A/N: So I'm going to apologize in advance for killing yet another major character in the Arrow fandom, that way before you even consider reading this story you know that someone big in the fandom dies. That being said, it's not Oliver or Felicity, but it's still a main character in the fandom.
This story was written from a DustNight Pop Up Prompt. The words given to me were coffee, disappointing, and quit. The quote given to me was "I'm not bound to you. I'm not bound to anyone."
Beta love goes GaeilgeRua, without whom I wouldn't have a legible story for you all this evening!
Title: Sisterly Advice
Rating: M for language
Pairing: Oliver/Felicity
Summary: An untimely death can bring about feelings of self hatred and anger as well as ultimately making a person change their outlook on the future. With a little self reflection a person may finally take that step needed to make a change in their lives.
Definitely check me out on social media if you enjoy my work! I'd love to have you in my personal facebook group or even following my author's page.
Be sure to let me know what you think! Sorry for all the sadness.
Love always,
~starr
"I quit."
The simple statement didn't make sense to him as it made its way through his head. Nothing that passed through his head recently seemed to make sense. The last few days had been a complete blur, and nothing seemed to be lifting the haze that had fallen over both of them. Although that's to be expected when someone dies.
Furrowing his brow, Oliver scrubbed his hands over his face before running them over the top of his head. He exhaled as he lowered his arms and was met with blue eyes glaring at him. He could hear the faint tapping of her shoes against the bunker floor.
She was angry. He couldn't blame her, he was angry too. It wasn't supposed to happen this way.
"What do you mean you quit?"
His voice was cold, causing a shiver to run down her spine. Normally when he spoke to her, there was a sweetness there, almost as though he genuinely cared about her. Today was definitely different. If she was being honest with herself, she couldn't blame him. Everything was different now.
She took a deep breath and contemplated her answer carefully. The old saying was always to never argue when you're already angry, it just makes things worse. Although, at this point, she didn't really think that things could get any worse. The line that shouldn't be crossed had recently become too blurry to see.
"I quit," she replied, purposefully enunciating the words as she fought the urge to roll her eyes at his question. She hadn't stuttered or stumbled over her words. She was fairly certain she had been quite clear in her statement of her future employment with the Green Arrow.
Her entire existence on team Arrow had been built upon false hopes that were running out of legs to stand on. She thought that maybe there had been something more between the two of them, but as time continued to pass on, she was beginning to realize that the feelings were only one-sided. She was sick of having her heart trampled on by someone who didn't want to be with her or at least that's what he had convinced himself of in her opinion.
She could see it in his eyes. Every time she caught him staring at her out of the corner of her eye, she could see something that sparkled just for her. Or at least, she hoped it was just for her. She never had the courage to actually ask him. She would rather die than admit her feelings, just to have him tell her that he didn't feel the same.
"You quit what, Felicity?"
He looked at her with confusion radiating from his eyes. He was either being dense, or he was choosing to ignore the fact that the mission that blew up in their faces was her fault. Even the thought running through her mind hurt and she couldn't believe that it was the truth. Surely they could have found someone else to blame, but that wouldn't be an honest representation of everything that had gone on tonight.
Thea was dead, and it was Felicity's fault. There was no one else to blame but her. She had sent Thea into a location completely blind. How was she supposed to know that there was a line of men armed with automatic firearms waiting on the other side of the door? There had been zero heat signatures when she had checked the building. It wasn't until she heard the sound of the gunshots through the comms that she even knew anything was going wrong.
"I can't be Overwatch anymore!" The words escaped her lips louder than she had intended, but she wasn't about to back down. "I just can't do it anymore, Oliver. After tonight…"
"Tonight was not your fault," he replied.
She tossed her head back with a laugh and shook her head. "Only you would think that," she scoffed, turning on her heels and making her way to the raised platform in the middle of the bunker. She stopped at the bottom of the stairs and stared at the screens from a distance. She couldn't bring herself to take the first step. Doing so would mean that everything that happened was a reality and there was no going back.
