Last nights episode. Some thoughts.

1. Tanner is moving into my A radar. She's totally not A, but she pushed and pushed and pushed to get them arrested. When it was Wilden's death she tried to get Hanna to do something stupid so she could take her mom's place. In Mona's she did the same thing. She knew if she could get one of them convicted she could get all of them. And now they apparently get kidnapped on the way to jail?

2. Toby Cavanaugh is a beautiful angel who deserves happiness and rainbows and cupcakes and puppies and the next person that hurts him is going on my life long shit list for fictional characters. #ProtectTobyCavanaugh2k15

3. "I am 8." The blocks say I am 8 before they say I am A in the promo. And then the promo talks about 9 deaths. Chronologically, the 8th death is Wilden, who is probably really dead. But for US, Bethany is the 8th death. And I just wonder if this is a hint.

4. I LOVED THE SPOBY SCENE. I did. I watched it about 9 times and was like a squeal-y mess. I was upset about Spencer not telling Toby about the kisses, but in a way I think she kind of did tell him about Collin, because when she walked away he looked like his life was over. And then he was like fuck it and fixed things and I love it. And now there's going to be Bro Time at the loft AND I CAN'T WAIT.

5. THE CREEPY ASS TWINS WERE GRINNING WHEN ALI GOT CONVICTED. Like full on grinning. What the hell is up with that? And this brings me full circle back to my very long "Mona Never Stopped Being A Theory," that I'm not going to type because this AN is long as hell.

REVIEW AND THEN SEND ME A PM WITH YOUR THOUGHTS. I am determined to figure this out before they tell us. So I would love to talk with you :)

Chapter 10

TPOV

He stood by the door, watching the aides situate Spencer in her wheel chair. He wasn't sure that anyone else noticed the way that her hands shook, but he couldn't keep his eyes off of them. It was just a slight tremor, but it was enough to make her very real fears known to him. There were too many people in the room. He wouldn't embarrass her by calling her out on it, as innocent as his motives may be. He stood beside her and grabbed one of her hands in both of his, gently cradling it.

She looked up at him, her brown eyes wide with both fear and longing. Her eyes were still framed by fading, yellow tinged bruises. The places where her skin scraped off her chin and neck were red and pitted. It would heal, but for now it looked rough and painful. She was still so beautiful. He ducked down and brushed a soft kiss over her temple. "You are so strong." He put one of his hands on her shoulder and kept the other tucked away in his larger hand. It made walking difficult, but that was okay.

"Are you excited, sweetheart? I know it's not exactly home, but it's better then a dull, white hospital room." Mrs. Fields was trying too hard to make Spencer's transport to a rehab center seem like an exciting transition.

Spencer just nodded dully, staring straight ahead. It wasn't unexpected, but her increasingly depressed state was heart-wrenching. He didn't know how to help her, and he wasn't sure that he should even try. Maybe she just had to feel this pain. Sometimes pain demanded to be felt.

The ambulance they would transport her in loomed in front of them like this kind of unpenetrable wall. Because the last time she was in one of these it was racing to save her life. And her dad was still alive. She certainly didn't remember that, but it was exactly like Spencer to make that kind of connection.

Mrs. Field glanced at him. "Toby, did you want to drive so you-"

Spencer made a noise that resembled a squeak and tightened her hand on his. Mrs. Fields looked down at Spencer then up at him. "Or-"

The EMT gave Spencer a reassuring smile. "Since you aren't critical we have space in the back for one other person."

She looked at him hesitantly. He gave her a soft smile even though his heart was breaking on the inside. How could she even think she had to ask? "If you want me to come with you I will."

Spencer nodded, her lips pressed so tightly together they were white. He ran his thumb down the length of her jaw as the EMTs got her off of the wheel chair and onto a stretcher. "Is this necessary?" She rasped.

"Company policy."

He dug through her bag until he came across a bottle of water and passed it to her. The look on her face was so outrageously grateful, and it cut him straight to the core. This isn't what her life is supposed to be like. He didn't even remember the drive to the rehab center. He was so focused on her face. Whenever she winced he winced. When she relaxed he relaxed. He knew he loved her long before this, but if he hadn't already known he would now. Because as every look of pain passed over her bruised face it was like a punch to the gut. Her pain was literally his pain. Actually it was worse, because he would gladly shoulder all of the pain in the entire world if it meant that she didn't have to go through this.

She let out a soft gasp as they went over a particularly nasty bump. He brushed his thumb over her knuckles. "You okay?"

She nodded, popping her eyes back open. "Distract me?"

"Didn't you have a history test coming up?" He was desperately searching for some kind of unoffensive topic. He didn't want to ask her about something that would make her think of her parents or of Melissa.

She rolled her eyes. "Yes. It was on the most boring of all this history topics in the whole freaking world. Manifest Destiny. The name sounds exciting, right? But it's just about a bunch of people moving west."

He would have questioned her further because that really did sound dull, but they pulled up in front of the rehabilitation center. "You ready for this?" He gently squeezed her hand. Part of him wanted to gather her into his arms and run away with her, to take her to a place with no memories and no pain. California, Europe, Antarctica... he didn't care.

She looked wary, but she nodded silently. He followed as the paramedics unloaded her from the ambulance, off the stretcher, and onto a wheel chair. Mrs. Fields walked around to them, looking at something on her phone. "Spencer, you're in 27A. Apparently it's in the duplex right behind the main office."

