Chapter 9

"Commander?" Cullen looked up from the recent report on the status of the Hinterlands he was reading and called in the messenger. The man entered and said, "Leliana wanted you to know that the Herald and her companies will be arriving soon."

Cullen stood and asked, "How soon?"

"They will be at the gate any minute now." Cullen nodded and dismissed the man. Then he began to debate what his next course of action should be. Should he welcome her at the gate or wait for her in the war room? She had said in her last report that she had made her decision and will no doubt call a meeting immediately upon her return. So he should wait for her there. Cassandra will meet her at the gate. But she will no doubt be tired after her journey and perhaps it might benefit her to see a friendlier face than the Seeker's. So he'll meet her at the gate. But what if his presence has the opposite affect and makes her feel pressured to give her decision? He'll wait in the war room.

"Commander?" He turned and saw that the same messenger was back. "The Herald has called a meeting in the war room."

Shadow took a deep breath, feeling everyone's eyes on her as they waited for her decision. She hated it. Honestly, they may not be actively trying to pressure her at this point, but she sure felt pressured. Not knowing who exactly she should look at, she kept her eyes on the map of Thedas as she finally spoke. "I've decided to approach the Templar Order."

Cullen let go of the breath he wasn't aware he had been holding. He had thought for sure she was going to choose the mages. He hadn't lied last time they spoke. If she had chosen the mages, he would've respected the decision because one had to be made. But like she had pointed out, that didn't mean he would've liked it.

"Are you sure Her- " Cassandra cut herself off when Shadow narrowed her green eyes at her, irritation clear on her face.

"You asked for my decision, I've given it."

Cassandra gave a sharp nod. "Then we must prepare."

"I will contact the noble households that have agreed to accompany the Herald to Therinfal and inform them off the decision," said Josephine. She began scribbling on her board. "They should be ready within the week." She walked out without looking up.

Cullen spoke up, "I can have some soldiers ready to accompany the Herald when the time comes."

"That won't be necessary, Commander," Cassandra said. She held up a hand when he began to protest. "We are attempting to gain an audience with the Lord Seeker and while he may become intrigued with the number of nobles with us, he will not take kindly to a small force. No, it is best that it just be the Herald and I."

"And Varric and Solas," said Shadow. Cassandra raised an eyebrow but didn't comment.

Cullen sighed, "Very well." He noticed one of his recruits waiting for him through the now opened door and nodded to the man. "If you need me, I shall be working with the recruits." He tried to catch Shadow's eye while he walked out but she purposely kept her face averted. He shrugged off the sting he felt and decided he'd talk to her later. I knew I was going to regret that hug.

Cassandra also excused herself when Cullen left. Once she had exited the room, Shadow closed the door and turned to face Leliana. The hooded woman was smiling.

"I suspected there was more to your decision than just approach the templars," she said.

Shadow nodded, "I chose the Order to approach for help with the Breach because it makes more sense to weaken something we don't understand rather than strength something else we don't understand." She shook her head. "But I don't want to not help the mages."

"I want to get the children and Tranquil out."

Leliana tilted her head. "Why?"

"I talked to some of the mages in Redcliffe, including a few Tranquil. They all say that Alexius has no need for the Tranquil and has even ordered them to go. But then we found that locked cabin…" She closed her eyes for a moment before continuing. "He may not have a use for them being alive but dead seems to be a different story. And they can't defend themselves." She glared at the map. "And I don't care how much Fiona claims that the children were never meant to be part of the deal, she's an idiot for thinking he wouldn't want them too. She was supposed to protect them and instead she's forced them into servitude." She turned her now furious gaze into Leliana. "I want to get them out."

Leliana nodded. "I have agents in the area who can safely smuggle them out, along with any other mages that may be brave enough to turn against Fiona and Alexius. Once they're at the Crossroads, our forces will be able to protect them until it is safe to bring them here."

The hooded woman blinked in surprise at the smile the Herald gave her. She wasn't surprised by the action but rather the amount of emotion it conveyed. She wondered if the Herald was aware of the amount of emotion she was showing.

"Thank you," Shadow said, relief filling her as she realized she could still help some of the mages from the horrible fate Fiona had forced on them.

Leliana looked as if she were going to say something but was interrupted by raised voices outside the room.

