Fic: Falling Awake

Rating: Nothing bad here, unless you would count angst.

Feedback: Of course, feedback is like our crack!

Summary: Just when George thought his life couldn't get any more complicated, it does.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything, unfortunately. It would be cooler if I did though.

Spoilers: All the way until the end of the episode "The Other Side of Life" after that my version takes a different route. I started this fic over the summer so this season doesn't really count, any similarities is only by coincidence. If you haven't watch S4 yet and are staying away from spoilers don't worry nothing here will spoil you.

A/N: Many thanks goes to those who have already read a lot of this and help me sort through my writers block. It was much appreciate! :)

Just a little warning, the medical situations in this may be completely off, I don't know anything, really, when it comes to hospitals or medical knowledge, so prepare yourself for having to suspend your imagination and belief.

/000/

Izzie place a medical chart on the rack behind the nurses' station. She sighed as she looked at her watch for what felt like the millionth time that day. She was surprised to find that it was only 11 p.m. She was on call for the night and she figured that like the rest of the week, her shift would drag by at a snail's pace.

It had been a week since Callie had ambushed her in the locker room, a very long week because she had forced herself to stay away from George. She hadn't been back to see him since he woke up, when she was in his room with the rest of the interns and doctors. The whole week she had to plan her day around the fact that she had to stay away from him. She volunteered to work the clinic to put as much space between herself and his room as much as possible. She made a mental note not to go to his floor. She had even avoided Callie and his mother. When she saw one of them walking down the hallways, she promptly went the other way. Once she saw George in a wheel chair in the hallway and she had to make a beeline for the supply closet.

She also figured Meredith must have caught on to her avoidance act, because she would drop an update about George's condition into their conversations every now and then at home. She was incredibly grateful for her friend's little updates and unspoken understanding. Staying away from George had been one of the hardest things she's ever had to do. George was the first thing she thought of in the morning and the last think she thought of when she went to sleep and behind every other thought in between. It only felt natural to think about him. It was like some invisible force pulling her to him. However, even though Meredith's reports had always been good, she wanted to see his improvements with her own eyes. And sometimes she wanted to see him just to tell him about her day. To tell him a funny thing a patient had said or vent about some long intense surgery. But she didn't. She never gave in to her temptation to go see him. Not because Callie asked her to stay away, although the other woman's plead did brake her heart a little, but she stayed away from her best friend turned into something more, because she had promised him she would if he ever woke up. She was going to keep her promise to him. If he wanted a normal life with his new wife she was going to make sure he had it by staying out of the way, even if it did break her already fragile heart completely in the process.

Izzie shook herself from her thoughts as she turned and started down the hallway again. She decided that if she was going to get through the night that she would need to keep a cup of coffee in her hand at all times. She was headed down to the cafeteria when she heard her name being called out.

"Dr. Stephens?" a faint voice called out from a room to her left.

Izzie tuned to the room from where the voice came from and peeked her head into the room. She found the elderly lady she had been taking care of when she got the news about George's accident staring at her from her bed.

"Mrs. Harris," Izzie said, a little surprised that the patient was still there. She walked into the room and notice the older lady was lying in her bed breathing hard. "Are you feeling okay?"

"Oh, yes dear," The older lady said in between hard breaths. "I'm just a little winded. Apparently, the short walk to the bathroom can be like a 5k marathon these days."

Izzie smiled at her as she picked up her chart laying on the bed table to read over it. She hadn't been in her surgery so she wanted to see how it went.

"How's your friend?"

Izzie looked up in surprise.

"How did you know about my friend?" Izzie asked, curiously.

"Oh, well when you rushed out of my room before I saw your face. It looked like you were the one who were about to have your chest cracked open for surgery. So I figured something serious must have happened and forced Dr. Burke to tell me. He wouldn't give me any of the juicy details though. He's not a very talkative person."

"Oh," Izzie said, looking back down, blushing at the fact a complete stranger could read her so well. "Well it was touch and go there for a while, but he's doing better now…I guess."

"You guess?"

"I mean I know he's okay… it's just a long and complicated story. And one that probably shouldn't be shared between a doctor and her patient."

"Well, I know all about long and complicated stories," The elderly lady said, but stopped due to a flare-up in coughing. Izzie realized that she couldn't catch her breath, so she quickly grabbed the oxygen mask hanging over her bed and gently placed it on her face.

"Just relax, Mrs. Harris," She said, calmly.

The elderly lady took a few deep breaths and her coughing finally started to calm down. She laid her head back down on her pillow and gave Izzie a thankful smile from behind her mask.

Izzie went back to her chart but soon looked up in surprise.

"You didn't have your heart surgery?"

Mrs. Harris smiled and briefly pulled her mask back. "It's a long and complicated story."

Izzie smiled at her response and shook her head. "Sounds like more of a chickening out type of story. Mrs. Harris you needed that surgery…"

"No, dear. I didn't," She said, pulling her mask off now that she could breathe better. "I don't know if you've notice this or not but I'm older than dirt."

"Mrs. Harris…" Izzie said, trying not to laugh. But she cut Izzie off.

"I'm older than dirt and decrepit. And walking to the bathroom is a marathon for me. But I've lived a long and fulfilling life."

"Yes, but the surgery can make sure you keep living a long and fulfilling life and make that whole bathroom thing not a marathon."

"Dear, I'm rounding on my 90's. After you've hit my age there isn't much life left that doesn't involve an oxygen tank strapped to your back or a poop bag. That's no life." She said, smiling softly. "Do you know how long my husband Johnnie and I were together before he passed away a few years ago? 61 years."

"Wow, that's a long time," Izzie said, smiling.

"And not nearly enough. It's been five years since he passed away and I've missed him every second since he's been gone. I just want to see him again. My life now… it's not a life I want, not with out my Johnnie by my side."

Izzie thought about the older ladies words for a moment. "So you're giving up the fight?"

"If he were still alive…or if you told me that surgery could give me one more day with my husband… you would have to race me to the surgery room. But not for this life. This life, there isn't anything here worth fighting for, so what's the point. I'll let you big shot doctors save the surgeries for someone else who's got something to fight for."

Izzie look down sadly.

"Don't worry, dear. I'm not going to go out and call Dr. Kevorkian anytime soon. You see, I am fighting. I'm fighting to see my husband again when I'm finished with this life. But I'll let nature's take its course. And soon enough I'll be with my Johnnie once again."

Izzie nodded her understanding. She placed the medical chart back on the table in front of the bed. "Well Mrs. Harris, it sounds like you've already made up your mind. I hope you get what ever you're fighting for soon enough."

"Thank you," The older lady smiled. Izzie smiled as she turned to go, but turned back when Mrs. Harris called.

"Dr. Stephens, if you don't have anything in your life worth fighting for, than get something. Don't believe those people who say life is too short, its not. It's long and winding and tiring. But its what you have in it that gives you the fight to go on. So find something that's worth fighting for and hold on for dear life, dear. That's about as good as crazy, old lady advice, I can give you."

Izzie's smile from before slowly dropped as she swallowed hard and nodded her understanding. Izzie turned and left them room wondering how a complete stranger could say something that could hit so close to home.

/000/