He looked around. This was more of a long term care facility, and they obviously worked to make it appear homelike. It was going to take Spencer awhile to get back up on her feet, to regain her mobility. And this was the perfect place for her. He smoothed Spencer's hair back as she flipped through a pamphlet. "I guess that this could be okay."

Mrs. Fields smiled. "I'm so glad to hear you say that! Toby, do you want to take her back while I get checked in?"

He nodded taking the keys from Mrs. Fields and directed Spencer's wheel chair onto the sidewalk. "This is nice."

She snorted. "Yeah, I'm sure that I'll be perfectly comfortable locked away here while I feel like an invalid. The flowers definitely will ease the embarrassment." She gestured angrily to the lilacs that lined the sidewalk.

He pulled the chair to a stop and locked it in place. He walked around in front of her and squatted down. He his hands on her thighs, tears pricking in his eyes. "You have nothing to be embarrassed about."

She swiped at the tears that were welling up in her eyes. "Yes I do. It's humiliating. I can't even move without help. I don't mind the cast, shit happens. People break bones. But I still am not strong enough to use crutches for more than a few steps. I can't take care of myself and I hate it."

He wanted to cry, but this wasn't about him. It wasn't about him and he wasn't going to make it about him. He took her face in his hands and waited for her to look at him. "You are always helping everyone else, Spencer. I know that you don't like it, but there's nothing wrong with taking help when you need it."

He laughed and pulled the blanket over their heads, poking her in the side. "I like this."

She giggled and squirmed away from him. "What do you like?"

"I don't know," he mused with a smile playing at his lips. "I just- I like feeling like we're in our own little world." He didn't invite Spencer to his house often, not because he was embarrassed of her, but because he didn't want her around his parents. But they were out of town until tomorrow.

Before she could say anything else the front door slammed shut. He sat up with a start, pulling her with him. "Shit."

She looked at him with wide eyes. "Is everything okay?"

He didn't talk. He just put a restraining arm across her chest, keeping her behind him. He doubted that his dad did anything with Spencer there, but he wasn't going to take that risk. Maybe he wouldn't even come in his room.

"Toby-"

The door sprung open and he jumped, pushing her more soundly behind him. His dad stumbled inside, the stench of vodka preceding his entrance into the room. "Toby!" He grabbed the door frame to stop himself from falling to the ground. "Where are my- Oh, am I interrupting something?"

His cheeks were tinged with red. He wasn't sure if he was embarrassed or mad. What he did know was that he didn't want Spencer and his dad in the same room for another second. "We were just leaving," he mumbled. He grabbed Spencer's arm and pulled her up, ducking past his dad and through the door.

His dad reached out and snagged Spencer's other arm. "Wait, wait introduce your young lady to me."

He froze for a second before ripping Spencer's arm away from his dad. "Don't touch her."

Spencer looked at him before looking back at his dad. She stuck out a hand. "Spencer Hastings, sir. It's nice to meet you."

He looked at her for a second, his critical eyes examining her. Toby would have been cowering away had Spencer not been here, but she didn't even flinch. "I'm helping Toby work on his history project, so we're going to the library. But like I said, nice meeting you." She grabbed her purse off of the table and walked out off the room. Toby followed her, not letting up on his vice grip on her arm.

He glanced back at his dad, internally reveling in the dumbfounded look on his lined face. It was nice to see someone put him in his place without even trying. And in that moment he was absolute certain that he loved her.

As soon as they were outside he dropped his protective stance and looked at the ground. "I'm sorry."

She took his hand. "You have nothing to be sorry for. But come stay with me for a few days."

"Spencer-"

She could hear the reluctance in his voice. Somehow she could pick his emotions out with ease. She continued quickly. "My parents are out of town on some conference, and I get kind of scared being alone anyway."

He laughed humorlessly and looked up at her. That was slightly manipulative but he found it endearing as hell, and he couldn't have been more grateful for her presence in his life. "He isn't always like that." Sometimes he's worse. But he kept that thought to himself.

She nodded, but her eyes were hard. "I'm sure he's not. But that doesn't make the times that he is okay. Let's go." She took his hand and directed him toward her car. "My mom left me with some money. Let's go get supplies and make an awesome dinner."

"I love you," he said softly. It was still new to him, those words. But they felt more right than anything ever had. It was funny how someone went from being just another face in the crowd to the single most important person in your life.

She smiled over at him. "I love you too."

"It's not the same. You were in trouble, and you needed me." She protested softly. Spencer was almost every good thing in the world, but what she had trouble with was seeing the impact that she made on other people.

He put a hand on the back of her head. "And now you need me. You don't have to admit it, but you know you need help in your mind. You never left me when I needed you, and I'm not going anywhere now. I love you."

She made some kind of noise that sounded like a cross between a laugh and a sob. "How do you always do that?"

"Do what?" He lightly ran a finger over her lips. He really wanted to kiss her, but he wasn't going to take advantage.

"Make me feel like that even though I lost everything that maybe there's still a reason to keep going," her voice was nearly inaudible, but he heard her. "I lost everything that is supposed to matter the most all at once." She paused. "I still have you."

He leaned in and hunched over, pulling her against him. Spencer was a hard person to comfort, and he was working on instinct, but he thought that this might help her. He enveloped her in his arms and pressed his lips to the side of her head. "And you're never going to lose me, Spence. I'm here. I'm right here for as long as you want me."