Relief

posted April 20, 2010

Katara took the stairs slowly the next morning, still bleary from sleep. The old futon in Gran's study was usually comfortable, but she had turned over and over before finally sinking into a restless doze. Why am I even up this early? she asked herself, but entered the kitchen before she could think of an answer.

The smell of coffee already lingered in the air and Zuko stood by the bay window in the kitchen, studying the view of grass and trees and distant water. He turned as she entered, lifted his mug in casual greeting. "Your father said to make myself at home."

Katara stared at him for a moment, then decided that it was too early to decipher any hidden meaning in that statement. She simply nodded and turned the stove on under the kettle and tried to act like it was just another morning in her grandmother's kitchen. She dropped a paper filter into the basket, dumped a heaping scoop of ground coffee into it and set it all over her favorite mug, then waited for the kettle to boil. She gathered her hair back, combed her fingers through it and twisted it into a messy knot at the back of her neck.

The kettle shrieked as Katara smoothed a few last strands from her face and she reached to turn the stove off. Zuko moved hastily, turning back towards the window, and Katara realized he'd been watching her. She remembered flipping her hair just so to draw his attention; later, his hands pulling it from braids, sifting it through his fingers. Her face heated at the memory and she busied herself pouring hot water into the waiting filter. She wiped the counter as it dripped, then set the filter in the sink, splashed cream and sugar into the mug and stirred. She sipped, and sighed, and finally sat at the table. Zuko remained by the window.

Katara drank her coffee slowly, trying to ignore him, but found her eyes drawn to him. He wore an old t-shirt with Bato's company motto across front and back and he probably hadn't shaved the entire voyage up the coast. His hair was slightly mussed, neither the deliberately messy style he'd worn as Li nor carefully combed like she'd seen in Number Four's photos. Her fingers itched to run through it, muss it further, and she scowled into her coffee.

"I found the enrollment papers."

Katara startled at his sudden statement, then blinked. "Oh. Yeah." She shrugged. "I had an errand to run at the school, so I picked them up. I don't know if you want to put them straight into classes or not. You don't have to –"

"Thanks."

He said it awkwardly and Katara stared at him for a moment, then sipped her coffee again and studied his posture as he again stared out the window, noted the weariness and tension in the set of his shoulders. Most of her coffee was gone and her mind cleared of sleep when he finally spoke again.

"Why… are you doing all this? For us. For… me."

Katara had wondered that herself, as she'd driven a rental car from the city, backtracked by cab to a bus depot, met Sokka in the next town over to shake any pursuit. She'd told Number Two that she had to take care of some family business, had smiled and made the usual jokes and hoped that she sounded no different than usual. She thought of Number One's voice and that honest friendliness she'd seen once or twice from Li. From Zuko.

She finally shrugged. "Because like it or not, we're in this together. I owe you, Zuko, like you owe me. Seems only fair."

He didn't react for a long time, didn't move from the window, but finally sighed as some of the tension leaked from his posture. He eventually set his mug on the windowsill and crossed his arms and turned to meet her eyes, and Katara tried to let her face lay open for him. They studied each other for a long moment and Katara opened her mouth to say something – she didn't know what – when Xumei wandered in, Mister Pinky under one arm.

"What's for breakfast, Daddy?"

Zuko's expression softened as he crouched to smile at her. "Hi Sweetie. How'd you sleep?"

She yawned and returned his hug. "Good. Are there Cheerios?"

It was much easier, Katara decided, to talk with him with Zhang and Xumei in the room. Breakfast had been almost cheerful, as had the tour of the yard.

"Gran will probably let you feed the chickens, if you ask politely – and maybe collect eggs if you show her you can be careful." Both children had nodded eagerly as she held Rosemary for them to pet. The chickens hated to be picked up, but Rosemary tolerated the attention, regarding them with beady eyes and fluffing herself up when Katara set her back in the run. "They also love dandelions, if you pull them up."

She'd shown them the path to the water, too, and nodded when Zuko warned them not to follow it alone. He promised them a walk together later, then told them to go wash their faces. "Can I… borrow your truck?" he asked when they had clambered up the stairs, and Katara had tried to hide her surprise.

"Betsy."

"What?"

"Can you borrow Betsy."

He glared at her, but Katara said nothing, then quirked her brow. He scowled. "Fine. Can I borrow… Betsy."

"Why, certainly." She debated needling him further, but decided against it. "What for?"

Zuko shrugged. "I need to pick up some things. Make a couple of calls – I know the lines on the other end are secure," he added hastily, then ran his hand through his hair. "I need to make some decisions." The awkwardness returned and they stood in silence until Zhang jumped down the stairs with a grin.

Katara stepped onto the porch as she heard Betsy turn into the drive later that afternoon. The truck sputtered to a halt beside Gran's ancient wagon and Katara again debated ribbing Zuko, but the tension in his face pushed the thought from her mind.

"Need a hand?" she asked instead and he shrugged, which Katara took as permission. She grinned at Zhang, then pulled shopping bags from the bed. Groceries and underpants, she thought with amusement, but again held her tongue and helped carry everything inside. She waited in the kitchen while Zuko sorted through the bags, sent each child upstairs with a bag, and finally turned to her.

"How long are we welcome here?"

Katara covered her surprise with a shrug. "For however you long you need it." She returned his level stare. "For however long it's safe." For all of us, she thought, but didn't voice it.

Zuko looked away first, crossing his arms and staring out the window, the morning's broodiness returning. "I'll enroll them in school tomorrow," he said after a time. "I don't know how long we'll stay, but it will help them – give them something normal to do, to keep them from worrying." He snorted. "Though so far, they think it's just another grand vacation." He looked at her directly then. "How detailed is it?"

"Is what?"

"The information that your people have on me. On my kids." Only then did his voice betray anger, and Katara forced herself not to flinch.

"I only saw genders and approximate ages, no names." She hesitated for a moment. "Plus… the files might have been corrupted – Number Two's computer files, on you, and… your kids. What she learned from... her… people at the station." She said it carefully, met his eyes again.

"The files might have been corrupted." Zuko's voice was flat, his eyes narrowed in speculation.

Katara hoped her shrug looked casual. "The backups, too. They'll have to start from scratch."

He stared at her for a long moment, the quality of his expression somehow different, though no less intense. "Thanks," he said quietly, then Zhang and Xumei clattered down the stairs again and Katara let herself relax.