A/N: This is for Katrina a reviewer who left a review complaining about every sentence beginning a new paragraph then proceeded to tell me to get a beta if I didn't know how to do it right. Well I do that purposely as many readers over the course of me posting stories complain that it is too hard to read paragraphs that are too long.
As a courtesy to them I shorten the paragraphs a little. If I were to publish anything for which I expected payment naturally I would do things as they should be such as indenting at the beginning of each paragraph.
Older eyes don't see as well as the younger ones. I have even suggested to some readers to change the color of their documents when they copy and paste to read offline. I hope this explains what my intention was as to the paragraphs. Glad you took the time out to review. I would have sent this privately but you are not a registered reviewer. Hope you continue to enjoy my effort to entertain.
Chapter Ten
Hearts Desire
Once Erik ascertained he had not lost his mind and dreamed Raoul came offering to reunite him with Christine he could not move things along quickly enough to suit him. Every second spent on needless packing and planning were moments he could be spending with Christine. If not for the calming influence of Crystal Erik would have shaken the whereabouts of Christine from Raoul then grabbed the nearest horse and set off on his own.
His mind raced with what he might say. He well knew what he wanted to do. He wished he could steal her away so they would not have intrusions by anyone as he and Christine worked through just what their new relationship would be or if indeed there would be a relationship at all. With Raoul's pesky interference out of the way all he had to do would be to convince Christine he had become a more stable person. To enforce that idea perhaps he should stop devising ways to rid the world of one annoying nobleman.
She may well see him then come to the conclusion it would be madness to allow him to enter her life in any capacity. When his doubts plagued him he could count on Crystal to come to his rescue. If not for her he would have taken the journey with only the clothes on his back or simply got on his horse heading for parts unknown. She had to deal with the servants and instructions concerning their departure. His mind had become focused on one thing. Christine wanted to see him. She had sent Raoul to find him.
How he had managed to eat several meals with de Chagny still astounded him. He couldn't say he even remembered what they had spoken of other than making plans for their return to Raoul's home. and even those conversations were hazy.
Having never gotten anything he ever wished for Erik tried not to let himself think about his future with Christine unless he jinxed himself. Fate had a way of taking away anything that ever gave him joy. If he were to be honest a lot of the time he himself caused a lot of his problems as he tried to bend everything and everyone to his will.
It had even taken his music from him for a time. With Crystal's constant badgering he had at last conquered the mental block he had. For a number of months he could not sing or play one note. To do so would have his throat closing to the point he almost lost consciousness.
He had thought this deeply inflicted wound would never heal. Over the last few months he had been preparing himself to live out his life with no end in sight for the discomfort he always felt when he let memories of Christine seep into his mind.
In his wildest imaginings he would not have thought Raoul would be the one to deliver Christine into his hands again. If ever he had let himself think of seeing her once more it had always been through some stealth on his part. The way they had parted had not left him with any feeling that Christine would pine for having lost him or regret never seeing him again.
As hard as he tried he could not quell the excitement overtaking him. The slight rush of joy made him feel slightly uneasy as it usually meant a great disappointment would follow. Crystal had chastised him enough for being such a naysayer he could almost let himself believe this time would be different.
Even though he wished to immediately leave things had to be taken care of. Crystal had told him he had to be insane to think she would let him go anywhere without her. Erik did not remind her that she only lived as she did by his good graces. He had not and never would remind her that his money bought every single thing she ate, wore and even the bed she slept in.
Truth be told Erik felt he could never repay the debt he owed her even if he were to hand over every last coin in his possession. She had saved him in more ways than one. She had given him a piece of his soul back.
Erik would not travel in the same carriage as Raoul. He never would admit that he wished to show Christine his opulent carriage as well as his other riches. Twice the size and three times as ornate as the one Raoul had arrived in.
Being a man of some genius, Erik had installed several luxuries no one else would have. He had designed a heating system for the winter. It kept the inside of the carriage warm for a short time as the fuel only lasted about an hour. The insulation of the carriage however held in the heat for quite some time.
Raising the floor level up slightly had eliminated much of the dust from the horses hooves as well as the wheels. Vents had been installed for added airflow which would be covered during the winter.
A water jug equipped with a small spigot provided much needed liquid refreshment on long trips. His next project had been going to be to devise some sort of warmer and cooler to keep food for longer journeys.
Erik had even added a larger area to hold the many trunks. Little had to be placed on the top. Demitri and Raoul's interest in his carriage did Erik's pride a bit of good. To have Raoul envious of anything he owned lifted Erik's spirits. He had so little that Raoul could not obtain for himself. All Erik had that perhaps could not be bought were the things he invented.
Raoul had not been hesitant in expressing what he thought of Erik's mode of transport. Crystal rolled her eyes and huffed, loudly, trying to get the men to take notice of the time slipping by.
Men were such boys about certain things. If they lingered much longer she would bet all three men would be crawling underneath to examine the undercarriage which Erik had installed some devices that absorbed much of the jarring thus lessoning the discomfort inside the carriage.
Pointedly Crystal cleared her throat drawing their attention. For a moment her eyes met the Vicomte's. His look said she had interrupted a most important moment in history.
Sniffing dismissively in his direction she said, "I know you men must have your little boy moments gawking at things we women know nothing about but please refrain from wasting any more light. We…I would like to be at our destination before nightfall."
Erik nearly laughed aloud. He did snicker a little, which had the other two men looking at him curiously. He would not enlighten them to the fact that Crystal had helped him design many of the improvements or that she had installed almost all of it.
