Chapter 10: The Girls Talk 'Sleepless In Seattle' and 'Dirty Minds'

Addison stumbles out of an on-call room at some ungodly hour of the morning and shuffles towards the bathrooms. She needs to do something to her hair before anyone sees her, because otherwise it will be entirely obvious that's she's been having really, really, really amazing sex for the past few hours. What she hasn't been doing is sleeping, and that's going to be obvious come morning rounds too, but hey, sleep is for the weak. And the people not having really, really, really amazing sex in on-call rooms.

She smirks.

Because that's practically everyone except her and that makes her feel very, very smug. It is in fact the smug smile and not the contorted fringe that makes Cristina suspect Addison may have been having really, really, really amazing sex in an on-call room for the better part of the night. In fact, if Cristina hadn't been doing something similar herself, she'd probably have the energy to tease the attending, mercilessly, about her obvious 'lack of interest' in Mark (whom she rightly assumes is the person Addison has been having really, really, really amazing sex with). As it is, all she can manage is a yawn as she braces herself against the bathroom sink and watches Addison shuffle through the door.

"Jesus," Cristina rolls her eyes and then rubs at them, "I'd hate to see what would happen if you actually liked a guy."

The red-head blushes, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh, I don't know," Cristina yawns, "Maybe the fact that Miss 'I'm-Not-Interested' jumped the guy she's Not Interested in."

Addison shrugs, "I'm not interested. Technically."

"Was it that bad?" Cristina jokes, as she disappears into a cubicle.

"Oh no," is the quick rebuttal, "No. It was very good."

"Good?" Cristina raises an eyebrow and stares at an advertisement for an ovulation test, "How can you use 'good' to describe sex?"

Next to her Addison taps her fingers against her thigh nervously, "I don't know. I can't exactly say it was mind-blowingly toe-curlingly amazing. That many clichés in one sentence is enough to kill a girl."

Cristina shrugs, "Ok then. It was mind-blowingly toe-curlingly amazing. And you're not interested?"

"No," Addison shakes her head decisively, more for her own benefit than the intern who can't see her anyway, "Well. Maybe. A little. But officially, no."

"It's way too early in the morning to interpret the true nature of your feelings given the ambiguity of your previous assertion," Cristina mumbles.

"Do you always talk like you swallowed a dictionary at 4am?"

"Mostly."

"Wow, sexy."

"I try. Burke wasn't exactly complaining."

"I'm sure he wasn't," Addison grins, "Do you ever wonder about the conversations you have in bathrooms? Like what if there's someone else in here now? Are they going to think we're really strange, having a conversation through the walls?"

Cristina pushes open the door and makes her way to the sink, splashing her face with water, "Sometimes. Because out of context, most of my conversations sound incredibly odd. But don't worry, there's no one else here anyway. Apparently we're the only two getting any action."

"Or," Addison suggests, joining the intern at the sinks, "We're the only two whose lives are that screwed that we have to have sex in a hospital."

Cristina acknowledges that she may be right and Addison smiles, sleepily.

"I'm definitely going home tonight," she yawns, then pauses thoughtfully, "Well. Actually. Perhaps I'll stay."

Cristina's lips twist into a mocking smile, "You are so interested."

- -

In Addison's defence, it was an ambush. He was lying in wait, when she (the unsuspecting prey) cautiously pushed open the door to the stairwell in order to avoid the Curse of the Elevator. And was she really meant to object when he cornered her against the wall in between flights of stairs and kissed her good morning? Five times.

Several minutes later, they both look up to find Meredith looking down from the level above, bent over double with laughter. Addison turns an interesting shade of scarlet, as the intern bounds down the stairs, no doubt with an arsenal of teasing remarks at the ready.

"Good morning," she says brightly.

They both mumble a response and stare at the ceiling, or their shoes, or the spot of gum on the side of the third stair from the top.

"As a doctor," Meredith giggles, taking their silence as permission to continue, "I feel I have an obligation to inform you of my concern for your health. Jesus Christ, you're going to get the worst pash rash ever."

Mark blinks a few times and then smiles widely, "Thank you Doctor Grey, I'm glad that you're concerned. But damn," he turns back to Addison and winks, "It would be a good way to die. Right ladies, I'm off."

And as he leaves, Meredith backs away from Addison's murderous glare until she is cornered against the wall.

"I would be so mad at you," Addison tells her, "If I wasn't so incredibly embarrassed that I wish the ground would swallow me whole."

"So you're interested," Meredith shrugs, "You're single. He's single. He digs you. It's not a crime."

"Oh," Addison shakes her head, "I don't know. I'm fairly certain it's a crime to get involved with your ex-mistress."

"Not when your ex-mistress looks like that," Meredith jibes, poking her in the shoulder, "I mean, if you're not interested, I definitely might be."