"I demand to talk to the so called Herald!"

Dorian? Shadow shot a look of confusion at Leliana before rushing out of the room. She was brought up short when she saw Cullen, the Tevinter mage, and Mother Giselle all arguing. Dorian saw her and started toward her, rage clear in his eyes. "What is this that I hear about you abandoning the mages to their fate?"

Cullen quickly placed himself in front of the mage, his hand on his sword ready to draw. "Stand down mage." He had seen the man talking to Varric a few minutes ago and the dwarf must have told him Shadow's decision because he had quickly gotten angry and marched to the Chantry. Cullen had followed, worried what the man intentions were.

Dorian glared at the Commander and poked his breastplate. "Or you'll what, Templar? Smite me?"

"Don't tempt me," Cullen growled.

"Stop this!" Shadow rushed forward and placed herself between the two. She looked up at Cullen. "Let him talk. Please?" Cullen nodded slowly and stepped back but kept his hand on his sword and his eyes on the mage. Shadow turned to face Dorian. "I'm not abandoning the mages."

The mage crossed his arms. "Really? So you're not seeking to ally with the Templar Order?"

Shadow sighed. "I am approaching the Order to help with the Breach but that doesn't mean I'm abandoning the mages."

"What do you think Alexius is going to do once he hears that you went to the Templars? He's not going to continue sitting there in Recliffe waiting for you to show up again." Shadow saw what appeared to be a light red glow surround his body. "I thought you wished to help all the mages."

Cullen tightened his grip on his sword as he felt the mage begin to pull on the Fade. Leliana placed a hand on his arm and whispered, "She has this Commander."

"I do wish to help and will. But we need to close the Brea -"

"Fasta vass!" Dorian took a step back. "I should've known better than to rely on southern help." He gave them all one last glare before turning on his heel and marching out.

Leliana stepped forward, "I will immediately send a bird to my agents in Redcliffe, Herald." She placed a comforting hand on the woman's shoulder before walking away.

Cullen started to approach Shadow, who hadn't moved. "Herald, I -"

"I need to go prepare for the journey to Therinfal. If you'll excuse me." She took off running, slipping into stealth before she exited the Chantry.

"Do not worry, Commander." Cullen turned to Mother Giselle as she spoke. "When she is ready to talk she will."

"She doesn't need to deal with this alone."

The woman smiled. "She will learn that in time, Commander. Meanwhile, we must make sure we continue to stand by for when she does."

This is real, this is real, this is real. Shadow struggled to keep her breathing even, to focus on her surroundings. She could hear everyone else talking but couldn't seem to focus on what they were saying. The room seemed hazy and she felt terror at not being able to tell if this was reality or not. This is real. Envy has no hold on me. I'm free.

You will never be free.

"Lady Shadow?" Shadow felt herself snap out of the terrifying experience and looked up at Cullen. His eyes were full of concern and she could feel the dark thoughts flee and hide within the furthest corners of her mind as she stared into them. "Are you okay?" he asked, his voice just as full of worry as his eyes.

Shadow suddenly was aware that everyone was staring at her and felt embarrassed to have been caught not paying attention. "I'm sorry. My mind was distracted."

Leliana narrowed her eyes at her. "I was just saying that the terms of the alliance you made with the Templars doesn't benefit the Inquisition as it should." She crossed her arms. "You should've consulted us, Herald."

Shadow glared at the hooded woman. "There was no time. I made the best decision offered to me at the time."

Leliana turned to Cassandra. "Why didn't you intervene?"

"I stand by the Herald's decision."

Shadow gave a small smile of thanks to Cassandra before returning to glaring at Leliana. "You sent me there to secure an alliance with the Order. I did. I'm not sure what more you could've wanted, but we went there seeking help with the Breach and now we have it."

Leliana held Shadow's gaze, both conveying their frustration with the other. Leliana was the first to break it. "You have a point, Herald."

Josephine smiled now that the tension wasn't nearly as thick. "I will immediately begin making plans to secure a lyrium supply for our new allies."

Cullen nodded and added, "A few dozen veterans are coming ahead of the rest to help us with the Breach."

"How soon until they arrive?" Shadow asked.