He watched her for a few moments before making the decision to join her at the stairs. He could tell that she was struggling with this, and he wanted her to know that she wasn't alone in how she was feeling, but she couldn't continue to blame herself. It hadn't been her decision to let Thea go out in the field when she wasn't ready.
That had been his unfortunate decision in the matter. Actually, it had ultimately been Thea's decision. He had to keep reminding himself that he couldn't control what his sister did. When she put her mind to something, there was no changing what she had decided.
He placed a gentle hand on the small her back as he took his place beside her. He felt her entire body shiver at his touch, and he fought back the urge to smile. The fact that his simple touch had such an effect on her was amusing, but now was not the time to be amused. Now was a time to deal with everything that had happened.
"I'm so sorry," she whispered as a stream of tears began to roll down her cheek. As a sob ripped through her body, she felt Oliver pull her into his arms and hold her tight against him. She buried her face in his chest as the tears continued to fall and for a long time, it seemed as though they would never stop.
After what felt like an eternity had passed, Felicity finally pulled away from him and took a step back, allowing an empty void to grow between them. She wiped away a few stray tears that had begun to roll down her cheek and took a deep breath, wrapping her arms around her waist. "I know the news of me quitting must be disappointing, but I just can't do this anymore."
Oliver furrowed his brow and crossed his arms over his chest. "I'm not disappointed."
Felicity looked up at him, puzzled as she scrunched her brow. "You're not?"
Shaking his head, Oliver took a seat on the steps behind her and watched as she spun around to now face him, meeting his eyes with hers. "I can't be disappointed in someone who is brave enough to do what I can't."
"What can't you do?"
"Walk away from this life."
Felicity looked at him for a moment as the words he had spoken made their way through her mind. Something didn't quite add up, and she wasn't sure why. There was nothing in this life forcing Oliver to continue to be the Green Arrow. If anything, everything in this life was pushing him away from that life. So why was he so set on the fact that he couldn't walk away from this?
"Why not? No one is holding a gun to your head telling you that you have to be the Green Arrow or else they'll kill everyone you care about."
The words escaped her lips before she realized what exactly she had said. The pain stricken look that appeared on Oliver's face was what caused her to realize what had just happened.
"Oliver," she said, stepping forward and placing a soft hand on his shoulder.
"Don't worry about it," he replied coldly, rising from the stairs and walking past her deeper into the bunker. He was searching for something, but he wasn't sure what until he stumbled upon the ratty old punching bag hanging from the ceiling.
He took hold of the bag with both hands and looked at it momentarily. Felicity watched him from a safe distance away. Usually, when he looked at the bag with that expression, the bag was in for quite a beating. It didn't matter what had upset him, it just mattered that there was something he could take his aggression out on.
Suddenly Oliver took a step back, drawing his fist back behind his head and then furiously swinging it forward into the bag. There was an audible crunch as his knuckles made contact with the bag. Felicity flinched and covered her face with her hands, mostly because she didn't want to see the potential bones protruding from his skin.
Shaking his hand briefly, Oliver counter swung at the punching back with his opposite fist, hitting the bag with the same force as the first hit. A similar crunch rang around the bunker. However, instead of pausing to assess the damage, Oliver continued his onslaught of the punching bag.
Felicity watched him beat the dust out of the bag with hit after hit. After about fifteen minutes of constant punching, she had started to lose track of the numbers of times she was sure he had broken at least one bone in his hand. Shaking her head, she sighed and marched over to Oliver and grabbed his shoulder. Using all of her might, she forcibly pulled his shoulder back and made him look at her.
"Can you be done now? Your hand is covered in blood, and I'm pretty sure you've completely shattered all of the bones in your right hand," she said, crossing her arms over her chest and tilting her head to the side waiting for him to respond.
He opened his mouth to respond, but closed it quickly and looked down at his hand. She was right. He couldn't see the flesh of his hands because they were covered in blood. Apparently, he was hitting the punching bag a tad harder than he had initially intended. He pressed a gentle finger against the back of his right hand and flinched, pulling his finger away quickly.