She may look pretty and helpless but underneath all that frivolous outer covering beat the heart of an inventor and craftsman, or in her case craftswoman. Crystal could work wonders with any tool. Her mind could pick apart any puzzle and piece it together faster than anyone Erik knew. He would not doubt her intellect rated higher than his own.
Being a woman she had never been challenged to show any initiative into areas deemed only fit for men. Erik did not know all of Crystal's past but little by little she had been revealing things about herself. She kept secrets as well as he did. She only let him in so far in the same way he had done all his life.
The journey had been made without incident. Raoul had felt further impressed when Erik had offered them a cool drink of water when they stopped to avail themselves of the bushes when nature called.
He looked with different eyes toward Crystal when Erik revealed how much she had a hand in the design and building of the carriage.
Speaking of Crystal gave Erik something to relate to the others without his tongue having him beg for more details about Christine. For him all other topics were a waste of time.
For some odd reason Raoul began seeing her in men's trousers and a loose shirt which slid off her shoulder every so often. The beginning bulge in his trousers had his face turning red.
His quick over the shoulder command that they load up and continue surprised everyone. They had been stretching their legs chatting companionably when Raoul had made his brusque order. Erik resented being told what to do therefore he took his own sweet time stepping back into his carriage.
Raoul didn't care if Erik became rooted where he stood. He had only given that overbearing command as an excuse to hide his ungentlemanly reaction to Crystal. If Erik knew of his thoughts concerning her, Raoul bet he would be sleeping with one eye open.
Erik's restless movements had just about driven Crystal mad. His sighing as he moved about only added to her irritation. She held off reprimanding him as she could well imagine his feelings at the moment. In a matter of hours he would face a woman he had loved beyond reason. Crimes had been perpetrated to gain advancement of her career.
If someone had done that for her Crystal thought she would have loved that man or angel until the day she died. In her entire life not one person had gone out of their way to give her anything. Of course she deplored Erik having taken livesand the fact he had nearly burned to the ground one of Paris' shining monuments to the arts.
Erik had taken extreme measures but one had to realize that for him the extreme had been the norm. He had not lived as other people did. Erik had never learned the same values that other children learn as they grow up. Never had he felt the love children deserve from the time they enter the world. No, she did not condone his actions but she did understand why he had done the things he had done. She and Erik had held many discussions on the different ways he could have taken to show Christine how he felt without turning to his darker side.
Her parents, although they had loved her as best as they knew how, were selfish people. Always their needs and wants had come before her own. If just a small portion of Erik's torment had been visited on her she too may hold his grim outlook on humanity. What had been done to her had been awful but she had not lost her belief in the general good nature of man.
Erik had been the only person to give her anything without demanding something in return. What she did for him she did of her own free will. She suspected if she never did another thing for him, Erik would still take care of her. He would still think of her as a friend. She of all people knew what it felt like to be able to put your complete trust in another person.
Crystal hoped this visit came out as Erik wanted it to. He deserved a little happiness. More than most he needed someone to love him without any reservations. The woman would need the patience of Job when dealing with one of Erik's insecurities. He needed constant reassurances that everything was as it should be.
Glancing across at Erik she could not help but smile. Erik had fallen asleep. In repose he looked so innocent, almost childlike. A man less childlike when awake she had never met.
It amazed her how sweet and kind Erik could still be at times given how he had grown up. She knew he had told her pretty much his whole life story but guessed that he had left out some of the more grime moments. What he had told her had been horrible enough.
Catching a sign stating the drive for the de Chagny estate was only a short distance, Crystal tapped Erik on the knee. She had learned the hard way never to touch him on his shoulder while he slept. He came up swinging for all he was worth at the slightest touch of a finger.
Erik did not wish to leave the wonderful dream he had been having. Crystal's low words informing him they had arrived drove away the last remnants of his dream. He felt the jolt of excitement that shot through him when he realized now he would see Christine in person.
He forced himself to exit the carriage sedately. Turning he offered Crystal his hand. Once she had found her footing he could not stave off turning to get his first glimpse of where Christine would be awaiting his arrival.
Erik chided himself for thinking she would be awaiting only his coming. Would she not welcome Raoul home more than her onetime tutor even if she did wish to see him?
Raoul swept past Crystal and Erik inviting them to join him in his home. If anyone had ever told him that he would be crossing the threshold of de Chagny's home by invitation Erik would have laughed until he collapsed. He would have claimed the teller of such hilarity certifiable.
Never having entered any home through the front door other than his own, Erik still found it an amazing feat. To come and go as normal men did still felt new and wonderful to him.
The door opened as if by magic before Raoul had taken a step toward the door. A very tall sedate gentleman stood holding the door open. He bowed graciously and welcomed "Master Raoul" home.
Erik felt a twinge of envy to hear Raoul addressed so. He would never attain that level of respect and it did bother him. He tried not to let it lower how he felt about himself but found it hard when as they entered the house there were servants lined up bowing and scraping as Raoul passed them.
To his credit Raoul stopped and asked some question or commented to each one. Their loyalty and respect did not come across as the type that had been bought by a salary.
Erik froze to the spot when he heard the unmistakable voice of Christine. He had the urge to turn and run away while feeling an equal need to climb into some wall or hide in the shadows so he could observe her without having her see him.
His doubts rose clamouring for attention. Would he not look horrible to her in the glaring light of day? Damn Raoul. Could he have not planned this so they arrived in the twilight hours? What difference that would have made with all the lighting about the house Erik felt too agitated to deal with speculating on the matter.
Nearly passing out because he held his breath so long, Erik at last exhaled when Crystal patted him on the back. He would thank her later but for now he needed every bit of his fortitude to stay uprigh as nerves overtook him. The trembling that had begun in his hands spread until his whole body shook as if overtaken by the cold chills.