Suddenly, there was a flash and smoke filled the room. When it cleared, a young man wearing a large floppy hat was crouched on the table, holding one of the markers. "They're almost here," he said, inspecting the item in his hand. Pale blue eyes met green. "Templars don't like to be late."

Everyone moved at once. Cassandra and Cullen both drew their swords, Cullen saying in surprise, "Maker!" Shadow was surprised when he moved around the table and placed himself between her and the young man. She looked over at Josephine and had to fight back a giggle at seeing the irritated look on the woman's face. Apparently she didn't like being pushed back when Cullen had made his way to his current position. Leliana had taken a step back but otherwise looked unaffected by the strange appearance.

She looked back as the visitor spoke again. "I came with you to help. I would have told you before but you were busy."

Shadow attempted to take a step forward but Cullen stretched out his free arm in front of her, keeping her back. She narrowed her eyes at him, but he kept his on the visitor. "It's alright Cole." Cullen finally broke his gaze from the young man and fixed it on her as she spoke his name. But this time she refused to meet his questioning gaze, keeping her's on Cole. "You just startled everyone, appearing out of thin air like that," she added, smiling apologetically.

Cole tilted his head. "But I wasn't air. I was here. You didn't see me. Most don't until I let them." He made to move off the table and Cullen moved back, forcing Shadow to move with him.

"Call the Guards. This creature is not what you -"

Leliana interrupted the Seeker. "Let's not be so hasty. I am curious as to why he came." Shadow found herself less irritated at the hooded woman.

Cole continued facing Shadow, seemingly speaking only to her. "You help people. You made them safe when they would have died." He tilted his head again. "You succeed where other would have failed." Shadow's breath caught as she looked at Cullen in shock. He was staring at her too, sharing the same shock at hearing the words he had said to her not too long ago. She returned her attention to Cole as he continued to speak. "I want to do that. I can help."

Cassandra sneered, "How altruistic of you."

Cole spoke faster. "I can be hard to see. I won't get in the way," he begged.

This time Shadow forced Cullen's arm down and step toward Cole, taking the young man's hands. "Of course you can stay and help."

"Herald!" Cassandra protested.

Shadow looked at her. "Cole saved my life at Therinfal. I wouldn't have been able to defeat Envy without him."

Cassandra glared at Cole, still holding her sword at him. "But what does he want now," her voice was full of distrust.

Shadow sighed. "I think he really just wants to help." Cole began mumbling again about not being in the way and Shadow squeezed his hands in an attempt to convey it was alright. She didn't completely understand why she trusted him. Like Envy, he had been in her mind at Therinfal and while he had been helping her, past experiences have lead her not react kindly to such an invasion. But some internal part of her trusted Cole and she found that she didn't mind that he had been in her head. Well, maybe she minded a little but she didn't feel herself becoming lost within the dark thoughts when she thought about it. She knew that it wasn't his intention to trap her.

I would never hurt you like they did. Shadow blinked as Cole's voice flowed through her mind, pushing the dark thoughts further back. She gave him a small smile and hoped that the thought of thanks she had made it across. When he smiled back, she figured it had.

Cullen lowered his sword slightly but kept it drawn. The creature may have saved the Herald at Therinfal, but he didn't trust it. And the fact it had repeated what he had told the Herald that night in the temple ruins made him uneasy. "You're not honestly suggesting we give him run of the camp?" he asked.

Shadow let go of Cole's hands and turned to face Cullen, irritation on her face. "And why not? He's not a prisoner."

Cullen tried to reason with her. "We don't know what he is. We should have our men keep an eye on him to make sure -"

"Um, that may be more difficult than you think," said Josephine.

Cullen and Shadow looked away from each other and saw that Cole had disappeared. "Where did he go?" demanded Cassandra.

Shadow shrugged. "It's a neat trick of his. You'll get used to it."

"He's disappearing act is even better than yours Herald," Leliana said, smiling. Shadow rolled her eyes at the woman. "I will have people watch the boy for now, though it'll no doubt be a difficult task. In the meantime, we can begin preparations to close the Breach."

"The… boy was correct in saying that the Templar veterans will be here soon. Within the day," said Cullen. "They should be ready to help soon after they've settled."

Shadow took a deep breath. The familiar feelings of doubt and fear started to flow back. "And then we close the hole in the sky."