Disclaimer: The Mortal Instruments belong to Cassandra Clare
"What did you just call me, Downworlder?" Jonathon hissed, his anger sharpening his face and sparking in his eyes.
Clary laid her hand on Simon's arm before he could respond. She could see him changing as his temper took hold and his vampire nature started to seep out.
"Boys, people can see us and I think it's a little too late to throw up a glamour now." She smiled apologetically at the people nearest them, each looking away as she met their gaze.
"Sit down and we'll talk." She reasoned. Simon's face swiveled to hers.
"Sit down? Sit down with this-- this--demon?" he stammered, gaping at her like she'd sprouted another head. Jonathon, for his part, was turning a fine shade of purple. She wasn't sure if it was outrage or shame, and in the middle of the crowded restaurant, she didn't really care.
"You're a fine one to talk demons, vampire. At least I can still say the holy names."
"Only for your infernal rites, you spawn of Satan" Simon fired right back.
"That's enough. Now." she warned, her tone and her eyes equally hard. "Simon, there are things you'll have to hear now, I guess. And you," she continued, rounding on her brother, "You would do well to remember that Simon is more my family than anyone you've ever met."
They both snapped their jaws shut and glared at each other. She watched as Jonathon took a deep breath and reclaimed his seat. Simon looked at her hard for a long moment before he too perched on the edge of the seat between them.
The din of the restaurant picked up around them as others resumed their own conversations.
"Some things may have changed Simon, and I needed to know more for my mother's sake." she started in.
"If he's threatening Jocelyn--" Simon started, his incisors protruding again. Jonathon once more looked ready to explode, but Clary interceded.
"No. He's here because he's changed. He's looking to know the family he was deprived of for all those years." Could Simon hear the sarcasm in her voice? Could Jonathon?
Simon looked from one of them to the other, disbelief plain on his face. Jonathon jumped to his feet in disgust.
"Look Clary, this isn't going to be easy, no matter how we do it. I'll leave now, so you can handle this however you think is best. Here's my number and my address. If you want to see me, call or come by. It doesn't matter when. I'll want to see you." He slid a folded piece of paper across the table to her. When she'd picked it up and put it in her pocket, he nodded.
"Goodbye, Clary. I hope I get to see you again." Without looking at Simon, he turned and left.
When the door had swung shut behind him, Clary slumped in her seat squeezing her eyes shut as she exhaled the breath she hadn't realized she was holding. Simon's voice intruded her moment of quiet.
"What are you playing at, Clary? You don't honestly believe that line do you?"
"It doesn't really matter what I believe, Simon. I have to know if it's true, if he really has been saved, for my mother's sake. You never saw her on those nights when she'd bring out that box. She didn't even know I knew. But I did. I saw how it killed her to have lost him. If that's changed somehow, I need to know. She deserves to know."
Simon was quiet for a moment, thankfully. She took another sip of her tea, reveling in the warm spices.
"I never really believed it was as easy to be saved as those guys on the bikes made it out to be. Their flyers are full of false promises. I think eternal damnation should be harder to shrug off than that." Clary choked on the last of her tea in laughter. Simon smiled at her, his usual supportive self shining through.
"Okay, so what does Jace think?" he asked, perfectly naturally. Her eyes flashed to his, wary. "You haven't told him, have you?" Her silence was answer enough. Shaking his head he went on. "That's a bad idea, Clary. Not only do I not like you doing this alone, he's going to have an aneurysm when he finds out. And he will find out, you know that, don't you?"
" I'm not doing this alone. Magnus knows." He arched one eyebrow in response. It said plenty. "And I don't want Jace to find out because he'll rush off after him. I know he'd be justified after Max and after what Jonathon did to him. I just wanted time to find out the truth first."
"And you want to keep Jace safe. And maybe a little part of you wants to hurt him for what he did to Jace, right?" She studied her cup sleeve intently.
"I just need a little time, Simon. He's been staying with a witch, Pandora. She's saying she found a way to heal him in Valentine's old journals. A way to keep the demon at bay, make him more…human. Magnus is looking to see if what Jonathon and Pandora say is even possible. If it is, then I'll have to tell my mother. If not, I intend to kill him."