"What right do you have to be so perky anyway?" Addison yawns, following the intern up a flight of stairs. A door bangs and they look up to find Cristina attempting to hide from George, who takes one look at all three women and promptly spins on his heel and swings the door open, mutterings something about women taking over the world.

Said women exchange bewildered looks and Cristina joins Meredith and Addison. Both Cristina and Addison yawn in unison, reminding Meredith of her previous assault.

"Ooh," the dirty blonde looks down at the attending mischievously, "Was someone up all night?"

"Sleepless in Seattle, as it were," Addison says wryly.

Meredith giggles, "Oh my, I thought I was the only one who thought that about that movie."

"Thought what about that movie?" Cristina looks confused.

"That it was going to be about sex," Addison finishes Meredith's thought, "And I know, it's terrible, it's wrong, but… what were we meant to think? It is called sleepless in Seattle."

"And when I think of sleepless nights," Meredith gesticulates with a free hand, "I don't think of lying awake and ringing up a radio station."

"Nope," Cristina catches on, "Definitely not."

"I mean, I was expecting something like Wild Things," Meredith rolls her eyes, "Not a cute five-year-old and a sappy love story."

Addison giggles, "Derek was so annoyed when I dragged him to that movie… and it was so different from what I expected, but I was a little mortified I was so wrong about it. I don't think I ever told him."

Cristina smirks, "Kind of awkward really. So, um, I totally thought this was going to be porn."

Addison snorts, "Yeah. Please continue to love me, even if I do have a dirty mind."

"I have the worst mind ever," Meredith declares with her hands on her hips, "Seriously. I laughed in the House of God. That makes me a terrible person."

Addison giggles again, "Everyone laughed in the House of God."

"In the sex scene? When he was fantasising about having sex with the nurse who was trying to revive the dead guy having a cardiac arrest?" Meredith narrows her eyes.

And Cristina laughs out loud, "Oh, that was priceless. And then he was picturing everyone in the room having an orgy and the Hawaiian underpants," she wipes her eyes, "Meredith, everyone laughed at that part."

Addison nods her agreement, "That part was sick. But hilarious."

"Maybe we just have dirty minds," Meredith counters, "Maybe we're sick, sick people who are obsessed with sex. And how much sex everyone else is having. And how much sex we're not having."

Cristina meets Addison's eyes and they both smirk, "You're the only one not having sex."

"Shut up," Meredith groans, "Why oh why did I ever decide to be celibate? Ever since then, things have gone down hill."

"Yeah, how's the knitting coming by the way?" Addison teases.

"Shut up," Meredith snaps again, "Not all of us are totally in love with plastic surgeons who worship us in every possible way."

The side of Addison's mouth curls upwards, "Oh yes. Well, that's too bad because you are definitely missing out."

"I told you that you were interested," Cristina remarks, with a satisfied smile.

Addison blushes.

"And Meredith," Cristina rolls her eyes, "Are you still going all Jane Eyre on McDreamy's ass?"

Meredith shakes her head, "No, but he wants to take things slower this time. Considering last time he picked me up in a bar and ripped my clothes off as soon as we were out the door, you'd think that two weeks would be slow enough to constitute slower… but no," she pinches at her arms, "No, we have to wait. I'm beginning to think he's never going to put out."

Cristina shrugs, "I'm not saying it's for certain, but he'll definitely put out before Finn."

Addison studies her fingernails, "This is awkward."

Meredith nods, "Um, yep. Awkward."

Cristina shrugs, "So you've both slept with the guy, one of you has married him, and now the other is dating him. Don't let it be awkward. Compare notes."

"He really does consider it an insult if you out last him," Addison remarks, still studying her fingernails.

"He didn't speak to me for a week!" Meredith exclaims, "It's not my fault."

"Tell me about it. And he gets lazy, after a while. I mean, I guess all men do. But we got repetitive and tedious after a few years. It was almost like a set routine for every day of the week, except it was more like the first Saturday of every second month, before he left."

"Is that why you slept with Mark?" Meredith looks worried.

Addison shrugs, "Not the only reason. But it certainly made the decision of accepting the offered sex a lot easier."

"And you're sure he wasn't cheating on you?"

"What? House of God style?" she raises an eyebrow, "He was married to his job. He didn't have time for me, he certainly didn't have time for someone else on the side as well. Besides, I would've known. I know these things."

Meredith's eyes widen, "Then I might have to sleep with Mark too."

Cristina giggles when Addison involuntarily narrows her eyes.

"Because I have a dirty mind and a girl has needs," Meredith pouts, "And if he can for that long without sex," she trails off, "I just may never get to be sleepless in Seattle."

And we arrive at the end for now. Nothing is resolved. Everyone is still moaning and whinging about the difficulties of being a woman. It's a lot like life really. On that note, if real life provides inspiration, I will continue. But for now, consider this complete because I'm channelling all my funny-life-moments into a post-3.02 story at the moment. Thanks for reading!