"Hurts, doesn't it?" Felicity mocked, shaking her head. She reached out and cupped his elbow, leading him back to the center of the bunker. She pointed to the empty chair beside the conference table and waited for him to sit down. When he obliged her silent request, she walked over to the cabinet and found the first aid kit. Making her way back to the conference table, she stopped and collected a large bowl of warm water and a few towels.
"I'm not going to be able to set the bones back in place. I'll probably throw up if I have to do that, but I can at least get you cleaned up enough that people in the ER won't ask questions when you go inside. Why didn't you stop when it hurt the first time?" she asked, pressing the warm towel to the back of his hand.
"I was taking out my anger with someone," he replied, gritting his teeth in pain as she applied pressure onto the fractured bones.
"Who?" she asked, curiously looking up at him beneath her brow and smiling softly when she watched him flinch in pain when she wasn't pressing his hand all that hard.
"Myself," he replied.
"So you took your anger out on your hands with the punching bag?" Felicity sighed and placed the towel down on the table, pushing her chair back and walking over to the cabinet once more. She rummaged around inside for a few moments before returning once again and handing Oliver a mirror.
Furrowing his brow, he took the mirror out of her hands and looked at his reflection. He looked like hell if he was being honest, but he was fairly certain that she hadn't handed him the mirror just to take a good look at himself. "What's this for?"
"Tell yourself what you're feeling and why you are angry with yourself," she replied, crossing her arms over her chest as she sat back down in the chair. She rolled her eyes at the look he had given her and sighed. "It's better than shattering every single bone in your hand, isn't it?"
Oliver thought about it for a moment and shrugged. She had an excellent point. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before slowly opening his eyes to look at his reflection.
"I hate that I feel like I can't walk away from the life you've chosen to live. I hate that I feel like I'm bound to be killed doing what I think is right for this city because somewhere deep in my mind, I'm fucked up beyond all belief that I can't see the good right in front of me. I hate that I know I'm failing this city every night I go out hiding behind my mask and interfering with the investigations of the SCPD.
"I hate that the feeling of being bound to a future is what got my sister killed. If it wasn't for you, Thea would still be alive right now. She would be telling me that I was an idiot for not asking Felicity out for coffee when I first met her and realized I was falling hard for her. She would be reminding me that I was crazy about her and refused to admit it because I was too committed to this job. I hate that I blame myself for all of this."
Oliver's eyes flickered over to Felicity when he spoke about her and noticed the small smile on her face, but he quickly closed his eyes. He couldn't think about the potential for happiness right now. He needed cope with all of the other emotions he was dealing with at the moment before he could focus on the future that he wanted to have. He knew there was one last thing he needed to tell himself, even though he wasn't really speaking to himself. He knew he was speaking to the Hood.
"I'm not bound to you. I'm not bound to anyone," Oliver said coldly, placing the mirror face down on the table and pushed his chair back from the table. He walked over to where he kept his suit and stared at the fabric enclosed by the glass. He placed a gentle hand on the glass and took a deep breath. Slowly he turned and walked away from it. He made his way quickly to where Felicity was standing and wrapped a cautious arm around her waist.
He pulled her close to him and lowered his lips to meet hers, capturing her in a kiss unlike any other that she had ever felt before. She wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned into the kiss, now that the initial surprise of the action had faded away.
After a few brief moments, they both pulled away and rested their foreheads together as they tried to catch their breaths. A heavy silence fell around them and enveloped them in a sense of peacefulness after everything the day had led them caused them to run away from. Oliver was the first to pull further away, only to look down at the beautiful woman in his arms and smile.
"How about I take you out for that cup of coffee my sister has been insisting I take you out for?" he said, grimacing at the sad thoughts of his sister, but still smiling through it all the same.
"I'd love to," Felicity replied happily. "But first can we go see Dr. Schwartz to get your hand checked out?"
Oliver smiled and nodded his head. Keeping his arm around Felicity's waist, he led them out of the bunker and back out into the world. He knew that Thea wouldn't want him to sit around and mope about her death. She would want him to live his life. The dead would never be forgotten, only to be honored in doing that which makes him happy.