"Just like that, in cold blood? You think you'll be able to just walk up to him and take him out?"
"Yes, I know I can. I already tried." Her voice was flat, remembering the fury that coursed through her as she had brought the dagger down.
"I'm sorry? You already tried to kill him? And now you're sitting here having tea together?"
Clary eyed the other cup. "Technically, he didn't drink his." The look Simon shot her was impatient at best. "Alright, fine. I saw Jonathon the night I was supposed to come over. I was crossing by the park and he was there. And I remembered it all. Everything he did, everything that happened to Jace, to everyone. And this hate and rage rose up and took over me. I was shaking with it I wanted to kill him so badly." She dropped her hands into her lap and studied her palms as if they held the answer. "I'd never felt like that before. I didn't even know I was capable of feeling such rage." When she looked up, her eyes were remote. She stared out the window, not seeing the street before her. " I had my dagger. It's the only weapon I was carrying at the time, and he had already shown me he was unarmed. I think he was going to let me, Simon. He just sat there, waiting for me to swing it at him."
"And?" he prompted when she'd fallen silent.
""And I couldn't do it. He has a witch with him, she stopped me." She left it at that. She didn't want to go into how Pandora had stopped her, but a shudder ran through her at the memory nonetheless. He watched her expression as it finished out the memory in her head. She wasn't having an easy time with this, and he knew if he didn't support her, she'd shut him out and do it her way anyway.
"Alright Clary, I'll give you the time you need. But you need to promise me you won't do something stupid. You have to swear to me that when the time comes, you'll take me with you. I don't want you to go after him alone."
"Simon, I don't think--" she started in, but he cut her off.
"Have you given any thought to what your life would be like without me in it?" he asked.
"What?" She looked at him blankly, unsure where was headed.
"Have you ever considered what it would be like to have to go on with your life after something terrible happened to me, after something maybe even killed me?"
"No." she admitted softly. She couldn't really picture her life without him in it. He was a part of her.
His face was grim when he continued. "Well I have. I've had to think about what my life will be like after all of you have gone. My family, my friends-- all of you. All of you will die, and I'll still be here. I don't like it one bit. I think it was harder for me to come to terms with your eventual death than it was to accept my change in the first place. I'm not letting you do anything stupid enough to put you in danger prematurely. So those are my terms. I'll give you all the time you want. You can buy my silence with your promise not to go off on your own without me."
Clary was silent a few moments while she considered. She'd come so close to losing him already, she knew how that felt. There was no way she was ever going to be responsible for harm coming to him again.
"Alright Simon, I'll tell you when I know what I'm going to do," she agreed.
After they'd left Jamba, they were still two blocks away when they spied Alec. He had seen them first, and was flagging them frantically from across the street. He was already talking when they reached his side. Turning back towards the Institute, they had to scramble to keep up with him.
"We called your cell Clary, you didn't answer." She pulled the phone from her pocket and saw there was no life in it.
"My battery's dead," she mumbled, smacking it against the heel of her hand. As she smacked it repeatedly, she started to fall behind. Alec was nearly jogging and she was no match for his long legs.
"You shouldn't go out without a working cell. If there's an emergency, we need to be able to reach you." Clary had an uncharitable thought that he was becoming too accustomed to being the older brother and an adult in the eyes of the Council
"Is there something wrong, Alec? Your heart's racing," Simon asked, lengthening his stride to match the much taller boy's. There was a moment's hesitation and then Alec glanced at her, not Simon. A cold knot formed in Clary's stomach.
"We met a pack of Matsema demons. They're particularly vicious by nature. They're demons of hate and will fight until the death regardless of the circumstances. We were fairly outnumbered." He paused and glanced in her direction again. "It was a rough fight, but we got them all in the end."
"Well, I don't see what the emergency is then. I'm sure you've been in rough fights before. I've been there for a few myself." Simon was chattering on nervously. He never bantered with Alec like this. He could guess why Alec had come looking for them. Clary knew what was coming, but it wasn't until he looked at her and said the words that she felt the panic rise up to choke her.
"Jace is hurt."
And then Clary began to run, his words pounding in her thoughts like a frantic heartbeat.