thingy.
During the two weeks that Albus was secluded in the hospital wing there were as many theories and rumors flying around about what was the matter with him as there were gossips in Hogwarts. Of all these there were only a few that hit even close to the truth, and some that attached Albus's "disappearance" to the other curious things that had been happening lately in the strange way rumors do. For instance, a particularly creative Hufflepuff claimed that the Albus in the hospital wing was a decoy and that the real Albus had run to the Forbidden Forest to help the centaurs in their war. Thus it became popular opinion among certain groups that Albus was the instigator of the War of Goland and had gone to the hospital wing because of a rare centaur-born disease.
James had immediately gone to Frank after the scene in McGonagall's office, mostly because Frank was one of the few people both he and Albus were friends with. As James told his story Frank had grown more and more distressed. When James had ended his dramatic tale Frank had jumped up and immediately went to the hospital wing. He had requested to see Albus, but Madam Pomfrey had refused, saying that Albus could not be seen under any circumstances. Centaur disease theorists rejoiced. As for James, he was forced to consider the possibility that he had just lost a good friend.
How was Albus during this brief period? Though his condition can be truly assessed by no one other than himself, a conversation between Madam Pomfrey and Headmistress McGonagall can reveal it at least partially. It had been a week since Albus had been admitted to the hospital when Madam Pomfrey marched up to McGonagall's office for the requested report on Albus's condition. McGonagall looked up as soon as Pomfrey walked through the doors.
"How is he, Poppy?" she said. "Is he any better?" Madam Pomfrey shook her head.
"When he isn't on the potions he doesn't respond to anything at all," she said. "I'm afraid this is quite out of my field of experience, Minerva. I respect the fact that you don't want him to miss school, but he's missed a week already and I'm no closer to helping him than last Friday. You have to admit that St. Mungo's is better equipped to help the poor boy. They may have gotten results by now." McGonagall sighed.
"If we move him, I'll have to really write his father," she said.
"You mean you haven't?"
"Well, strictly speaking, I have," said McGonagall with a small, tired smile. "I told Harry his son had gotten a superficial injury and that the letter was rather a formality-"
"You lied to his family?" gasped Pomfrey. McGonagall waved her hand absentmindedly at the astonished nurse.
"I made sure that Harry wouldn't rush over here like the hot-headed idiot he is," she said. "I certainly don't want to hurt Albus any more than we already have, and an interrogation by his father would only complicate matters." Pomfrey nodded reluctantly.
"What of St. Mungo's?" the nurse said. "I don't think there's anything more I can do for him here. He really should be with professional healers. I can recommend him."
"St. Mungo's is the last place I want him to go," said McGonagall darkly, "but I must say I'm inclined to agree with you, Poppy."
"So I should send the director an owl?" said Pomfrey, already standing up from the chair. McGonagall held up her hand in the universal stop sign.
"Not yet," she said. "Keep him in the wing for another week. Do what you can for him. If he hasn't improved the least bit I shall write to St. Mungo's." Madam Pomfrey nodded sharply then began to stride out of the room, but before she reached the doors there was a tentative knock from the outside. The two witches exchanged a puzzled look, and then Madam Pomfrey opened the doors to reveal Frank Longbottom. His eyes flickered from McGonagall to Pomfrey.
"Am I interrupting something?" he said in his low, measured voice.
"Um, absolutely not," squeaked Pomfrey. "I was just going to be leaving." She scurried out of the office, letting the doors bang shut.
"Interesting," said Frank, looking thoughtfully after the nurse.
"Why are you here, Mr. Longbottom?" said McGonagall. Frank turned to her.
"Oh, I'm just here to request information on a friend," he said. "All Pop- Madam Pomfrey will tell me is that he is not to see anyone."
"He?" said McGonagall, hoping that Frank wasn't talking about Albus.
"One Albus Potter," said Frank. "I believe you know him."
"H- he is indisposed," said McGonagall. "He cannot see visitors at this time." Frank's black eyes studied her like an interesting sample under a microscope.
"How?" said Frank.
"How?" gasped McGonagall, a bit stupidly.
"How did he come to be in such a… position," Frank said. "I saw him only the night before he was sent to the hospital wing, and he seemed perfectly all right."
"So he didn't tell you?" said McGonagall, finally recovering a measure of control over herself and the situation.
"Tell me what?" said Frank, not sounding at all concerned.
"So he hasn't told you," said McGonagall, relieved.
"Told me what?"
"I am not at liberty to tell students that, Mr. Longbottom." Frank stood still for a moment, musing, and then a tiny smile curled into existence on his pale face.
"How about a fellow professor, Minerva?" he said softly. McGonagall tensed.
"What did you say?" she snapped. Frank slowly stepped forward, his cloak billowing behind him much as it had in his former life. Never before had he seemed so much more Snape than Frank.
"You know what I said, Minerva," he whispered. "I believe introductions will be unnecessary."
"I don't believe this," said McGonagall flatly. "This is understandable in Mr. Potter, but not in you. These absurdities must come to an end."
"What at first appears absurd may, in fact, be perfectly reasonable if you were to take the time to listen, Minerva," said a snide voice behind McGonagall. The head's head whipped around.
"You stay out of this, Severus," she said.
"Personally, I would be inclined to… hear myself out if I were you," said the portrait of the dead Slytherin headmaster.
"Are you saying this boy is-" McGonagall stopped and shook her head. "Severus, that's impossible."
"It isn't," said Frank. "Just like Albus, I've been reborn." For a moment McGonagall looked as though she was about to faint. Then, gradually, she took tight rein over her emotions.
"That's impossible, simply impossible," she said briskly.
"But, Professor-" Frank began.
"Mr. Longbottom, no magic can raise the dead. What you are telling me is a bold-faced lie."
"Minerva, you are making a grave mistake," said Snape's portrait.
"Mistake? Mistake? Both these boys are obviously insane, unless, of course, Mr. Longbottom is simply playing a practical joke of poor taste. In fact, that is probably the case. I simply don't have time for this right now, you two. The centaurs may threaten the school at any time-"
"Doubt it," Frank muttered.
"Why not? They have attacked Diagon Ally already! The only reason no one was killed was because Aurors were immediately summoned to subdue the centaurs. Hogwarts may be in danger and you are wasting my time with childish pranks!" Frank looked over McGonagall's shoulder at the portrait of himself.
"Invincible ignorance," he said. Snape's lip curled.
"Indeed," he said. "You'd think that a witch that spent her time lusting after a man almost less than half her age would be more thrilled to hear that he had come back in a kissable form." McGonagall's face turned red.
"I never lusted after you, Severus," she said. Frank and Snape each raised their left eyebrow.
"Really?" they said in unison. McGonagall looked from one to the other, flabbergasted.
"Now I know you're both playing a joke on me," she said. "Severus, was this your idea?"
"When would I have the time to come up with such a plot?" he said seriously, though it must be admitted that his lips twitched slightly.
"Oh, you're always going away at night. Don't think I don't know." Snape coughed slightly.
"Actually," he said, "there are some very lovely waitresses down on the second floor. Get them drunk enough and they'll let you-"
"That is, I believe, the definition of too much information," interrupted Frank.
"Respect your elders, boy. I was just answering Minerva," said Snape.
"Yeah, you do that," said Frank, backing out of the room. "I'll be in my dorm, listening to The Hobgoblins." He quickly ran out of the office. When Snape was sure Frank was out of hearing distance he began to chuckle.
""I don't see what's so funny about this, Severus," snapped McGonagall. "Giving out details like that in front of an innocent boy." Instantly Snape stopped laughing and stared after Frank almost tenderly.
"Not innocent, Minerva," he said softly. "Too far from innocent." Suddenly he smiled at McGonagall evilly. "Besides, you should have seen your face when I mentioned those waitresses. You were red as a beet." McGonagall promptly became so again.
"Was not!"
"Was too."
"Was not!"
"Was too."
"WAS NOT!"
Exactly one week later Albus was sent to St. Mungo's, and Frank and Amos were forced to temporarily take over leadership of the Life Barfers.
Well, there you have it then. Remember, reviews are my muse's lifeblood.